Return to Wardate (28 page)

‘ee air-ul,
ownt am-ige air-ee-ing,’ said Madeline.

The monitor
displayed a typical android throat – like inside a drain pipe. Half
way down, her voice box could clearly be seen – a neat circular
cluster of small loud speakers. Adam pushed the endoscope as far
down her throat as he could. Right at the bottom, what was clearly
the ultrasound emitter finally came into view. A ten centimetre
diameter circular device with several radiating veins pointing
upwards.

‘Oory u!’ said
Madeline.

The ultrasound
was noticeably interfering with the display. Adam had to act
quickly. The light of the end of the endoscope suddenly illuminated
a small loop of thick red wire.

‘There you are,
you little beauty. Steady… keep still… nearly there…’

Adam operated
the cutting tool on the endoscope – snip! The wire was too thick to
cut in one go. Again Adam operated the cutting tool – snip!

‘One more snip
should do it!’ he yelled.

Another cut and
that was it, the ultrasound immediately stopped and her mouth
closed.

The operation
was successful. Adam withdrew the endoscope and for no apparent
reason, rinsed it under the tap.

‘Thank god for
that!’ said Madeline.

‘Your operation
went smoothly and without incident Madam. We anticipate a full
recovery within the next couple of seconds,’ said Adam
professionally.

‘Nothing to
say… Nuttall?’ said Madeline.

‘
I suppose
the ultrasound emitter has already served its purpose. It’s too
late now, you’ve missed your passage home,’
said Nuttall
through her audio circuits.

On the way back
through the corridors, the staff, visitors and patients who had
tried to attack Madeline were now rousing. It was all very puzzling
to them – How could they possibly harm a hair on her head? Madeline
was actually a lovely, lovely girl. She had every right in stunning
them with what ever it was that came out of her finger.

‘What now?’
Adam asked.

‘We have to get
high up,’ said Madeline.

‘How about the
C N Tower?’ Adam suggested.

‘About
seventeen times higher than that.’

‘You’re talking
Everest then?’

The Vixen News
channel was still tuned in on the TV in the now, unoccupied
nondescript motel room.

‘
Good
evening, this is Carol Star keeping you in touch with the latest
news from around the globe. Reports are coming through of an
incident in Quito municipal hospital in Ecuador. Late this
afternoon, over forty people including Doctors, Nurses and patients
collapsed - fainted – we don’t really know. Let’s go live, to the
hospital where Berny Carp takes up the story.
’

‘
Yes, Carol.
By the way, you’re looking radiant today... another strange event,
this time in Ecuador. No one has, as yet come up with an
explanation for this passing out en masse.’
said Berny.

‘
Could it
have been a virus by any chance?’
asked Carol.

‘
I don’t
think so but we have just received CCTV footage inside the hospital
at the time… and you’ll never guess who has been captured on the
cameras?
’

‘
No, you’re
kidding!? Not our Madeline again?’

‘
Afraid so!
The one and only, as you can see on the playback footage,’
said
Berny
.

‘
Hmm, pink
and white, carnation pink I believe. I don’t know… Barby dollish
don’t you think? The green beam of light coming out of her finger
definitely clashes. Err… what exactly is that beam of light?’
asked Carol.

‘
They
believe it’s just interference. Does look like a laser beam though,
doesn’t it?’

‘
Just listen
to ourselves. We’ll be believing in Martians next!’
Carol
chuckled.

‘
Perhaps
that’s it! Madeline is a Martian!’
suggested Berny.

‘
Well, we
certainly love Martians then,
’ said Carol.

‘
We
certainly do,
’ said Berny.

‘
Thanks
Berny… Only Vixen News keeps you informed. Stay tuned for more
important updates on Madeline’s ever changing fashion. Moving on to
other news… Reports are coming in from the middle east of a
cataclysmic event. The Dead Sea has apparently flooded. Over to our
correspondent in Jericho... Hello Ed, what can you tell us about
this freak event?’

