Quirks & Kinks (23 page)

“No,” she agreed. “Women love the innuendo. We love your big, thick cocks and thinking about you using them.”

Andddd I was starting to get hard.

Fuck.

“But we think about dicks when we want to think about dicks. We eat ice cream, we’re thinking about the taste, the calories, and how many more servings we can have without wanting to slit our wrists when we pick up a women’s magazine. You watch us eat it, and you’ve got us pictured in a knob gobbler film reel.”

“Knob gobbler?”

“Don’t even pretend you don’t know what I mean.”

Busted. I was picturing myself picturing knob gobbling. The male mind was a vicious circle of sex. How we’ve done it, how we want to do it, and the way she would contribute. Ways to make her want it, what we need to do to make it happen, and after we’ve had it, how to make it happen again.

Biology at its finest.

I angled my head in concession.

“Now get out.” She shoved me playfully to the other side of the curtain. “Thanks for unzipping me, but I need another option and you must be my errand boy. I didn’t sign on for wetsuit shopping all day.”

Turning to pick out another suit and smiling as I did, I found Jimmy leaning on the rack closest to the room. His elbow was supporting some of his weight by leaning on top, and the fingers of his other hand were laced carelessly with their dangling counterparts.

And his tired blue eyes were positively dancing. “You hooked yourself a feisty one, huh?”

“You have no idea, Jimmy.” I shook my head once again and pulled a bigger size off the rack. “You have no idea.”

“Hold tight and don’t fuck it up.”

My eyes shot back to his.

“I won’t,” I promised even though I wasn’t so sure it was true.

“You will,” he disagreed, rocking his head back and forth like a man who knew. “We always do.”

“IS LEARNING TO BREATHE
saltwater one of the skills of surfing I’ll acquire over time?” Easie asked as we drove back toward downtown Los Angeles and my apartment.

Her golden hair reflected a sparkle of dwindling sunlight, and her blue eyes rolled back into the comfort of her resting head.

Splaying my hand on the warm skin of her sun-kissed thigh, I answered truthfully. “I don’t think so.”

Her eyes popped open and pointed their power directly at me. “I don’t think I’m ever going to be good at it then.”

“Ah, but see. You
will
acquire the skill to not be in a situation where you
need
to breathe water. That’s the key.”

She’d done well, finally getting up and staying up for a solid ten seconds on a baby wave about halfway through our day. After that, she’d gotten tired, wiping out time after time until her resolve wore thin, scoured away by the sand of the unforgiving sea floor. Settling onto a towel, and sprawling out into one of the most attractive beach bunnies I’d ever seen, she watched me ride wave after wave for the rest of the day.

I’d felt bad keeping her there so long, and yet, I literally couldn’t find the strength within me to give in to the temptation to leave.

It might be fucked up, but my sense of loyalty was rooted in Evan so deep I didn’t know if I could change it no matter how bad I wanted to. And that scared me more about my relationship with Easie than anything else.

Maybe I wouldn’t be able to give her the time and priority she so desperately deserved.

“I’m not sure I believe you,” she disagreed. “I’m thinking a few more waves will work me over before I get to that point, and I’m not sure how much more of that I can take.”

“You don’t like the motion of the ocean?”

“Fuck your cuteness. I hurt.”

“Aww,” I cooed. “Poor baby. I’ll rub you and make it feel better.”

“You’re going to have to rub it for a long time.”

I winked and squeezed her flesh into the palm of my hand. “I’ll rub it as long as you want, baby.”

Muttering under her breath, she blustered with false disdain. “Sex fiend.”

“Sex? Whatever do you mean, sweet Easie?” I asked, obviously faking my innocence. “Who’s the dirty minded one now?”

“You’re telling me you were referring strictly to a back rub?”

“Of course,” I lied. “You mucked that one up all on your own.”

“Hah,” she scoffed. “Not likely.”

I pulled into the first open spot I saw on my block, shifted into neutral and put on the parking brake.

Easie attempted to make a move to climb out, but all that happened was a long-suffering moan.

“Sore, huh?” I asked with a chuckle, kicking open my door, climbing out, slamming it shut, and rounding my hood to help her with the difficult journey from the seat to the sidewalk.

Easing her way by opening her door and lifting most of her weight, I was taken off guard when she looked up at me with unhappy eyes.

“I’ll meet you up there.”

“Why?” I asked, pretty well aware that she didn’t want to tell me. Like most people, I was a glutton for punishment, demanding to know anyway.

But she wasn’t one to bury the lead once the ball was in motion. “I need to smoke a cigarette.”

God.

Turns out we’d both accomplished something today. She’d gone this long without smoking, and I’d managed the same amount of time without thinking about it.

Of course, all good things must come to an end.

“Right.”

I truly didn’t mean to, but even I could hear the colder turn of my voice.

“Fuck,” she muttered, reaching into her bag and pulling out a cigarette. The issue of her smoking was stressing her out enough to make her need to smoke that much more. Even I couldn’t miss the comedic irony in that.

Pushing her cigarette to the side gently before she could light it, I pulled her body to mine and pressed my lips to the warm, soft skin behind her ear. “I’ll meet you upstairs. I know I’m struggling with it now, but I promise I’ll find a way to deal with it.”

“Why is it so important to you?” she asked, wrapping her tiny arms around me and holding me back.

Panicked melancholy leeched instantly into my veins, clenching my teeth and eyes tight out of reflex. It was on the tip of my tongue to tell her—to open up the ugly box that had shaped me—when my phone rang obnoxiously from the pocket of my shorts.

Pulling back, I apologized with my eyes, but a part of me couldn’t help but feel relieved.

Ultimately, there’d come a time when she would expect me to make a choice between her and Evan. And, no matter who I chose, I doubted I would make the right one.

