Real Women Don't Wear Size 2 (8 page)

“Have mercy, child. You look like you just rolled out of bed.” Gertrude Robinson proclaimed, her pink-glossed lips stretching into her porcelain cheeks as she smiled. “Looks like you better tell me about your day. If you have enough energy left, that is.”

“Energy?”

With her heels barely clicking on Clarise’s hardwood floor, Granny Gert glided down the hall, crossed the tiny living room and stood in front of Clarise. Then she placed her index finger beneath her granddaughter’s chin and tilted her face from one side to the other. “It’s all right if you don’t want to talk about it, sweetie. But I’m curious—it’s that good-looking boss of yours, right? The one you spend your Friday nights with?”

Clarise blinked. What was she talking about? “We have coffee, Granny, on Friday afternoons, not evenings.” She situated her shopping bags. “And what about Ethan?”

Another shiny, knowing grin flashed, and Clarise saw a hint of her blurred reflection via her grandmother’s lips.

“Ethan. Yes, that’s the one. I knew it, you know. I suspected last year at that company picnic, when you let me tag along. I could see it happening between you two, but I figured it wouldn’t take this long. Usually a spark starts a fire a bit quicker, or it used to, back in the day when your grandpa Henry came courting me. God rest his soul.”

Any way Clarise looked at it, Gertrude Robinson was still in “the day.” “What did you suspect?” she asked.

“Grandmothers are keen to these things, you know,” Granny said, chuckling softly. “It’s in our nature.” She draped an arm around Clarise and guided her to the couch. “I’ve been waiting for this to happen, so I hope you’ll indulge me in a bit of how it got started. Not the, er, overly interesting details, just the basics.”

“The basics?”

“Or not,” she said, shrugging. “It’s up to you, dear. I’m pleased either way. So, is he going too?”

Clarise was suddenly tempted to believe her father’s claim that Granny Gert lived in another world. He’d said as much when he deemed her ready for the retirement village. Clarise had nothing against the place, but her grandmother had way too much spunk to be trapped in a complex where the main activities were bingo and shuffleboard; that was more her father’s speed. Her mother and Granny Gert were much too alive to be stifled. But Clarise had to admit, right now, her grandmother seemed to be having a conversation that definitely didn’t involve the here and now.

“Going too?” Clarise asked.

“On the trip. Goodness child, it’s been a long time since I’ve had a romp in the hay, but I sure enough remember what I looked like after. Though, as much as my dear Henry and I liked variety, we never had a good time in his office. I honestly don’t believe we could’ve pulled it off. Guess you’re not as noisy as I was.” She giggled girlishly. “Lordy, I bet that’s more than you wanted to know.”

Clarise blinked. “You think I did
that
? Today? At the office? With Ethan?”

“Oh, honey, it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it.” She patted Clarise’s knee, then ended with a gentle squeeze that made Clarise jump. “I totally understand, and I admire your ability to keep it all in. Me, I always had to tell somebody. Made it a little more fun, in my opinion. That guess-what-we-did kind of thing. I talked to your great-aunt Sybil, God rest her soul. She was determined she and your great-uncle Clyde would one-up the two of us eventually, but I swear, your grandpa Henry and I weren’t gonna be outdone by anyone. I mentioned we liked variety, didn’t I?”

Clarise wasn’t sure she needed to hear any more about her grandparents’ variety. “I worked today. Nothing else. I promise.” Not that she would have declined a bit of variety, as Granny called it, with Ethan. Heck, the way she got worked up over merely talking to him, she could only imagine what sex would do, but even though she crawled on top of his luscious body nightly in her dreams, the real deal hadn’t happened. Yet. At Gasparilla, however, if dreams came true . . .

Her grandmother tilted her head and considered her words. “Seriously? You haven’t been, you know, getting cozy with your boss today?”

“Not my boss, or anyone else. I believe I’d remember if I had. Plus, Ethan wasn’t at work today; he’s been out of town working on a big deal to purchase additional stores.”

“Well then, child, you sure didn’t take your normal considerations with your appearance this morning, did you? Guess you were excited about the trip, hmm?”

“I spent the afternoon trying on new clothes at the Body Boutique, before wrapping up with a lingerie binge in Trussville after my class was canceled. I guess I dressed rather quickly. I look rough?” she questioned.

Granny tilted her head, evidently trying to decide what to say, then she shrugged, and blurted, “You look like you’ve had great sex.”

Clarise laughed. “Well, I haven’t.”

