Romance: Luther's Property (20 page)

The next morning, I woke up feeling nauseous.
 
I assumed that it was just from lack of sleep
and emotional turmoil. I sat on the edge of the bed and glanced out the
window.
 
The sky had an ominous sort of
glow to it, and I could sense that a hard snow was about to fall.
 
The winters in Bozeman could get pretty rough
and I didn’t even want to think about how I’d brave through this one without
Joey.

I trudged into the bathroom and splashed some water on my
face, then sat back down on the edge of the bed.
 
Rebecca had told me that she’d come by in the
morning for breakfast, and sure enough I heard her rapping on the door at
exactly eight o’clock.
 
I fumbled around
for a pair of sweatpants and threw my hair into a pony-tail.
 
Then I squeezed into a pair of slippers and
walked down the hall.
 

“I brought you your favorite.
 
The red-cherry cheese Danish from McCormick’s.”
 
Rebecca called up from the landing.
 
I smiled.
 
She was always right on time.
 
The
sun attempted to squeeze out from behind the clouds but was soon pushed back
under the heavy cloud cover.
 
I wondered
how long it would be for the first snowflake to fall.

“Good morning.
 
Sorry
it took me forever to get down here.
 
I’ve been feeling kind of sick to my stomach.”
 
I frowned at Rebecca and she cocked her head
to the side.

“See what happens when you don’t eat right?
 
Your body gets all confused and starts acting
up.”
 
She gave me one of her motherly
looks and then waltzed into the kitchen with the pastries and some
coffees.
 
I watched her get some napkins
out and then sit down.

“I’m going to speak to Peter Bailey today.”
 
I nodded my head and then sat down.
 
“He always told me that he could help out with
the outdoor work, and I think I’m going to need it.
 
The fence is falling apart and the horse
trough needs to be fixed.
 
It’s a miracle
that Lizzie is still surviving.”
 
Lizzie
was the horse that Joey had bought me for twenty-ninth birthday.
 
One of the neighbors had volunteered to take
care of her for me when Joey passed away, and I as much as it broke my heart to
think about selling her, I sometimes wondered if that was the best choice.

“Well I’m glad to hear that you’ll be getting out of the
house for a little.”
 
Rebecca sat back
and smiled.
 
Then she took a sip of her
coffee and looked out the window.
 
“Maybe
Peter can help you figure out how fix that gate out front, too.”
 
She looked at me with a compassionate eye,
then handed me my coffee.
 
“You look kind
of pale.
 
You sure it’s just your stomach
bothering you?”
 
Rebecca had a puzzled
look on her face.

“I’m not sure.
 
I
think I might go lay down for a little.”
 
I got up without even sipping my coffee.
 
Then I wandered down the hall and stood with my hand on top of my
stomach. That’s when it hit me.
 
I
covered my mouth with my hand and realized that I wasn’t sick at all.
 
I was pregnant.
 
I stood motionless for what felt like an
eternity.
 

“Are you okay, Alyssa?”
 
Rebecca walked out to find me.
 
She had a piece of her pastry in one hand and a cup of coffee in the
other.
 
I turned slowly to face her and
then bit my lower lip.

“Rebecca?”
 
I stared
straight ahead and then looked her in the eyes.
 
“I’m pregnant.”
 
The words rolled
off my tongue with a mellifluous echo that lingered in the air.
 
Rebecca just stared at me.

“Are you joking?”
 
She
chuckled and then a perplexed expression crept over her face.
 
“I mean, Alyssa, are you serious?”
 
She covered her mouth with her hand and then
walked slowly toward me.
 
I looked at her
at then looked away.

“I was supposed to get my period like three weeks ago.
 
And today I woke up feeling sick.
 
This is crazy.”
 
I looked at Rebecca and then a surprising
jolt of excitement coursed through my veins.
 
A baby?
 
It was almost too much to
process.

“Okay, girl.
 
I’m
going to the pharmacy and picking up a pregnancy test.
 
Finish this Danish and wait for me to get
back.”
 
Rebecca shoved the pastry into my
hand and before I could even protest, she was out the door.
 
About a half hour later she returned, waving
a small, rectangular box in my face and ushering me into the downstairs
bathroom.
 
“Let’s go.
 
Pee on the stick.”
 
She handed me the box, smiled and walked out.

“I don’t even need to do this.”
 
