Reckless (11 page)

“And now? She’s a happy, well-adjusted little girl?” Avery asked.

“Why don’t you be the judge of that? Come with me this weekend.”

She stroked his forearm. “Are you sure it wouldn’t be awkward?”

“If you’re asking if I’ve ever brought a woman to meet Mel, the answer is no.” He held his breath, awaiting her response. He knew it had been an emotionally taxing evening for her and he didn’t want to push her past her breaking point by telling her something she wasn’t ready to hear. No matter how much he longed to say it.

“Why?”

“There hasn’t been anyone that special in my life in a long, long time.”

“Why now? Why me?”

He leaned forward to grab her wineglass and set it on the coffee table. She turned around to look at him and he couldn’t resist the urge to tuck a wayward strand of hair behind her ear. His hand lingered on her face and he had to close his eyes to resist the temptation to ease her back and slide his tongue between her full lips.

“Answer me,” she whispered.

He opened his eyes to see her easing up on her knees so she could straddle him. His heart damn near leapt out of his chest. “What’re you doing?”

“Do you mind?” she asked, wrapping her arms around his neck as she settled into his lap, facing him. She hiked her tight dress up her thighs so she could position her legs over his.

He had no doubt she could feel his arousal probing her through the layers of silk nylons and panties.

“Uh, no, I don’t mind.”

She threaded her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck and brushed her breasts against his chest. “You didn’t answer my question.”

He struggled to remember the question at a time when he couldn’t seem to remember his own name. “Uh, I want Mel to get to know you ‘cause I’m hoping you’re gonna be a part of my life for a long time to come, darlin’.” He saw the internal war waging in her eyes. She wanted to believe him, but self-preservation wouldn’t let her. “You don’t believe me, do you?”

She shrugged. “You may believe that now, but in a few months your life won’t even resemble the life you’re living now. You won’t be the same person you are today. Hell, you’ll be able to have any woman you want.”

“The woman I want is you,” he whispered, brushing his lips across hers.

She whimpered and tugged on his hair, pulling his face back until his mouth was inches from hers. “Don’t say that.”

He stroked her back, his fingers toying with the zipper while he waged his own internal battle between proving the depths of his feelings for her and allowing her to come to him on her own time. “It’s true, baby. I want you more now than I did that night two years ago. Two years from now, twenty years from now, I’m still gonna want you.”

She tugged her bottom lip between her teeth, looking torn. “I want to believe you, I do, it’s just...”

“You’re not sure if you can trust me or what you’re feeling for me… is that it?” His hands gripped her waist, a safe distance from the zipper that beckoned to him.

She shook her head. “If you weren’t married...” She held her hand up when he started to protest. “I know it’s just a piece of paper to you, but I look at your hand...” She held up his left hand. “And I see another woman’s ring.”

He had never worn a wedding ring, never had the desire to. But he knew when the time came, he would want Avery to place her ring on his finger. “If there was any way that I could divorce her tomorrow, I would. But my parents are getting on in years, Avery. I couldn’t ask them to re-finance the loan now. My father’s health is...”

She pressed the back of her hand against his lips. “I understand. You’re a good man, a good son.”

He feared her response, but he had to know. “Is that gonna cost me my last chance with you?” She closed her eyes and he felt the tentacles of fear wrapping around him, slowly cutting off his oxygen supply. He knew she could walk out of his life as easily as she had two years ago and there was nothing he could do to stop her. “I searched every crowd for you,” he said quickly, hoping the truth might sway her. “For months after, I kept hoping you’d show up at Jimmy’s.”

She opened her eyes and stared into his. “Really?”

“Yeah, I’d be in the middle of rehearsal, or taking a break at the bar and I’d see some random girl with the same color hair and I’d want to reach out and touch her, hoping...”

She smiled. “That’s so sweet.”

“God, I’d have these wicked dreams, Avery.”

She braced her hands on his shoulders. “What kind of dreams?” she whispered.

He let his head fall forward. He couldn’t let himself go there if she wasn’t willing to go there with him. He took a deep, shuddering breath. “Avery, I can’t.”

Her hands slid down his biceps to the front of his shirt. She began to undo the tiny buttons slowly.

He grabbed her wrists. “What are you doing?” he asked, half-afraid to stop her.

“I need you tonight. So far, you’ve been telling me how much I mean to you. Now I want you to show me.”

He groaned, pinning her hands against his chest. “Baby, are you sure about this? I need to know you’re gonna wake up in my arms tomorrow morning. If you left me again...” He took a deep breath, hesitant to reveal how vulnerable he was where this woman was concerned. “It would kill me.”

She ground into him, licking her lips. “I’m not going anywhere.”

He grabbed the back of her head and brought her mouth to his in a fierce kiss that conveyed how crazed her absence had made him. He wanted to fill her, her brain, her mouth, her body. He didn’t want to leave any room for fear or doubt to take her away from him again.

She groaned into his mouth and matched his frenzied pace.

His hands were everywhere, all over her body and still he couldn’t get enough of her, he needed more. He undid her zipper and spread the back of her dress open. He fumbled with the latch of her bra, eager to fill his mouth with her.

She stood up and let her dress fall to the floor at her feet as she watched him watching her.

He tried to rein in his reaction out of fear that his intensity might intimidate her, but when she finally hooked her thumbs into her panties and slid them down her legs, he reached his breaking point. He had to have her here, now. He stood up and shed his clothes in record time before tossing a throw on the ground in front of the fire. “On your back, hands over your head, spread your legs,” he said, barely able to get the words out.

“Hmmm,” she said, licking her lips as her eyes drifted closed. “I love it when you’re aggressive. It’s a real turn on, Ty.”

