Regrets of The Fallen (Victis Honor Book 1) (36 page)

Dalgus heaved a sigh as he sat back, running a hand over his face. “It’s never people I
dislike
being put in situations like this.”

“But we can help them,” Ophelia said with a look at Dalgus. “We can at least keep them from having to run.”

The mercenary general nodded. “Yeah… Yeah, we can. I’ll put my army in the way. No one’s going to reach them as long as they’re here.”

“Thanks,” Freya said honestly. “I like these two; I don’t want to see ‘em hurt if I can ‘elp it.”

Suria shook her head. “Isabella doesn’t seem depressed, really; I didn’t notice anything was wrong.”

Freya smiled at her. “You didn’t look deep enough, lass. You’ll get th’ hang o’ readin’ people eventually. But don’t get me wrong – not
everythin’s
goin’ bad for ‘er. Just ask ‘er yerself sometime.”

IXH

It was some point late in the night, Haruka hadn’t really bothered to keep time. Isabella had woken up feeling better a couple hours before and after that, well, she’d lost track of time even more so. Now she lay under her tracing a finger over the scars on Bella’s bare back, remembering the first time she’d seen them, when Bella had teased her by starting to undress. She touched a particularly deep gash on her lower back, following the furrow. “What was this one? It looks like an axe.”

Isabella had her head on Haruka’s chest and her eyes closed, enjoying the odd tingle the monk’s calloused fingers caused. “That was a
battle-axe,” she answered. “It would’ve severed my spine if not for my armor. Big guy was swinging it.”

“You must have been mobbed,” Haruka guessed, having seen Bella’s ability to dodge even now. Bella nodded and Haruka continued the search, touching an odd circular scar. “I don’t recognize this weapon scar,” she said as she traced the curve.

“That’s because it wasn’t a weapon. There was a metal spike sticking out of the ground and someone tried to impale me on it. I managed to cut off the top of the spike as he did, but the edge of the pole still cut into me.”

Haruka winced. “That sounds painful.”

“More frustrating than painful,” Bella said, shifting to point to a scar on her hip. “
This
one was painful.”

Haruka looked over her shoulder to see the jagged scar, grimacing at its brutal appearance. “I don’t even want to guess what caused that.”

“You wouldn’t get it anyway,” Bella said with a smile.

“So what was it, then?”

“A saw.”

Haruka blinked. “A saw? Like… The type you use to cut wood?”

“The two-person type you use to cut down a tree.”

“How did…?”

“They piled on me,” Bella explained. “Two of them then tried to cut me in half. They got pretty deep into the bone before I got them off.”

Haruka shook her head. “That’s… sadistic.”

Isabella sighed. “I had it coming. That’s the thing; I deserved most of these scars when I got them. Everyone who gave one to me died.”

“No, there are… limits. At some point even revenge or vengeance can go too far.”

“You think so?” Bella moved Haruka’s arm to see the scar on her forearm, one that matched on both arms from the story she’d told Bella the day before. “I think yours are worse. You didn’t deserve any of them.”

“No, I didn’t,” Haruka agreed. “At least, not the ones from training. The ones from missions I deserved, those all came from mistakes.”

“Oh, I have some of those. I guess there’s no way to be perfect in a fight, huh?”

“If you ever meet an experienced fighter who claims to have no scars, they’re lying about one or the other.”

Bella smiled. “Mhmm… I can’t wait until I’m done fighting. I’ve never liked it.”

“Never?”

Bella shook her head. “I know a lot of people who are strong enjoy it, but I never reached that point. Fighting is necessary, but I wish it wasn’t. I’m just so
tired
of it.” She sighed. “I’m tired of… so many things.”

Haruka kissed her head. “It’s almost over. Soon it will just be you, me, and whatever you want to do, wherever you want to go.”

Bella smiled, closing her eyes again. “Sounds perfect.”

