Ross 04 Take Me On (31 page)

He nodded, taking the setback with good grace. But then he leaned in, and she felt the tip of his finger nudge her chin upward. She closed her eyes, her pulse accelerated, and his lips brushed hers.

And…nothing. No rush of fevered adrenaline, no desperate need to grab him and drag him into her apartment and have her way with him. As quickly as her pulse had spiked, it fell in disappointment. She did little more than tolerate his kiss until finally he drew away, smiling.

Oh no.

“Good night, Gabriella,” he said and turned to go, seeming very pleased with himself. Probably certain he’d given her something to think about.

He had, all right. Fighting tears, she went into her apartment and threw herself back against the closed door, breathing deep. She couldn’t waste any more tears on Ian Rhodes. She couldn’t. Damn him.

The deluge burst forth and streamed down her face despite all her efforts.

She
hated
him.

He’d already knocked on her door once, only to find she wasn’t home yet. Praying she would be eventually, he’d retreated to his bike and contemplated his next move—having no idea what it was—when the dark BMW had pulled in several spaces down.

He hadn’t wanted to watch—hell, he’d wanted to march up to them and make his presence known—but some sick need had kept him rooted to his spot, staring on helplessly as that asshole leaned in to kiss his Gabby.

Problem was, Ian was as much an asshole as that guy, wasn’t he? And if she were really his, she wouldn’t have felt the need to give Mark another shot. He thought he might break under the weight of the guilt that crashed down on him all at once.

All his fault. Every bit of it.

He waited until the doctor—tall, good-looking, obviously filthy loaded—descended the stairs, got back into his expensive fucking car and drove away.

Gabby had long since shut the door. He debated calling her, alerting her that he was here, but…no. Whatever reaction he got from her, good or bad, he wanted it to be the true one. Candid and unrehearsed. He bolted up the stairs to her door and knocked, hoping he wouldn’t scare the shit out of her.

He didn’t have to wait long. It flew open, and she stood there, her heels making her almost as tall as him, those green eyes flashing. As inwardly ravaged as he was from just having watched her kiss another man, she took his breath away, the upsweep of her hair exposing her graceful neck and dewy shoulders.

“What the hell are you doing here?” she demanded.

No, not scared. And definitely not happy. Pissed the fuck off. As soon as she gave in to that anger, though, she deflated. Her expression all but collapsed, and for the first time, the light from the living room caught on the fresh tears on her cheeks. They were smeared, as if she’d tried to wipe them away, hide them from him, before flinging the door open.

He didn’t wait for her invite. Surging forward, he caught her face in his hands, feeling that dampness on his palms, assuring himself it was real. “Ian,” she breathed, her eyes taking in the measure of his face, seeming to drink him in.

Another man’s kiss was fresh on her lips. He struggled to contain his desperation to wipe that memory away from her. Her hands slid up his forearms, clamping on his wrists. All at once, she wrenched herself away from him. “I can’t deal with you right now.”

“Gabby… Please hear me out.”

“I haven’t heard much of anything from you for nearly a month. Now I’m supposed to listen just because you say so?” Damn stubborn woman. Brian had tried to warn him from the start. He hadn’t listened, and he was damn glad of that. But still. “What have you been doing, lurking in my bushes? How long have you been out there?”

“Not too long, but long enough.”

“You saw us.”

“Baby, I’m not even— I understand, okay? I do.”

“You
don’t
understand. You can’t possibly understand what I’m going through. I don’t want your fucking pity, I just don’t ever want to hear you say those words to me again. Because it isn’t possible.”

“All I meant was that I understand why you might turn back to him. You’re here all alone, and it’s my fault. I can’t put the blame on anyone else. I didn’t want you to alienate your family, Gabby. You need them more than you need me. You can’t tell me
that
much isn’t true.”

“Then what the hell are you doing here? You’ve made your decision, apparently. So be on your way.”

“What would you have me do? Make you give everything up? That’s a hell of a position you’re putting me in. You told me from the start you didn’t want anyone making decisions for you. So I backed off.” He wanted to tell her everything was all right, that he’d made it that way. Hell, he didn’t know how she would take to
that
news now.

“I presented you with other options, and you didn’t want to take them.
And that’s okay.
I told you from the start that I would do this on my own, and you didn’t have to be involved. You should’ve left it like that! If that’s the way you really wanted it, then why did you have to lead me on and make me think you…” She dissolved into hiccupping sobs. Oh God. He couldn’t bear it. He wrapped her in his arms, withstanding her brief struggles until she finally collapsed against him, all but boneless.

“That’s not the way I want it. I love you,” he said, his voice cracking as he closed his eyes and pulled her closer still. Her hands fisted in his T-shirt, wetness spreading through the fabric from her tears. “I love you so fucking much. I can’t be without you anymore.”

Twice in one night, she’d heard things she’d needed to hear for a long time from two different men. She hadn’t expected either of them, though, to put her in this predicament.

Mark still wanted her. She could go with him and reclaim her security, her much-needed stability. The support of her family. But she’d sacrifice her child growing up with his or her father…and now she knew she’d sacrifice the blazing sexual chemistry, the fireworks that she’d never known with anyone else.

Ian wanted her. With him, she would be giving up pretty much everything except their little family being together, standing strong against everything the world threw at them…but the intensity of the feelings between them, the understanding, the connection might just be worth it. And he was here now ready to fight for her too.

When he slipped from her grasp and went to his knees in front of her, she gasped, unstable on her jellied legs. Only his hands around her hips held her steady. His hazel eyes lifted to meet hers, and the emotion she saw in their depths robbed her of breath. Her heart lurched into her throat; her pulse throbbed so hard she could feel it everywhere. She shook with the force of it.