He grabbed her waist. “I’m not playing, Avery; do it now.” He watched her eyes darken with arousal and he knew she wanted him to take control, to give her the pleasure she’d been denying herself for too long. He watched her obey his commands and he fell a little harder, a little deeper in love with her.

She stroked her abdomen, skimming her full breasts, until both hands slid down the inside of her thighs. “Please,” she whispered, her breath catching on the plea.

He could see the hint of her arousal and his mouth began to water. It had been so long, he’d almost allowed himself to forget her unique flavor, but one swipe of his tongue reminded him. It was sweet, pungent, intoxicating.

She ground her hips on a gasp and he had to hold her hips in place to keep her from coming off the blanket. He couldn’t get enough of her. He sucked and lapped at her tender flesh, blowing a cool stream of air over her whenever he thought she was too close to the brink. He delved deeper, relentless in his quest to pleasure her.

“Oh, Ty, I’m gonna...”

He pressed his palms to the inside of her thighs, forcing her to keep her legs open when she tried to push him away. “I’m not done with you yet,” he whispered, enjoying the throbbing sensation as her legs trembled.

“Please,” she murmured.

He kissed the inside of her thighs before sliding up her torso. He drew her hard nipple into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the peak until she bucked against him. When he would have shown the other breast equal attention, she pressed her palms against his shoulders, forcing him to ease back.

“Now I want you flat on your back. Paybacks are a bitch, McCall.”

He couldn’t wait to feel her take him. He wanted to continue pleasuring her, but with the promise of what was to come, his body forced him to comply with her demands.

She straddled him, a wicked glint in her eye. “I’ve been waiting a long time to do this.” She stroked him gently before lowering her head to go down on him. His body responded immediately as he fisted his hands in her hair and began driving into her at a frenetic pace. Somewhere in the back of his mind he tried to call on his restraint, but with every thrust, she met him with equal gusto until she finally withdrew.

“I need to feel you inside of me, now,” she said, sitting down on top of him until she was taking every inch of him.

“Yesss,” he hissed, grabbing her waist as he drove into her relentlessly. God, it is even better than I remembered, he thought as he felt his body begin the climb to his imminent release. He reached up to stroke her breasts as she ground against him, seeking her own satisfaction.

He couldn’t get enough of her; he wasn’t ready for this to end. He held her still, trying to prolong his release when he realized... “Damn it, Avery, get up.”

She clenched her muscles tight around him. “I can’t. Oh, ah, I’m right there...”

And just like that, she took him with her. When he finally forced his eyes open, she was staring at him with a look of dread and fear in her eyes.

He brought her down on top of him so he could cradle her against his chest. “I’m sorry, baby. I’ve never forgotten to use a condom before. I was just so into you...”

“It’s okay,” she said, her voice shaky. “It was my fault.”

He hated that she sounded so scared and that he had been the one to make her feel that way. His goal had been to put her mind at ease, to make her feel safe, and instead, he’d left her feeling fearful and remorseful. “Tell me you’re on the pill.”

She shook her head. “I can’t take it.”

He raked his hand through his hair. He knew he should be panicking, but he wasn’t. The thought of Avery pregnant with his baby made him want to smile, but he knew she wouldn’t take kindly to his obvious satisfaction so he remained stone-faced as she jumped up and ran to her purse. “What are you doing?” he asked.

“I’m just checking my calendar. Chances are we have nothing to worry about. No, no, no,” she sank down on the couch, pulling her hands through her tangled hair.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” he asked, sitting up.

“I’m ovulating.”

He smiled, unable to contain his excitement. The thought of having a baby of his own, with this woman, was more than he could have hoped for.

“What the hell are you smiling about? Didn’t you hear what I just said?”

“I heard you.”

“Ty, you could’ve gotten me pregnant,” she shrieked. “Do you know what this means?”

He grinned. “Yeah, it means I might be a daddy by this time next year.”

She tossed her phone on the couch. “Damn it, would you grow up? This isn’t funny.”

He wrapped the blanket around his waist as he stood. “I know this isn’t funny, sweetheart. I know the timing may not be perfect, but the thought of you having my baby...” He smiled. “I want that. I didn’t know how much I wanted that until right now.”

She grabbed his shirt and shoved her arms through the openings. Instead of doing up the buttons, she wrapped it around herself as though she were chilled. “I can’t have a baby. I don’t know anything about being a mother.” She began to rub her temples. “God, this is a nightmare.”

He clenched his jaw, trying to rein in his temper. He tried to see this from her perspective. She wasn’t ready for an unplanned pregnancy. He couldn’t hold that against her. No matter how much he might want it, he didn’t have the right to force his will on her.

“Wait ‘til the press gets a hold of this. We’re trying to build this image, this powerful brand. Meanwhile, you knock up your publicist while you’re still married to another woman. God, Luc is gonna go crazy when he finds out about this.”

He sat down beside her on the couch, careful to put a safe distance between them. “Look, I don’t give a shit what anybody thinks. I love you...”

She looked like a deer trapped in the headlights of an oncoming car. “Don’t say that. What’s wrong with you? Don’t even think that.”

“Why the hell not? That’s how I feel. I love you, Avery.”

She jumped up and starting pacing the floor. “There has to be something we can do to prevent it, to...”

“You’re thirty-five. You’re telling me you’ve never thought about having a baby?”

She crossed her arms and glared at him. “Are you telling me you can hear my biological clock ticking from way over there?”

He scrubbed his hands over his face. There was no way to get out of this situation without upsetting her so he may as well say what was on his mind. “Are you saying you don’t want to have a baby right now, or you just don’t want to have a baby with me?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Maybe somebody like Jeff would be more appropriate, huh? Somebody older, more mature, financially...” He paused when he saw the look on her face. She wasn’t denying it. “It is me, isn’t it? You don’t think I have what it takes to be a good dad?”