Round N Around We Go (Has Cupid Gone Mad?) (10 page)

Amber opens the door and greets
Karina with the warmest kisses
on both cheeks. Gratified, she
shows her in and assures her
that she is feeling fine.

Taylor is nowhere in sight.
“Where is Taylor? I’m hungry
already.” Karina warms up the
dinner that Taylor has prepared
in advance.

“Me too.” Amber adds. “She said
she’d be home an hour ago but
maybe she is stuck in traffic.”

Karina reaches for her bag,
pulls out her phone and calls
Taylor, reaching her voicemail
she hangs up impatiently and
complains, “Does anyone answer
the phone anymore?”

Amber chokes on her Pelligrino.
“Are you being sarcastic?” She
laughs.
Karina smiles and takes a nibble
of
a
stalk
of
celery.
“Everything looks delicious! She
must have spent hours cooking.”
Hungrily, she picks and tastes
everything.

Amber pours a shot of vodka for
Karina, “This should release
your tension. You look really
stressed.”

Karina sighs and breaks the news
of Theodore’s death. Reminded of
the sadness, she sits on the
barstool
and
mourns.
She
genuinely misses him
and is
distraught beyond words.

“Not really.” Karina gulps down
the shot of vodka and feels the
alcohol rush through her body.
“But I’ll be fine.”

Just about to pour a second shot
of vodka,
Karina hears the
ringtone of her phone and runs
to the kitchen to answer it.
“Taylor, where are you?” She
asks impatiently.
Amber walks over to Karina,
raises an eyebrow and studies
the shocked expression on her
face.

“Unbelievable!” Karina rubs her
forehead in disbelief. “Okay I’m
coming.”

“At Mount Sinai Hospital.”
Karina picks up her car keys,
“Let me see, she is admitted
with a broken leg and fractured
ribs. Apparently her publisher
friend got drunk and pushed her
off the stairs.” Karina looks at
Amber blankly, “Amber you should
stay and rest, I can go alone.”

“Nonsense!” Amber demands to go
along. “You girls are family to
me. Besides, we can visit Conrad
at the same time.”

Karina laughs at Amber’s joke,
“Now who is sarcastic?” She
laughs along but deep inside,
she is distressed. Truth in the
matter is, she is about to lose
control and is trying her best
to keep it together.

Given pain medication, they find
Taylor sound
asleep in the
hospital bed. Seeing her leg
wrapped in a cast and her body
packed by bandages, they begin
to feel sorry and remain quiet.

Just
yesterday
Amber
was
admitted, Conrad just got out of
the ICU, Theodore is dead and
now Karina is hugely depressed.
Trying her impossible to remain
calm, she has the urge of
screaming as loudly as she could
but chooses to swallow the
despair.

Amber decides to check on Conrad
while waiting for Taylor to wake
up. Karina nods and sinks into a
chair. Waiting silently, she
dozes off and is awakened by the
shuffling
sounds
of
harsh
hospital sheets brushing against
each other. She peeps through
halfway opened eyes and see
Taylor waking up.

“Are you ok?” Karina walks over
and holds her hand. “Amber just
left to check on Conrad, she is
here too.”

“I’m so sorry I spoiled dinner.”
She tries to laugh but her ribs
hurt.

Taylor recounts her meeting with
publisher friend Rafael Levine,
which apparently has not turn
out too well.

Rafael’s attraction for Taylor
is
obviously
one
sided.
Disrespectfully, the entire time
his hands are all over Taylor
and he makes
her extremely
uncomfortable. After devouring
an entire bottle of aged
whiskey, he continues ordering
shots and got drunk.

At the spur of the moment while
leaving the bar, he tries to
kiss her by the top of the
staircase and as she leans
backward to avoid his kiss, he
loses balance and accidentally
pushes her. Stumbling backwards,
she loses balance and rolls down
the marble staircase, and hits
her head on the marble slab at
the bottom of the stairs.
“I’m
just
lucky
to
have
survived.” Taylor attempts to
laugh lightly. “The doctor is
surprised that I don’t have a
concussion.”

“Oh my God.” Karina exclaims,
“I’ll make sure they do a
catscan, you don’t want a
relapse.” Karina holds her hand
firmly.

