Reaching Rachel (22 page)

“Tell me about what to expect at the trial.”

Devin sighed. “Let’s hope that it never has to get to that point. Honestly.”

“If it does,” she continued. “I’m going to have to get in front of him and tell everyone in the court room what he did to me, right?”

He wished he could change this answer for her. “Yes.”

“And the defense will try to make it seem like I’m a lying, whoring bitch, right?” She didn’t look at him. She couldn’t.

When Devin didn’t answer, she looked at him out of the corner of her eye. He was gripping the steering wheel, his mouth a thin line. “Dev?”

“Don’t say that about yourself,” he gritted out. “They will try to trip you up, make you seem like you were confused, or you don’t remember what happened. What we need is either some other women to come forward, or that one in Alabama to wake up. As it is, they have enough on him to keep him for a good while. We want him in there for life, though, with no chance of parole. I don’t ever want the possibility of running across that sick fuck again.”

He pulled into a restaurant parking lot and swung the car into a spot. “What are we doing?” Rachel asked.

“I want to take you out. We’ve spent the last month holed up in the house, and I want you to see that I’m not just here to take care of you. I know that you are doubting that I’ll be content being here. It’s time to start dating again. So, let’s go eat. My treat.”

Rachel laughed, and it felt great. Her stomach fluttered in anticipation like it used to when she and Devin first started dating all those years ago. He winked at her, leaning over and taking her lips forcefully. Sucking her bottom lip into his mouth, he slid his tongue inside her mouth, tasting her. Cupping her neck with his hand, he pulled her closer, nipping her top lip with his teeth as he continued the assault on her mouth.

Tilting her face, she deepened the kiss, twinges shooting all over her body. Happy that both of her arms were finally free, she put her hands on either side of his face. Feeling the slight stubble he had at this time of day, the outline of his chiseled face, and his thick neck, she then ran her hands into his hair, pulling him as close as he could get. As he pulled back slightly, scraping his teeth along her bottom lip, his eyes locked with hers, and she almost gasped at the look in his eyes. Pure, raw need and desire poured from his eyes. Using his thumb to trace her bottom lip, all she could do was stare at him as her body tried to come back to earth.

“God,” Devin breathed. “I can’t wait to make love to you, Rachel. It was always fabulous, but I have the feeling …”

“Can we order take out?” Rachel interrupted, her voice husky with the want that was still coursing through her veins. “I’m ready, Dev. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted you in my life. Please.”

Devin’s eyes darkened at her words, and he looked at her intently. Her wide green eyes were fixated on his. Electricity crackled between them. He thought for sure that if he reached out and touched her, a spark would fly. His mouth was dry and his heart was pounding. What he wanted to do was peel out of that parking lot as fast as he could, burning rubber all the way. But he had to play it cool.

He touched her leg, tracing his finger up her thigh. “Let’s go in and get some dinner. Then, we’ll have dessert at home.”

Rachel groaned, fluttering her eyes closed as he teased her. He didn’t say no. A smile lifted her lips, and she put her hand on his firm chest, tracing his muscles. “Devin Putnam.” Her voice was so low she almost didn’t recognize it. His eyes watched her, fixated. She leaned over so her mouth was right next to his ear, then whispered exactly what she would do at that moment if he would let her.

“Damn,” Devin breathed. “You expect me to go in there after that? That was part of your plan, wasn’t it?”

“Take out,” Rachel teased, running her tongue along his ear, then down to his neck. “We won’t even need plates.”

She didn’t have to say another word. Devin revved the engine, peeling out of the parking lot, already dialing the Chinese place on the corner by his house.

Walking in the house, Rachel felt like her body was in overdrive. The whole drive home, they had been touching each other, kissing at stoplights, and acting like they hadn’t been together in years. Because they hadn’t. That was going to end. Right now.

