Private Dancer (15 page)

        
The dancer threw a small tantrum alone in the house, emptied the open bottle of wine and flopped down on the couch, exasperated. She replayed the night in her head again and again. God, Reece was wild, practically over nothing. She had never seen her show that much emotion over anything. All at once it hit her...from beginning to now, all the little oddities in the boss' behavior where Faith was concerned. All leading up to tonight's rage. She was hurt.

        
"She was terribly hurt, which can only mean..." She said it out loud with as much awe as if she discovered the Rosetta Stone. "Good God...Reece is in love!" She took a minute to let it sink in. This was bad, no, terrible. It wasn't something she, or Reece for that matter, was prepared to deal with. A blatant display of emotions just wasn't within her abilities.
Then again,
she thought,
what the hell was tonight all about?
If she's able to show this much ferocity, in any capacity, pity the woman on the receiving end of her love.

        
Cori got going while the coast was still clear. She had to find Faith. Boy was there a lot to talk about. She just hoped the woman was going to accept her explanation for Reece's apology. If not, the two women wouldn't be able to work in the same state, let alone a club together. Faith will be more lenient, she was sure, but Reece, she wasn't so forgiving. Oh God," she groaned. "Then I have to deal with Reece." If the air wasn't clear between them the boss would spontaneously combust.

        
When Reece stormed off, she instinctively walked cross-town towards her club, fighting with herself half the way. It was cold and a long distance to cover by foot, but with the energy radiating off of her body, she barely felt the chill and made it in record time. She had heard what Cori was saying, but needed to cool down to really hear it.
Yeah, I'm pissed!
she thought.
So? Am I not allowed to blow off some steam once and a while? And I am not being irrational.
She tried to justify the way she was acting.
Okay, so I'm just a tad off the handle, maybe I'm hormonal or something.

        
She stopped into a coffee shop on the way and got a very large cup. Now that she was less worked up, she was beginning to feel the cold. "Ahhh, hot caffeine." She felt it traveling downward inside of her and sighed.
Who does Faith think she is anyway? She's not so special.
She started drifting back to when she met the blonde: the handshake, the tingles, the blushing, the fantasy. She felt each experience all over again. This kind of stuff never happened to her before.
What is going on with me? I really did get unreasonably angry. I can have anybody I want. So why her?
The tall woman was getting frustrated with herself and her show of emotions tonight. eaching the door to her club, she glanced towards the garage longingly for a moment. Quickly re-routing herself, she entered the garage.

        
Amazingly enough, Cori found Faith at home.

        
"I'd have thought you'd be out drowning your sorrows or something."

        
"You forget I know how pathetic those people are." Faith sat on the couch, still wearing her jacket.

        
"Talk to me. I need to know what's going on. I think I made sense of Reece's point of view, now let's hear yours."

        
"What did
she
have to say for herself? And don't tell me she's sorry."

        
"No, she never said that, but I don't think I've ever heard her say those words anyway. You can tell when she is." The dancer sat on the floor in front of the bartender, laying her hand on her thigh. "Please talk to me. All I know is that I went to the bathroom and when I came back, you guys were a hair away from a pop shot."

        
Faith smirked at the memory. "Yeah, but it would have been a meaningless 'pop shot' for her."

        
Cori tried to come up with an explanation for Reece.

        
"It would have meant everything to me." The blonde started to cry. "I made an ass of myself."

        
"Faith, no you didn't, she made an ass of herself. I don't know how to explain her actions tonight, but I know what's in her heart. C'mon, take off your coat and stay awhile. This is going to take some time."

        
"What could you possibly say to make me feel better? Did you know she gave me an ultimatum?"

        
"What? What did she say?"

        
"Well, sort of an ultimatum, she said, not quoting, that the opportunity may only come this once. I really blew it. I just should have let it happen and kept the memory. Me and my idealistic fantasies... I'm such a jerk."

        
"Oh no, I'm not going to listen to that shit. You sit here, stop crying, and listen to me. You are not a jerk, and you didn't blow anything. She is a very complex person who has a very odd way of showing her feelings. I know because I study her, it's all in the eyes."

        
"I can't look into them; my IQ seems to drop a few dozen points. I thought if I drank, I'd have more courage, but it just made me dumber, more willing to submit to her."

        
"Well, that's a strange way of putting it, but I heard she can have that effect. You have to understand, she's feeling something that she's never felt before. I'm not saying that she was right in her actions, but that's a defense she has…anger is her easiest emotion. It's the one she's most comfortable expressing. Any hurt turns into anger and she lashes out."

        
"What are you trying to say? That that's her way of saying she likes me? Please, Cori, I couldn't survive the affection," she said sarcastically.

        
"No. What I'm saying is, she more than likes you, but I don't think she's even aware of it yet. When you turned her down, she went nuts! I braved the storm and realized she's hurt. You can't be that terribly hurt by another person unless they mean
a lot
to you. See what I'm saying?"