“Karina,” Taylor looks at her
intently, “I need a huge favor
from you and Amber.”

“What is it?” Karina asks
softly. “Whatever you need,
consider it done.”

Taylor pauses for a moment and
continues, “Do not tell Ivan
about this. I don’t want him to
know.”

A little baffled, Karina seeks
explanation, “Why? You should
tell him honestly. Seriously,
just because he sent you on a
hiatus does not mean that he
doesn’t love you. I’m sure he
cares!”
Taylor feels flushed to admit
her embarrassment. “First of
all, it’s been a month and he
hasn’t called me once. Second of
all, he’ll probably laugh and
thinks that I deserve it. He
doesn’t know that I am looking
for another publisher. Frankly,
I feel defeated.” Taylor turns
away for a second and returns
her gaze. “Please keep this a
secret for me. Don’t call him.”

Karina
disagrees
with
her
decision but will comply with
her request. After all, this is
her life and her choices are to
be honored.

“Taylor, I must warn you though.
Once
you
keep
a
secret,
everything else becomes a lie to
cover up everything else. The
circle is ferocious and has no
end.” Karina detests secrets and
speaks the words of truth.

Unable
to
convince
her
otherwise, Karina gives up and
squeezes Taylor’s hand. “If
things between you and Ivan go
terribly wrong in the future,
don’t say I haven’t warned you.”
Taylor nods and replies softly.
“It’s ok Karina. This has to
remain a secret. Ivan can not
know about this.”

Amber pretends to be unaffected
and appears cohesive, but deep
inside, she is haunted by the
ordeal and is trying her best to
deal with her emotions.

Attempting to block out the
memories of the past two days,
she shudders and shuns the
thoughts of Neyo. Finding it
impossible
to
forget
the
horrific experience of being
held captive, she remembers
every single detail of what he
has done to her. From being held
at knife point, the bondage, to
being temporarily paralyzed by
the Ketamine
that he has
continuously injected her with,
each
second
endured
was
torturously horrific.

She feels fortunate to have
survived Neyo’s well concealed
bipolar extremities and manic
episode. She recalls the final
moment of desperation when he is
about to slit her wrist then
take his own life, and how
desperately helpless she feels
when she hears Conrad shouting
and pounding on Neyo’s door.

She shuts her eyes and shudders
on the thought of how she
frightened she feels, lying
helplessly paralyzed by the drug
that he has injected into her
body. All she could do is lying
there and watching Conrad losing
the fist fight and she couldn’t
help him.

She
remembers
how
Neyo
completely loses control and
stabs Conrad multiple times in
the chest. She recalls the
unbearable pain that she feels
in her heart as she watches
Conrad bleeds unconsciously on
the floor, covered in a pool of
his own blood.

Having reached the
point of
hysteria, she can’t remember the
police arriving or how they
captured Neyo and how she ended
up in the hospital.

Thankful that the incident is
over and that everyone has
survived the ordeal, she says
and silent prayer and wishes for
his love to recover expediently
without complications.

Amber hears Conrad calling her
and opens her eyes. Her mind
quickly drifts back to reality
when she sees his loving smile.
She walks over to his hospital
bed and holds his hand firmly.
“How are you feeling today?” She
leans over and kisses him gently
on the lips.

Conrad stirs and mutters, “I’m
feeling much better today but
you look pale Amber. You need to
go home and get some rest. I’m
going to be out of commission
for a while and the cast needs
you. Honey, the show must go
on.”

Amber puts her finger on his
lips and silences him. “Shhhhh,
I want to stay here with you.
Lizzie is being an incredible
assistant. They’re rehearsing
today without us. As you say,
the show must go on.”
He grabs her hand and kisses it.
“What about Sylvester? Is he
nearly ready?”

Spontaneously, Amber presses her
lips firmly against his and
showers him with her love.
“Don’t worry about anything
alright? I’ll work him up once
your vitals are stable. The most
important thing for me is to
make sure you recover.” She
pauses as their gaze interlock,
“I need you Conrad and can’t
wait to take you home.”

“Wait
a
minute,”
Conrad
disputes, “you can’t take me
home.” He looks at her with a
serious expression on his face.

“Because I, am going to take you
home.” Conrad smiles. “I already
made plans and you’re going to
be extremely busy for a really
long time.”

