Red (22 page)

The head judge, a severe-looking woman with white hair, stared her down over a pair of half glasses. “Felicity St. John,” she said, “you’ve certainly made this competition interesting.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Felicity wasn’t sure if she was being complimented or insulted.

“As you’re probably aware, your talent routine was in violation of section 103b of the pageant code, which states that a contestant may not alter her routine in any way after the final dress rehearsal without formally petitioning the pageant committee. Are you familiar with this rule, Miss St. John?”

Felicity nodded. “I wasn’t at the time I switched the music, ma’am, but I am now.”

“May I take that to mean that you did not, in fact,
read
the pageant rules prior to the competition?”

Felicity had flipped through the rule book briefly when she’d received her Miss Scarlet packet in the mail, then tossed it in the recycling bin. She had assumed her mom would keep her from doing anything that wasn’t allowed. “I read some of it, ma’am. But I must have missed that part.”

“Apparently.” The judge made a note on her legal pad. “Are you aware, Miss St. John, that failure to abide by the pageant code is grounds for disqualification?”

“I am aware of that. Yes.” Felicity realized her hands were trembling, and she clasped them together more tightly.

“The judges will take a vote to determine whether you will remain in the running for the title of Miss Scarlet. Ordinarily, the pageant director would conduct said vote, but obviously that won’t be possible today. Mrs. St. John, please step into the hall with Felicity, and we’ll let you know when we’ve made a decision.”

“We’ll wait in my office,” Ginger said. Felicity was horrified to hear how broken her mother’s voice sounded. She followed her down the hall, grateful that the judges hadn’t brought up the forged question. That, at least, was a small mercy.

“How could you do this to me?” her mother snapped the moment the office door closed behind them. “I spent
seventeen years
preparing you for today! I gave you everything,
every
opportunity, because I was sure you were a good investment! But I guess I was wrong, Felicity, since you decided to repay me by getting yourself disqualified and
then telling the entire town I’m a liar
!”

“Mom, I—”

“All I ever asked from you was that you take this competition seriously and win that prize for us, and I told you
exactly
how to do it. All you had to do was follow my instructions. You couldn’t even do
that
for me, after all I’ve given up for you!”

Felicity felt as if all the air had been sucked from the room. “I know how much you’ve done for me,” she pleaded. “And I appreciate all of it, I swear. I’ve tried so hard to be everything you wanted me to be, but I just … I’m not that girl, Mom. I don’t belong in pageants, and I never have. I’m not even a real redhead.”

“I made you into a redhead, and you threw it all away!” Ginger screamed. “I lied for you and sacrificed for you so you could have the life I thought you deserved! But because of what you did out there today, Felicity, everyone will think you’re
nothing
from now on. Not to mention you’ve put my job and my reputation on the line. Are you satisfied? Is this what you wanted?”

“I was being blackmailed!” Felicity yelled back. “I didn’t do this for the
fun
of it! I know you didn’t want me to fight Gabby, but I couldn’t just lie down and let her take everything away from me!” Tears sprang to her eyes, and she angrily swiped them away with the back of her hand. “This sucks for me, too, Mom, trust me! Everyone probably hates me now. But even that will be better than living every single second terrified someone is going to expose me. My entire life was a lie! You have no idea what that’s like!”

Ginger took a quick step forward, her face crimson with fury, and Felicity thought for a moment that her mom was going to hit her. But Ginger just leaned close to her ear and hissed, “I know
exactly
what it’s like, Felicity, but unlike
some people,
I can handle it!”

It took Felicity a minute to figure out what her mom was implying.

And then she finally put the pieces together.

Her mouth dropped open.

“Are you saying—” she stammered. “But …
you
?
You’re
a str—”

“Don’t say it out loud,” her mom snapped.

“But I—”

“How do you think it feels to protect a secret for
forty-two years,
Felicity, only to have it thrown out in the open by the person you love the most?”

Ginger and Felicity both whipped around as the head judge opened the office door. “We’re ready for you now,” she said.

Numb with shock, Felicity followed her mother back into the conference room. She stood before the row of judges, trying not to show that her whole world had just been turned inside out.

