Radioactive (13 page)

“For both sides to just shake hands without any confidence in the other group would be meaningless,” I agree with him. “But it is by no means a bad approach to react differently than the Northern Legion did. They beat back the attacks of the outcasts by force and so forced the rebels to continue to defend and fight for their lives. There were only two possible outcomes: Either the outcasts would die or the Legion would die. But it does not have to be this way. We can work together. If the outcasts would see that they are no longer at risk to be attacked by the Legion, they would have no reason to continue attacking us.”

Although A233 was on my side, she shakes her head vehemently now. “Too much has happened. For a long time there was peace between the outcasts and the Legion. We let them live their lives as they wanted and still it was not enough for them. They insist on the disconnection of the electric wall and that’s impossible.”

“But they do not understand why the electric wall was created. When someone explains that as well as that radioactivity outside the zone remains, they would certainly not want to shut it down.”

A233 looks hesitantly to A350, but she shakes her head. What does this mean? Again it comes to a point where they’re not telling me something. What is it? Desperately I look to A566. Does he know? Would he tell me? But his face is like a mask. Unreadable.

I think of Gustav. He co-developed the experiment. He needs to know about the radioactivity. Why did he never mention it before? Is he intentionally in the dark about it? Does he want to make war on us? If only I could just talk to him about it.

Why does nobody answer me?

“Is the air and soil still contaminated by radioactivity or not?” I ask doubtfully into the room.

Amazingly, A489 is suddenly conciliatory. “We will perform radioactivity measurements and wait for the results before planning another attack.”

It’s not like him to take my side, even if it’s just for a test, why now? He wants to end the discussion and move on? What are they hiding from me?

A489 grants the senior doctor the floor.

“D577’s inclusion into the general population was successful. He is adapting well to his environment and performs the tasks assigned to him without resistance. He does not ask questions about his life or his past. Otherwise, no conspicuous behavior can be seen.”

Why does the doctor think that turning an otherwise sentient person into a robot is a success? One thing does surprise me; did Finn ever mention me to the doctors? He appeared very angry to see me recently. He did not want me near him and looked really sad. Why did he not complain about me? In his place, I would have. Maybe he is protecting me?

Only now do I realize that A350 is watching me. What does she expect to see in my face? A response to the mention of Finn?

“Is there any other news from the sickbay?” A350 now inquires. Does she want to find out if I was there again?

“The condition of the patients is considerably stable. We have had no incidents.”

So he calls someone almost losing their mind, like Zoe, considerably stable? He can hardly be serious.

“I’m sorry to disagree. I have observed several patients via the camera and they seemed to all be in an apathetic state. They lack human contact,” I interject angrily.

Surprisingly, even the doctor agrees. “Apathy cannot be dismissed out of hand. But there is a condition where the patient poses no threat to others...”

“...But only to themselves,” I finish his sentence. “An sickbay should be there to heal the people, not leave them to their illnesses.”

“The safety of the other residents is paramount. We cannot take the risk that a patient may injure other people,” the doctor defends himself.

“Not every patient is in the sickbay because they showed aggressive or violent behavior. Why are they being treated like criminals? What crime have they committed?”

Annoyed, A489 speaks. “Many of the patients spread lies and tried to create unrest in the other residents of the safety zone. It is our duty to protect the people.”

“People learn from their mistakes. The Legion has learned from the mistakes of our ancestors. That is why we are doing everything possible to avoid war. However, keeping people locked up in the sickbay because they disagree with us will not help us avoid another war. If we really want to believe in change, then we have to prove it.”

A350 nods approvingly. She liked my speech. I must admit, it was a smart move. If A489 speaks against me, he speaks against the principles of the Legion.

But instead, A350 responds. “I must agree with A518. She had suggested prior to the introduction of the common food distribution system that patients in the sickbay should take part, so as to enable reintegration. That proposal was rejected due to the high level of risk involved. But the new common food distribution system works fine. Therefore, I think it would be useful for the patients to now take part. Those who show themselves adaptable should not be excluded any longer.”

