Rising Tide: Dark Innocence (The Maura DeLuca Trilogy Book 1) (9 page)

It seemed we were getting closer,
whether I wanted it to happen or not.

The rest of the day was just as
much fun…mostly.  I did end up getting sick somewhere between our ‘drive’
on the Turnpike and the walk through Noah’s Ark.  At that point, I didn’t
know if it was the rides or all the junk food we’d consumed.  As much as I
didn’t want to admit it, it was probably the sun.  Ron and I were munching
on a funnel cake—after the cotton candy and gravy-covered fries we’d
consumed—sitting on a bench out in the open.  I’d felt hot and queasy, but
had told myself it was nothing and tried to ignore it, desperately wishing for
once to be normal.  When it was too late, I realized the mistake I’d
made.  I ran, humiliated, for the nearest bathroom. 

When I’d finally emerged, even
paler than usual and sweating, Ron was waiting worriedly, right outside. 
“Are you okay?”

“I’ll be fine,” I promised. 

“You really get sick when you’re
out in the sun?” he raised an eyebrow questioningly. 

“Yea, make me feel worse about it!”
was what I felt like shouting at him, but settled for just, “Yea.”  I bit
my tongue to keep from saying any more.  I felt irrationally angry, but
fought to control it.

He took me into his arms in a rush,
surprising me and melting away my irritation.  “It’s okay, Maura.  It
must be really hard to put up with that.” 

I’d been expecting him to treat me
like the freak I knew I was or make fun of me, and
this
was his
reaction?  He was just too sweet…too understanding.  And I was
leaving him behind in less than a month.

“I think we should get you home,”
he said softly.  He was running a hand over my back, comfortingly, on top
of my hair.

I didn’t want the day to be
over.  I wanted to have a fun day like any other normal, teenage
girl.  “No!” I blurted out, with more violence than I’d wanted to put into
my voice, “I don’t want to go yet.”  I knew how excited Shane was too, and
would really hate to ruin the day for him and Merina.  Though she might
actually thank me—he’d dragged her off to the Phantom’s Revenge again.

Ron pulled back to look at me
disapprovingly.  But I was formulating a plan.  “I know!  I just
need to get inside and cool down for a bit!  We can go on the haunted
house ride and then the Exterminator!”  I didn’t wait for an answer, but
boldly snatched up his hand to drag him towards my goal, robbing him of the
opportunity to dissuade me from my brilliant plan. 

“Maura…you want to go on more rides
after being sick?”

I put on my brightest smile before
turning to him.  “You worry too much!  I’m fine, feel much better
now.  I mean what do you expect when you mix gravy and cotton candy?”

He really had no argument for that.

I added for good measure, “Come
on!  I’m so excited to see the new ride!  I’ve never been on
Ghostwood Estate before.”

Shane must have caught up to us in
time to hear where we were going.  “Yea, bro, when the girls get scared
they can grab onto us for protection!” he boomed behind us.

Yes!  I had an ally.  Ron
must have liked the picture his friend was formulating, “Hmmm, that is
true.”  I didn’t have to drag him now.

It turned out that the haunted
house was just what I needed.  It was cool and velvety dark inside and my
stomach settled almost immediately.  Shane was bubbling over with
excitement, because this ride involved the use of ghost guns.  The premise
of the ride was that the spirit-filled mansion was overcrowded, and riders
needed to help exterminate part of its populace.

Shane went into Rambo mode,
shooting every target in site, causing spooks to pop out at us from the
darkness and making Merina squeal with fright every time.

I jumped a little now and then, but
it took a lot more to frighten me than this.  Katie Parker was much more
macabre than any of the ghouls on this ride.

“Aren’t you scared?” Ron asked at
my ear, trying to be heard over Shane’s enthusiastic battle cries.  He
sounded a little disappointed.

A grisly-looking skeleton erupted
from one of the walls.  I feigned being frightened and smashed myself
against Ron’s shoulder, burying my face into his shirt.  I squealed loudly
for effect…then grinned up at him a few moments later.  “Is that better?”

Even in the gloom, I saw him roll
his eyes, but he molded his arm into my side to crush me even closer to
him.  The cuddling throughout the remainder of the ride seriously
interfered with his shooting ability, so it was no surprise that Shane’s
shooting score was almost double what Ron ended up with.

