Rooter (Double H Romance) (36 page)

Camilla pulls me into her arms and murmurs comforting words about how he’ll be just fine and we’ll be back home with one another in no time. She has to be right. If he doesn’t pull through it’ll be the end of me. I don’t want to live in a world in which he doesn’t exist. I refuse to live without him.

A little over two hours later, the doctor appears before us.

Chapter 48
A Long Night

The somber expression on the doctor’s face sends me into a panic. I jump from my seat to face him directly. Mick, Camilla, and Isa join me. Before I can ask about Rooter, the doctor extends his hand to Mick to introduce himself.

“I’m the surgeon who worked on your son. My name is Doctor Gallagher.”

“I’m Mick Russo.” Anxiety looms in his eyes as he shakes the doctor’s hand. “How is my son?”

“He suffered two gunshot wounds, both of which hit his left lung.” The way the doctor speaks is so careful it’s almost robotic. “He suffered major blood loss, a collapsed lung, and went into respiratory shock.”

Camilla chokes back a sob and clasps a hand to her mouth.

“Is my son alive?” Mick barks, apparently as irritated with the explanation as I am.

“He’s in critical condition,” Doctor Gallagher begins, “unable to breathe on his own. But yes, he’s alive. He’s in recovery at this time and will be moved to the ICU where he’ll be sedated and connected to a ventilator.”

“Is he going to be okay?” Camilla cries.

“I assure you we’re doing everything we can.” The doctor stands with his hands in the pockets of his lab coat. “We were able to remove both bullets and have put a tube in place to aid the collapsed lung. It’s our hope he’ll regain the ability to breathe on his own within the next twenty four hours.”

“And if he doesn’t?” I ask.

“I prefer not to speculate. We have every confidence he’ll regain the ability to breathe on his own by that time.” For a moment seems that’s all he will say on the matter, but when he sees the scowl on my face he continues. “If not, we’ll reassess his condition and treatment at that time.”

“When can we see him?” Isa asks. It was going to be my next question.

“He should be in ICU within an hour. However, only one visitor may be in the room at a time.” The doctor looks at Isa and then to Camilla. “Please be warned that the sight of Jace in his current condition may be… overwhelming.”

“We understand,” Camilla says. “Thank you, Doctor Gallagher.”

An hour later on the button a nurse lets us know we can see Rooter. I want to run at full speed into his room, but only one visitor may go. I turn to Camilla and tell her to go ahead. She shakes her head.

“You’re the first one he’d want to see,” she tells me.

“He isn’t awake,” I insist. “He’s your son. You should be the first to see him.”

“You are his love, Sophie. And he is yours. If it was Mick in there, nothing and no one would keep me away.”

“Are you sure?” I ask.

“I’m sure.”

I look to Mick and Isa as well who both nod in agreement. I turn and follow the nurse through the ICU doors wishing Camilla could come with me. I’m not sure I can do this alone. The doctor warned us about how he will appear. My hands become slick and I wring them nervously as we approach his door. I look to the nurse in search of comfort and strength. She gives me an understanding smile before pulling back the curtain and stepping aside. I close my eyes and take a deep breath in an attempt to prepare myself for what I’m about to see.

But there’s nothing that could possibly prepare me.

Rooter—my invincible love—lays in the bed with a myriad of wires and tubes connected to him. I follow the tube in his mouth to the machine that is breathing for him. His chest rises and falls in time with the sound of the machine. Tears fall from my eyes as I make my way to his side. His skin is pale and cool to the touch when I press my lips to his forehead.

“I’m here, babe.” I cry and take his hand into mine. “I love you so much. Can you hear me? I love you and I’m so very sorry.”

My legs fail me and I grab the bed rails to keep from falling. There’s a rolling stool behind me and I pull it up so I can sit at his side. His hand is limp in mine as I entwine my fingers with his. With my free hand I trace the design of the tattoo on his arm. I remember all the times he reached for me with this arm. The way it felt to wake up in the morning being held by this arm. My body shakes as I sob quietly. Several minutes pass until I’m composed enough to speak again.

“The doctor says you should be able to breathe on your own within twenty four hours,” I stroke his forehead with the back of my fingers, “but I can’t wait that long. I need you to wake up and come back to me.”