I cannot help but smile at her gratefully. Finally we’re back together. Finally she supports me again, just as she did since our first meeting. I was not aware of how much I value her opinions.

A233 also agrees. “An attempt is worth it. If we had fewer patients in the sickbay, we would have more fighters available for outside patrols.”

The opinion of A350 and A233 also seems to convince the others. Because all agree on the proposal, it does not even come to a vote. Even A489 does not complain, even though I’m sure he did not like the course the conference has taken because his arms are crossed over his chest angrily. I’m looking forward to seeing Zoe back in the safety zone, even if it is for a few minutes at a time, her contact with other people will certainly give her hope. After all, it will be the first time she has seen Finn in a long time. I just hope something triggers in him. Maybe he will feel his connection to her even without his memory.

As I sit in my room in the evening after dinner, I am alone for the first time in days. Although D560 lied to me, I now miss her presence. She never talked much, and yet I felt close to her. No matter what I told her, she seemed to understand. I cannot believe she did it just to sleep in my bed. I do not want to invite her in again. Not only would A350 not like it, I also need her support. I do not want to jeopardize it. In addition, I yearn more for someone else: Finn. When I think of the reunion between him and Zoe, I’m very nervous. My heart begins to race and my hands tremble. I am afraid that he will behave equally repellent toward her like he is with me. But at the same time, I’m afraid, what would trigger in me if he recognized her. I would not be jealous. On the contrary, I want only the best for him, but I am powerless against my feelings. I’ve always been and I guess that’s also in the nature of man.

Maybe it would help if I prepared her for her encounter with Finn. I could tell her what he told me about it. About what he missed and stories from their shared childhood. Whenever he spoke of her, his eyes lit up and a smile emerged from his otherwise tight-lipped mouth. She is his family and he hoped to see her again. Even if he does not remember her, at least it will make Zoe happy.

A566 would certainly help me again. He was the only one who was interested in how I felt. It’s unfair that I do not trust him further. Opposed to D560, he never lied to me. Even about her he told the truth. Partially anyway. He did warn me that she made up things.

I have to think back to the conference. A489 said that the camera was manipulated in the Northern Legion. That is exactly what A566 does. I realized it in the conference but did not think too much about it. There were too many updates to think too heavily on it. Could A566 be in contact with the rebels? Although they told me they do not have a spy among the Legion commanders, why else would A566 help me? In each vote he had been on my side. His proposal saved Finn’s life, and through him I was able to visit Finn and Zoe. I really owe him a lot. It is time that I tell him that. Of course it’s a bit stupid at the same time to also ask him a favor, but he seems to love the thrill of it.

Determined, I open the door of my room and follow the hall way to the end of the corridor. There is A566’s rom. Without hesitation, I knock and wait. Nothing happens. Maybe he did not hear me. I knock again, this time a little harder and longer. Still nothing. Irritated, I press my ear against the door and hold my breath. Nothing can be heard. The doors are thick, but I would have still heard a steam shower through them.

I decide to try one last time. “A566?” I call out softly through the closed door. No answer. He does not seem to be there.

I notice I am overcome with disappointment. Previously, he was there for me every night. Even if I did not come to him, he knocked on my door to check on me. I’ve taken his help almost for granted.

Actually, I should just stop running around the hallways and go to sleep, but I keep thinking about A566. Where is he right now? He loves the thrill of running around the safety zone that he did it even before I became a Legion commander. He falsified the cameras on several occasions. Why? What does he do that the other Legion commanders should not know?

My suspicion that he is connected to the rebels appears increasingly likely. Maybe he’s like Clyde who joined their cause without knowing it all. Clyde did it through Zoe’s words. But why would A566 join the rebels? He was always so proud of his classification. If the rebels took over, he would have no power. I do not understand him. He’s like a person behind fogged glass. You can see their outline, but not their whole self. I wish I could simply wipe away the fog and see who he really is.