        
"I might. Are you telling me that she feels something for me, in a more than just a fuck sense?"

        
"Oh, much much more. I think you actually sneaked inside a crevice and got into her heart. I could be wrong, but I never saw this from her before. She would have just thrown you across the room and wouldn't have wasted her energy even thinking about it before going out and getting laid. She really hurt tonight. You made something happen that confused her emotions."

        
"That's a lot of power to lay on me, Cor."

        
"You have it. You have the capacity to make her feel. That's a good thing."

        
Faith smiled thinking about it. She needed time to think. Was risking this kind of behavior worth Reece's affections? On one hand she could see them married with kids, on the other, she could see herself getting very frustrated with the woman, long before the honeymoon. "I have to toss it around in my head for a while, Cori."

        
"I gotcha. Let's get some dinner."

        
After stopping home, grabbing a few items for her trip, and changing into more suitable attire, Reece was rumbling through the city streets in search of answers. There wasn't anyone in her life that mattered, or cared enough, to understand. The only person who knew her inside and out was dead.
Ah, I can't do this,
she thought.
What do I say? How do I make up for not being there?
She started to panic, and that wasn't good. Concentrating on the sound of the Harley and the sting of the wind on her face, she immediately felt content. She turned onto the highway, leaving Manhattan behind, and relaxed, stretching her legs out to reach the cruising pegs. It was going to be a long ride.

        
After arriving at her destination hours later, it was closed and she had to climb over the fence to get in. Reaching her goal, she squatted down and cleaned the debris off of the headstone. "Hey you, it's me." She studied the stone. "You picked a rotten time to be dead. I finally need you, and you can't help me. Asshole."

        
She could almost hear him now, "Ay! Such an ugly mouth on that face!" She settled down on the dirt with her back against the granite. "I didn't make it to the funeral... Fuck, Uncle Frankie, I didn't go because I didn't want to see you dead. If I don't see it, it won't be real right?" She lowered her head in shame. "I wasn't ready for you to die yet. Selfish huh?"

        
This wasn't so bad, she could imagine his answers to her and it was almost like he was there. "Um, remember when you told me what love was? Yeah so, did you get these, like, shocks, and you stutter, and you couldn't control your emotions? Cuz, I gotta tell you, either I'm in love, or ready for Bellevue." Reece sat there until the sun came up.

        
*  

        
The club was jumping tonight; it was very crowded and the atmosphere was great. Faith was working behind the bar and Cori was sitting on a stool, swiveling herself around in circles. It had been a week since ‘the incident'. Faith learned a lot about Reece and was starting to understand her better. Cori learned a lot about Faith and they were closer than two friends can get. Unfortunately, Reece learned a lot about herself and she wasn't getting along as well as those two. She was cranky, fidgety, irritable and unhappy. She learned that no matter how many women she touches, not a one of them compares with Faith. Her lips were the softest, her mouth the hottest, and her skin the most delicious.

        
She knew it would never go away. Every time she opened her eyes, it wasn't who she wanted it to be It was becoming less and less satisfying to get off. Even if she did it herself, she couldn't bring about the same power she felt the first time. Now that she tasted the real thing, she needed it like a drug. nd with sex being her only means of tension release, she was going mad. he also learned she cannot be around the bartender without either feeling hurt, speechless, or weak. And when the men flirted with Faith...she was enraged with jealousy. To top things off, Cori was talking about getting her up on stage. Reece didn't think it was a good idea and said as much. Cori told her she was being ridiculous not to give her a chance.

        
The dancer stopped swirling around and focused on bright green eyes. "Hey, babe, just thinking...wanna try a set tonight? It's crowded and I think you'd do great."

        
"Yeah? I don't know. Are you positive that she said it was okay?"

        
"I said she didn't say not to. Come on...please?" She pouted.

        
"Oh, stop that." The bartender threw a rag at her. "I can't...not yet. I still don't have the nerve."

        
"You have enough nerve when we practice at home. So, why don't we do a two girl show?"

        
"Cori! That would mean we have to make like we're having sex. I certainly can't do
that
."

        
"Do I smell or something?" Cori waved the air from her crotch up to her nose.

        
"Moron. No, I just don't think I can do that. You're my best friend, and we
do
have to touch each other..."

        
"I bet if you make believe it's
her
, you'll do just fine."

        
Faith smiled. "Stop that, I know what she feels like, smells like, it's etched in my brain. Speaking of, have you seen her today?"

        
"Nope. Still Hurricane Reece. Blows through, makes someone cry, and she's gone. She'll come around."
I hope so,
she thought.
She can't let this go, she just can't.
The dancer crossed her fingers.

        
"I don't think so, Cori. From what I hear, she's been practically fucking them on the pool table. I think she's over it. She can't even stand to look at me anymore."