Rachel's Redemption (15 page)

Chapter 22

Rachel had everything planned to the tee. There was nothing left to do but wait. Tomorrow the gymnasium would fill with people from all over Redemption and several counties over, all there to honor Gloria Rose Delaney-Tolbert.

And Rachel couldn’t be sadder.

She hadn’t heard from Logan since the day of their motorcycle ride. She’d left his house late and driven all the way to Denver so she could be to work the following morning. That was two weeks ago.

Two weeks during which she’d been completely unhindered in the final planning.

She’d met with Lila Pitts for a final tasting of the menu, and, she had to admit, Lila had outdone herself. She’d met with Alexander and he’d truly outdone himself. The flowers he’d chosen were magical and absolutely perfect. Then she’d met with the party supply store and okay’d the linens, tables chairs and even the stage. She’d seen a sample of the favors—elegant; tasted the cake—delicious; and met with the band. It was all going to be perfect.

But, in her heart, it wasn’t right.

Nana would have loved it. There was no doubt about that. But, something was missing.

Logan.

He’d been with her, well against her, every step of the way. Right up until the end. And, now that the big day was before them, she missed him and she wanted him here, with her, by her side.

This was new territory for her. She’d been an independent woman for so long, the idea that she wanted to share something as important as this event with someone was foreign to her. But, here she was, standing in the empty gym, where in less than twenty four hours hundreds of guests would gather, and all she could think about was Logan.

His revelation about that night at the gas station had been a big one. Sure, she remembered that night, but not in the condemning way he did. That had been one in a long chain of events that had shaped him, molded him in to who he was and what did that say about her? She’d left that night wanting to fix him, make it better. Maybe that evening had been more formative for her than she thought. Maybe it had played a part in her wanting to be a pediatrician. She’d always wanted to be a doctor, but maybe that night had been the catalyst that had pushed her to desire caring for children and teens. The look in his eyes, the combination of pride and bravery and utter vulnerability had hit a nerve with her. It’d been then that the idea had grown that she’d wanted to be an advocate for kids, for the ones that needed one. She wanted to support them, to help them, nurture and care for them.

She had Logan and Mean Gene to thank for that, just as much as she had Nana to thank.

It’s never one person that shapes a person. It’s so many things. And, now, she realized, for her, it had been Logan, all those years ago.

Logan who now held a part of her. She didn’t know exactly when she’d entrusted him with her heart, only that somewhere along the way she had.

And she wanted him here, with her, tonight before the event, tomorrow at the event and after. Whatever after looked like.

The clinic hadn’t been happy she’d been doing so much commuting. Not that it had been anyone’s business but hers. Still it hadn’t stopped her supervisor from mentioning it to her. They’d seen the lines of fatigue and of course noticed the Friday’s she’d left a little early and the Monday’s she’d arrived a little late, bleary-eyed.

Going into this event, she never would have thought she’d relish the time she spent in Redemption. Sure it’d been her home, but that was with Nana. With Nana gone, she no longer saw it that way.

Until now. And, honestly, for the past few weeks.

She’d enjoyed driving down Main and waving to people who knew her and were happy to see her: Lila, Alexander, Trisha, Charlie, Molly.

And, most of all, she’d wanted to see Logan again.

She’d missed him these past few weeks. More than she’d missed anybody. Even after she’d broken it off with Travis, she hadn’t hurt like this. It was as if part of her was left behind and she knew where to look but couldn’t get there.

They say home is where the heart is. If that was true, then her home was in Redemption and somewhere on that country road in an old abandoned barn, because that’s where she’d last opened up her heart.

Chapter 23

Rachel stood on the precipice of the gym entrance, wearing her black dress, which miraculously fit. Amazing what a little heartbreak could do for a figure.

Rachel searched for Logan, hoping he’d be here, but knowing he wouldn’t.

She swallowed the emotion gathering in her throat. She was going to be all smiles and broad appreciation tonight: for all the people that helped to make this event a success and to all the people in attendance here to honor Gloria Rose.

