Ride To The Edge (Lucifer's Saints MC) (Rough Riders MC Series Book 4) (12 page)

“As much as the fuckin’ Angles, Saxons, and those fuckin’ Scandinavians didn’t fuck outta my family.” His gray eyes darkened with anger. “Both my parents were from the Emerald Isle but you know how us Irish aren’t as pure as we like to claim. We got almost every fuckin’ tribe in Europe in our veins though we remain proud Celts through and through.”

“Jude Kelly is my cousin, Hardy,” Chemist spoke up. “His dad and my mother are siblings. I gotta admit my uncle was a piece of work and his ma wasn’t too much better but he’s been with the Barstow chapter for three years.”

My icy glance turned toward Chemist. “What’s he doin’ here?”

Chemist cleared his throat. “He had a spot of trouble in Barstow. Damn near beat a Demon’s Bastard to fuckin’ within an inch of death but they don’t know it was him who did it. He just high tailed it outta there and told his brothers his cousin had an emergency he had to deal with in Vegas. Ronan spoke to Rucker and he approved the transfer. Didn’t even ask for a guy in return. Said that he wanted to keep shit quiet for a while and get the cops off their backs.”

I stood from my seat after downing another shot of JD and walked over to Razr. “What’s your story kid? Them bruises on your sunburnt arms ain’t fresh and I don’t deal with cutters in my club. In fact, I don’t deal with fuckups, full stop.”

I strode around him doing a full turn. “Technically, you’re not a Vegas brother until I say you’re one. Ronan is VP but I can override his decision and every motherfucker who voted for you to be in our club. I’ve already had to put down a mad dog in my club—called himself Schizo and this was in my London charter. It was twice the size of my Vegas charter but let me tell you somethin’, you little shit, you start frothing at the mouth, losin’ your temper and slicing up your flesh—me and you ain’t got no ties. I’ll put a bullet in your head the same way I did Schizo . . . and I don’t give a shit whether you’re full blood Irish or that Chemist is your cousin. I don’t deal with psychos in my club, full
fuckin’
stop. You understand me, son?”

Razr’s dead eyes livened to the point where I knew I scared the living crap out of him. He wasn’t Schizo, and I wanted to make damn well sure he knew where I was coming from the jump. I wasn’t gonna deal with anyone’s bullshit.

“The cuts are from my dad.” He met my eyes reluctantly. “I’ve got scars all over my body from that drunk motherfucker including cigarette burns on my thighs, and marks from belt buckles on my back. I don’t cut myself but I will cut a motherfucker who threatens me, my brothers or my club.”

He strolled casually around me before he stopped once we were face to face again. “I may have been a victim when I was young but all that shit stopped when I was fifteen and I stabbed that useless son of whore to death after he fucked me with a beer bottle and then proceeded to fuck me himself. I ain’t got nothin’ to hide.”

“And your ma?”

“What the fuck was she gonna do when he had her whorin’ on the streets, keeping him in meth, crack, booze, heroin or what ever fuckin’ drug of choice he was usin’ at the time? She did what she could to protect me but ain’t much an alcoholic street walker whose five feet, two inches and ninety pounds soakin’ wet gonna do against a six foot five, two hundred and fifty pound motherfucking sadist who just gets off on hurting people. He was weak, a loser so he took it out on my mom and me. But that’s life—shit sucks, people move on and grow up. I ain’t my sorry sack of shit dad if that’s what you’re askin’.”

I finally smiled before I embraced the guy in a manly hug. “Welcome to the Vegas charter, brother. I think you’ll like it just fine here.”

He looked around with a smirk on his face. “Well the pussy is more upscale than in Barstow—”

“Watch yourself with these bitches,” I warned, “and
wear
a fucking condom. Ain’t no way in hell I want any of these slappers as any man in here’s ol’ lady. The quality pussy is to be had at the brothel. You can look and touch but most of the ladies have a deadline. If you’re lookin’ for ol’ lady material, I’d ask your cousin about where to find it ‘cause it’s not up in here tonight. Have fun, get drunk, get your rocks off but remember what I said. They’re just pussy—nothin’ more and nothin’ less. They signed up for this shit so don’t give them respect they haven’t fuckin’ earned.”

“Do you talk to your old lady with that dirty mouth?” a strong, feminine voice asked.

I turned around to see Naomi and headed back to the bar. “No but then I don’t think I’ve ever addressed you that way, either. Ronan, looks like it’s time for you to either go or sober the fuck up.”

Ronan stalked over to Naomi and guided her out of the club house into the overly warm Vegas night but I had a feeling it smelled a hell of a lot better outside than it did in here, regardless of the air conditioning.

I missed my woman but at the same time, it was obvious that I also needed to bring more law and order to my club than what I was asserting at this point. I dug my Samsung out of my pocket and texted her.

Me: When you get done, wanna come down to the clubhouse? Working late.

Talia: Ugh, you know how much I hate those pussy parties…

Me: How are you responding so fast?

Talia: I do get breaks you know. Almost done here. Gotta do one more take and I’ll see you soon.

