Rosalie's Player (17 page)

“It wasn’t supposed to be,” Rosalie admitted.

She’d fallen hard for him. As much as she tried to pretend it was all about the sex, she’d been hoping for more since the beginning. Now that she was finally getting what she’d wished for, she couldn’t help but feel a bit overwhelmed.

“I wouldn’t call it love.” She was certain Holt wouldn’t call it that. No matter how much progress they had made these past few weeks, she still couldn’t label what they were to one another. He was too much of a wild card. Anything could send him running in the opposite direction.

Slow and steady.
That was the best way to handle her pitcher.

“I would.” Sophia wiped the slobber from Ariella’s chin. “I see the way he looks at you. Trust me, coming from a woman who tamed one of the biggest players in the major leagues, Holt wouldn’t stay so focused on you if he wasn’t in it with everything he had.”

“I don’t know.” Rosalie wanted to believe Holt was totally into her. “The sex is off the charts, but it’s the emotional stuff I worry about. He’s guarded and I don’t know if I can break through all of his baggage.”

“So there’s a reason he’s a player?” Sage asked.

“I think so.” Rosalie didn’t want to break Holt’s confidence about his dad, although most people knew the senator wasn’t the most faithful husband. “He might be moving past those issues.”

“Then you should go for it.” Sophia popped Ariella’s pacifier in her mouth when she started to fuss. “You’ll never know if you don’t take a chance.”

“I want to but...” Rosalie pushed her plate away. “It’s complicated.”

“Weren’t you my biggest advocate when Nic and I were getting back together?” Sage asked. “All you did was tell me to take a chance.”

“That was different. Nic’s heart was in it from the beginning. It was you who had doubts.” Rosalie and Holt’s relationship wasn’t anything like Nic and Sage’s. They had a past. Nic loved her for years. He wanted a life with Sage, not just fun and games. “Holt thinks relationships aren’t practical. He’s convinced they don’t work.”

“Change his mind,” Sophia said. “If you believe there can be more for the two of you, then make him see it.”

“How?” Rosalie wasn’t sure she could push him. He’d admitted so much to her last night. Why couldn’t that be enough for now?

“Patience,” Sage said as she handed the fussy baby to her mother. “Lots of it.”

“Keep doing what you’re doing.” Sophia rocked Ari against her chest. “Holt wouldn’t be with you for this long if he didn’t want to be. He’s a one-night kind of guy. You’ve already made progress.”

“I hope you’re right.”

Rosalie couldn’t get the memory of last night out of her head. The way he treated her and the things he said. That had to mean something. She had to stop overthinking the situation and just go with what they were both feeling. Maybe she should book a flight to San Francisco. Keep the momentum going.

Chapter 14

After the game, some of the guys took the back entrance out to the parking lot. They had suffered a huge loss tonight and weren’t in the mood for cameras or fans. They were heading to Bennet’s for a few drinks before calling it an early night. Tomorrow they had a long flight to California and the coach had already told them to take it easy. That usually meant minimal booze and no women. Most of the guys didn’t follow the ‘no women’ rule.

“Tough loss.” Ryder slung his bag over his shoulder.

“No one likes to get their ass handed to them on their home turf.” Holt didn’t like to lose, especially when he wasn’t pitching. Those losses were tougher because he always wondered what he would have done differently had it been him standing on the mound.

“They didn’t sweep us,” Pax said. “That’s all that matters.”

“Maybe if you or I were pitching?” Holt shrugged. “Things might have worked out better.”

“There’s no way to know that.” Nic walked out to the lot. “Chalk this one up and leave it here. We’ll get the next team.”

“Who’s going to Bennet’s?” Holt turned to his team, needing to lighten the mood. “First round shots are on me.”

“I’m going to pass,” Pax said. “I want to get home and see my girls before we hit the road tomorrow.”

“I’ll hang for a bit.” Nic glanced at his watch. “Sage has a headache, so she’s calling it an early night.”

A few others said they would meet them there as they headed for their cars.

“So, it’s a guys’ night out?” Holt hadn’t had one of those in weeks. Not since...

“I’m sure there will be plenty of sexy babes just waiting for us,” Cory, the rambunctious left fielder, said. “As a matter of fact...” He nodded toward the parking lot. “Here comes yours now.”