“Ha!  I kicked your butt!”
Shane danced around us elated, almost shoving his condemning finger into Ron’s
face.

Ron shrugged slightly and hugged me
against his side, “Eh…I’ll take the tradeoff.”  Nothing could have wiped
the dizzied smile from my face.

Ron made us ride again twice—Shane
ecstatic because he had the highest score every time except the last go
around—determined to keep me out of the sun for as long as possible.  We
walked to The Exterminator next, Ron quietly smug about beating Shane, by quite
a large margin on that last ride.  Shane made him swear to a rematch right
after we finished the next ride, which meant Ron could keep me in the dark a
little longer.  Poor Merina.

But when I looked back at them, she
wore a dreamy look on her face, and I realized she didn’t care at all what we
were doing as long as Shane was with her. 

Ron kept us to the shadows as much
as he could, as we made our way to the indoor coaster.  It was perfect,
even the line was indoors…and deliciously air-conditioned.  It was part of
the ride’s effect, making the waiting area part of the underground utility
sewer, where monstrous rats supposedly lurked.

“You’re feeling better now.” 
It wasn’t really a question Ron casually said into my ear, escaping our
companions’ notice.

“Oh yea.  This is great. 
I’ve never had so much fun!”  I allowed myself to hug him.  It wasn’t
such a forbidden move.  He was already standing so close to me, and it
wasn’t like there hadn’t been contact between us all day.  It seemed like
once you moved past that first touch, all the ones that followed occurred
naturally.  Especially with him.  Ron seemed to draw me to him,
pulling me, as if by some gravitational force.  The more I was close to
him, the more I touched him, the stronger the pull seemed to
become.   Moving or not, I was disappointed in myself to discover
that I was far past the point of being able to resist any longer.

But, as I held him here, oblivious
to Shane, Merina and all the strangers around us, there was that nagging
question that I had to have an answer to.  I knew I couldn’t put it off
any longer…if I wanted to retain my sanity.

We were almost the same height, he
only had three inches on me, so it wasn’t a stretch for me to turn my head to
whisper into his ear, “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.” 

I took a deep breath and felt my
heart rate increase.  I shifted my feet, nervousness moving my body. 

He inclined his head back to peer
at me then, “Is it that bad?”

Maybe it was.  I flushed and
tried again—unsuccessfully—to force the question from my mind into my mouth.

The warm smile again, “You can ask
me
any
thing, Maura.”

I took another deep breath and
asked in a rush, “Is there anyone else that you’re, you know…like this with?”

He seemed confused by my question.

I knew I would have to make myself
more clear.  “Do you,” I gulped before continuing, “have anyone else you
like in the same way you like me?”  I looked down after finishing. 
Half horrified, half relieved to have the words finally spoken.

When he didn’t answer, I forced
myself to look up at him again.  He still appeared confused, but this time
like he was mulling something over in his head.  I hoped I wouldn’t have
to say anything further…because I didn’t think I’d be capable of speaking
again, my throat was so tightly constricted with anxiety.

In a moment I understood where his
thoughts had been treading.  “Did I do something to make you think that?”
he asked scrutinizing my eyes.

“No!”  I answered, I knew, too
quickly.

“Well, you might think I’m silly,”
he answered, his face very serious, “but I just have this feeling that you—and
only you—could ever be the one for me.”

“Oh.”  My chest was
tight.  The feeling was a convoluted mixture of pure joy and crippling
despair.  How could you remain someone’s one and only if you were
thousands of miles away from them?

“That’s good,” I breathed a second
later.  But I could tell he saw the sadness in my expression, because his
eyes mirrored their own back to me.

Luckily, at that moment, we came up
to the cars, our turn to board.  I turned away to wipe at the moisture in
my eyes, not wanting to add to the gloomy emotion I’d seen reflected back in
his stare.

This ride was not as calm as the
haunted mansion had been.  The coaster was of the wild mouse variety. 
Although there weren’t any huge hills ending in steep drops, the cars moved in
a crazed, winding way with a lot of jerks and sudden turns, making Merina
shriek in protest.  I was still dwelling on the conversation Ron and I had
just had, so I wasn’t properly enjoying the twists and turns of the ride. 
I glanced sideways at him to see he was absorbed in thought, as well.  I
nudged him in the ribs to lighten the mood, and he smiled, but it seemed like
too automatic of a response.