“It’ll happen, child,” Granny consoled.

“I hope you’re right,” Clarise said, then silently added,
“and I hope it happens with Ethan.”

Granny Gert’s giggle sounded almost teenish. “Okay,” she said, “enough sex talk, since neither of us has had any lately. Tell me about your afternoon. You said you tried your new things on at the store. That’s not your nature, so you might as well tell me what happened. And, by the way, it’s about time you opened up and saw everything for what it’s worth.”

“What it’s worth?”

“Your figure. You really do have one that deserves flaunting, sweetie.”

“Actually, the two girls who helped me out at Body Boutique probably picked some things you’ll like.”

“Really? Well, by all means, let’s have a look, and don’t you dare hold out on me with the lingerie items. It’s been a while since I’ve bought anything new, and I’d love to see what’s considered
in.
” She clapped her hands together. “You have time to model?”

Clarise laughed. “I don’t think so. I haven’t finished packing.” And she still needed to practice stripping. “How about I lay them out in the bedroom for your opinion?”

“Eh,” she said, shrugging off her disappointment, “I guess it’ll have to do. Go on and start laying them out, and I’ll finish cooking.”

“You cooked?” Clarise asked, her stomach tingling in anticipation.

“Shoot, you’re leaving tomorrow morning for Gasparilla, and I bet none of those folks down there have a clue how to fix good ol’ turnip greens and corn bread, not to mention pintos.”

“You shouldn’t have done that,” Clarise said, but she was inwardly celebrating. Her grandmother was the best cook she knew, and she loved doting on Clarise. Lord knows, Clarise didn’t mind letting her.

“Uh-uh,” Granny said, waving a mauve-tipped finger. “Don’t you start now. I love cooking for you. Made you a chocolate pie too.”

“With meringue?” Clarise’s mouth watered.

“As if it’d be a Gertrude Robinson blue-ribbon-winning chocolate pie without meringue,” Granny said, clucking her tongue as she headed toward the kitchen.

Laughing, Clarise scooped up her bags and hauled them to the bedroom. She wouldn’t be able to carry all of her new things to Tampa, so a quick perusal from Granny Gert might be exactly what she needed to help her decide what to bring. Draping the items around the bed, she listened to Granny Gert’s heels softly clicking down the hall. “Okay, let’s have a look,” Granny said, rounding the doorway of Clarise’s bedroom and shuffling toward the bed. Moving both palms to her cheeks, she gasped. “Oh, wow. They’re beautiful.”

“The clothes or the lingerie?”

“All of it.” She circled the bed, picking up the fabrics and rearranging the items so that each piece of clothing was topped with a wisp of lingerie. Then she slapped her palms together and nodded approvingly. “Yep, that’s how I’d do it.”

“How you’d do what?”

“Wear the unmentionables. See, you want to wear this red one with the tube top,” she said, fingering the filmy lace of the merry widow.

“Why’s that?” Clarise asked, ever intrigued by her grandmother’s infinite wisdom and amazed that it evidently included a knowledge of intimate apparel.

“Because it’s easy to pull down. One swipe and you’ve got everything right out in the open where it’s supposed to be, right? Then you can flip it back up in a jiff, if ya want.”

Clarise shook her head. “I get your point.”

“Or points,” Granny said, winking.

“You’re terrible,” Clarise said, her smile so broad it hurt her cheeks.

“So your father says,” Granny quipped, with a flippant shrug. “You can tell I lose sleep over it.”

“Well, I love you for it.”

“Exactly. So, is there a lucky fellow, say, your boss, for example, who’ll be on the receiving end of this show of sexy duds? He’s been the dream guy, hasn’t he?”

When Clarise didn’t answer, Granny added, “Child, like I said, I saw it last year. The thing you haven’t seen, however, is that spark flying from the other direction.”

Oh to dream. “You imagined that, Granny,” Clarise said, but she did wonder if Ethan had thought about more than friendship.

Another shrug, then Granny Gert lifted the fishnet stockings. “Oh, I had a pair of these. Wait a minute, I still do. In my second panty drawer.”

How many grandmothers kept two drawers for their
drawers?
Clarise grinned. She gave Granny Gert twenty minutes tops before she went searching for her own pair of slinky hose, and an hour at best before she slid them on.

“I didn’t imagine anything, young lady,” Granny said, transitioning quickly into the original conversation. “So, is he going along?”

“I told you before, we’re just friends. And yes, he’s going on the trip. I don’t know if he’s getting back in town tonight or tomorrow, but he told me he’d be back in time to head to Tampa and that he’d see me there.”