“So much for that guys’ night out.” Kyle Davis, the third baseman, laughed. “She’s got a tight leash on you, doesn’t she?”

“Can’t you see why?” another teammate said.

Some of the guys snickered, but Holt didn’t find it funny as he tried to block their nonsense out. Rosalie made her way toward him in her tight little shorts and Crushers tank top. Now, all he wanted to do was take her home and show her how much he wanted her.

“She’s fuckin’ hot, so I can see how she’s totally emasculated you,” Cory said. “You’ve been out of commission all season.”

“Fuck you,” Holt said as he walked toward Rosalie. He’d deal with that asshole later. No one had emasculated him.

“Hi.” She flashed a bright smile in his direction.

Why did she have to be so cheery? “What are you doing here?” His body ached to pull her into a tight embrace and possess her lips the only way he could. The way she wanted. Hard, rough, and unforgiving.

“I thought we could ride to Bennet’s together.” She leaned in to kiss him, but he stepped back. “In case you wanted to drink, I could drive you home again.”

“I don’t need a designated driver.”

“I know.” She retreated, looking confused by his failure to reciprocate the kiss.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to, but the loss of the game and Cory riding his ass had him on edge. Not to mention the conversation with his father. Everything seemed to be hitting from every direction and he didn’t know what to do or how to feel.

“I just thought you would want to go together.”

“Listen, the guys are going solo tonight. No one’s bringing a girl.”
I’m such a jerk. Don’t look at me like that.

“Oh, but there’ll be other girls there, right?”

“I guess.” There were always girls there, but he had no interest in them. Didn’t she know that?

“But I can’t come?” He heard the hurt in her voice.

“Clemson? Are you coming? Shots are on you,” one of the guys called out. “We’re thirsty.”

“Ten bucks says he doesn’t come,” someone shouted.

“Oh, he’ll
come
all right,” another snorted.

“It’s just a night with the guys, okay?” He looked over his shoulder to find his whole team waiting on him, making jokes at his expense. “I’ll text you later.”

“Sure.”

“Don’t be upset. I need this night.”

“Upset? Why would I be upset? You won’t even touch me in front of them. Your mood has changed.
It’s not the same as last night.”

“I had a lot to drink last night.” As soon as he said it he wanted to take it back. “I mean—”

“You weren’t drunk this morning,” she cut him off, fisting her hand on her hip.

“Baby, please. I’m trying to work this all out in my head, and I don’t—”

“Let’s go, Holt. We’re getting old here,” Cory yelled as the guys headed to their cars.

“Just go,” Rosalie said. “I shouldn’t have come.”

“No.” He reached for her hand as she turned away. “It’s just that we’ve been spending so much time together and things are going really fast and...”
I’m making a complete ass of myself.

“Well, let me slow them down for you.” She pulled out of his hold. “Don’t let me stand in your way.”

“Don’t be like this,” he said, raising his voice, as he took her hand again. “Haven’t I given you everything I have these past few weeks? I’m doing things your way even when I don’t want to.”

“So now I’m forcing you to be with me?”

“That’s not what I’m saying.” What a complete clusterfuck.

“Let her go.” Nic’s voice boomed from behind him. “She wants to leave.”

“Just what I fuckin’ need,” Holt mumbled. “Call him off right now, because I’m not finished.”

“I am.” His little spark plug picked now to exert her fiery disposition?

“Rosalie.”

“He’s right, I want to go.”

Why did those words scare him so much?

“For the record, I’m not mad because you want to hang out with the guys.” Rosalie tugged her arm back. “Don’t set Nic off.”

“Rosie,” Nic said. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” She took a deep breath, holding back those glistening tears that Holt had caused. Seeing her so disappointed felt like he’d taken a punch to the gut. A well-deserved punch.

They could both see she wasn’t fine. Holt had hurt her, and now all he wanted to do was take those past few minutes back. Why couldn’t he express himself better? Be the man she wanted? Fuck! He was his father’s son.

“I was just leaving.” She stared at Holt. “Have fun tonight.”

“Wait.” Holt went after her, but Nic held him back. “Get off me.”

“Leave her alone,” Nic said as Rosalie got into her car and sped out of the parking lot.

“What’s your problem?” Holt turned and glared at him. “This is none of your business. You have no right to get in between the two of us.”

“In all the years I’ve known her, I’ve never seen her look so defeated. I told you not to screw with her.”