“I love you,” he said again, and while she didn’t think there were actual tears in his eyes, they were a little misty. “Gabriella, you’re carrying the only family I have, but it’s more than that. It’s you. If you hadn’t been so far out of my league, I’d have fought to keep you in my life even before the baby, but I thought it was hopeless. That there was no use in trying. There’s probably no use in trying now. But if you’ll forgive me, I swear to God and you and anyone else you want me to swear to, I’ll be with you. I’ll protect you and our baby and any others we might have. I can’t promise I’ll be able to give you everything you deserve, but I can promise you that you’ll have all of me. Forever.”

She’d never seen such sincerity or longing, such heartbreak, as she saw in his face right then. So much simultaneous hope and despair, as if he knew the thing he so fervently prayed for was most likely out of his reach. There was nothing to do but pitch herself down into his arms, and he squeezed her so tight she couldn’t draw what little breath her emotions would allow.

Oh God. What would they do? It didn’t matter. Somehow, someway, they would make it work—she would do whatever she had to. To hell with everyone else. It would indeed be their little family, their little trio, standing strong against everyone else.

“I love you,” she said, the words pouring from her, unstoppable. “And I love everything you just said too. It’s all I want, Ian. You’re enough for me. I don’t need anything else.”

“Really? You would give it all up for me? Medical school even?”

She didn’t want to. She’d already worked so hard. But…yes. When she thought of a future without
this
, without this feeling of safety and love, without the strength and solidity of him against her…she would. She would have to. She might die without him. She
had
been dying, hadn’t she?

“Yes.” Her eyes closed to keep a fresh torrent of tears from falling. So many dreams she’d be giving up, all to have another.

“Baby,” he said into her neck, inhaling her scent and seeming to relax into her. “There’s something else I need to tell you.”

Dread kicked her in the gut. “What?”

“I went to see you parents. It’s all good. We have their blessing.”

Seizing him by the shoulders, she wrenched herself back and stared incredulously at his face. Did she even dare to hope…? “
What?
”

“I saw them before I came here. I can’t say they were overjoyed, but they said whatever you decided, they would support. If that means what I think it means, they’re okay with us now.” He chuckled, and she knew it had to be because of whatever look was on her face. “Brian helped me,” he went on, “so unfortunately, you might owe him big-time.”

“I love that little shit.”

Laughing, he drew her back into his arms. “So we’re okay. For now I might go back to work for Marco, but I want to do more. I will. I promised your folks.”

“Ian, I don’t care. If you love what you do, then please stick with it. We’ll be all right. That’s their hang-up, not mine.”

“To me, it’s only a job like any other. It’s not my life’s ambition like it is for Brian or those other guys. Actually,
you’re
my ambition.” He stroked her cheek with his thumb, and the way he looked at her lips then, like he
wanted
them, made her blood surge.

“I do have an idea for you, though.”

“Yeah? I’m all ears.”

She grinned. “What we talked about before. Massage therapy. You can start with me.”

He kissed her—at last!—and the hunger that consumed her was almost frightening in its intensity. She’d have been more than happy to do it on the floor, but yeah—her door still stood wide open. Any observant neighbors might have thought she was insane, kissing one man and then making out wildly on the floor with another. The former wasn’t one of her prouder moments, especially knowing Ian had seen, but whatever. Hopefully she was done suffering indignities for a long, long time.

They broke apart, and Ian got up to close the door when she laughingly pointed it out. Then he helped her to her feet, where she promptly kicked her heels off and pulled his head down to her again. So good, so sweet to feel his mouth on hers again, his tongue invading in its teasing way.

Groaning against him, she pressed her body closer, fitting every inch of herself to every inch of him that she could. His hands roamed down her back and cupped her ass, grinding her against him. Heat pooled in her belly, flowed languidly out to all her limbs, weakening her while strengthening her need. She slid one leg up, hooking it around his hip, and his hand followed the long, lean muscle of her thigh. Her bare skin tingled under the warmth of his touch. Other places tingled in the anticipation of it.

“I missed you,” he murmured. She couldn’t even explain how much she’d missed him. Like a part of her was gone. Or rather, the piece of himself that he’d left with her was crying out for him.

“I don’t even want to remember how much I missed you,” she said. “Just be with me now. Make it all go away.”

Heat flared in his gaze. His kiss blazed through her senses again, and all at once his hands were everywhere. Squeezing her ass, then stroking her breasts, and everywhere in between. Finally in her hair, pulling it down, sending pins flying, and she almost laughed against his mouth as the silky strands tumbled around her shoulders.

Finally. Finally, she had a guy who would demolish her updo. As ridiculous as it seemed, that moment somehow confirmed everything she already knew. This was right. This was perfection.

They somehow made it to her bedroom, flinging clothes in every direction until she landed on the mattress, his hard half-naked body between her legs. Besides his jeans, only her panties remained between them, and she wrestled with the button on his jeans, trying to eliminate one of those barriers. When he slipped from her hands to slide down her body, she whimpered in frustration.

But his kisses slid down with him, teasing along her breasts, then lower. His hand spread over her stomach, the pressure of it warm and gentle. It was too early to feel any movement within, but she liked to think the life inside her surged with happiness at his nearness. “You’re starting to show,” he said, his voice tinged with wonder.

“I think so,” she whispered. He moved his hand to sprinkle more warm kisses around her belly button, which tickled as much as they enticed. She giggled, wriggling under him, stroking her fingers through his hair. It had grown. She liked that. Something to grab on to—and the thought of that first inexorable thrust had her licking her lips. “Ian, please…don’t make me wait.”

He did, though, taking his time pulling down her panties, lightly kissing and licking places that were craving a much more substantial touch. She loved the sight of his big hand dragging the scrap of lace down her thighs, his mouth smearing erotically over the places he revealed.