Promise Made (The Callahan Series) (4 page)

Gram took her hand and stopped her. “Just let it out.”

Kate couldn’t keep the tears from forming. She took a deep breath. “Erik asked me to marry him.”

“Oh my goodness. What did you say?”

Kate gave a wry chuckle. “I’m here, aren’t I? No, really. I didn’t know what to tell him. It took me by surprise. We hadn’t really dated. Business lunches, coffee, nights where we went to dinner. Since we always talked shop I thought they were for business. I like Erik. I appreciate him. He was prosecutor when he took me on as his assistant. When he went into practice, he asked me to come with him. But you know all that. I’m babbling.”

“Do you love him?”

“I’ve never thought of him that way, so what can I tell you? He’s a nice man. He’s been good to me. I very much like the fact that he loves animals. He has a couple of cats he adores. Do I want to live the rest of my life with him? If I had to answer right now, I’d say no.”

On the other hand, maybe this type of caring would be better than the passionate relationship she’d had with Dugan. Maybe this one wouldn’t frighten her as much. She’d have to think about it.

The same panic—the same feeling she’d had years ago had reared its ugly head when Erik asked if she’d marry him. So much so that she couldn’t even talk to him about it. Just like she hadn’t explained anything to Dugan after she'd left him at the altar. It was a wonder he even spoke to her now. Both times, she’d just run away.

Who would understand why?

She had to get over this phobia or whatever it was. She couldn’t go the rest of her life like this. Not if she wanted a family.

“Gram, I think I’m afraid of the C word. I think it’s because my dad abandoned me. Not once, but many times. I love my dad. When I was young I put a lot of hope in him. I think I run from commitment because I’m afraid the man I marry might be like him. But I’m a mature woman now. I should be able to get over it. Shouldn’t I?”

You would think understanding the reason that compelled her to fly into panic mode at the first mention of marriage would change the sudden urge to flee. But just talking about marriage and commitment sent her stomach into spasms.

“What about Dugan?”

Kate’s heartbeat kicked up a notch. She ignored it—ignored the fact that seeing him had brought up memories and feelings she didn’t want to explore. “It’s been five years, Gram. I’m over him. He’s over me.”

Gram gave her a strange look, then quickly looked out the window.

Despite the way Kate’s wary heart had jumped at the first sight of Dugan, she
was
over him. It had been a long time. He had gone on with his life, held an honorable position, was well respected, and almost engaged. He could do a lot worse than Mary Jo.

So why did he still make Kate’s heart do funny things that made her sad?

“Have you talked to anyone about this?” Gram asked.

“Like a professional?”

Gram nodded. “The reason could be a simple one, you know.”

“Sure. I left one man at the altar. I ran from another the minute he proposed. Simple enough, don’t you think?”

She sat there, arms crossed over her chest, her chin out. No matter what Gram said, Kate knew her reaction wasn’t normal. If this kept up, she’d die an old maid. Not that being single was a bad thing, if that’s what you wanted. It’s just that deep inside Kate wanted marriage. Wanted a loving husband and a house full of children.

She’d never have them at the rate she was going.

“Katie-Girl. Stay here and make this your home again. You need to be where you’re loved.”

If only it was that easy. Her insides had twisted into knots when Dugan walked into Molly’s. What did that tell her? They’d loved each other once and she’d walked away. Erik loved her and she’d walked away. She clearly had a problem with men loving her. Or at least
saying
they loved her.

It didn’t matter. It was time to come to terms with her problem once and for all.

“The town could use another lawyer, you know.”

“They have Karl Theiss. They don't need me.” And who would she get for clients, anyway? Not those who didn’t want her anywhere near Dugan.

Gram let out a sound of disgust. “Karl is too full of himself. At his age, you’d think he’d stop making grandstand plays in court. Thinks his name is Perry Mason.” She looked at Kate with pride and admiration. “You’re wrong, Katie-Girl. This town does need you.”

“You’re prejudiced, Gram, but I have to admit the idea is tempting. Very tempting,” she added, but didn't really believe Oaktree needed another lawyer. Gram was just being loving and supportive, like she always was.

Kate got up from the table. “Enough about my problems. I was too tired to unpack last night. I’ll do it now.”