We rode this coaster twice more,
and by the end of the third time, we were both smiling and laughing
again.  The ride’s craziness made it hard to maintain a solemn
attitude. 

Afterwards, of course, Ron dragged
me back to Ghostwood Estate.  By the time we rode that again three
times—with Shane becoming less enthusiastic with the shooting competition,
given the growing monotony of the ride—I had been, mostly, indoors for nearly
two hours. 

When we came off the last ride, I
gave a big sigh of relief.  Pittsburgh was ringed by the Appalachian
Mountains and the scant cloud cover that had started when we were coming back
from the Exterminator was now a thick, dark mass covering the sky. 

“Awww man,” Shane scowled up at the
sky, “looks like it’s gonna rain.”

But I smiled.  No more getting
sick for me.  Out of the corner of my eye I saw Ron studying me, a look on
his face like he was trying to figure out a math problem.  He touched his
hand to the top of mine, not exactly taking it.  I started to feel very
uncomfortable under his scrutiny.

I looked at Shane.  “Hey, if
you want to take in the rest of the coasters, we’d better hurry.”  I
looked at Ron and faked nonchalance, “What time is it anyway?” I asked.

“Almost two,” he looked as
surprised as I felt.  Time must really fly when you’re having fun.

“Ack! I’ll have to go in about an
hour if I’m going to have dinner ready for when Mom gets home!”

Ron bargained, “How about we make
it two and I’ll ‘come over’ with pizza.”

“But I’m grounded…or I’m supposed
to be.” 

“Well, I’m not taking you
anywhere.  And your mom can’t blame you if I just show up.”  He
looked very impressed with himself.

“Hmmm that’s true,” I didn’t mull
it over very long.  “Ok, deal!  Now let’s go.”  I slipped my
hand around his and dragged him along to follow Shane, who was already several
feet ahead of us. 

First, we were lead to the Jack
Rabbit and then the Thunderbolt, both wooden coasters, both enormously
fun.  Next we moved on to The Racer.  I had no trouble standing in
line-ups now, and even chatted—nervously at first—with Merina.  She was a
sweet girl, very shy and practical.  The way she spoke to me reminded me
of the way I interacted with others, very tentative at first, gradually
building confidence as the conversation progressed.  I looked her over,
but could see nothing about her that would bring ridicule from others.  I
wondered why she was so timid.  I knew my own reasons.

She and Shane were in the same
geometry class, and she’d met him when he’d offered to tutor her after they’d
gotten back their last test.

“I failed so badly!”  She
blushed when she admitted this and even more when Shane teased her.

“It’s only because you had other
things to concentrate on,” he indicated himself.

“Yea, you’re ugly enough to
distract anyone,” Ron remarked.

“Hey!”  The pair moved away
from me and Merina so they could grapple with each other as much as was
possible in the cramped space allotted to us in line. 

“Oh boy…” I sighed, grinning and
rolling my eyes.  Merina laughed, and I now had someone else to miss.

We ended up riding the racing
coasters three times, as Ron was sufficiently humiliated by Shane’s bragging to
call for a rematch, and the second time ended in a tie.  Our team came in
first, but when Shane started to demand another try, it was Merina who came to
my defense.

“Come on now, Shane, it’s time to
go!  You don’t want to get Maura in any trouble do you?”

He appraised me with narrowed
eyes.  “I have seen your mother’s wrath and do not wish to call that down
upon you…I guess.”

“Thank you,” I answered,
laughing.  Shane was just too funny.  “I’m really sorry I have to be
the one to make everyone leave early, though.”

Ron’s arm came around my
shoulders.  “I’m starting to get sick myself.  I’ve had enough of
being tossed around for today.”

I smiled up at him, but knew mine was
no match for the warmth his held.

Ron dropped me off at the house
with a promise to be back in an hour with the pizza.  I flew through the
rooms, picking up anything that was out of place. I barely remembered to change
my sweater before hearing Caelyn pull into the driveway.  She knew I was
of the opinion it was too special to wear to school.