“Food?” Rachel raised her eyebrow, holding the bag of Chinese they had picked up. Devin took the bag from her hand and set it on the kitchen counter. Taking her by the hand, he leaned her backwards and began kissing her neck, nipping and licking until he reached her lips.

“I didn’t even think I was going to make it home without stopping and giving you what you were asking for. The only reason I did is that after all this time, I wasn’t taking you in the car. But, oh my god, Rachel Dawson. I’ve been a good boy for the last month, letting you heal. I’m not going to be good tonight. I’m going to do everything, and I mean
everything
that I’ve wanted to do. So I want something to eat, but it isn’t Chinese food.”

Rachel’s stomach clenched, but she realized that it was in anticipation and desire, not in fear. It was a great feeling. She wrapped her arms around his waist, tipping her face up to kiss him again. She was pretty sure she could kiss him for the rest of her life and never tire of those lips, that tongue, and the feeling of his body touching hers. She lifted his shirt so she could feel the bare skin of his taut muscles. Running her fingernails along the ripples, then down to the waistband of his pants, she hesitated. She was always so confident, knowing exactly what she wanted from men and how to play them. But this was different. This was Devin, and she had to do this right.

Devin took control, and she was relieved. She was tired of being in control. He pushed her back against the wall in the hallway, right outside of their room.
Their room.
She had just thought that. She noticed that he was gentle, even though he was wanting to be anything but. He lifted her shirt, throwing it behind him as he took in her white lace bra. Dipping his head, he kissed her in between her full breasts as his hands worked simultaneously on her button of her pants. Shoving them down her hips, he took in her matching white thong underwear, and he stepped back.

“My god,” he murmured. “Rachel. I know I’ve seen you this way, and I’ve been helping you with dressing and showers, but this … this is different. It’s like I’m seeing you for the first time, all over again. You’re exquisite.”

Rachel smiled, feeling like the most wanted woman in the world. She didn’t feel her scar, where the gunshot would always be a memory. She didn’t feel her sore ribs or weak arm. She felt like … herself. It was time to show him how much better she really was.

Stepping closer to Devin, she pulled his shirt off, her eyes scanning the broad expanse of his chest and arms. She loved looking at him. Her eyes followed to the buckle of his pants, and she kissed down his chest as she undid them and helped them join her clothes on the floor. He stood in front of her in his white boxer briefs, a stark contrast to the olive skin of his torso and legs. He was mouth-watering. Being careful to not be too rough, he pulled her to him, his hands roaming her backside, kneading and exploring. He unhooked her bra and flung it away from them, cupping her breasts in his large hands.

She wrapped her legs around him as he walked backwards with her, into the bedroom. She could feel him against her as they moved, and her eyes rolled back in her head.

“Dev,” she whispered. He settled her gently on the bed, his dark eyes hooded. “Make love to me.”

He leaned backwards, sliding her panties off and flinging them to the floor, followed by his boxer briefs. For the first time in so long, they were naked together. “Are you okay?”

Rachel closed her eyes, knowing he was asking because of
him
. Justin. She couldn’t let him into this, or that would be the end. She forced her eyes open. Devin’s handsome face came into view, looking at her with a combination of lust and concern, and her heart stuttered. Desire surged through her veins, and just like that, Justin was gone. Instead of answering, Rachel reached down and took him in her hand. He rubbed against her, silk over steel, then used one hand to touch her. Arching her back, she let the sensations of him touching her, caressing her take over, washing away the times she had been touched like this against her will. She felt every single touch with a renewed sense of what it felt like to be loved, cherished. Where his fingers touched her, she felt warmed, soothed. Like he was taking away the pain of her ordeal. She had done this countless times over the last several years, with people she didn’t care to remember. But nothing, absolutely nothing, compared to the feeling of the man that you worship, love doing it.

Tears leaked from her closed eyes without warning, and she felt Devin stop immediately. Opening her eyes, she smiled, a small giggle escaping from her lips.