In this hazy, undecided, unacknowledged place, I could hold onto the past and reach for the future at the same time.

“Hello?” I said, putting the phone to my ear without reading the caller ID.

“Hi, honey,” my mom said in my ear, her voice the hollow echo of its former self like always.

“Hi, Mom,” I greeted back, pointing to the phone and then up to the window of my apartment.

Easie’s eyes shuttered with obvious disappointment.

I knew the half-hearted apology in mine was shallow at best, but it was all I could manage. And I hated myself for it. This was why I’d tried so hard to resist her.

She just turned out to be irresistible.

Leaving her behind to go into the building, I tried to put her disappointment out of my mind and focused on the woman in my ear.

Pushing open the stairwell door, my steps echoed and bounced in the largely blank space.

“I haven’t heard from you in a while.”

“I know.”

“A long while,” she elaborated, making me stop climbing the stairs to close my eyes with guilt.

“I know, Mom. I’m sorry. I’ve been busy.” The words felt painfully hollow, no matter how true they were.

I could almost feel her shrewd eyes through the phone. “I know you’re busy. You’ve been busy for years now.”

“Mom—”

“Losing one son was devastating, Anderson. Losing two is nearly unbearable.”

“You haven’t lost me.” I was still very much breathing—living. I called her every week. She hadn’t lost me.

“I have.”

“Mom,” I cut in, bringing the front of my closed fist to my forehead. “This isn’t a good time for this. I’m sorry.”

“I know you are.” Her words were weighty.

“I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Okay,” she conceded, her voice sullen.

Gahhh. Bringing my fist forward and back a tapped a slow beat into my pulsing forehead.

“I love you.”

“I know that too, Anderson.”

The phone clicked in my ear, and I pulled it away to check that the call had fully dropped.

Turning to the wall, I leaned my head into the cool cinderblocks and splayed my hands out at its side.

“Frustrating conversation?” Easie’s voice echoed, surprising me enough to make me whip around to face her.

“Uh,” I stuttered before giving her an honest answer. I rubbed the back of my neck and then ruffled my hair at the top of it. “It’s complicated.”

She just nodded, her face serious but not hostile.

For that I was grateful. I didn’t want to argue with her. I didn’t want to get into a deep conversation that was bound to end in tears and heartbreak.

I just wanted a night with her. Just one night to let my body get to know hers and memorize it for the rest of time without thinking about any of the other stuff.

At least I’d be able to picture her every feature when my stupidity finally caught up with me.

“You ready to go upstairs?”

She looked to me and then back to the door. Indecision contorted the line of her brow and disfigured the normally pleasant line of her pretty face. Maybe living a block away from one another wasn’t such a good thing. It gave her a way to run away.

“Are you sure you want me to come up?”

Practically jumping down the five steps that separated us, I grabbed her hips and pulled her body into mine before grabbing her jaw with my palms.

“Yes. God, Easie, I can’t think of anything else I want more.”

Soft, golden skin and rich minty lips mesmerized me, and the apple of her skin completely camouflaged any smokey stench. She smelled edible and ripe, and I couldn’t wait to get my mouth all over her.

“Easie,” I groaned, giving into the temptation and sinking my lips deep into the plump flesh of her skin. It gave way to their touch, molding to the shape of my mouth and reddening under the suction it produced. Her nails scratched at my back, and her body finally relaxed and gave way to the moment. All the tension of our differences, the pressure of my sense of obligation, the dispute about her smoking—all of it vanished and morphed, serving as an ignition point for all of our untapped chemistry.

I’d never felt this in tune with a person physically, her bobs timed to my weaves and willing flesh offering itself innately to its searching counterpart.

Her gasps and moans echoed in the stairwell, vibrating through my body like a sixth and extra sense when we got in the way of their percussive travels.

But I couldn’t explore the way I wanted, and Easie deserved better than a cold, concrete wall behind her back.

Eager hands ran down the line of her back to her ass, cupping the cheeks and lifting without her permission or preparation.

Her answering gasp invited my tongue into her mouth, and I made use of it, plundering its bounty and exploring each nuance and taste individually. There was something special about her tongue and mine together, like they held the power to conduct a wave of electricity back and forth in a way I’d never experienced.

Each stair felt like a mile as I climbed with her in my arms, the weight of her petite body nothing compared to the heavy load of my anticipation.

I hadn’t had sex in years, but my dick remembered the ride as though it was a bicycle, turning to granite and making the rub of friction carrying her created that much more torturous.

Her ankles crossed behind me, and the heels of each of her feet dug deliciously into my ass. I welcomed her enthusiasm, watching my step as I walked but opening my neck up to her ministrations as I did. Each lick of her tongue and bite of her teeth had me moving faster, forcing our way through the stairwell door of my floor with the extension of one, single hand.

She never paused or faltered, sucking at the lobe of my ear and whispering direction into it. “I can’t wait to feel you inside me.”

I nearly crumbled to my knees right then, but pushed on, knowing that the real relief would come from the inside of my apartment and getting there took a heady mixture of a key, concentration, and luck.

All three came together better than expected, and the freedom of being inside my home was liberating. No longer on the hook for her safety and virtue, I dove in with equal fervor, forcing her head to the side and working my lips down the line of her neck, around the curve of her collarbone, and into the neck of her scooped tank top. Each swell deserved its own attention, and I gave it, working from the base of one, up the peak, down the valley, and up again all before she could even get her hand in my hair and a moan out of her throat.

Walls yielded and braced as we bumped our way down the hall to my room, her legs wrapped around me tighter and tighter like a slowly cinching belt. I would have thought they’d get tired, but instead they worked harder, trying to force our bodies into one despite the barrier of our clothing.