“How long?” She blushes and
bites her lower lip.
Conrad smiles devotedly, “How
about forever?” He pulls her
hand to cover his left chest,
“Feel my heart beating beneath
these bandages?”

“I’ve just realized that life is
way too vulnerable and I want to
spend the rest of my life loving
you. Nothing would make me a
happier man.” Wholeheartedly he
continues, “Too bad I can’t bend
on my knees right this moment,
but Amber Winters, would you
marry me?”

Yet
to
recover
from
the
tormenting
emotional
ordeal,
Amber does not expect his
proposal at such an awkward
timing and hesitates.

Quickly and cleverly disguising
her own insecurities and not to
hurt his pride, Amber smiles,
leans
over
and
whispers
playfully into her ear, “I will
answer you only when you’re
fully recovered and laying naked
in my arms.” She brushes her
lips against his tenderly and
adds, “How’s that for an
incentive for getting well
quickly?”

Undoubting her love and enjoying
her teasing ways, Conrad laughs
and feels a sharp pain running
through he unhealed stab wounds
and covers his chest, “Ouch!” He
reciprocates her playfulness.
“Your rejection hurts more than
the stab wounds!” He jokes with
a smile.

Amber loves Conrad but is not
quite sure if she’d like to be
married again. In her mind, for
as long as there is love, they
will always be together. However
contradicting and not entirely
opposed to the idea, she returns
his joke with the ironic truth,
“I’m not rejecting your proposal
my love, I am just stalling
time.”

Feeling an increased pain in his
chest, he realizes that the
morphine is wearing out and
calls for a nurse. Looking at
Amber while the nurse injects
another dose of medication into
his IV line, he urges Amber to
head home to get some rest. “I’m
not
going
anywhere
honey,
promise I’ll be right here when
you come back tomorrow. Go home
and get some rest.”

Reluctantly she agrees and
kisses him goodnight. “Sleep
tight baby, I’ll come back
tomorrow afternoon.”

Conrad watches her leave and
lets out a groan. Clenching his
teeth and fighting the pain
away, he waits desperately for
the morphine to take effect. He
doesn’t want to worry her, but
he is not feeling well at all.

Unaware of his pain and the
extent
of
his
unstable
condition, Amber walks into
Taylor’s room and finds Karina
scribbling on Taylor’s cast. “Oh
I want to sign it too!”

Taylor chuckles, “Oh yes I need
your
autograph,
Miss
Mega
Broadway Star.”
Karina hands the permanent
marker to Amber, “Now the cast
is valuable.”

“Ha ha ha. That’s oddly funny.”
Amber rolls her eyes and while
scribbling on Taylor’s cast, she
announces Conrad’s proposal and
admits her hesitation.

“Are you serious?” Taylor seems
shocked, “The man is one in a
million and you’re not sure?”

Still scribbling, Amber tries to
justify her own insecurities, “I
am certain that I want to spend
the rest of my life with him,
but I not sure if I want to get
married again. Does that make
sense?”

Conrad’s
courageousness
and
unfaltering true love for Amber
has completely won Taylor’s
vote. Favoring him and standing
on his side, Taylor speaks
adamantly, “Girlie, you don’t
know how lucky you are. I
promise I won’t bitch about the
ugly bridesmaid dresses that
you’re going to pick out for
us.”
Karina seconds and adds her sad
remark,
“Taylor
is
right.
Happiness is not for granted
Amber. If by marrying him you
would make him a happy man, then
you should give it to him. He
deserves it. Heck, I think he
has earned it.”

“Yes I know that’s what he
wants, but shouldn’t I take into
consideration of what I want?”
Amber wonders and begins to feel
confused.

“My God.” Taylor shakes her
head, “The man is
ready to
selflessly risk his own life to
protect you, and you’re worried
about
your
own
selfish
insecurities? If that is the
case then I’m sorry to say this,
I love you Amber but I don’t
think you deserve him.”