“Felicity St. John, the judges have voted to disqualify you from the Miss Scarlet Pageant,” the head judge announced. “In an effort not to humiliate you, this decision will not be made public. You will stand on the stage with the other girls for the coronation. Nobody ever has to know.”

Ginger put her head down on the table and cried as if the world were ending.

Felicity sat on the cold marble floor outside the dressing room, too shocked even for tears. Ever since she was a child, she had thought she was alone in the world, that nobody really knew what her life was like. But there had always been someone who empathized; Ginger had merely opted not to reveal herself. Felicity wondered what it would have been like to grow up knowing that her mom understood her on a deep level. Now it was too late, and she would never know.

Ginger’s words echoed through her mind over and over:
everyone will think you’re nothing from now on.
Now that the euphoria of outwitting Gabby had worn off, Felicity wondered if she really had destroyed her entire world by outing herself. Spending the next year at Scarletville High as a strawbie would be a living hell. And now, without the prize money, art school would always be just a dream. Her life stretched before her, gray and flat and featureless.

Ivy stuck her head through the doorway. “Brenda wants us to line up soon. Why are you on the floor?”

Felicity wanted to blurt out everything, but her mom’s secret wasn’t hers to tell. “I got disqualified,” she said instead. “It’s all over.”

Ivy shrugged and sat down next to her. “So you won’t be a beauty queen. I think you’ll live. Honestly, I’m relieved you’re out of the running. One fewer person between me and that sparkly, sparkly tiara.”

Felicity gave her friend a feeble smile, but it only lasted a moment. “It’s not about the title. I don’t care about that. But I really needed the prize money.”

“For what?”

“For art school.”

“You want to go to art school? Felicity, that’s
awesome
!”

“It would have been. But now I guess I’m going to Scarletville Community College. If they’ll even take me.”

“Hang on, what about financial aid?” Ivy asked. “Lots of people go to schools they can’t afford.”

“My mom doesn’t believe in that stuff. Apparently, ‘St. Johns don’t accept charity.’ ”

“Financial aid is not
charity
. And you’re about to turn eighteen. You don’t need her permission. You can apply for whatever you want. Plus, I’m sure there are merit-based art scholarships. You should ask Ms. Kellogg. And maybe your mom would even help you out with the money a little.”

“She won’t,” Felicity said. “She hates me for what I said up there.”

“She doesn’t
hate
you. I’m sure she’s pissed now, but she’ll get over it eventually. All you did was stand up for yourself.”

“You should have heard the things she said to me, Ives. It was really horrible. Can I sleep at your house tonight? I don’t even want to see her.”

“Of course. That’s fine.”

The dressing room door opened, and Haylie poked her head out. “It’s almost time, Ivy,” she said.

Felicity moved to get up. “Hays, I was wondering where you were. Do you want—”

But Haylie didn’t even look at her. She just closed the door in Felicity’s face.

Felicity gaped at Ivy. “What just happened?”

“I think she’s having a hard time with this whole thing. She feels like you lied to her.” Ivy picked at her nail, suddenly unable to meet Felicity’s eyes.

“I only lied because of the blackmail. I explained that. And I thought she was over the whole prom nomination thing, anyway. We were totally fine an hour ago.”

“Not about the prom thing. About your hair.”

Felicity felt as if she’d been stabbed with an icicle. “What happened to ‘We’re all in this together and I’ll have your back no matter what’?”

“That’s exactly what I said to her, but she’s so emotional, I don’t think I got through to her at all. And she’s nervous about the coronation on top of everything else. She’ll probably snap out of it as soon as the pageant’s over.”

“We’ve been best friends since preschool! She seriously won’t talk to me because my hair is four shades lighter than she thought it was?”

“Two minutes! Everyone upstairs now!” hollered Brenda.

Ivy stood up and offered Felicity her hand. “We should go,” she said. “We’ll talk about it later, okay? Ten more minutes and this will all be over.”

Felicity considered just staying there in the hallway until the pageant ended. What was the point of putting herself on display for hundreds of judgmental eyes, just so everyone could watch her lose? But then she thought of her brothers and the Vaughns and Ms. Kellogg and Jonathan. They were still out there rooting for her, and they would want her to hold her head high and finish what she’d started. She couldn’t let them down.

Felicity let Ivy pull her to her feet and lead her up the stairs to the stage.