Me: Thx xx

Talia: Welcome… where’s my xoxo?

Me: I’ll xoxo your pussy instead.

Talia: Ohh, talk dirty to me & I’ll finish faster… xx ;-)

Me: Hopin you’d say that :-)

I smiled and poured myself another shot of JD. My ol’ lady couldn’t get here fast enough as far as I was concerned. I needed some pussy and I needed it bad.

“C
hrist, is this night ever gonna end? Some of us had plans ya know.”

I leaned back on my stool and easily gave Seth a death glare he wouldn’t forget anytime soon. “Your piece of barely legal pussy can wait. I want to finish up this track and then we can all get outta here. If you’d stop thinkin’ about gettin’ your dick sucked and focused on the your guitar solo then we’d all be someplace else right now. Unless you’d rather I just give it to Kris? I mean, he’s got a broken pinky but I think he’d nail it better than you.”

Seth grabbed his guitar and stood. “I’m so fuckin’ tired about all these stupid fuckin’ songs about your fucked up relationships with me and Jaden. Can’t you write a catchy tune every now and then?”

“Actually, Talia, Kris and I wrote it together,” Linx said in a voice cold enough to drop the temperature in the room to arctic. “The lyrics, I mean. We all just took the pain and hurt of our shitty relationships in the past and came up with a great song. Or did you not read the credits for who wrote the lyrics and just
assumed
everything has to be about you?”

“I’m just sayin’—”

“What, exactly?” Kris cut him off. “We’re just tellin’ you that every song about a shitty relationship doesn’t have to do with you or isn’t written solely by Talia just like every hardcore love song isn’t always written by Linx and me. Talia wrote our first single and damn, what a single it’s gonna be and guess what, dickwad—it’s upbeat and catchy. They’ll play it on Octane and the local rock stations. Hell, we might even make the pop stations with this one. So shut the fuck up, do your guitar solo the way it should be so we can get the fuck outta here ‘cause
you’re
the one that’s holdin’ us up!”

Seth flipped Kris off and went back into his glass booth.

“And here I thought being in a band with a bunch of guys would be less drama,” I kidded to Linx, Kris and Niko.

“Well . . .” Niko trailed off.

“What?” I asked almost reluctantly.

Kris looked at Linx. “You’re married to her cousin. You should tell her.”

“Tell me what?” My blood had begun to boil and that was not a good thing when all I could think of myself was getting to the clubhouse and fucking Hardy’s brains out.

“He’s usin’ again.” Linx just let the words hang in the air like dust motes and I swear I would have clobbered him with a mic if I had one in my hand.

“For how long?” My voice was so soft I knew the guys barely heard me.

“A few months,” Niko spoke up. “We didn’t wanna tell you ‘cause this chick he’s fuckin’ around with got pregnant and then it was a situation of should they keep the baby or not. She decided to keep it and Seth’s freakin’ out.”

I shrugged my shoulders in apathy. “Why? If you guys knew he was using again then you should have told me. I’m not going to fire him—I don’t have that kind of power—”

“But Dominic does and if he knows he’s usin’ again, he’ll be outta a job with a baby on the way by a nineteen year old girl who barely graduated from high school,” Kris said in a matter of fact tone.

“Listen, I wouldn’t let Dominic do that to him. He’s my fucking ex-boyfriend. Just because I am in love with someone else doesn’t mean I don’t care about him!”

Niko smirked at Linx who just looked at me with bright blue eyes. “Now you know how I feel about Trista.”

“Yeah, I do but . . . no more babies . . . at least until she’s twenty-one for Christ’s sake. You’ve got three and though she technically only has one by you, she’s young. Let her live a little, all right?”

“So what are we going to do?” Kris inquired, always the pragmatic one.

“He’ll get clean while we go on the road. You should be in tiptop shape and no one’s gonna miss Seth. No offense but we’ve been carrying his ass just so he could pay back Introspect for his stay at Promises and so he’d be gettin’ a steady paycheck. If it were up to me, we’d be a four-person band. Hell, I know how to play acoustic guitar and I know it’s not the same as electric but you could teach me, Kris. We’ve been splittin’ money five ways when one of us doesn’t deserve a dime.”

I stared at the guys and knew they felt the same way I did. “I’m not sayin’ this ‘cause he’s my ex but you all know what he did to me—Niko and Linx, you know better than anyone. Kris came into all this after the fact but you knew the words he was claimin’ as his own weren’t and that he stole my poems, made them into songs and took the credit. If I was a vindictive person, I coulda sued him but I didn’t want any divisions in the band. The music is what matters, am I right?”

Linx and Niko both nodded their heads wordlessly.

“Well then, can we please get this song outta the way so we can all be somewhere else besides stuck in this goddamn studio?”

“What happens to Seth?”

I stared at Niko for a long time. “We both know he has to go. I’ll make sure he’s paid his royalties for this album and Dominic treats him fairly. We can stay a quartet but my only demand is that we find some more estrogen. I’m fine with a female rhythm guitarist.”

“What about Hailey Rhodes?”