I tell him about what happened with the cops and that Bear is with Miranda explaining what happened.

“You saved me, Rooter. I’d be dead if not for you,” I choke. It’s a while before I can speak again. “Why didn’t you let him shoot me? Seeing you like this… the fear that you won’t wake up is killing me. I can’t live without you. Please, please come back to me.”

A half hour passes. I don’t want to leave his side, but it’d be selfish of me to stay any longer when his family are all in the waiting room, probably going crazy as they wait their turn to see him.

“They’re only allowing one person in here at a time. I’m going to leave for a little while so your mom, Mick, and Isa can see you.” I kiss the cool skin of his forehead again. “I’ll be back soon, I promise.”

When I step out into the waiting room it’s filled with members of the club. I try to remember if they’ve been here the entire time, but everything from the moment Rooter was shot is fuzzy.

“Sorry I took so long,” I tell Camilla.

“No need to apologize, sweetie.” She squeezes my hand.

Over the course of two hours, the four of us take turns visiting with him. The one visitor at a time rule seems ridiculous. What would it hurt for the four of us to be in there? It’s not like we can disturb him, he’s sedated for God’s sake.

After my third time visiting with him I remember to call Bear to find out how it went with Miranda. I’d call her directly, but am not sure that’s a great idea. When I turn my phone on there’s a multitude of voicemails and texts from Ryan. Before I can check on Miranda, I need to call him.

“Jesus, Sophie, are you okay?” His voice is laden with fear.

I should’ve called him a long time ago, but I haven’t been able to think about anything other than Rooter and whether he’ll survive. He’s probably in his house amid all the destruction wondering what the hell happened.

“I’m so sorry Ryan.” I rub my face with my free hand. “I’ll find a way to pay for the damage.”

“Babe,” his voice is tender and kind, “you have nothing to apologize for. I’ve been so worried. Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine, but Rooter was shot.” I turn and gaze in direction of the ICU doors. Isa is in with him now. “He’s in critical condition.”

“Where are you?”

“I’m at Memorial in the ICU waiting room.”

“I’m on my way.”

As soon as I hang up with Ryan I dial Bear’s number. He picks up on the third ring.

“Are you with her now?” I ask, biting my thumb nail.

“Yeah. Here she is.” He sounds exhausted.

“Hi.” Her voice is thick with emotion.

“How are you?” A stupid question, but I don’t know what else to say.

“I don’t know,” she sniffles. “It’s all so hard to believe.”

“Yeah, it is.” I stare absentmindedly at a cheap painting on the waiting room wall.

“How are you? How is Rooter doing?”

“I’m okay,” I pace, look to the floor. “Rooter is sedated. He’s hooked to a ventilator because he can’t breathe on his own.”

“Oh, God, Sophie,” she sobs. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“I should’ve kicked Mike out a long time ago. He could’ve killed you.”

“This just would’ve happened that much sooner.”

Mick hands me a steaming cup of coffee from the vending machine. I put it to my lips and swallow. It’s so hot it burns all the way down, but I welcome the sensation as it temporarily gives me something to focus on other than the gaping hole in my heart.

“I’m so glad you’re okay. I don’t know what I would’ve done if… I love you Sophie.”

“I love you, too.” The lump in my throat threatens to choke me. “How are things with you and Bear?”

“We’ll be okay. I understand he did it to save both of you and I’m glad he did.”

After saying goodbye, Bear gets back on the phone and asks about Rooter’s condition. I give him the details and promise to call as soon as there’s an update. Before hanging up I ask him to please take care of Miranda.

Poor Miranda; in a year’s time she’s lost her father, her mother, and now her brother. I know what it feels like to have no family, but it’s different when you lose family members whom you love. Mike may have turned bad, but he wasn’t always so. There was a time, not all that long ago, when they were close. I’m sure as she mourns her loss she’s thinking about the Mike of old and all the good times they shared.

At present, the only memory I have of Mike is the sound of his threats as he tore through Ryan’s house intending to kill me.

Only spouses and parents may spend the night in an ICU patient’s room so Camilla stays with Rooter. Before going in she urges me to try to sleep and promises to come get me if there’s any change in his condition.