Gram stood and took Kate into her arms. “It’ll be all right. Wait and see. You’ll come to a decision about this marriage proposal. Better still, you’re home now.”

Chapter Three

Dugan didn’t understand why Kate brought out all the long-ago feelings of hurt and rage. Dammit! He didn’t want this. He didn’t want his life disrupted by the woman who’d dumped him without a qualm and never looked back.

After she’d left, she’d never called, never explained. He’d ventured once to ask Grace. She’d only told him that Kate had been too young to take on marriage.

Totally not true.

But, other than short, forty-eight-hour holiday visits to her grandmother’s, she didn’t come back. Enough time had passed now that he should be over her.

And he was.

So, why this anger? Why were his thoughts turning to her at odd times during the day?

His thoughts should be on Mary Jo. She was a good person. She would make any man a good wife. But, a little voice reminded him, Mary Jo didn’t evoke the same kind of passion Kate did.

Still, Kate was part of his past, not his future. Simple enough. Right?

He buried his head in his hands; glad the office was quiet for a change. Why had she come back?

If she stuck to her normal custom, she’d be out of town in two days, tops, and the gossips would have other topics to dwell on. His life would get back into its normal rhythm, the anger and hurt would disappear, or at least be buried once again.

He was counting on it.

As usual, the day turned busy. By the time his last chore was completed, his desk clear, it was time for his date with Mary Jo.

He spotted her the minute he walked into Molly’s. She was sitting in the same booth where Kate had been this morning. Hours ago. A lifetime ago.

She waved as he made his way to her, stopping only twice to say hello to a couple of folks.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hi yourself.”

“Have a busy day?”

“The usual.” Mary Jo wasn’t herself. There was a look in her eyes he hadn’t seen before.

“I guess you heard Kate’s in town.”

“I saw her.”

His eyebrows lifted. Then it hit him that Kate didn't usually stay long enough to be spotted in town. But that was his fault for giving her a ticket to pay. Still, she could have mailed the payment in.

“The two of you were coming out of Molly’s this morning. I saw the way you looked at her. The way she looked at you.”

“Sorry you had to see my anger. It surprised me.”

Her mouth turned up at the corners. “That’s not what I saw.”

“Oh?”

“You still love her, Dugan. If you didn’t, she couldn’t hurt you.”

He took her hand. “You’re wrong. I wish she was anywhere but here disrupting my life.”

“Which is exactly my point. Her being here should mean nothing. Instead, you’re angry and upset.”

Stunned, he just sat there. “That’s not true.”

Her eyes held a sheen of tears. What had he done? “Have you ordered?”

She shook her head, making her curls bounce. “If you love her,” she said softly, “I understand.”

She started to leave. He took her arm, gently, and made her sit back down. “You don’t understand. It’s been over between Kate and me for years. Why wouldn’t it be? She left me, Mary Jo. I don’t want her back.”

“Tell yourself that. When you finally believe it, let me know.”

“Mary Jo?”

She gave him a sad smile and left. His hands shook when he put a couple of bills on the table and walked out. By the time he got outside, she was gone.

Did he want to follow her? Try to make this right?

He shook his head. Right now he didn’t know what would
be
right. He did know he was hungry, and thirty miles down the road was the best cook in the county.

He’d have dinner at the ranch. It would get him out of town and away from the prying eyes and sharp tongues of the town gossips. He wouldn’t be compelled to do something stupid, like go to Mary Jo and beg her to stay. She was right. He had to get over this hurt and anger once and for all. Years ago, it had taken him a long time to accept the fact that what he and Kate once had was gone.

Why didn’t Mary Jo believe that? She couldn’t be right.

It was simple. Kate brought back too many memories. His insides tightened. He could almost feel and taste her again.

Not good.

With little traffic he was at the back door a half hour later. It was home. The small house that came with the job of sheriff was just that. A house. This large rambling ranch house was home. The fields and barns were as familiar as the face he saw in the mirror.

Mark, Donovan’s adopted son, ran to greet him.

“Uncle Dugan! Wait until you see. Susie walked today. Can you believe it? I didn’t think she’d ever stop crawling. Dad says she’ll be big enough to run and play soon. How long do ya think it’ll take? Next week? I can’t wait to take her for a ride on Snowman. Except Dad says she has to be able to walk first. How long do you think?”

