Push The Button (10 page)

I will know you. Believe that.

So, do I get to see what you're wearing?

No.

Why not?

Because you don't yet know that you will not be questioning me, that's why.

......

Fix your face, woman.

Fine.

Lol. This is going to be fun.

What is?

Again with the questioning. Tsk tsk tsk.

Sir...

Bedtime for you, Nicole. We'll talk in the morning.

David E. Woods is offline.

****

Conversation with Mr. Woods

10/31/10 8:30 a.m.

Good Morning, Mr. Woods. Are we still on for this evening?

Good morning, Nicole. Yes, we are. I touch down in Philly at 6. You’re arriving at 5:45, right?

Yes, Sir. That’s correct. Want to meet at 30th street station?

No, the hotel is fine. I don’t want to risk delays and have you waiting. I reserved the room in your name to be safe. Don’t worry about leaving a card for incidentals, I’ve taken care of that

Ok. Sounds good. I’m excited to finally meet you! Finally we can get our scheduled to work out, right?

Yeah. It’s been tough. I was beginning to think you were avoiding me.

Why would I do that?

Who knows? You know how these internet things can be. Folks fake out a lot. You might be a faker.

You really believe that?

Nah, I’m just fucking with you lol. Plus, I’ve seen you on camera. I’ve seen you be nasty on camera. LOL.

There YOU go smh

I may go, but you sure came. Yes, indeed
.

So did you. So…

We’re not talking about me, though. Are you wearing what I requested?

Yes, I am. Red blouse, black skirt, red heels, hair down. It’s the first Halloween in a LONG time that I’m not going out in costume.

You must be special. At least it’s Monday and not a Saturday night.

I am special. If I weren’t, you wouldn’t be meeting me tonight. Good. I look forward to seeing you draped in red in person. I bet it looks great against your skin.

Red does go well on my skin

Are we still discussing clothing, Nicole?

Hmmmm.

I asked you a question. Answer me.

No, Mr. Woods, we’re not still discussing clothing.

To what were you referring, then?

Red marks, welts, bruises…

Do you enjoy receiving those, Nicole? I imagine they look divine on you. I hope to adorn you with my own… jewelry… at some point.

It would be an honor to be so adorned, Sir.

As long as you recognize that. Meeting. Talk soon.

***

11/1/2010 11:17 p.m.

From: "Nicole White"

To: "David E. Woods"

Subj: Home

Good evening, Sir.

Writing to let you know I’m home, as instructed.

You asked me to outline three things that I hope to achieve during my training which is to begin in 3 months. I had time to reflect upon them on the way home, a bit. Here goes:

1. Above all, I want to learn how best to serve you. I want to learn your needs and your wants and make sure they’re fulfilled at all times. I don’t ever want there to be any voids in your life that I could have filled had I been more in tune with what you were seeking from me.

2. I want to push the envelope of my pain threshold. I want to build with you in such a way that I trust you to help me dig deeper into my craving for it and how I am able to manage it.

3. I want to be trained in complete surrender and submission. I want you to guide me in that journey and provide me with the help and tools I need mentally, physically, and emotionally to do so.

If you require further elaboration, please let me know.

Good night,

Nicole

****

Conversation with Mr. Woods

11/1/10 11:38 pm

Good girl. Miss you. Sleep well.

****

11/2/2010 3:37 a.m.

From: "David E. Woods"

To: "[email protected]"

Subj: Sleepless…

What have you done to me, woman?

I’m sitting up in my bed writing this email, trying to work through things that I don’t fully understand.

Who are you?

Why are you here?

Why did you come into my life now? In the way that you have?

I watched you walk into the hotel and found myself struggling to breathe. I coughed, not realizing I was holding my breath. My God, woman, you are insanely beautiful. I saw you before, but I was able to truly see you. Your walk is hypnotic, your stride so confident and sexy. I looked around and the other men noticed it too and something in me almost snapped. I wanted to rip their heads off for ogling you that way. The way I was. I felt immediate possession and protection of you. I was experiencing a revelation of some powerful Truth that I’d never been told and it was you.