I ran into the kitchen to greet
her, hoping my face wasn’t too flushed from all my efforts.  I’d changed
into my least childishly-patterned pajamas, deciding it was too dangerous to
act like I’d been to school, when the risk of discovery was too high.  It
would also make it seem like I wasn’t expecting Ron to come over at all.

She came in with a bag of groceries
cradled in one arm.

“Oh Mom!  I could have helped
you with those,” I ran to take the bag from her.

“It’s okay, Maura.”  I guess
you were sick today?”  The school must have called her at work!  Good
thing I didn’t try to act like I’d been there all day!

“Yea, stomach flu.  But I feel
a lot better now.”

She seemed to grow overly concerned
when I’d said that , “Did you throw up?”  She put the bag down on the
counter, ignoring my attempts to take it, and put a hand to my forehead.

“Yes, Mom,” at least that part
wasn’t complete untruth, “but I’m fine.  I said I feel better.  I
even kept some food down.”  I didn’t like the way she was
overreacting.  She seemed to do a lot of that lately.

“Your face is all red,” the back of
her hand was now pressed against a cheek.

“Mom…”  I heard his car. 
Stupidly, I stiffened in response. 

“Are you expecting someone?”

“No.  You?” I asked
innocently.  She threw me an annoyed look and strolled over to the front
door.  I heard her gasp in surprise.  To busy myself—and keep my
hands from shaking—I started unpacking the groceries, so I could put them
away. 

I stared at the pile of meat I had
been stacking on the counter.  My mother had purchased 10 double packs of
New York strip steaks.  Maybe she was planning a cookout before we moved
next month?  I stared down at the blood red meat.

Like a distant echo I could hear
Caelyn greeting Ron at the door.  I should have been anxious for her
reaction to his uninvited presence, but for some weird reason I couldn’t take
my eyes off the raw meat.  Almost like I was standing outside myself
watching, I was disgusted to find I was licking my lips, as I poked at the cool
thickness with a finger to make blood seep out into the white Styrofoam
tray. 

Ridiculously, my mouth watered, and
a fierce hunger pang gripped at my stomach, causing it to growl in protest. The
voices in the living room were white noise, almost indiscernible.  I slit
the plastic open with the nail of my index finger.  Holding the tray to my
face I inhaled, taking the bloody scent into my head.  I didn’t
consciously make the small sound of desire that slipped out. 

When Ron and my mother came into
the kitchen I had one of the worst moments of my life.

I saw Ron’s mouth drop open in
shock as he observed the girl he had spent a mostly typical, pleasant day at
the amusement park with, greedily chomping into a raw piece of beef. 
Caelyn, strangely, didn’t look
as
surprised, but I could tell she didn’t
like what she’d found me doing.  My conscious mind was suddenly back in
control as my eyes widened at the looks on their faces. I froze, not knowing
honestly what I was going to say or do next.  The moment felt
unsalvageable.

Caelyn moved first.  She
turned to Ron, effectively blocking his view of me by stepping in between us
and taking the pizza out of his hands.  She was probably as afraid as I
was that he would drop the box onto the linoleum.  I took full advantage
of her strategic move and moved myself and the mangled piece of meat over to
the sink.  I dropped it there and turned on the water to wash my face and
hands.  Some instinct inside me forced me to lick the blood from my
fingers before thrusting them under the stream coming from the tap.  Part
of me noticed that Caelyn caught that from where she was standing at the
countertop, placing the pizza box there.  She didn’t seem to be nearly as
disgusted with me as I was myself. 

I was incredulous that there was a
part of me fighting not to grab the steak up again and chew at the rubbery meat
until that delicious flavor was once again running over my tongue, flowing down
my throat…

Caelyn cleared
her
throat
and casually wiped at her chin.  I realized the signal she was giving and
splashed water over the lower half of my face.  I grabbed a paper towel to
dry myself.  I was ghastly afraid to turn around and face Ron.

Caelyn seemed determined to make a
return to normalcy.

“Maura,” her voice belied nothing
unusual.  She picked a smaller package up from the top of the pizza
box.  “Ron brought over a movie.  Wasn’t that nice of him?”