Dugan chuckled. Eight-year-old Mark hadn’t been this excited since the birth of his baby sister. He swung Mark in a circle, made him squeal. Then raced him into the kitchen.

His mother smiled when the two of them burst through the door. “I hoped you’d be here. I made your favorite dessert.”

He kissed her on the cheek. “I can always count on you, Mom.”

Phyl walked in, her daughter Susie, in her arms. She gave him a hug. Ever since he’d taken a bullet in the shoulder when a killer chased Phyl a couple of years ago, she’d given him special treatment. Not that she didn’t treat all the family with love and consideration, but she went out of her way to make and take him special treats, and always gave him a bigger than life hug. Donovan was lucky to have her in his life. Dugan wondered if he would ever be so fortunate.

“What’s this I hear about you?” Dugan asked as he took Susie out of her mother’s arms and held her high. “Your big brother says you can walk. Wanna show me?”

Susie giggled, then drooled as he sat her on the floor. He stepped a few feet away, knelt down on the floor and held out his hands. “C’mon, Princess. Show Uncle Dugan what you can do.”

“She’s real wobbly,” Mark explained. “But Dad says she’ll get better every day.”

Mark adored his adoptive father. He looked up to Donovan, emulated him. It was a pleasure to watch them together.

Dugan waited as Susie got her balance and teetered toward him. After the third step she fell forward. Laughing, he caught her up and hugged her tight. “You did good.”

“Isn’t she smart?” Mark asked. “Dad says not every baby can walk at nine months. Most wait at least a year. Mom says I was real smart, but I didn’t walk until I was eleven months old.”

Dugan gave Mark a noogie. “Your sister’s an Einstein,” he said.

“What’s an Einstein?” Mark asked.

“A smart person,” his mother replied. “Now go wash up. It’s time to put dinner on the table.”

“Where’s Don?”

“In the barn. We’ve been involved with a difficult birthing most of the day. He’s cleaning up.”

They were well suited. Phyl had been raised on a ranch, had worked in a veterinary clinic before she showed up here. While Donovan was away, their mother had hired Phyl to run the ranch. She’d been great. Now she was a real helpmate to Donovan. The woman was amazing. She could do anything on the ranch from repairing fence to birthing calves plus everything in between.

Not only was she good at ranching, but a good person. When Phyl and Donovan married, they’d agreed Mom would live at the ranch with them. Most mothers didn’t get along with their son’s wife as well as Mom and Phyl did. But they’d been friends before Phyl even met Donovan. Phyl had told him more than once his mom was the mother she never had, and the grandmother her son adored.

Dugan had never heard a cross word pass between the two women.

Donovan was beyond lucky.

Even Douglas, the guy who for years was the one who loved all the ladies, had fallen in love with Lisa after her attempted murder a year ago. They’d been married for six months now and you’d think they were still on their honeymoon.

Only Dugan and Darin were still single.

It seemed as if they’d stay that way. For a minute there, he’d thought Mary Jo might be the one. But until he settled this issue about Kate, he couldn’t make a commitment to anyone.

Donovan grinned when he came into the kitchen and spotted Dugan. “Figured you’d be here when I smelled chocolate cake.”

With a sigh, Dugan sat down to eat. He looked around at Donovan’s contented expression. At the love reflected in Phyl’s eyes—the devotion and admiration in Mark’s as he looked at Donovan. Even baby Susie smiled her sweet smile at them all. His mother glowed with pleasure. Kate’s image flitted through his mind. He could see Kate here sharing this same kind of happiness. Always could. Funny, he’d never pictured Mary Jo the same way. He envied his family. Wanted the same.

Maybe he just hadn’t found the right woman yet.

****

“Smells wonderful, Gram,” Kate said when she entered the kitchen. But then, Gram’s kitchen always smelled wonderful. Since Kate didn’t spend much time in front of a stove and Gram’s food was the best, she looked forward to these visits more and more.

Gram dropped a pan, bent to pick it up. She seemed nervous.

Kate asked, “Did you say what time Ed would be here?”

“Six,” Gram said sharply.

“Are you all right? You don’t seem yourself.”