I silently watched you check in, flashing that smile I’d seen so many times in various pictures and on camera, but it was brighter then. You were glowing and I was so drawn to your light, I wanted to run over to you like moth to a flame. It was so hard keeping my cool.

Damn girl.

I scared the shit out of you when I came up behind you at the elevator, didn’t I? LOL Your expression was priceless. Glad I caught your bag for you. You should know that I have great reflexes and my reaction time is impeccable. You can trust in that. You recognized me after a few seconds and embraced me, without hesitation. I could feel your comfort with me. I can tell the difference. You melted into me. You seemed to breathe me in for a minute. Was that so? Were you breathing me in? Your eyes were closed. Your eye shadow was nice. I love how you do your make up. You don’t need it though. I’m not just saying that. I know you feel more comfortable with it, but we’ll work on that.

Your lips.

You have the softest lips I’ve ever kissed. You’re a fantastic kisser! I knew you would be, but I just wanted to say that. I don’t know why I’m going on rambling and such, but I just have to get this out.

I loved how easy our conversation flowed over dinner, how your genuinely laughed at my jokes, how everything about you is so passionate and real. You are one of the most authentic people I’ve ever met. It’s clear to me that you’re sincere in your compassion and you’re just… you’re just dazzling. That’s the word: Dazzling.

And even though you were under no obligation to, you let me have you. You gave yourself to me, openly and freely. Again, without hesitation. You trusted me and believe me, I value the trust you put into me. I was in you and I was inside of you and you welcomed me and for that I thank you.

You could have warned me that you might ruin the sheets, yanno. No, you didn’t tell me that you were a squirter. I had to suppress a laugh. I’m really a 12 year old boy inside. Ignore me.

Nicole, I don’t want you seeing anyone else. I know that I can’t make you do that, not just yet. We’re building, still, and working up towards that. I’m just making it known that I want your attention, undivided and complete. I will be giving you mine because…shit… the way you moaned my name over and over, when your eyes rolled back into your head, and the scratches you left on my sides… yeah. I’m sold. I was already completely taken by your personality and our budding friendship, but that pussy is amazing. GODDAMMIT!

Ok.

I’m gonna chill.

I want it. I want to own it and you.

-David

11/2/2010 3:49 a.m.

From: "Nicole White"

To: "David E. Woods"

Subj: Re: Sleepless…

You do. Already.

****

2/14/11

8:35 pm

So how does it feel to be officially in training?

It feels good. It feels right.

Are you wearing your training collar?

Not at the moment. It’s still in the box You gave to me earlier at dinner.

Put it on.

Ok, BRB.

Back.

Welcome.

Thank You, Sir :-)

Do you believe in me?

Yes, Sir, I do.

Do you believe in us?

I do. If You don’t mind explaining, why do You ask, Sir?

Because I want to make sure that you’re as fully prepared for what we’re about to get into together as I am. I want this. I need this. You do too.

You know I do.

So I want to make sure that you’re not walking into this lightly.

Sir, I need you to understand that I get it. You know this. It’s not my first time…This Life… it is essential to me. This is what I’m built for, what feels right for me. I’ve missed this type of connection.

But it is mine!

I know…

Respect that.

I do.

I’m trying to do this the right way. I want to make sure that we are both fulfilled and that I can take care of you. Of us.

I know, Sir.

Every day, my feelings for you grow stronger and stronger. Today, we took a step towards the life we both want to live, a life we both say we need.

And we will do so and it will be amazing. I trust in You as You trust in me. Sir, we’re going to be fine. I’m going to learn everything I need to know to serve You, fully and completely. I’m committing myself to You. Don’t fear me, please…

I don’t fear you, my Star. I fear failing you as your Sir.

You will not fail me. Sir, You love me.

Says who? ;)

Says You, earlier today, when You gave me my beautiful new training collar.

Touch it.

I’m there.

You are.

I will always be there.

You will.

And you’ll be on your knees waiting for me.

As you wish.

Go to bed, Star.

Goodnight, Sir.

David’s Status Message: My Bitch-to-be lol

I love you, David.

I know.