I shook my head, knowing with a mother’s
intuition that I was definitely pregnant.
 
I took the stick out of the box, sat down on the toilet, and covered my
head with my hands.
 
I was still nauseas,
and I wasn’t even ready to comprehend the magnitude of what was about to become
my new reality.
 
I leaned forward and a
tiny stream of pee trickled onto the stick.
 
I set it on the windowsill, then got up and left the bathroom.

“Well?”
 
Rebecca stood
outside the door, her hands on her hips.
 

“I didn’t look at it.
 
I don’t need to look at it.”
 
I
swallowed hard and then stood motionless.
 
“But I’ll double-check.”
 
I spun
around and peered at the windowsill, then inched closer and picked up the
stick.
 
It was as pink as a pig.
 
I picked it up, held it out for Rebecca to
see, then bit my lower lip.

“Congratulations!”
 
Rebecca threw her arms around me and kissed me on the cheek.
 
I smiled, and for the first time in two
months, I felt like life was something worth living for.
 
She backed up, her hands on my shoulders.
 
“This is incredible.
 
I’m so happy for you!
 
I have to tell Manfred.
 
He’ll be so excited.”
 
Rebecca smiled and then nodded her head.
 
“This is good, Alyssa.
 
This is exactly what was needed.”
 
I smiled back, knowing in my heart that she
was right.

After she left to pick up Cherry from school, I sat alone on
the couch and tried to get my head straight.
 
I was pregnant, and I was alone.
 
What was I going to do now?
 
I had
heard all kinds of stories about women who were single that went on to raise
successful children, all on their own.
 
I
wanted to believe that I’d be able to handle the pressures that would come with
being a single parent, but I didn’t know if I would really have what it took.

What if I couldn’t do it on my own?
 
What if I failed miserably and my child went
on to become some sort of dysfunctional member of society?
 
I could feel my mind wandering with all sorts
of imagined, negative outcomes.
 
Then I
heard a tiny voice inside, coming from the last corner of hopefulness in my
heart, tell me that I could do it.
 
I
could have this baby and still make it.
 
There was hope, if I only allowed myself to believe.

I went to bed that night with a sense of wonder that was
tinged with fear.
 
It was only normal to
be afraid, I told myself.
 
The world
could be a big, scary place and trying to navigate it alone could be even
scarier.
 
I didn’t even want to think
about the financial aspects of the situation, but it was impossible not to
worry.
 
Joe had worked all of his life as
a mason, but it hadn’t left us with much in the bank.

I tossed and turned through the night and finally fell
asleep when the moon rose over the valley.
 
When I woke up the next morning, a blanket of snow covered Bozeman and
the sun shone bright over the mountain range in the distance.
 
I reached for a sweater and a pair of jeans,
then yanked on my boots and headed downstairs.
 
It pained me that Joe wasn’t here to see how beautiful it looked
outside, but I knew that his spirit could sense that it was another beautiful
morning in Montana.

“Hey, Rebecca.
 
It’s
Alyssa.
 
I’m heading out to pick up a few
bales of hay for Lizzie, and I’m thinking about going to get some tea
afterward.
 
Want to meet me at
Gina’s?”
 
I wanted to get out of the
house.
 
The heavy weight of sadness that
had ensnared me for the last two months felt like it was fighting its way off
my body.
 
I concentrated my thoughts on
the new life that was growing inside me and tried to think of ways that I could
forge ahead with grace and ease.

I walked downstairs and fished around for the keys to Joey’s
old F-150, then I got my purse and headed out the door.
 
I stood for a second and looked at the truck,
remembering the first day that he drove it home.
 
He’d been so proud and excited.
 
Choking back a tear, I opened up the driver’s
side door and climbed up into the cab.

The snow covered road crunched under the weight of the tires
as I drove slowly around the curves that lead into downtown Bozeman.
 
I got to the feed store just as the sun
retreated behind the clouds, and I looked up with curiosity, wondering if it
would snow again, already.
 
Logan Fisher,
a long-time employee and old friend of Joe’s, knew exactly what I wanted
without me even asking.
 
“I got three
fresh bales waiting for you out back.
 
Drive her around and you’re all set.”
 
He gave me a friendly wink and then went back behind the register.

If there was one quality that I loved about Montana, it was
the loyalty and the trustworthiness of its residents.
 