“Uh-huh,” she mumbled. “Oh, wow, this is gorgeous. It’s going to really play up your hair and eyes.” She fingered the green dress.

“It does, though I didn’t believe it until the girls at the shop pointed it out and made me try it on,” Clarise admitted.

“I gotta send those gals a thank-you note. They know their stuff, and so do I. Your boss
has
noticed, whether you realize it or not. I saw him looking at you, and I know that look.”

“That was last year at a company picnic. He was looking at all of his employees.”

“Not the same way,” Granny countered.

“I don’t think so, but you’re entitled to your opinion,” Clarise said, refusing to admit her hopes aloud. It was one thing to think it, quite another to verbalize it.
Were
there sparks on Ethan’s end?

“Well, if you’re not planning to fulfill those fantasies with your boss, why buy all these?” Then, before Clarise could answer, she continued, “Oh!” She turned and plopped down on the bed. “Okay. Well.” She quirked pink lips to the side. “I know I joke about sex, child, but I really don’t approve of you going down there to, well, do that with a stranger. I just assumed you were trying to entice your boss.”

“I am,” Clarise blurted, before her brain could signal to her mouth to choose her words wisely.

Granny Gert beamed triumphantly, and her rosy cheeks plumped up to push her eyes into tiny crinkles. “I knew it. You will be careful?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Clarise said, her own cheeks on fire.

Granny didn’t miss a beat. “You’ve got protection?”

Boy, did this conversation ever take a strange turn. “I do.”

“Tell me something, child.”

“What?” Clarise asked, bracing. What else was there to tell?

“He’s the real deal?”

“Ethan?”

Her grandmother nodded.

“Truthfully, I’m not sure he’s interested, not in anything more than friendship.”

“Yes, dear,” Granny said. “He’s interested. You’ll see. You know, I can tell those saleswomen steered you right. You’re going to be absolutely gorgeous for Gasparilla. Everyone’s gonna see how exquisite you are. Though I always knew it,” she said, as the phone rang. “Drat. I was supposed to tell you to call your sister. She’s been calling every hour on the hour since this afternoon.”

“What’s up?” Clarise asked, reaching toward the phone beside her bed.

“Don’t know. She said she had to talk to you before you leave town. Sounded urgent, but then again, everything’s urgent to Babette, isn’t it? Tell you what, let me answer it so I can apologize for forgetting to tell you. Lord knows I don’t want to tick that pistol off.”

Clarise laughed, snatched the phone and surveyed the caller ID display. “It says unknown number,” she said, then shrugged and handed the phone to her grandmother.

“Hello? Oh, yes, this is her place, but this is Gertrude.” Her eyes widened, then her cheeks blushed with even more pink. “Oh, of course. Yes, I can do that. Sure, I’d be happy to.” Her mouth curved slightly, and Clarise wondered who was on the other end. It obviously wasn’t her sister.

“Yes,” Granny said enthusiastically. “Yes, that’s fine.” She hung up and kept smiling.

“Who was it?” Clarise asked, puzzled.

“Wasn’t Babette,” Granny Gert said, then added, “Just one of those survey calls.”

“Survey calls?” Clarise questioned.

“Telemarketer, you know. Do you like this? Do you buy that? Do you want a free weekend trip to Orlando? That kind of thing.”

Clarise’s eyes squinted as she scrutinized her grandmother, who, unless Clarise had totally lost her ability to read Gertrude Robinson’s mannerisms, was at the most lying, and at the least, fibbing. Granny Gert swore there was a difference, though Clarise had yet to figure out what it was.

“Well,” Granny said, rising from the bed and brushing her hands down her skirt, “I need to go. And you need to call your sister, and you need to eat, and of course, you need to pack,” she rattled, kissing Clarise briefly on the cheek, then heading out the bedroom door. “I’m going on home now. I’m suddenly feeling tired,” she said.

Clarise had no idea what was going on with her, but she knew better than to question Granny’s motives. Once the woman had her mind made up, that was all she wrote on the subject. “Okay,” she said, as Granny Gert’s heels clicked softly down the hall.

“Call me from Tampa!” Granny yelled before the front door slammed.

Ethan snapped his cell phone shut and continued his drive across town. He was exhausted from the past four weeks of nonstop traveling, then to top things off, today’s flight had been delayed for two hours due to rough weather in Myrtle Beach, but he couldn’t go home yet. He had to see Clarise.