*****

2/14/2013

Nicole blinked a few times to focus, but the lights above her were painfully blinding. They hurt. She closed them again. She focused on listening closely for cues, maybe hearing sounds could help her figure out where she was. She could hear a familiar voice singing and she thought she knew the song, but wasn’t sure. The voice she knew though. She tried to smile, but her lips felt sore and cracked.
I need my lip butter
, she thought.

“Until the end of time, I’ll be there for you… you own my heart my heart and mind, I truly adore you…”
the voice sang and she felt herself warming up. She’d heard that line sung to her several times before, so she felt at least that wherever she was, she was with someone she knew and someone who made her feel good. She licked her lips and smiled.

“Marcus…” she whispered.

She wasn’t sure if he heard her or not. She hadn’t heard herself so she tried again.

“Marcus!” she yelled, or at least she felt like she yelled.

“I need your help!!” Still, no response. She gave up. She took a few deep breaths and prepared to call out again when she heard voices getting closer. Two men it sounded like. They weren’t happy. Maybe they were arguing.
Well whoever it is, somebody better come get me up outta here and get me my lip butter,
she thought to herself.

“Why the fuck are you in here? Today of all days?” David accused Marcus. “How many times do I have to tell you to stay far away from Nicole as possible?? Huh?? It’s been weeks and you’re
still
not welcomed here!”

“Look, man,” Marcus began, “I just wanted to come by and check on her, OK?” Marcus stood still, annoyed that David interrupted his singing. “It’s Valentine’s Day, man, have a heart.”

“I have a heart, you piece of shit, and she is lying there, unconscious on that bed, because of you and your bullshit. Not a day has gone by when I haven’t wanted to rip you apart, limb by limb, hair by hair, and cell by fucking cell!” David hissed.

“Whatever, you ain’t gonna do shit. I came here to see Nicole, not you,” Marcus continued, moving closer to Nicole’s bed. He carried flowers, so he sat the vase down on the night stand beside her and stood calmly by her bedside. “Just give me a minute, man, damn. You don’t think I feel terrible about this??”

“You should feel suicidal. Would save me the trouble,” David retorted, without taking a step. Something caught His eye and He thought He saw movement come from Nicole’s still body. He rushed to the other side of the bed.

“Baby? Baby are you awake?” He grabbed her hand and began massaging it, as He had done countless times in the past weeks, waiting for some sign of life.

“Baby please, please say something, anything. Just grab my hand if you can,” He begged.

Nicole squeezed His hand.

“She just squeezed my hand!! Call the nurse, get the doctor in here!! Now!” He yelled at Marcus. Marcus ran out of the room in search for help.

Nicole opened her eyes again, this time feeling better adjusted. She watched as Marcus left the room and tried to call out to him.

“Marcus!!” she yelled.
Where is he going?

David looked down at Nicole. He stood for a moment.

“Star?”

Nicole tried to move her heard towards the direction she saw Marcus leaving.

“Star??” David asked again. He grabbed her hand and pulled it to His chest. He caressed her face as tears burned his eyes and threatened to spill over. “Baby, it’s me. I’m here,” He whispered.

Nicole slowly moved her head towards the man holding her hand and touching her face. She stared into attractive, but sad eyes. She felt something, but she wasn’t sure what it was, but her stomach fluttered a bit. She blinked a few times, but couldn’t place him.

Who is Star?

“So what do you think? You think you’re up to going out to a party?”

Nicole looked up from her computer screen and focused on Marcus, who was sitting on the couch flipping through the television stations. She had a headache, something she had gotten used to over the last three months. Almost every day, in the late evening, she developed a dull, but thumping headache behind her left eye and near her left temple. She usually popped a few Advil and it would subside. This evening, she was so focused on her writing that she barely noticed how fast it crept up on her. She was writing another journal entry on her tablet. Her neurologist suggested that she keep a journal when thoughts came to her, thoughts that might be memories she struggled with understanding. She typed faster than she wrote, so she kept the entries in her tablet, which was password protected: 
0214
. She wasn’t sure why she chose that number, but it just came to her so she rolled with it. She looked back at her screen.