“The British chick that leads Rule?”

“Well, she did until they kicked her out, the record company then dropped the band and now they’re all floundering,” Kris continued. “She’s a great rhythm guitarist and yeah, I could teach you how to play but I’d rather hire someone who knows what they’re doin’.”

My mind began to wander as Kris’ eyes lit up as he talked about her. She was hot and I had no physical attraction to women in any way but I could recognize beauty in a man or a woman when I saw it. Hailey’s smooth tan-brown skin, long straight black hair with lavender streaks, intriguing mismatched eyes where one iris was gray and the other blue in a gorgeous face made up of her father’s Anglo features while she had her black American mother’s high cheekbones and plush lips. As if all that perfection wasn’t enough, she’d been blessed with a body Kim Kardashian would be jealous of because her curves were natural, in proportion to her body, and purely feminine. It made me realize while all the guys suddenly thought she’d be a great replacement for Seth.

I knew Kris was the only band member who was supposedly single since he’d abruptly ended his engagement to Kasper Gillian’s ex-wife almost six months ago. However, the way he spoke about Hailey made me wonder if they were more than just friends.

“Are you fucking her?” I asked him.

His fair Finnish complexion turned crimson, and that was all the answer I needed to know.

“Since she’s out of a job, get her ass over to the States as soon as possible. She’s gonna have to learn the songs so she can go on tour with us and finish up the rest of this album. I’ve had it with Seth. We’ll do this song tonight and tomorrow, we get on the phone with Dominic and end it amicably as possible.” I breathed deeply before I faced the guys again. “I can deal with a lot but drug use isn’t one of them—and I’m not talking about marijuana or the occasional use of cocaine. You wanna get high on your own time, have at it. It’s not my fucking business but I won’t deal with meth, heroin, MDMA, oxy or any other pharmaceutical shit that turns your brain to mush.

“This is a job, not a motherfuckin’ hobby. We get paid to perform. I take moments I could be spending with my children to be here, and my time is very fucking valuable—as is all of yours—so I won’t have it wasted by someone who can’t control the substances they use to get through the day. Fuck that noise.”

“Are we gonna finish the song?” Linx inquired.

“Yeah but if Hailey’s performance is better than hers will just be replaced over Seth’s. In the meantime, I want to lay down this track so we can all get the hell out of here.”

“There’s no if,” Kris began as he stood and picked up his guitar, “because her performance will be better than his hands down.”

I turned to smile at Kris. “If you’re so sure then send her a copy tomorrow. Or better yet, after we get done in the studio, why don’t you just call her and surprise her with a plane ticket?”

“That’s a good idea. Why didn’t I think of that?”

“No clue. You’re a man, Kris—I always thought you guys thought with your dicks.”

Niko, Linx and I all stood, making our way to our booths so we could get this song out of the way. The sooner I finished, the quicker I could return to Hardy and the pussy party they were having at the clubhouse.

I wasn’t worried, mostly because Hardy wasn’t the type of man to cheat on a woman under any circumstances. Especially a woman he loved with all his heart. It wasn’t in him to be untrue, be deceitful or lie—at least not to me. What he did in his professional life was completely different and had nothing to do with me. I didn’t ask because I didn’t want to know.

The Hardy that had murdered in cold blood, beat men half to death, sold the very drugs I detested to adults who knew better for money wasn’t anyone I wanted to be associated with so I remained blind to his life outside of being a loving husband, a good father and wonderful family man.

Ignorance was bliss and I enjoyed my life just fine, slept at night and rested comfortably knowing the man by my side had a duality to rival a Gemini but that it was none of my business. Hell, Hardy was a Gemini to my Leo but that never made any difference to me. I didn’t place too much stock in astrological signs and what not.

I waited in the booth, with nothing but my earphones and mouth close to the mic, ready to belt out the song. When it was my turn, I took it and sang the lyrics the only way I knew how—with that raw, emotional feeling fused with the pain of what might have been.

Love and lies,

You caught me by surprise

Couldn’t look me in the eyes

Wouldn’t recognize you and I

How could you?

See what you put me through

Don’t think I’ll ever snitch

But still I wont be just your bitch

I listened for my cue and then the chorus came and I got lost in the moment again.

Can’t stop all the pain

You must believe that I’m insane

Just because you snared me

Doesn’t mean you truly have me

Cannot be with you

After all I see what’s inside of you

Rotten from the inside out

Why can’t I scream and shout

Make you apologize

Eat all those words of lies

Can’t bring myself to cry

No excuses, just say goodbye

I continued on because I needed to finish this song tonight and purge every hurtful memory of Jaden and Seth away.

Then you tried to lead me on

Thinkin’ I’d never be gone

But I fooled you in the end,

No, we can’t be friends

Nothing exists between us anymore

Can’t believe it’s you I used to adore

Fuck me once, shame on you, fuck me twice, shame on me

No I never will regret the fact that you upped and left me

The chorus took me away to a time between Jaden and I. How couldn’t I have not seen we weren’t meant to be together? I didn’t even realize tears flowed from my eyes until I began to sing again.