Rachel shook her head, clearing the images of the one person who’d both hindered and, ultimately, made this event possible. The curls she’d carefully made in her hair moved over her shoulders and along her face. Molly had insisted that she wear her hair down and Rachel had agreed, although she hadn’t much cared either way. The one person that mattered wasn’t likely to be there, to notice. It’d no doubt get in the way, but she wasn’t going to argue with Molly, particularly when it came to fashion.

“Congratulations, Rachel. Your grandmother would be proud.”

Rachel turned at the voice of the town council president. “Thank you. I think so, too.” He introduced her to his wife and then they proceeded into the gym, along with several other couples just arriving.

Drawing in a deep breath and giving herself a mental pep talk, Rachel followed the crowd into the gym.

The room took her breath away. It sparkled, literally glowed. The decorators had hung long chandeliers with candles and draping flowers from the ceiling. The lights were lowered so that the candles twinkled as did the thousands of white tea lights scattered around the room. Alexander’s floral arrangements were magnificent, the perfect blend of color and white, greenery and jewels to make them pop and glitter.

The band had set up at one end of the gym and was playing instrumentals as people filed in and found their place cards. And, just in front of the band was the stage, set up like a runway.

“It’s gorgeous, Rach!” Molly said from behind her, swinging an arm around her bare shoulders.

Rachel leaned into her friend. “Yes. It really turned out.” Almost perfect, but not quite.

“Hey, friend.” Molly steered Rachel away from the crowd. “What is it? No, wait.” Molly looked past Rachel’s shoulder, going up on tiptoes to peer around. Then she turned back to Rachel, frowning. “Not what, whom? Am I right?”

Rachel shook her head. “It’s nothing. I’m fine.”

Molly studied her friend and nodded. “I know you are faking ‘fine’, but in that dress, girl, you look a-maz-ing.”

Rachel laughed and cast a downward glance at herself. “Yeah, I have this
a-maz-ing
friend who knows clothes.”

Molly winked. “Yeah, well, we can’t all be famous physicians.”

Rachel looped her arms around her best friend and squeezed. “Thanks, Molly. Love you.”

Molly slipped away and waved a hand in front of her face. “Hey, now. No tears. I didn’t do waterproof tonight. Should have. But didn’t. No tears.” She shook a friendly finger at Rachel.

Rachel nodded, smiling. “No tears.” Although that was going to be really hard when she got up on stage to say a few words and thank everyone for coming.

Molly left her to find her seat. Rachel watched her slip through the crowd. She spotted Trisha and Charlie. Kelly was with them and she had her arm looped through the arm of a tall man Rachel didn’t know. Rachel smiled at Mr. and Mrs. Wing and waved to Heather and her husband. She saw Lila talking to some of her staff; they’d be serving guests as soon as everyone was seated. And, she saw Alexander leaning into a very handsome man who was laughing at something Alexander had just said.

Behind them, Rachel saw Sasha and Kiki, Megs and Tilly arrive. They had on their coats and heels. They moved to the doors leading to the locker room. Sasha saw Rachel and gave her a big wave. Rachel smiled and waved back. Logan was going to miss their performance.

A waiter passed with a tray of drinks and Rachel reached for one. A little liquid courage. Alexander made his way through the crowd to her.

“Ms. Rachel, you have outdone yourself.”

Rachel smiled. “I was going to say the same thing to you!”

“I want you to meet my friend, Michael Conners. Michael, this is Rachel Delaney-Tolbert.”

Rachel extended her hand, which Michael ignored. He leaned in and kissed her cheek instead. Rachel welcomed the embrace. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

“Likewise.” Michael looked around, people were taking their seats. “It’s about time.”

Rachel’s stomach swooped, but she nodded. “I think you are right. Okay, here I go.”

Alexander leaned in and kissed her cheek. Then he said into her ear, “You are a magnificent woman. Give him time. He’s too smart to let you go.”

Then he disappeared through the crowd with Michael leading the way.

Rachel swallowed her champagne and set it on a table as she made her way to the stage.

The band finished the song and let the silence announce Rachel. She made her way to the center of the stage and accepted the microphone the bandleader handed her. Then she turned toward the seated guests.