‘
Hi Carol,
carnation pink and white eh? I’m sure it’ll catch on… Yes well the
Dead Sea has indeed flooded. Scientists have apportioned blame to
the recent controversial Antarctica explosion. Apparently there’s a
fault line in the Earth’s crust that runs all the way from
Antarctica, across the Pacific, up the Red Sea and the Gulf of
Aqaba, northwards up to the Red Sea. They say the shock wave
travelled up the fault line and opened up a rift between Aqaba and
the north end of the Dead Sea,’
explained Ed.

‘
And water
flooded in I suppose,
’ said Carol.

‘
Exactly
right - like a tsunami - literally flooded the area in
minutes.’

‘
Any
casualties?
’ asked Carol indifferently.

‘
Well this
is the strange part, normally there wouldn’t have been hardly any
but recently a group of some five hundred people have settled
there. They apparently named the place the village of COLEY for
some reason.’

‘
Sea not
dead anymore then?
’ suggested Carol.

‘
Indeed
not!’
said Ed.

Chapter 41:
Passport control freak

Everest was
indeed seventeen times higher than the CN tower. It was also on the
other side of the world – ten thousand miles away. However this
aside, there was a more immediate problem, Madeline didn’t have a
passport. There was a reason for this, up until now, she hadn’t
required one. All her recent worldwide travel had been by
privileged jet fighter transport. Regardless, they decided to try
and get through passport control without this essential little
paper book. Of course this was impossible despite the fact that
most people now loved the feisty, possibly Martian, fashion icon
Madeline Bull who had saved the world many, many times. Passport
control had to be firm, rules were rules no matter who you were. At
first Madeline used her skills but her temporary enlarged boobs
didn’t work on the female member of staff. She tried the dippy
approach but she was too well known for that to work. Eventually
she stamped the ground with her designer leather boots, protested
vigorously and made a scene; this attracted much attention – which
conveniently included Vixen News.

‘
Breaking
news, reports are coming in of our Madeline causing a stir at Quito
airport. Berny is on the scene… So, Berny, what’s the
latest?
’

‘
Hi Carol,
yes, apparently our beloved Madeline Bull tried to take a flight
without a passport. She’s claiming that someone stole it whilst she
was in the queue.’

‘
Can’t they
turn a blind eye, after all it is Madeline Bull?
’

‘
You’d think
so but rules are rules,’
said Berny
.

‘
I notice
that she’s still in the Barbie doll colours – definitely growing on
me.’

‘
Yes, me
too! Believe it or not, shops are selling out of carnation pink
clothes.’

Yes, it was an
embarrassing and frustrating time for Madeline. She had an arsenal
of high tech weaponry about her person but none could
circumnavigate this problem. If she farted and everyone in passport
control went to sleep it wouldn’t really achieve anything.
Similarly her laser would only irritate the officials. Adam tried
to calm her down but she was steadily becoming more and more
irritated and upset.

‘Please… I just
want to go home!’ she cried. It’s
my
dream, why can’t things
happen the way
I
want them to.’

Adam continued
with his attempt to console her but this was such a silly, silly
thing stopping her. She had recently been frozen to death and
almost nuked in Antarctica and then frozen to death again at the
top of Mount Chimborazo. However, these set backs were minor
compared to the problem she was now facing with a jobs-worth
passport control officer.

‘Is the nothing
I can do?’ she pleaded.

‘You will have
to apply for a new passport Madam - which could take up to two
months,’ replied a youthful overweight uniformed girl with loops of
shiny metal in various parts of her formerly pretty face.

It was about to
become a no win situation when her internal mobile phone rang – she
answered it.

‘
Madeline?
It’s Zol, Zol Pidem
.’

‘Yes, what do
you want and how’ve you got my number?’ said Madeline angrily. She
was not in the mood to talk to one of Nuttall’s friends.

‘
I’ll take
you to Lukla,’
said Zol.

‘Lukla? Where
the hell’s that?’ asked Madeline.

‘
Mount
Everest base camp.’

Another voice
now joined in on her internal audio system.

‘
What the
hell are you doing, Pidem?
’ raged Nuttall.