“I’m okay,” she whispered, tracing her fingers along his vee. “I’m just overwhelmed. This is how it’s supposed to feel.” Those words, they were there again, just under the surface. She willed herself to say them, she opened her mouth to say them, but it just wouldn’t come.

“Rachel,” Devin groaned, resuming his assault on her senses. “I need to be inside you, right now. Are you okay with that?”

She bit her lip, lifting her hips so she could rub herself against him. “More ready than I’ve been for anything in a really long time.” Devin’s eyes flashed, and he leaned over, intertwining their fingers together as he pressed at her entrance.

“I’m safe,” Devin whispered into her ear, and she shivered. She wasn’t sure exactly which meaning he meant by saying that, but she’d take all of them. She knew he was. She had never felt safer in her life. Turning her head, she met his eager lips, and they hungrily sucked on each other’s lips and tongues as he pushed himself gently inside her. She gasped into his mouth as she felt the pressure of him inside her, and he stilled. Using her feet to pull him back towards her, he resumed without saying a word. Their kisses matched the rhythm of his pulses. Rachel’s head was reeling. It was so different, even though the action was the same. With him, everything was like seeing it, feeling it, for the first time. Her body started quivering, close to release already.

He broke their kiss to suckle her neck, then turned her quickly so she was on top, straddling him while he was still inside her. She smiled at him, loving him for giving her the control. “Rachel.” His hands caressed her breasts, then he used one to touch her where they were joined, causing her to throw her head back and groan in satisfaction. The man just knew exactly what to do. “I need you … I …” Devin closed his eyes, shifting his hands to her hips so he could rock her back and forth. She understood what he needed, because she needed it too. She began moving on top of him, the feeling of fullness stretching her, teasing her with sensation.

He continued to rock her hips with his hands as he watched her, his eyes wide. Her hair was loose and falling around her face, as he loved it. They locked eyes as she moved up and down, teasing him. They both knew what they wanted, and they were ready. She increased her pace, moving faster and harder. She leaned over so her face was even with his as they moved furiously together, both racing for the feeling they were craving. He removed his hands from her hips and used them to frame her face, kissing her deeply as her body began shuddering over him.

“Devin!” she screamed, pulling away from his mouth as her body let go completely. Using her release to allow his own, he pumped into her, losing himself in the feeling he thought he would never have again; her wrapped around him, screaming his name.

As they both came down from the high of their first time in years, Devin pulled her to his side and kissed the top of her head. “My God,” he breathed. “You are beyond incredible, Rachel. That was the most amazing experience of my life. Are you okay?”

Rachel lifted her face and pressed a kiss to her favorite arm her spot. “Devin, all of these years, I’ve been trying so hard to replace you, to make my mind forget by filling it with … men. But, every time, Dev. Every single time, I was disappointed. No one can ever be you because you are the only one for me. And to answer your question, yes. I’m more than okay. That wasn’t just sex, Devin. That was you, bringing me back to life. I want to do that over, and over and over again. And next time,” she rolled over to face him, a glint in her eye. “I want it like I know you wanted to do it this time. Hard, fast, and in whatever position you want it. We had some fabulous times together. Let’s do that again.”

“I want nothing more than to do it all,” Devin said, his voice low. “But don’t mistake what just happened for me just being gentle on you. I wanted to make love to you, to show you what you mean to me. I can tell you all day long, but I wanted you to feel it; feel me. My heart is beating only for you. My body is yours. I love you, Rachel.”

She climbed back on top of him, pressing her body against him. “Devin,” she said, her face even with his. Pressing kisses to his eyes, nose, then lips, her body started shaking. Why was this so hard for her? She knew it like she knew her own name, but saying it was so difficult for her. “I …” She dipped her head down and kissed his ear, running her tongue along it, then his neck. When goose bumps broke out on his body, she grinned against his neck. Going back to his lips, she put her hands against his face and looked at him in the eyes. “I love your eyes,” she whispered. “And your face. God help me, that body is to die for. But Devin?”