It felt like thousands of eyes were on her, but all she could picture was her Nana. She felt her presence and she smiled, even as the tears threatened. She took a deep fortifying breath and began.

“Hello.” She thanked everyone for coming, for turning out to show their respect and love for the woman who’d held this town so dear. She thanked the town council for allowing her to realize this dream. Then she thanked all of the vendors who’d made the event possible. Lastly, she thanked Logan. “He wasn’t able to be here tonight.” She paused. “I’m sure he’s strategizing next week’s game plan.” The guests all chuckled. “But, without him, tonight, this event wouldn’t be.” Then she issued a last thank you. The crowd applauded and some people even stood.

Logan stood outside the gym and listened to Rachel’s speech. He was so damned proud of her. She was a force to be reckoned with. She’d had a goal and she hadn’t let anything get in her way. Despite everything he’d pushed in front of her, she’d made the best of it and come out on top. Then she’d gone and publicly thanked him and he felt like an ass. His damn pride had kept him away—from her, from this event.

He shook his head. He was dressed for the event, but he couldn’t make himself go in. Nah, he’d done enough. This was her night. He wasn’t going to be a black spot on that memory.

Logan turned and left through a side door.

Chapter 24

It was time for Rachel to leave. She’d come to Redemption to pay her final respects to Nana. Now that that was done—and in a way truly befitting Nana—it was time for Rachel to get back to Denver, back her job, back to her life.

She was ready. Mostly. Although it did feel an awful lot like she was leaving behind something very special.

She shook those thoughts away. He hadn’t bothered to come; he hadn’t tried to contact her. Nothing. Clearly any feelings were entirely one-sided—hers.

Rachel walked down the steps from the motel office. She’d paid her bill and thanked the owners, not only for coming last night, but for putting up with her all month. She’d woken early and packed her car. She’d said good-bye to Molly last night. They’d both cried, but since the evening’s event was over, it hadn’t mattered that they both had mascara tracks down their faces.

She’d hugged and kissed and thanked Lila and Alexander and even Sasha and Kiki. The event had been a success and it was largely due to them. Rachel promised to stay in touch and to visit and to let her know where she ended up finishing her fellowship.

Rachel climbed into her car and drove out of the parking lot. She waved at people on the sidewalk as she left, lifted her hand at drivers in cars as she passed them on her way out of town. It was only a few turns before she was on the interstate, heading west, back to her life.

Logan sat in his coach’s office, the X’s and O’s in front of him blurring.

Every time he tried to focus, he saw Rachel in that sexy black dress she’d fretted over fitting into, soaked through in her tootsie roll T-shirt, or naked.

He pushed back from his desk and dropped his head back on his chair. He pinched the bridge of his nose. Maybe one day he’d get the thoughts of her out of his mind. But that wasn’t today.

It certainly hadn’t been after the party, either.

Although God knows he tried. He’d left, driven back to his house, stripped out of his monkey suit and hit the street. He’d run for well over an hour, until he was good and sweaty, then he’d put himself through a grueling weight routine. He’d dragged himself to the shower and all his running and lifting were for naught? Because memory of that woman was all over that shower. If he ever hoped to use it again without thinking of her, he’d have to demolish it and start over.

So, he’d hauled his sweaty ass to bed, collapsing in a heap of fatigued muscles and slept, not well, not like he had before Rachel, but he’d closed his eyes.

Now he was working on the playbook for Friday and all he could see was her.

What was wrong with him? Why couldn’t he be honest with himself? In every other part of his life, he was full-on, full-in. But when it came to Rachel . . . well, he just wasn’t.

He wasn’t sure who he was anymore. He’d lived so long believing he was just the poor kid, someone to feel sorry for, to pity, that he’d believed it. He’d owned it, became it.

He scrubbed his hands over his eyes then through his hair. He rubbed at his whisker-covered jaw.

He really owed Rachel thanks. Because, without that belief would he have driven himself so hard to be the success he’d turned out to be? Maybe Nana had worked her magic on him, too.

He needed to find Rachel.

He didn’t want a life without her. What was life for if not to spend it with someone? And, shouldn’t that someone be the one person in the world that gets you? That understands you? That loves you?