‘
For god’s
sake man, face reason, she needs to go home. I’ve poured half a
billion dollars into your hair brained scheme and all it’s done is
give us a bit more time. Just give in, she wants to go home,
’
said Zol.

‘
Have you
kept your ear devices in? You fucking idiot, you haven’t, have you?
I warned you about the effects. You’ve gone and got yourself
emotionally attached. Come to your senses, if she gets to Everest
and wakes up, we’ll all die – everyone will die – cease to
exist,
’ raged Nuttall.

‘
We won’t
die, we will still be in her memories,
’ said Zol calmly.

‘
What, a
couple of minutes every now and then? I want more life than
that!’
said Nuttall.

‘
I’m taking
her and that’s that. She gave us life. We have to be grateful for
what we’ve had,
’ said Zol.

‘
Not good
enough!! I’ll stop you!’
threatened Nuttall.

‘Thank you… Mr
Pidem. I’ll accept you kind offer,’ said a grateful Madeline.

Madeline’s
inner conversations were always a little disconcerting for Adam.
One side of the conversation rarely gave the full picture of what
was going on. When there were two inner voices inside her head and
not particularly talking to the head they were in, all Adam had to
go on were her limited facial expressions.

‘What’s going
on?’ asked Adam.

‘Pidem’s taking
us!’

‘Oh, we’re
trusting him now, are we?’

Madeline
couldn’t give a reply. She just shrugged her shoulders and gave him
a look that basically meant, what choice do I have.

Zol Pidem was
the man who had funded the whole MI 7 charade and paid for the base
in Antarctica. It was his money that had been used to set the world
at each others throats and conditionally program every human on the
planet. He had funded the alterations to Madeline’s body to make
her a mobile ultrasound emitter and whilst they were at,
indestructible. It has to be said though; he owned an awful lot of
gold. After the Fort Knox heist and subsequent eradication of the
gold, the precious metal had dramatically increased in value. This
conveniently resulted in him having a net gain in his wealth
despite all his outgoing.

Zol Pidem was
fundamental to all Madeline’s problems in this world and now… he
was offering to help her. What could she think? What option did she
have?

No one could
possibly say that saving the world from extinction was a bad thing
– no one could blame Nuttall or Pidem for what they had done. It
was purely self preservation, a natural instinct. Madeline decided
that sometimes you just have to trust people – no matter how rich
they are.

Chapter 42:
Marmite on toast

For a small
nine seater Learjet, Quito, (Ecuador) to Lukla, (Nepal) was an epic
journey – these places were almost the antipodes of each other. It
would take four hops, resting and refuelling in between. The stops
ideally would be somewhere in Florida, Alaska, Russia and Mongolia.
It would be hugely challenging for the pilot with at least twenty
four hours flying time, over some of the remotest, desolate parts
of the Earth.

Madeline and
Adam had to wait a day for the personal jet to arrive. Another day
of shopping would have probably killed Adam so he persuaded her to
do a spot of sight seeing around Quito instead. Even sight seeing
though, brought on another headache but then he realised it was the
altitude. Of course Madeline had no such problem, altitude didn’t
affect her as she (Poppy) was actually - probably in Buxton
England. True, Buxton’s claim to fame was that it was the highest
town in England but Quito was eight and a half times higher – the
highest city in the world. It was ever likely Adam’s head was
pounding like it was He dearly hoped the Learjet was pressurised as
the aspirins weren’t working at all.

The Learjet
landed smoothly on a private runway just outside Quito and taxied
almost right up to Madeline’s and Adam’s feet. Zol Pidem greeted
them and welcomed them on board. They half expected him not to be
there, passing the mammoth task on to one of his minions but he was
true to his word – he was taking them.

Madeline got
quite annoyed that, despite the fact that she had saved the world
many times and was known throughout the world she still had to have
a passport to basically prove who she was. However if you had loads
of money, enough to own your own private jet, you could bypass all
that bureaucratic authoritarian crap. Of course that was life, it
was and always would be money that pulled strings, opened doors and
enabled you to avoid confrontations with officious immature,
overweight, pincushions.