Even though we had a heavy college-aged
population, Bozeman was still a homegrown sort of mountain town that made
me feel like I had known its inhabitants forever.
 
I knew that Logan missed Joe terribly, and it
was hard for either one of us to say much when we saw each other.
 

I drove around to the back of the store and one of the
younger employees tossed the bales into the back of the truck.
 
I thanked him and then drove off toward
Gina’s.
 
Along the way I passed Don’s
Fish and Tackle, one of Joe’s favorite stores.
 
I fought back a tear and tried to focus on sitting down with Rebecca to
a comforting cup of tea.

“Over here!”
 
she
waved me down as soon as I opened the door.
 
I kicked off the snow from my boots and then walked toward her, a smile
on my face as soon as we made eye contact.
 
“Sit down.
 
I already ordered you
a chamomile and put some honey in it for you.”
 
I laughed at Rebecca’s forward yet generous nature.
 

“Thanks, Rebecca.
 
You’re the best.
 
Really.”
 
I lifted up the mug she had set before me and
blew the steam off the top.
 
Then I took
a long sip and placed it back on its saucer.
 
The sun had tucked itself behind a thick accumulation of clouds and I
wondered how soon before we were in the midst of another snowfall.
 

“How are you feeling?”
 
She smiled and then took a sip of her coffee.

“I’m okay.
 
But I have
some serious planning to do.
 
I mean, I
don’t have a job, Rebecca.
 
And Joe
didn’t leave much in the savings account that we shared.
 
In fact, most of what he made right before
the accident was sent over to his brother when he lost his house in that
fire.
 
Bless Joes’ heart, he was a good
man and he was awfully generous, but it didn’t put us in much of a position to
handle a situation like this.”
 
I shook
my head and looked at Rebecca for consolation.

“Let’s put our heads together and think about what you can
do here.”
 
She looked at me and smiled,
then took another sip of her tea.
 
“You
know I told Manfred as soon as I got in.
 
He’s completely excited for you.”
 
Rebecca reached across the table and grabbed my arm with her hand.
 
“This is really going to be great,
Alyssa.
 
Don’t worry so much.”
 
She winked and I sighed.
 
Easier said than done, I thought.

I got up to use the bathroom after I had finished my tea and
then stopped to look at the bulletin board before making my way back to the
table.
 
A tiny brown square of card-stock
tacked to the top of the board caught my eye.
 
Need money fast?
 
Avalanche Saloon is hiring for all
positions.
 
Must be efficient, personable
and responsible.
 
Stop by in person and
ask for Tim Deshane if interested.
 
I
tilted my head in brief contemplation, then walked back to the table.

“Can you see me working as a waitress?”
 
I sat down and eyed Rebecca with a serious
tone.
 
She sipped her coffee and then
coked her head in thought.

“Waitress?”
 
She asked
out loud, as if it would lead her to an answer.
 
“I think that if you have a baby to take care of, I can picture you
doing anything that pays the bills.”
 
She
knew that I was a hard worker and that I already had quite a few connections in
town.
 
I wasn’t so sure that she thought
I’d be a great fit over at Avalanche, but like she said- if it paid the bills,
then it suited the purpose.

“I’m going to walkover there after we finish here.”
 
I nodded my head in affirmation, then looked
outside as the snow started to fall.
 
“I
knew it.”
 
I craned my neck and watched
as the sky grew even grayer.
 
“I bet you
we get another foot tonight.”
 
I looked
outside and watched as a group of college-aged kids rough-housed on the side of
the road.
 

“I hope you get the job if you really want it.”
 
Rebecca nodded her head and then pulled a few
dollars out of her purse.
 
“The tea’s on
me today.”
 
She smiled and then we both
got up and reached for our coats.
 
“Hey,
by the way- are you going to get everything conformed with the doctor soon?”
 
She always had good questions.

“Yep.
 
I already made
an appointment with Doctor Crawford.
 
I
think I’m about 3 months along.”
 
I
nodded my head and tried to do the math in my head.
 
Rebecca nodded with interest.
 
“I bet you it’s a girl, too.”
 
I wasn’t sure where that spontaneous
statement came from, but I chuckled once it came out.
 
Rebecca smiled.

“Give me a call and let me know how it goes.”
 
Rebecca gave me a squeeze on the shoulder and
then we both turned and headed for the door.
 