I looked at her; my eyes felt all
buggy.  I couldn’t speak, so I nodded my head.  It felt like it was
happening in slow motion, like the air around me had congealed into something
viscous.  The inside of my head was trying to preserve my sanity by
offering up suggestions like, *maybe he didn’t notice the steak was raw.*

“Since your friend is here, don’t
you think you should go upstairs and comb your hair?”  She’d moved closer
to me and smoothed a comforting hand over the back of my head.  I nodded
numbly again and walked very quickly to the stairs, not daring to meet his eyes
when I walked past him. 

I heard Caelyn say the word
“anemic” before I slammed the bathroom door shut behind me.

It took me quite a little while to
compose myself before I could even will myself to climb to my feet.  As
soon as I was safely hidden in the bathroom, I’d slid to the floor and curled
up tightly, hugging my knees.  Absolute horror overtook me. 

Why? Why had I just done
that?!  The scariest part was that I’d known he was in my house, but I
still couldn’t help myself from gnawing at the bloody steak.  And why did
I even feel a compulsion to put something so gross in my mouth—only it hadn’t
been gross.  It was
good
.  Really good.  My mouth watered
as I remembered the taste, even as I sat here castigating myself for what had
just happened.

I wanted to cry, but was too
mortified to form any tears.  What could possibly fix this?

There was a soft knock at the door.

“I’ll be down later, Mom,” my voice
trembled.

“Can I come in?”  It was
him
. 
I didn’t say anything.  “Please, Maura?  Please?”

I still couldn’t say anything.

The door eased open.  My eyes
grew large, afraid of what his expression might say to me.

He was smiling…a real smile, like I
hadn’t just consumed raw meat and licked blood off my hands, right before his
eyes, in my kitchen.  My expression must have been something to behold,
because he rushed over to me and knelt on the floor beside me.

“Are you okay?”  When I
wouldn’t meet his gaze he lifted my chin with his hand.  “Speak,
please?  Say something…anything.”

How could he treat me this way, as
if nothing weird to the extreme had just happened.  Maybe there was far
more wrong with me than my mother was willing to admit.  I could feel my
eyes getting glassy, but I couldn’t even blink.

“Come on,” he shifted around to the
front of me and clasped both my hands.  He pulled me to my feet. 
“Your pizza is going to get cold.”  Avoidance.  I liked it.

“Okay.”  He heaved a sigh that
I hoped was relief, when I spoke.

More avoidance, “I like those
pajamas, way cuter than the rabbit ones.”  These were pink with
multicolored hearts all over the top and bottoms.  I was suddenly
self-conscious that he might have thought I was trying to say something with
the pattern I’d chosen…but remembered half a second later that I had
way
more to be worried about than my choice of wardrobe for the evening. 

I let him lead me, one arm curled
around my waist and the other holding my hand in his, as I stumbled along,
blindly, beside him.  I wondered how he could touch me, after witnessing
my repulsive behavior.

He leaned in to whisper, before we
started down the stairs, “Oh and by the way, your mom told me about your
‘stomach flu’ this morning.  Nice cover.”  I looked at him and he
winked at me.  I was stunned he could be so casual.

Maybe I’d come home and fallen
asleep after the park.  Maybe I was having a nightmare and this whole
catastrophic night had never happened.  That must be it.  No one
could possibly be so calm after…I cringed at the memory.

“It’s okay,” he whispered.  We
were taking the stairs, one at a time now.  Was he serious?  How
could anything ever be okay
again?        

Caelyn was kneeling in front of the
dvd player, putting in a disc.  “Hey Maura, I brought you a plate.” 
I could see avoidance had become the agenda for the evening.  That suited
me just fine.

I gave it a shot, “Um, what movie
did you bring?”  I was surprised by the smoothness of my voice.

“
Serendipity
.  Seen
it?”

“Nope.”

“I knew it would be something you
like.  It’s very cute.”  He made sure Caelyn was busy with the player
and touched the tip of my nose. “Just like you,” he soundlessly mouthed the
words.

I smiled but it felt weak.  I
was busy trying to push the bad memory away every time it tried to intrude on
me.  “What’s it about?”  I managed to ask.

“Destiny.” 