IXH

The next morning Isabella, Haruka, Able, Suria, Dalgus and Ophelia all stood at the edge of the camp in front of Freya. A group of eight mercenaries stood nearby with nine horses they’d be taking, talking among themselves as they prepared to leave. Freya was speaking to Suria, ruffling her hair in a manner that would probably annoy most people but just made the nineteen-year-old smile. “Well, Little Red, you an’ I didn’t get a lotta time t’ talk, but if you’re joinin’ my crew later, we’ll ‘ave all the time in th’ world.”

Suria smiled at her, grinning as she tried to fix her hair. “I’m looking forward to it. You’ll teach me all the
piratey words, right?”

Freya chuckled. “You bet. Gimme two weeks an’ you’ll be speakin’ like th’ saltiest dog on th’ brine.”

“Right, stuff like that.”

Freya grinned and winked, ruffling her hair again just to mess it up more before moving to Able. “Alright, kid?”

Able tilted his head, studying her. “What are you expecting?”

“I dunno. Sadness? Depression?” She grinned. “A tearful goodbye while ye cling t’ my legs an’ beg me not t’ go?”

He smirked very slightly. “I don’t get sad.”

“Well fine, ye robot, jus’ stand there an’ stare like a statue.”

“Am I a robot or a statue?”

“You’re a robot statue, bastard. Don’t get sarcastic with your elders.”

“Sorry, I thought you were elderly enough that you wouldn’t hear me.”

“Don’t think I won’t beat you senseless with yer own arm.” Freya paused before ruffling his hair too, receiving a glare for her actions that just made her laugh. She waved far too cheerily at him before stepping around him to talk to Ophelia. “You keep lookin’ after me nephew, Phelly. ‘
e needs someone smart keepin’ ‘im in line.”

The woman smiled at her. “That won’t be a problem. I learned how to deal with him quite a long time ago.”

Dalgus looked at them with a frown. “I’m
right here
, you know.”

Freya grinned at him. “So ye are. Wanna medal?”

“Yes.”

“Tough. Losers don’t get medals.”

Dalgus’ frown grew. “Should you be standing this long? Your back might give out.”

“Oho, y’ wanna go now, sonny?”

Dalgus cocked his head and grinned. “What kind of nephew would I be if I hurt my old aunt?”

Freya met his grin, folding her arms. “I been kickin’ ass since b’fore ye were born.”

“That’s kinda my point.”

“Keep that mouth o’ yers goin’ an’ I’ll be doin’ it long after yer
dead
, too.”

“Alright, alright, point taken.”

“Better be.” Freya gave him a playful shove before walking away from that group and over to where Haruka with her arms folded. She watched the monk’s face for a moment. “You alright, Ruka?”

“Not really,” the monk answered honestly, though her face betrayed little.

“You hang in there.” Freya set a hand on her shoulder. “I can see th’ effect you ‘ave on ‘er. My advice? Forget th’ last chapter long as you can an’ enjoy th’ book. You’re makin’ ‘er ‘appy, no reason t’ ruin that with a future problem.”

Haruka sighed. “I’ll try. Thank you for… everything you’ve done for us.”

Freya flashed a grin. “Ain’t a problem, lass. Come visit me sometime, eh?”

“I will. Promise.”

“Good.” Freya squeezed her shoulder before walking over to say goodbye to Isabella. The knight already had visible tears and Freya’s face fell at the sight. “Oh, don’t do that, lass, I won’t be able t’ hold out. I gotta tough pirate image t’ protect!”

Isabella smiled, wiping her eyes. “I’m sorry, I just… I’m going to miss you and I don’t know if I’ll see you again.”

Freya sighed, looking at the ground. “That’s ‘arder t’ deal with. I’m just gonna assume you will, alright?” Isabella hugged her and Freya blinked a few times as she patted her pack. “Don’t get all emotional on me. You’re stronger than y’ think; you’ll make it.”

Bella gave a shaky sigh, stepping back and looking at her. “Thank you… so much. We would never have made it this far without you. You’re the best thing to happen to us since this started.”