When we got outside, it was snowing heavily.
 
We parted ways and I walked with a determined
step until I reached the front of Avalanche.
 
It stood out from all the other restaurants on the street because of its
elaborate, hand-painted mural at the entrance.
 

Stopping at Avalanche for a beer after work had been one of
Joe’s simple pleasures.
 
I could still remember
the day he told me about the new art work that they had done.
 
“You ought to see it, Liss.
 
This guy painted an entire mountain landscape
scene, and there’s big-horn sheep, too.
 
It’s pretty impressive.”
 
Joe had
always had an interest in art, and I thought of him as soon as I reached the
front steps.
 
I sighed to myself and then
slowly pulled back the long, wooden handle and opened the door.
 

The bar was packed, even at this time of day.
 
A few younger men who looked like they had
just finished snowboarding sat at one end of the bar drinking beer, and another
group of older men sat on the other end sipping brandy.
 
I craned my neck to see if I could spot Tim
Deshane, and just as I was about to walk toward the kitchen, I saw another
group of older men step inside the bar.

Avalanche always attracted a mixed crowd- everyone from
college students to young ranchers, laborers and small business owners liked to
stop here to have a drink and catch up with friends.
 
The décor was a mixture of modern and classic
décor, with lots of white pine and oak furnishing.
 
I thought of how much Joe would have enjoyed
sitting down for a drink on a snowy day like this, and my eyes welled with
tears.
 
Just as I was about to excuse
myself and go outside to cry, Tim appeared from the kitchen.

“Hello there, Alyssa.
 
How are you?”
 
His ruddy face
greeted me with a concerned and empathetic smile.
 

“I’m hanging in there, Tim.
 
Thanks.”
 
I nodded my head and
then stuffed my hands in my pockets.
 
I
felt awkward asking him for a job.
 
Maybe
I had too much pride, having always been a homemaker with a husband to support
me.
 
I didn’t know why I felt so out of
place, but it was difficult to bring myself to speak.

“What brings you to the trusty Avalanche on a wintry day
like today?”
 
He smiled and then walked
behind the bar.
 

I swallowed hard and then forced out a wry smile.
 
“Well, Tim…’
 
My voice trailed off and then I drew in a deep breath.
 
“Well, I was at Gina’s today with a friend,
and I saw your ad on the bulletin board.”
 
I smoothed down my hair and then looked shuffled my feet a few
times.
 

“You’re interested in my waitress position?”
 
Tim handed one of the snowboarders a frosty
mug of beer, then stood back with his hands on his hips.

“Yes.
 
Actually, I’m
very interested.”
 
I smiled and a sense
of relief permeated my body.
 

“Wow.
 
I never took
you for the waitressing type, Alyssa.”
 
Tim cocked his head to the side and then poured another beer for a
customer.
 
I started to feel like I
shouldn’t have come inside.
 
Maybe he
thought I was too old, or too desperate.
 
I looked around the bar and saw a few young, attractive women giggling
and playing with their hair.
 

“Well…”
 
I wasn’t even
sure what I wanted to say.
 
I felt stupid
for even asking him about the position, and decided to tell him to forget I had
even asked.

“Can you start this weekend?”
 
He raised his eyebrows and then stuffed an
empty glass in the sink that he had filled with sudsy water.
 
My heart leapt with surprise.
 
Had he just hired me?

“I’m hired?”
 
I looked
at him with wide eyes and he just smiled.
 
I nodded my head and realized that he had hired me out of sympathy.
 
At the same time, I knew that he trusted my
ability to work hard, and to make sure that I did the best job that I
could.
 

“Tim.”
 
I stepped
closer toward the bar and he waved me away.

“Don’t worry about it, Alyssa.
 
I got you covered.
 
Just make sure you’re here by three, and wear
something…”
 
His voice trailed off and
then he shrugged.
 
“What am I
saying?”
 
He chuckled and then
sighed.
 

“You want me to wear something hip and attractive.
 
I know the deal.”
 
I smiled and then turned around to
leave.
 
The bar had gotten packed and
noisy with patrons.
 
I stopped and then
turned my head.
 
“Hey, Tim,” I
called.
 
“Thanks for helping me out.
 
Joey would really appreciate it.”
 
I choked back a tear while Tim just nodded
his head and sighed.