Luckily I was able to convince A350 to let me attend the food distribution in the safety zone because I want to be there when Zoe and Finn meet each other for the first time. And if I stick to A350’s rules, that gives me exactly half an hour. They might soon grant me permission to use the elevator by myself.

As I enter the atrium of the safety zone, it is still quite empty and the food distribution windows are not yet open. But Zoe is already at the door to the sickbay with a guard. Unfortunately it is not Clyde since he has the night shift; he must use the day to sleep.

Immediately I rush toward Zoe and try not to show my joy. The security guard bows to me.

“I greet you, Legion commander A518.”

“I also greet you,” I reply and he straightens up. “I will take patient D523. You can devote yourself to another job.”

He nods and leaves the atrium toward the blue path, which leads to the rooms of the fighter units.

“I did not think that it would work so fast,” Zoe confesses with a grateful smile.

“Unfortunately, it is only for half an hour, but I’m working on getting you all back into the safety zone.”

We stop talking as we both are looking out for Finn, who has not surfaced. Suddenly Zoe’s warm hand is on my arm.

“I’m sorry that I yelled at you the other day. I’m sure you’ll do your best.”

I was really offended by her words that night, but to hear her apology brings me joy. “It’s okay,” I reply quickly because at this moment Finn walks into the atrium wearing his brown uniform.

“There he is,” I point in Finn’s direction. Although she is looking in his direction, she does not see him, confused forehead wrinkles appear on her forehead. “Where?”

“He just walked past the benches into the middle line,” I tell her, but in her eyes I notice it does not help. Desperate, she searches the lines for her brother. “They all look the same,” she blurts out, disappointed. “Why do you recognize him and I don’t? He’s my brother.”

Reassuringly I put a hand on her arm. “You have not seen him for a year and he has changed. The Legion adapted him to itself.”

“But he’s my brother. I should recognize him anyway. It is he who has lost his memory and not me.” She is full of rage against herself and I can understand that. It would kill me if I were no longer able to distinguish him from the others.

We stand right behind him in line. “That’s him,” I whisper to Zoe. She stares intently at his head, but shakes her head. “Are you sure?”

“Definitely,” I assure her, and in that moment Finn turns around questioningly. When he sees me, his eyebrows pull together angrily, but he does not say anything.

At the same time, Zoe’s face lights up. “You’re right, it is him. No one else can look that angry.”

Zoe’s words irritate Finn visibly. What’s that? Do you know me?” He looks at them suspiciously.

“I am your sister,” she says quietly but insistently to him. “Your little sister Zoe, do you remember?” She adds lovingly.

Finn shakes his head. “Did she tell you that?” He points at me. “Do not believe a word she says. She’s crazy.”

“No she is not. She is our friend. You can trust her. It will help us get out of here,” Zoe assured him. Finn snapped his breath in shock.

“Get out of here? Are you both mad? Anyone who leaves the safety zone dies. The soil is contaminated.”

Zoe shakes with a patient smile. “We were both born outside the safety zone. It’s not contaminated anymore. When I was a baby you used to hold me in your arms. You were still so small that you could hardly hold me.”

Her words do nothing but make Finn even angrier.

“Stop it. I do not want to hear anymore,” he utters angrily and turns his back to us.

His defensive attitude makes Zoe angry. She grabs Finn roughly by the shoulder and turns him around and looks him in the eye. “I do not care whether you want to hear it or not, but you are my brother. I will get you to remember even if I have to smack it into you.”

Startled, he throws her hand off his shoulder. “You’re crazy, that’s why you’re in the sickbay. They should never have let you out because that’s where you belong.”

I cannot believe Zoe’s lashing out. With all of my strength I drag her out of the line and away from Finn. “Chill out! If you behave conspicuously, they’ll never let you back in the safety zone!”

Outraged, she casts an angry glance in Finn’s direction. “He can’t have simply forgotten us!”

“He was operated on by the Legion. It’s not his fault!”