God, did she love him? Could she after all he’d done?

Said?

Did he love her?

He sat up, his legs hitting the floor.

Yes. Hell, yes! He loved her. Loved everything about Rachel Delany-Tolbert.

Renewed purpose and energy flowed through Logan. He looked around his office. Charlie could take over. He could lead this team and he’d do a great job. Even Tom was turning out to be a decent coach, although he had a ways to go.

Logan needed to be with Rachel. Where? He wasn’t sure, but as long as he was with her, if he could convince her to forgive him, he’d be a very happy man.

But only if she’d have him.

That was something he needed to find out. He glanced at the clock. He didn’t know how long she planned on sticking around after the event. He couldn’t afford to wait around. He grabbed his keys and headed to the motel.

The motel lot was full of cars, people who’d driven in for the tribute. He scanned the lot. But no blue Volvo. He punched the steering wheel. Had he missed her? Wait, maybe she was just out, getting breakfast, maybe. He threw the truck in park and raced up to the motel office.

“Hey, Coach. Great game last night! Didn’t see you at the event? It sure was something.”

“Yeah, thanks, that’s what I heard. So hey has Rachel checked out yet.

The clerk frowned. “Sure has.” She looked at her watch. “About two hours ago.”

Logan resisted the urge to howl. Two hours and she’d be well on her way to Denver. No problem. He’d just head to Denver.

“Thanks!” He flew out of the office and down the steps. He put the truck in gear and drove out onto Main.

Maybe Rachel was at Molly’s. Didn’t it usually take women a while to say goodbye? It was worth a chance.

Redemption was busy this Saturday morning and he had to wait behind several cars as he slowly made his way to Molly’s store. Of course there wasn’t any parking in front, so he swung around to the alley to park. The whole time he was on the hunt for Rachel’s car.

He jogged around to the front of the shop, nodding and accepting congratulations from people along the way. Logan ignored their strange looks and concern when he didn’t stop to talk plays. He was on a mission. He had to find the woman he loved.

He yanked open the store’s glass door. Loud classical music rained down on him. He stepped inside and called Rachel’s name. He strode toward he back, where he’d seen her that day, popping out of the dressing room. The drapes were pulled on one of them and his heart surged with hope that Rachel was behind them.

Molly emerged from the back storeroom. “Hey, Logan.”

She frowned. “Everything okay?” As she walked toward him, she stopped and adjusted the dressing room curtain, pulling it open and tying it back. The dressing room was empty. The store was empty. Just him and Molly.

Logan shook his head. The steam that had propelled him from his office, to the motel, and now to Molly’s was fading. Rachel wasn’t here; she was at least two hours gone, on the road back to the life she wanted. Far from Redemption and him.

Logan backed away from Molly and slumped onto the antique sofa. He dropped his head into this hands. “She’s gone.”

“Yeah.” Molly sighed, sitting in the chair adjacent to the sofa.

“Is she going back to Denver?”

“I think so. She didn’t say for sure, but yeah, I think so.”

Logan needed a plan. This was just a momentary set back, not insurmountable. Should he head to Denver? Call her? Get flowers then call her? Charter a plane?

“Logan.” Molly interrupted his thoughts. “I need to run across the street.” She patted his knee. “Don’t take this the wrong way,” she said, eyeing him critically, “but you don’t look so good. Do you want me to get you anything?”

Logan shook his head.

“Okay. Be back in a sec.”

The classical music barely registered as Molly left. He’d missed Rachel. He’d lost her. And, he loved her. He loved Rachel Delaney-Tolbert. A part of him probably always had, which was why it was hurting so bad—why he’d lashed out so hard—when she’d seen him at his weakest.

Why hadn’t he told her sooner? Why had he avoided her after that day at the barn? Because he was scared, that’s why. He’d never been so scared. He’d been forced to face the truth about himself and about her. He’d been forced to let go of some pretty tightly held beliefs.

But, he’d emerged on the other side better for it.

More alive.

And, in love.