“She’s fine.” Holt gritted his teeth because he didn’t want to hear what a jerk he was. “It’s between me and her. Mind your fucking business, Cordova, or I swear to God, I’ll—”

“You’ll what?” Nic shoved him, knocking him into a parked car.

“Stay out of this.” Holt stepped toward Nic, ramming him back, but Nic must have expected it because he didn’t even lose his footing as he clenched his fist and connected with Holt’s jaw.

Shit, that hurt!

Just as Holt retaliated, hitting Nic hard in the mouth, the other guys were on them. Ryder held Holt back as Pax grabbed Nic and pushed him out of Holt’s line of sight.

“Nic, don’t,” Pax yelled. “We’re in a public parking lot for fuck sake.”

“I’m good.” Nic blew out a breath. “I’m good.”

“Get off me!” Holt tried to get out of Ryder’s hold. “I mean it.”

“Not until you calm down,” Ryder said. “What the hell are you thinking?”

“I wasn’t.”
She has me so twisted.
“I’m cool.”

“Holt.” Pax came toward him. “This is not cool. You can’t fight with a teammate.”

“I know. It won’t happen again,” he assured him. “I was wrong.”

“It was my fault.” Nic stepped forward, his lip dripping blood. “I started it.”

“You had good reason to,” Holt admitted as Ryder let him go. “Why don’t you guys head over to Bennet’s? Nic and I need to make this right.”

The rest of the team cleared out, but Pax hung back.

“Nic, you’re not going to lose it again, are you?” Pax asked.

“No. I want to talk to Holt.”

“I’ll wait in my car until you’re done,” Pax said. “Holt, don’t piss him off.”

“I won’t.” Holt leaned against a car and rubbed his jaw as Pax walked away. “You have a hard right hook.”

“You didn’t do so bad yourself.” Nic spat out blood. “I’m sorry I lost my temper, but you made her cry and that didn’t sit well with me.”

“I deserved it.” Holt took off his cap and ran his fingers through his hair, the memory of Rosalie’s hurt etched in his brain. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“Love is hard.”

“Love? No, that’s not what...” He sighed. “Like I said, I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“Rosie can be a whirlwind of ideas and emotions. She’s a bit overwhelming at times, but she’s got a good heart. She feels deeply. Hell, if it wasn’t for her in my corner, I never would’ve gotten back with Sage. If you don’t think you can handle her, then cut her loose.”

“If I can’t handle her?” Holt thought about it for a moment. “This isn’t about me and my dog ways, is it?”

“Not at all.” Nic laughed. “I know my Rosie girl can hold her own with a dog like you. She’s an amazing woman. Takes after her sister.” He grinned, and for the first time Holt understood what Pax and Nic were feeling when it came to their girls. “She’ll invest everything she has in you. She already has. It looked like you might be falling under her spell too. Sage kept telling me to leave you alone, and I would have, but whatever happened between you two tonight...well, I could see she didn’t have any more to give.”

“I’m an asshole, incapable of being who she wants.” It was better he admitted it now than to hurt her anymore. He refused to be his father. If there were no expectations then he couldn’t destroy her the way his father had hurt his mother all of these years.

“You need to get out of your own way. If you want to be with her, then work harder.”

“I’ve tried, Nic.” More than he ever thought he could. “But at the end of the day, I’m not worthy of loving her the way she deserves.”

“It takes a big man to admit that. Certainly not the player the media makes you out to be. If you honestly think you’re not the guy for her, then walk away before you really kill her spirit.” Nic placed his hand on Holt’s shoulder. “Because the next time you make her cry, I’ll break your jaw.”

“I’m not going to make her cry anymore,” Holt vowed. He knew what he had to do. “I swear.”

“Good.” Nic extended his hand. “Let’s forget tonight ever happened.”

“Works for me.” He shook Nic’s hand, knowing he could forget what happened between the two of them, but making amends with Rosalie would be harder. “Good thing Sage wasn’t here or else she’d be doing a feature on it.”

“She still might.” Nic winced. “I need to get some ice on this before I get home or she’s going to hand it to me.”

“Good luck.”

“You too, man.” He headed for his car.

“Nic.”

“Yeah?” He turned and waited for Holt to speak.

“Thank you.”

“I hope you can resolve whatever demons you’re carrying around, because if not, you’re gonna miss out on one hell of a woman.”