She tried to get Haylie’s attention again, but her friend stood motionless at the front of the line and pretended not to hear when Felicity whispered her name. Donna Marie, who was back at the podium in a different dress, asked the audience to give a big round of applause to all the Miss Scarlet contestants. The girls starting filing onto the stage, and Felicity followed them out into the glare of the lights.

“Aren’t they gorgeous?” Donna Marie squealed. “Look at those dresses, just like tropical flowers. Well, ladies and gentlemen—girls—the most exciting moment of the pageant is upon us! Right here in this envelope, I hold the name of this year’s Miss Scarlet! It’s time to crown her now.”

The audience went wild as Georgia appeared from stage left, holding the Miss Scarlet crown on a red velvet pillow. The rhinestones twinkled furiously under the stage lights. The twelve girls on the stage clasped hands as Donna Marie tore open the envelope containing the winner’s name. As Felicity entwined her fingers with Ivy’s and Ariel’s, she thanked the universe for placing her between the only two competitors who wouldn’t recoil from her touch. Both girls squeezed her hands, and she felt just a tiny bit stronger as she squeezed back.

“This year’s first runner-up, who will take Miss Scarlet’s place if she is unable to perform her duties, is … Madison Banks!”

In all the pageants she had attended, Felicity had never seen a less happy first runner-up. Madison, whose gold-sequined gown was painfully bright under the lights, scowled as she stepped to the front of the stage to acknowledge her applause. When a pageant volunteer presented her with a huge bouquet of red roses, Madison looked as if she might eat her. “The fact that she didn’t win just made my life,” whispered Ivy, who wasn’t even bothering to clap. Felicity nodded. She glanced over at Haylie and gave her a supportive smile, but her friend wouldn’t meet her eyes. She was visibly trembling and gripping Cassie’s hand with bone-crushing force.

“And now, Scarletville, the moment you’ve all been waiting for,” announced Donna Marie. “This year’s highest-scoring contestant, in a rare unanimous decision by the judges, is … Haylie Adams!”

The entire shrieking crowd was on its feet in an instant, and Felicity cheered, too. For the first time since becoming an official strawbie, she experienced a moment of genuine happiness, even as she watched her mom storm up the aisle and out of the auditorium. The press photographers rushed the stage like children mobbing an ice cream truck and vied for the best shots of Haylie, who was screaming, laughing, and crying all at once. Her chandelier earrings caught the light of countless camera flashes as she jumped up and down, unable to contain her joy. Donna Marie had to hold her down so Georgia could pin the crown to her hair.

A pageant volunteer draped a Miss Scarlet sash over Haylie’s shoulder, and another heaped her arms with red flowers. As Haylie raised her hand in the beauty queen wave she’d been practicing since first grade, confetti cannons erupted on both sides of the stage and showered everyone with glittery paper streamers.

“She deserves it,” Ivy shouted over the noise. “She was seriously amazing.”

Felicity nodded. “I’m glad she won.”

“Let’s go say congratulations.”

Haylie’s parents fought their way onto the stage and swept their daughter into their arms as she repeatedly screamed, “I won, I won, I can’t believe I won!” Ivy and Felicity waited for Haylie’s mom to release her. When Haylie finally noticed them, she launched herself directly at Ivy, nearly smothering her with the enormous bouquet. After a long moment, she let go and turned to Felicity.

And as Haylie looked at her, Felicity saw something slam shut behind her best friend’s eyes.

She reached for Haylie anyway, but her friend was stiff and awkward in her arms and pulled away after only a few seconds. Felicity wanted to shake her and say,
Haylie, I’m still me. I’m exactly the same person I was an hour ago.
But instead, she just said, “Congratulations, Hays. I’m so proud of you. You really deserve this.”

“Thank you.” Haylie smiled, but it was a polite, distant smile. Then she pushed past Felicity and was gone.

Parents were swarming the stage now, and as Felicity watched them embrace their emotional, sparkle-clad girls, a wave of loneliness engulfed her. This wasn’t how things were supposed to go. Whether she won the pageant or not, her friends and family were supposed to be there when it was over. There were supposed to be flowers and kisses and congratulations. There were supposed to be shoulders to cry on.