Well, forget this moping shit. He’d never backed away from what he’d wanted in his life and wasn’t about to start now. He’d find her. He had her phone number and he knew where she lived—which city anyways. Denver was huge, but it wouldn’t be impossible to find her. He’d find her and when he did, he’d find a way to get her to listen to him. He’d apologize and he’d tell her how he felt. And, then . . . then he hoped she felt the same way. But that was only if he found her.

He knuckled the cobwebs out of his eyes as “Beethoven’s 5
th”
announced a customer.

Since he felt like hell and he really didn’t want to talk football, last night’s game, next week’s game or anything related to either, he kept his head down and said, “Molly’s across the street. She said she’ll be back in a minute.”

“I didn’t come back for Molly.”

Logan’s head shot up. He blinked then refocused.

Rachel stood before him, the early afternoon sun shrouding her in light, like the angel she was. His angel. She’d always been watching out for him. And, she was here.

He rose but he couldn’t make his legs move. He wanted to scoop her up, hold her, keep her from getting away. But he was frozen. He didn’t want to scare her or do anything too fast. She was here and at that moment that’s all that mattered. She was here.

“Hey, Coach.”

Her eyes were red and puffy, her skin was blotchy. She was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“I don’t want to leave.”

“Okay.” His heartbeat kicked up. That had to be a good thing, right? The urge to hold her was almost more than he could bear.

She stepped forward. Her eyes never left his. She continued forward until she stood directly in front of him, inches separating them.

“I love you. I know who I am and who I want to be. I know
where
I want to be.” She reached out and placed a shaky hand in the center of his chest. It sent heat through to his heart and he nearly died from it. God, he’d missed her. “And, I know who I want to be with.”

She stood on tiptoe, putting them pretty close to eye to eye. “I love you with all that I am. I
love
you.”

He continued to stare at her. Was she saying what he thought she was? Was he hearing her right? He moved his tentative hands to her narrow waist and gave in to the need that had gripped him the moment she’d walked back into his life. He lifted her up, holding her tight against his chest.

“Okay,” he said.

“Okay?” Her eyes glittered.

He laughed then, throwing his head back and letting the deep ruffle of his laughter fill the room and vibrate against her chest. He spun in a tight circle, holding Rachel close. She laughed, too, the lighter sound of her joy dancing with his.

Logan shook his head. What would he do with a lifetime of her, all to himself? All his. Forever. He couldn’t wait to find out. “I came here. To find you. I messed up, Rachel. I did it all wrong, but I just . . . I just had to figure it out. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you, for the event. I’m sorry.

She shook her head, her green eyes shiny and bright.

“I was at the high school and it all suddenly made sense. I get it.” He squeezed her tighter to him. “I get it! I’m going to tell the AD he needs a new coach.”

The smile fell from Rachel’s face. “What? Why? Where are you going?”

“Wherever you go, babe. Wherever you go.”

Tears spilled and tumbled down her cheeks. “You can’t leave.” She sniffed and said in a watery voice, “We can’t leave.”

Logan felt a tremendous weight lift and he hoisted Rachel higher into his arms. Then he kissed her full on the mouth. He meant for it to be a stamp, she was his, and he was hers. A seal. But it quickly turned into a needy, wet tangle of lips and teeth, his tongue dancing with hers.

At last he stepped back and said, “I’m so glad you just said that.”

He kissed her again until he couldn’t breathe. If they kept it up they were going to need a room. Then he stopped and sat her down, holding her face between his palms. “What about your fellowship?”

“Well . . . I made a few phone calls.”

“You can’t give up anything for me, Rachel.”

She smiled, the most beautiful, content smile he’d ever seen. “Of course not. I love you, but I am going to be a pediatrician. Just not in Denver. Not now anyways. And, not in Redemption either. They don’t have an opening right now, but Dixon does. So just a short drive . . . nothing like driving back and forth to Denver. It’s all settled. I called them on my way back. Actually, I’d started checking into it a few weeks ago . . .”

“‘Weeks ago’?”

She looked shy. “Yeah, I was thinking I really liked being back home, the people, Molly . . . you.”

“You,” he said and kissed her again. “I’ll go where you go.” He held her close, enjoying the feeling of her warm body against his. “Just promise not to leave without me.”