Rogue Rider (Lords of Deliverance) (29 page)

Jillian squeezed her eyes closed. With the world shut out beyond her eyelids, she could picture Reseph’s smile, the hard set of his jaw when they made love, and she could hear him telling her how strong she was. He’d brought her back into the world she’d been hiding from and had given her a precious gift. She would give him the same. Somehow she’d survive this, and she’d help him.

She opened her eyes but kept them glued to Limos. “I’m okay. Let’s go.”

The throng made a path for Limos, and Jillian followed until one of the creatures, who appeared human-ish except for her gray skin and hair, black horns, and clawed feet, blocked their path.

“Why are you taking this…
human
… when we have to wait out here?”

Jillian didn’t even have time to blink before Limos had the demon by the throat, lifting the thing off the ground. “You do
not
question a Horseman of the Apocalypse. Speak like that again, and you’ll be lucky if I only take your tongue.”

The demon in Limos’s grip nodded—as much as she could—and every demon around them backed up,
widening the circle. Jillian wondered how close Limos had been to doing the same to Jillian back at her house, because she’d been nothing
but
questions.

Limos released the demon, who fell to the ground and stayed there, gasping for air.

“Anyone else want to piss me off?” When no one came forward, Limos smiled. “Good. Come on, Jilly.”

Yeah, Jillian would let that one pass. Good God, she’d threatened a Horseman of the Apocalypse with a frying pan. Reseph could have squashed her with his thumb.

Instead, he’d done amazing, wonderful things with that thumb. The thought that she’d
made love
to one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse made her dizzy.

“Why are all these, um, women, here? Do they think they can help Reseph?”

“They heard he’s back, but they don’t know his condition. They just want to get laid.”

Abruptly, Jillian felt sick. “These are his… girlfriends?”

Limos snorted. “Hardly. They were just his fuck and party buddies.” She snapped her mouth shut with a wince. “Ah, sorry. Look, you should know… he’s a bit of a, well, he
was
a playboy. He’s never attached himself to one female, but I think it’s different with you. That’s why you’re here.”

“You
think
it’s different,” she murmured, her heart aching as she looked back at all the females gathered around.

There had to be a hundred, and they were all, even the freakiest of them, attractive in some way. Some were downright gorgeous, to the point that it hurt to look at them.

Sympathy dripped from Limos’s voice. “Keep in mind,” she said gently, “that Reseph is five thousand years old, and
demons are long-lived, if not immortal. That’s a lot of time to build up a body count.”

Jillian struggled to keep her hopes up. She supposed that what Limos said was true, but it didn’t help a lot. Applying logic to a hurtful situation rarely worked until there was some distance, and Jillian doubted she’d have distance for a long time. Not when the way she felt about Reseph was different and more powerful than anything she’d felt for a man before.

Did these females feel the same way about him? The thought made her ill.

“Let’s go,” she muttered.

They entered the mansion, which opened up into a huge room where Thanatos and Ares were talking with a brown-haired woman and Arik. Arik nodded in greeting, the woman smiled, and Thanatos and Ares just stared.

“Oh, for God’s sake, boys,” the woman said. “She’s not an enemy. Stop glaring.” She moved forward, and with her came a black dog-like creature the size of a bull. “I’m Cara, Ares’s wife. Can I get you anything? Something to drink, maybe?”

I could use a bottle of vodka and a Xanax.
The dog-thing bared its sharklike teeth.
Make that a dozen Xanax.
“Thank you. I’m fine.” Jillian wasn’t sure what she had expected, but a relatively normal, domestic family wasn’t it.

Thanatos gestured at her. “Come on. Reseph’s this way.”

Jillian glanced at Limos, who gave her a reassuring nod. “Thanatos doesn’t bite.” She shot Thanatos a glare. “Don’t bite.”

“Ha. Ha.” He started down the hall, leaving Jillian no choice but to follow. When they reached a door, he stopped. “Did Limos explain the situation to you?”

“You mean that his Seal broke and he turned evil and nearly brought about the end of world? Yeah, I got the CliffsNotes.”

Thanatos arched a tawny brow. “In that case, thank you for doing this, human. I doubt many would. But I was talking about his condition.”

“She said he was hurting himself.”

“Something like that.” His mouth formed a grim line. “I don’t know how he’ll react to you, but don’t expect the man you once knew.” He opened the door. “Scream if you need anything.”

Scream. Great. That didn’t sound reassuring at all. Still, she
knew
Reseph. She wouldn’t let these people frighten her. She was strong. She wouldn’t fall apart.

She stepped inside the bedroom.

And promptly fell apart.

“Oh, Reseph,” Jillian whispered. “What have they done to you?” Thanatos and Limos had warned her, but this went beyond anything she could have imagined.

Reseph sat with his back against the wall, his body a mass of wounds in various stages of healing. His arms were wrapped around his bent knees, his head hung loosely on his shoulders, his hair obscured his face. Wearing nothing but sweatshorts, he rocked back and forth, soft moans breaking from his chest.

From his ankles, seeming to come directly from his skin, were thick, ivory chains that attached to the wall like a root system. They were long, giving him the freedom to move around the room and bathroom, but not long enough to go through the door.

“Reseph?” All of her apprehension fled, and she rushed to him, fell to her knees at his side. “Hey, it’s me. It’s Jillian.”

When he didn’t respond, just kept rocking, she very slowly reached out to brush his hair back. She fought a gasp at the sight of his blackened eyes and deeply gouged cheeks. Dear God, it looked like he’d clawed at himself.