************
Karina drops off Amber at her
condo and drives home in
silence. Turning off the radio,
she mulls over her sadness and
mourns Theodore. Trying to
overcome his mysterious death,
she attempts to focus on the
riddle that he has left her
with. Clueless and overwhelmed
by
frustration,
she
pulls
sharply into her parking space,
turns off the engine of her Audi
and begins to cry. She leans her
head on top of the steering
wheel
and
starts
sobbing
uncontrollably. She hits her
head on the steering wheel a few
times and self inflict physical
pain to surpass the hurt and
emptiness that she feels inside.

She remembers how she feels
suicidal over Alex’s death, and
recognizes the same depressive
emotions that she is feeling for
Theodore’s misfortune.

She props up and sighs. Wiping
away her tears she screams as
loudly as possible, “Where is
happiness?”
Shivering,
she
becomes angry and dashes up a
flight of stairs, madly searches
for her key and jams it into the
keyhole
of
the
doorknob.
Agitatedly she flings open the
door and slams it shut with a
loud bang.

As if insanity has taken over,
she rushes madly to the other
side of her loft and unrolls the
piece of old canvas that she has
inherited
from
Theodore.
Bringing out her tool box, she
nails the canvas on the center
of a huge blank wall and stares
into while swaying from side to
side.

As if guided by an unknown
force, she feels anger and rage.
She shuts her eyes and hears
people crying in her mind. She
feels coldness, she smells death
and the odor of her fowl
fascination
strangles
her.
Opening her eyes abruptly, she
gasps for air and reaches for
her paint box. Oozing different
color oil paints onto a piece of
thin plywood, she decides to
ditch the paintbrushes and dips
her fingers into the paint.
She stares into the blank canvas
and murmurs, “Please take me
away from here.”
Not knowing what to paint, she
shuts her eyes and allows her
mind’s eyes to guide her
movements
freely
without
inhibitions. She channels the
energy that she’s feeling onto
the canvas, dedicating each
movement to Theodore’s freed
spirit. Feeling his pain, she
pours
her
soul
into
the
expression. Her existence is
merged into the art form and for
hours and hours, she disappears
from the realm of reality and
submerges herself into the
vibrations of her soul.

Energy depleted and feeling
exhausted, she takes a deep
breath and dips her palm onto
thick layers of colors on the
plywood then presses her color
coated palm onto the center of
the painting.

All her emotions are outlet onto
the canvas and she begins to
feel lighter. “Much better,” she
mumbles and takes a step back to
review her freshly painted art.
Studying her own work, she
stares
into
the
painting
blankly. “Theodore, this one’s
for you.”

Utterly disoriented, Karina is
startled
awake
by
the
ridiculously loud buzz of her
intercom. She sits up abruptly
and looks around her loft to
find herself in the safety of
her own haven. Unsure of how
much time has passed since she
went to sleep, she climbs out of
bed and feeling lightheaded, she
stumbles forward a few steps
before regaining balance.

Covering her ears and protecting
her head from
bursting, she
screams madly at the intercom,
“Stop buzzing!”

She drags herself to the open
kitchen and screams into the
intercom, “Who is this?” Rubbing
her head and trying to ease the
emerging migraine, she hears
Ivan’s voice over the speaker.
“Karina, this is Ivan.”

Startled, Karina remembers that
Taylor is in the hospital with a
broken leg and fractured ribs.
“Shit. Now what?” She mumbles to
herself and presses on the
button of the intercom, “Taylor
is not here.”

“It doesn’t matter, Karina
please let me in. I’ll wait for
her.” Ivan insists.

Trying to find an excuse and
something clever to say, she
responds quickly, “It doesn’t
matter, Ivan. I’m not in the
mood for company. I’ll ask
Taylor to call you when she
comes home.”

“Karina!” Ivan objects, “That’s
unacceptable. I’ve left her over
a hundred messages over the past
few days. What’s going on? Let
me in!”
Reluctantly, Karina buzzes him
in. “Fine, but you can’t stay
for long. I have things to do.”

While waiting for Ivan to arrive
at her door, she desperately
scrambles for a cover story to
give Taylor the alibi that she
has asked for.

“Think, think, think, Karina.
Think!” She paces back and
forth. She hears Ivan’s knock on
the door and tries to gather her
thoughts. She’s not accustomed
to lying and doesn’t know how to
begin.

Taking a few deep breaths, she
opens and door and stares at
Ivan blankly, “I told you.
Taylor is not here.”