I didn’t miss the sour look Caelyn
shot him when he said that.

Quickly, I pulled him over to the
couch, hoping to avoid anything that might focus on the earlier events of the
night or topics that would upset my mother.  I was already hoping the
movie wouldn’t be too romantic.  That would put her in a funk for a good
week.

The movie turned out to be crazy
romantic.  After she’d finished her two slices of pizza, Caelyn had bowed
out of the rest of the movie, claiming to have brought too much work
home.  She left us, giving me a brief look of warning, the corners of her
perfectly shaped mouth turning down as she walked toward her office off the
living room.  She hadn’t needed to warn me, I knew she would check on
us—often. 

I watched the movie,
entranced.  The basic message was that if two people were meant to be
together, fate would ensure they wound up together, no matter the
obstacles.  Ron held me lightly, in lots of little ways that were easily
untangled when we heard the squeak of Caelyn’s chair, alerting us she was about
to intrude on our semi-privacy.

Of course I cried at the end, when
the couple found each other, despite situations that seemed impossible to
overcome.  I tried to hide it, embarrassed, but Ron saw right through my
lame excuse that I had something in my eye and told me that he found my crying
“endearing.”  I stuck my tongue out at him, and he wiped away a tear I’d
missed.

We were silent for a moment. 
Before Caelyn could come back into the room I had to ask, “Ron,” I dug my nails
into my palms, painfully, as I spoke, “are we going to even talk about…”

“Nope,” he cut me off, then asked
me, “are we sneaking off again tomorrow?”

“I think I feel the stomach flu
coming on again.”

He grinned at me conspiratorially.

I thought he might have kissed me
tonight, when Mom left us to be alone for a minute on the front step. 
Well, he did…sort of.  He leaned in toward me…I closed my eyes…he planted
his lips…on the top of my head.

“Sleep tight, okay?  Have
sweet dreams.

My head was all foggy from the
movie and his touching me all evening.  “Only if they’re of you,” I sighed
at him.

I clamped my eyes shut, feeling the
heat crawl up my face as I thought, *Why did I say that out loud.*

He seemed to enjoy it
immensely.  I got one last look at his one-of-a-kind smile before he vanished
into the moonless night.

I was still trying to shove away
the disturbing images of what had happened in the kitchen earlier.  I’d
decided, though, if he wanted to ignore it, I certainly wasn’t going to argue
with him.  But…I had to wonder what he and Caelyn had said to one another
before he’d come upstairs.  She’d been smart to send him up.  I would
have never come down to face him by myself.

Luckily, I
could
discuss
what had happened with Mom.  And I needed to, wanted some kind of answer
for my wildly irrational behavior.

But this just wasn’t my night.

“Sorry, Mink,” she had an armload
of papers and was already making her way up the stairs, “it’ll have to be
tomorrow.  I still have all this to finish, and I have a very early
meeting in the morning with an important client.”

“But, Mom,” I knew I sounded whiny,
and also knew how much Caelyn hated that.

“I said tomorrow, Maura
Maxine.”  Her tone—and use of my middle name—closed the subject for the
night.

Dejected, I slunk to my room, my
head swimming with mysteries I couldn’t even begin to figure out by myself.

I walked into my private space…and
knew immediately Ron had been in here.  There were several things that
told me this.

First of all, my bed was turned
down.  Caelyn had stopped doing that when I was five.  Not only that,
but tucked under the blanket in my place was a stuffed bunny.  I could
only see its ears and eyes, as my comforter was pulled up to his nose.

Secondly, there was music
playing.  I hadn’t even touched my computer today, so I knew I hadn’t left
the music on myself.  There was also a song playing I didn’t recognize, so
I knew it wasn’t on one of my playlists. 

I walked over, smiling to myself
despite everything, and interrupted the screen saver with my mouse. 
There, in the media player was a playlist named, “Maura’s peaceful sleep mix by
Ron.”  Even though he wasn’t there to see it, my cheeks flushed with the
emotion his gesture had aroused.  I perused his choices, most of them
lullabies by different artists, all of them quiet, serene tunes.  There
was a band called Muse I didn’t recognize.  The name of their song was
“Endlessly.”  I double-clicked on that one, sitting down to Google the
lyrics as I listened.