“Reseph.” This time she spoke louder, with more force, and he jerked.

In a series of choppy motions, Reseph lifted his head and fixed his glassy gaze on hers. For a few agonizing heartbeats, Jillian wasn’t sure he recognized her.

“Jillian?” His voice was gravelly and raw. “You look like my Jillian.”

My Jillian
. The words brought fresh emotion to the surface, and she had to swallow before she could speak. “It’s me. I’m here.”

His hand shook as he reached for her, but an inch from her face, he stopped.

“Go ahead,” she whispered. “I’m real.”

His fingertip brushed her cheek, and then his palm, and then, so suddenly she gasped, he threw his arms around her and hauled her against him.

“I can’t believe it,” he rasped into her ear. “Can’t. Oh, fuck. How long? Jillian, how long has it been?”

“A few days.”

“No, can’t be. Months, it’s been months.”

How horrible must his torment have been to make him think he’d been stuck in this room for months? “It doesn’t matter. I’m here now.”

He pulled back just enough to kiss her, and yes, it had felt like months. “I’ve missed you. I’ve been… I’ve been…”

“I know.” She traced his lower lip with the pad of
her finger, skimming lightly over a freshly healed cut. “When’s the last time you ate?”

He frowned. “Dinner. That night with you.”

“You haven’t eaten in over a week? Shit. Okay, hold on.” She started to stand, but he gripped her wrist.

“Don’t… don’t leave me.” His plea skinned her alive.

“I won’t be out of your sight.”

He didn’t look convinced, but he nodded. She hurried to the door and shouted for Limos, who came running.

“You okay?”

“I need food and something to drink. I think I can get him to eat.”

Limos’s raven brows shot up. “Seriously? You got it. One sec.”

Jillian went back to Reseph, who took her hand the moment she was within reach. “I’m sorry you have to see me like this.” He looked down at himself. “I should shower.”

“Let me help you.”

For once, he didn’t make a joke of it with something suggestive, which only emphasized how serious this situation was.

“You don’t have to help.” Sluggishly, he pushed to his feet. “But… could you stay in the bathroom with me?”

“Of course. But I’m not going anywhere, okay?”

He nodded and moved to the bathroom, wobbly at first, but his strength returned with every step. His body had been terribly abused, but its grace and power had in no way been diminished. She sat on the toilet while he showered and brushed his teeth, the infernal chains clanking with every movement.

There was a light tap on the door. “That’s the food.
I’ll get it.” When she opened the door, Ares stood there with a tray. There were three sandwiches piled high with meat and cheese, two plates of cake, and two bottles of water.

“See if you can get him to drink all of the water. There’s a sedative in it. It won’t make him go to sleep, but it should help him relax.”

“Thanks.”

“Also, fair warning. The sedative might have a mild aphrodisiac effect.”

“Aphrodisiac?”

“Thanks to our mother’s side of the family, when we have side-effects, they’re usually of a sexual nature.”

Huh. Well, if someone had to have a side-effect from a medication, she supposed arousal would be better than dry mouth, nausea, stroke, or heart attack.

She thanked Ares again, but just as it occurred to her to ask why their mother’s side would influence medical side-effects, he walked away. Well, she could ask later.

When she turned around, Reseph was sitting in the corner, naked, his back to the wall.

“I just realized you must have cut my hair when you found me.” His gaze was downcast, his face partially concealed by said hair.

“It was too tangled to brush,” she explained, hoping he wasn’t upset that she’d taken scissors to his long mane before he’d thawed from his snowbank ordeal. “I’m sorry.”

He looked up, smiling a little. “I like it. Kind of cuts away some of… what I was.”

Whew.
“We don’t need to sit on the floor,” she said. “There’s a perfectly good bed.”

He eyed it sadly. “I don’t belong there.” His gaze fell to the floor again. “I belong in hell, Jillian.”

“Don’t say that.” She crossed the room and sank to her knees next to him. “From what I understand, you aren’t responsible for the things that happened.”

“Pestilence is part of me,” he rasped. “Even now, I can feel his ugliness. I felt it at your farm, but I didn’t know what it was.” He shuddered, and she took his hand as if that one lame gesture could fix everything. “It’s… it’s like an abscess on my soul.”

Her throat squeezed closed, clogged with emotion. “I’m so sorry. I can’t even imagine how that must feel.” She pulled the tray closer. “Please eat. It might not help your soul, but it’ll help your stomach.”

He looked at the food as if it were poison. “I can’t.”

“If your stomach’s upset, try some water.”

“Can’t, Jillian.”

“You don’t think you don’t deserve it, do you?” Her heart broke wide open. “Don’t punish yourself like this. Please, Reseph. Do it for me.” When he made no move for the tray, she unscrewed the cap from one of the bottles and put it to his lips. “Please. I hate seeing you like this.”

Closing his eyes, he whispered, “For you, love. For you.”

Jillian had changed Reseph’s life. First, she’d given him sanctuary and showed him that it wasn’t necessary to fill every moment with people and parties. For the first time in five thousand years, he’d been content. Happy. And now she was giving him a distraction from the prison inside his head. He didn’t deserve her. He didn’t deserve any of
this—water, food, a room in Ares’s house, kindness—not after all the things he’d done.

Hell, if his siblings and their mates wanted to string him up and torture the everliving fuck out of him for years on end, he’d deserve it. He certainly wouldn’t fight it. Instead, they were trying to help him. He couldn’t believe they’d even brought Jillian.