Freya took Bella by the shoulders, staring into her eyes. “I’d do more if I could. You promise you’ll come see me with Ruka over there, alright? Promise.”

Bella nodded, smiling weakly. “I promise.”

“I’m holdin’ you to that. You try t’ skip outta that, I’ll come find you wherever y’ are an’ drag you back, you ‘ear?” Bella laughed softly and Freya patted her shoulder before turning around, heading over to the horses to climb onto the one waiting for her. As the other mercenaries mounted theirs she turned back to the group, grinning. “You all don’t get into too much trouble without invitin’ me or I’ll never forgive you.”

Dalgus shook his head. “You
bring
us most of the trouble, like you’ve got a death wish and want to share it with the class.”

“Aye, it’s my job. Everybody dies, an’ I intend t’ deserve it.” She winked at them, giving a last look to Haruka and Isabella before kicking her horse forward and taking off with the others.

Isabella sighed, smiling at Haruka as the monk moved up beside her and took her hand. She looked back to watch Freya ride away, wondering if she actually would make it long enough to see her again.

Freya was wondering the same thing. As she reached the top of a distant hill she paused to look back at the small figures a good ways away. Part of her wanted to stay despite her life being miles away on the seas, but she knew she couldn’t. Instead she said a silent prayer to whoever was listening for her friends before she turned back and continued, riding until they were out of sight, but not out of mind.

If she was honest with herself, they’d probably never be out of mind.

“Did you ever get used to killing?” Suria had naively asked, a question she now couldn’t believe she’d been stupid enough to say to the woman.

Isabella had seemed so broken in that moment, even as she kept the smile that no longer seemed anything but self-deprecating. “I wish I hadn’t.”

Isabella stood atop a hill looking out over the plains around their current encampment. It had been two months since their arrival and they’d seen no sign of the Black Sun or Reis’ forces yet. She was beginning to hope that this meant the running was over; that Freya had been right in that they would remain safe here. Her head knew that wasn’t the case, but it still couldn’t convince her heart to give up its hopes. She squinted into the sunlight and turned, but there was nothing in sight in any direction – another safe day.

“Bella!” The knight turned to see Suria sprinting up the hill, stopping about halfway up. “She’s in the circle again!”

“What?!” Bella began running down the hill and Suria joined her once she reached her. “Why did no one tell me?” Bella shouted as they ran, reaching the edge of the tents and running between and around them.

“I’m telling you now!”

“I meant before it started!”

“It wasn’t planned!”

Soon after the sound of yelling reached their ears, a large crowd of mercenaries came into view. Bella and Suria ran into the crowd and they made room for them to reach the inner edge. Bella came to a stop, grinning as she caught her breath. Hundreds of mercenaries were crowded into a small area; in the middle there was an empty circle in which Haruka stood wearing a sleeveless shirt and shorts, both kept tight to prevent grabbing and make movement easier. Since her porcelain mask was an unfair advantage, Isabella had made her a green cloth mask that she could wear instead. She was also sweating and breathing deeply, as was the large man across from her. Four other men sat nearby looking beaten and bruised, the previous fighters.

“Ruki!” Haruka blinked and looked over, grinning once she spotted Isabella waving. She winked at her and the man she was fighting took the opportunity to throw a punch, but Haruka was expecting such an obvious move and easily sidestepped it. Since his defenses weren’t up (as he’d believed he had an advantage), Haruka’s fist rocketed forward and slammed into his face, bringing his feet up off the ground before his body hit the dirt. Isabella and Suria cheered, as did most of the other mercenaries. Money was exchanged and someone tossed Haruka a towel, which she used as the next challenger stepped up, removing his shirt and boots before moving to the center of the circle.

Haruka tossed away the towel and clasped hands with the man before they backed off. As they raised their fists Suria looked up at Isabella. “Do you think he has a chance?”

Bella shook her head, smiling widely. “No one does, Red. No one.”