Sometime after four in the morning I doze off. When I open my eyes it’s only six thirty. Isa and Mick are both asleep in chairs to the right of mine. Ryan sleeps in the chair to my left. I keep my eyes on the clock for two hours until Mick stirs.

“Did you sleep?” He asks and rubs his face.

“For a couple hours.”

Ryan sits up in the seat next to me and Isa wakes up as well.

“It’s probably going to be a long day.” Mick’s voice is full of concern.

I have no doubt it will be. But, I’m not the one to worry about. Sometime today we will find out if Rooter can breathe on his own. The ICU doors open and Camilla appears. Her eyes go straight to me.

“Did you sleep at all?” She asks, concerned.

Do I look that bad? “A little.”

“Sophie, you need to rest. If Rooter wakes up and sees you like this…”

I guess I do look that bad. “I can’t sleep until he wakes up.”

“He’s going to wake up today, sweetie. Why don’t you go on back and talk to him for a while.” It isn’t a question.

When I enter his room, he looks exactly the same as he did the last time I was in here, though his color is a little better. His skin, though, is still cool to the touch. I press my lips to his forehead and then to his eyelids.

“Good morning, babe. I missed you.”
I still miss you. Come back to me.
I wipe a tear from my cheek.

Doctor Gallagher walks in and stands at Rooter’s side, opposite of me. “He’s healing rapidly. The pneumothorax is improved and he won’t be needing the tube anymore. We’ll remove it shortly.”

I breathe a sigh of relief at the good news. But now what about his breathing?

The doctor answers my unspoken question. “We will also try to take him off the ventilator to see if he’s able to breathe on his own.”

A shot of relief and fear run through me at once. I want to know if he can, but what if he can’t? What then? But I don’t dare ask. No sense in considering the worst. I need to be positive right now.

“The nurses will be in shortly,” he says. “You’ll need to leave the room at that time.”

“Thank you doctor.”

“Did you hear that?” I kiss Rooter’s temple. “The doctor says you’re healing rapidly. You need to breathe on your own, okay? You have to come back to me.”

I stroke his soft hair and notice it’s longer than usual. A moment later a team of nurses appear before me. The older, round, brunette speaks.

“We’re going to take him off sedation. If he’s able to breathe on his own, we will remove the ventilator. We’ll need you to leave the room while we work on him. Someone will come out with an update as soon as we’re finished.”

I lean in and whisper in his ear. “Breathe for me, babe. Please breathe for me. I’ll be waiting.”

Chapter 49
Jace

Over an hour later, we’re still waiting for someone to tell us what’s going on. I’ve chewed my thumb nail so much it’s bleeding and I’m surprised I haven’t worn a hole in the floor from pacing.

“What are they doing in there?” I snap.

“I’m losing my mind,” Camilla groans.

“It can’t be too much longer,” Mick tries to reassure us.

I throw my head back and huff, impatient. I can’t wait much longer. What’s going on? How is he? Have they taken him off of sedation? Can he breathe on his own? Why the fuck is it taking so long?

I wish Ryan was still here. His nearness has a calming effect on me which I could use right now. But he has to handle some things at his house. When I turn around there’s a nurse scurrying toward me with a tense expression. A pain rips through my chest.

“I need Sophie,” she says, frantic.

“That’s me.” I close the distance between us.

Camilla, Mick, and Isa jump from their seats.

“Come with me,” she orders and tugs my hand.

“Is he okay?” I ask with a shaking voice.

“He’s demanding to see you.”

I suck in a breath of relief as she leads me at a hurried pace into the ICU. The moment I’m through the doors I hear him hollering.

“Sophie! Where’s Sophie?”

“He woke up in a panicked state, yelling your name.”

When we round the corner into his room a team of nurses, male and female, try to hold Rooter down in the bed. He’s trying to rip at his wires and IV.

“I’m here!” I call out and run to him, unable to stop tears from pouring from my eyes.

“Sophie?” He peers around one of the bodies.

A tall male steps out of the way giving me access to him.

“I’m here, it’s okay, calm down.”

Rooter reaches out and pulls me to him. “Babe, you’re okay.”

His warm hands give me an immediate sense of calm. I stroke the side of his face as I whisper, “You saved me.”

“Will you relax now?” The male nurse asks, out of breath.

Rooter nods without taking his eyes off of mine. The team of nurses leave us alone in the room.

“I’ve never been so scared in my life,” he says and tugs me onto the side of the bed. His voice is raspier than usual.

“You?” I shake my head. “You have no idea what fear is. You were shot and have been sedated on a ventilator since last night.”

“He could’ve shot you.” He grimaces. His eyes are damp with unshed tears.

“It should’ve been me.”

“No. Never say that.” He wipes my tears away with his hand.

“You could’ve died,” I sniffle.

“Better me than you.”

I shake my head vehemently. “I’d rather be dead than live in a world where you don’t exist,” I choke. “I love you.”

He smiles. “I love you, too.”

I want to wrap my arms around him and hold him tight, but don’t want to hurt him. Instead, I lay my forehead against his and whisper, “Please don’t leave me again.”

“I’ll never leave you baby.” He clutches the side of my face and presses his lips to mine. “I swear to fucking God, I will murder anything and anyone who tries to come between us.”

Three days later Rooter is released from the hospital. I’ve agreed to stay with him while he recuperates.

“I could get used to this,” Rooter says with a smirk as I set his breakfast, a bowl of oatmeal and fresh fruit salad, in front of him.

“Forget it. I’m not June Cleaver.” I take a seat across from him at the dining room table.

“That’s a shame.” He chews a bite of pineapple. “You make a good rendition.”

“Ha ha.” I fake a laugh.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you?” He asks, turning serious.

Mike’s funeral is today. I’m attending, but the weird thing is, Miranda isn’t the only reason I’m going. Mike was a big part of my life. If not for the drugs and alcohol, things may not have gone the way they did. He might be still the Mike I grew up with. That’s the Mike I will memorialize. That is the Mike I’m mourning.

I swallow my bite. “You should stay here. The doctor said to take it easy for a week.”

“It’s not strenuous to sit in a chair,” he gripes. He hasn’t been a very diligent patient.

“No, but it’ll be stressful.” I stir bits of strawberries into my oatmeal. “Miranda isn’t doing well, so I’ll be comforting her the entire time. I can’t take care of both of you at the same time.”

“I’m fine, Sophie.” His spoon clangs the side of his bowl.

“You’re not fine,” I snipe. “You have two holes in your body.”

He takes my hand and strokes my knuckles with his thumb. “I want to be there for you.”

“I know.” I smile at him. “But it would make me feel better if you stayed here and rested.”

“All I’ve been doing is resting,” he whines.

I arch a brow and scowl. He’s lying. I’ve found him tinkering with things around the house three times already. Last night I caught him out in the garage lifting a heavy box. “Don’t argue with me, Rooter. Please just do what I ask.”

Later that night we lay in bed watching a rerun of an old sitcom. Rooter turns on his side and gazes at me with a thoughtful expression.

“I don’t want you to call me Rooter anymore.”

“What?” I gape.

“I want you to call me Jace from now on.”

“You do?” I roll over to face him.

He kisses the top of my hand. “I haven’t been able to talk about it before now, but losing you did something to me. It changed me. When you called me that night… When he pointed his gun at you I knew nothing in this world means as much to me as you do. The only thing that matters is making you happy and being what you need.”

I reach for his face and caress his cheek. He’s been different since the incident with Mike; quiet and overly attentive. “You are what I need. You do make me happy. You don’t need to change.”

“I’m not changing. Rooter will always be my alter ego. Hell, I’m sure the guys in the club will always call me that. But when you look at me that’s not what I want you to see. I want you to see the good in me.”

“I’ve always seen the good in you.”
I saw it before we even met.

He pulls me into his chest and kisses the top of my head.

“I never felt pain like I felt when you asked me to let you go. And it wasn’t just the pain of losing you. It was knowing the pain I caused you.” He leans away and gazes into my eyes. “I know I made this promise before and failed, but I swear I’ll never hurt you again, Sophie. You’re everything to me. I love you.”

“I love you, Rooter,” I cry.

He wipes away my tears. “Jace, baby. Call me Jace.”