Read Royal Prick (A Stepbrother Romance) Online
Authors: J.L. Beck
Chapter Seventeen
-Royal
I needed a cold shower and I needed it right fucking now. I was beyond grateful when I found out that Viviana wasn’t home yet, and that I could jump right into the shower without having to worry about what would be happening to Noelle while I was otherwise preoccupied. I was a man that needed to take care of himself, and I was going to do so right fucking now.
I headed straight toward my bedroom, and the second the door closed behind me I was pulling away my clothing, ripping off my shirt and pants at mach speed. The clothes were too much. The friction they were causing against my skin was more than I could handle.
I needed to rid myself of these thoughts and feelings I was having for Noelle. I needed to restrain myself from walking right across the hall to Noelle’s room, pulling all the clothes from her body, and fucking the shit out of her. We were far too close to each other back there in the car, we were far too close to go further than I knew she was ready for. It took everything in me not to prove to her just how much I really wanted her and just how right we would be together.
She was in my head and under my skin all day, every day. From the minute I woke up until the time I fell asleep, she was all that was running through my head, and now it seemed she was my reason for needing to beat off. God I was so fucking screwed, and not even in a good way.
I turned the faucet over as hot as it would go, allowing the bathroom to fill with steam. I stood in front of the mirror waiting for the water to get hot. I stared at the reflection showing back at me. My dark brown hair a mess from where Noelle ran her fingers through it, my light blue eyes tired but hungry. I could see the small bruise still healing from the fight with Dom and the tension in my muscles.
There was a small scar above my right eye where I was cut with a knife in a fight back when I lived with my mom. That life and the things I went through seemed to be ages ago, although it couldn’t have been more than a few months ago. It’s amazing how life can change a person in just a short amount of time.
The life I was living now wasn’t anything to be proud of. I still fought, and I was definitely still pissed off at Mark. I hated Viviana. I was still just fucking chicks for fun, but Noelle… she was different. A whole other perspective to things. Parts of her made me want to be a better person, while the other parts of her made me feel content just being the person I was. Noelle didn’t try and change me. She didn’t care about what people said about me. She saw the good I had in me when everyone else saw the bad. They didn’t care to investigate deeper into the situation.
We were on each other’s team, and today proved that more than ever. Noelle was done giving a fuck about what people said to her, a point I had already hit. I pulled the shower curtain back and stepped into the hot spray, the water easing my muscles as soon as it hit my skin. Being around Noelle when I wanted to do nothing but devour her caused me so much anxiety. It literally pained me to be within touching distance of her and not be able to do a damn thing to ease myself.
I couldn’t touch her, kiss her, or even look at her without the need to take her and claim her as my own, and I fucking would. I might be a bad man, I might fight and hurt people, but I would never do anything to hurt her. I would never betray her or talk down to her the way that others have.
I gripped my cock in my hand, leaning my head against the tile wall of the shower stroking myself rigorously to the mental image of Noelle in nothing but her pink bra and panties.
“Do you want this cock, baby?” My voice cracked, and desire dripped from my words. Her eyes looked deeply into mine with uncertainty. God, she was so fucking fragile and precious. One of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. She was like the moon, parts of her were always staying hidden.
The scene played out before my eyes, my mind the canvas that it was playing upon. I was painting a vivid dream that would never take place.
Noelle’s body was laid out on top of my sheets. Her naked body glimmered in the light as beads of sweat started to form on her chest and roll down her body. I wanted to lick them away, and nibble on that plump bottom lip of hers. My finger gliding from the tip of her collar bone down her sweet, perfect torso until landing right above her mound. Would she let me fuck her raw? Like I wanted? Would she be able to handle the dark and dirty that I was?
I pumped harder into my hand, my pace and grip almost painful. The hot water sprayed against my back, adding to the pleasure that was tingling throughout my body. Every single stroke pushed me closer to the edge, every image of Noelle flashing before my eyes made my cock harder— forcing my cock into a relentless battle. Oh how I wanted to come, but at the same time didn’t because when I did that meant the dream and images of Noelle letting me fuck her were gone.
“Fuck!” I gritted out, cum spurting from deep within me. My belly coiled, and then exploded as another hot spurt released against the wall. My toes dug into the tile floor, and I leaned my whole body against the wall the pleasure overtaking me for a second. I’ve never come so hard over just the image of a girl.
She’s not just a girl.
My body reminded me of that just now. Noelle owned me in the worst way. I masturbated like a thirteen-year-old boy just hitting puberty instead of the experienced player that I was. She owned me in a way that was terrifying. I didn’t understand how she weaseled her way under my skin, but I was starting to realize that the feelings I was having weren’t just going to go away.
Sometimes home has a heartbeat, and Noelle was my home.
My heartbeat. My all.
I finished my shower, washing my body from head to toe, then rinsing the sins of what I had just done away. As soon as I finished, I stepped out of the shower grabbing a towel from the hanger and wrapped it around my waist.
I was a fucking mess. I was wound tighter than a spring. Each day that passed put the spring that much closer to exploding. The thoughts refused to go away. I couldn’t get the images of her out of my head even as I walked out of the bathroom and into my bedroom. My body tensed as soon as I saw her sitting there on the edge of my bed. Didn’t she realize how perfect it was for her to be on my bed? Especially after what I just pictured. It would have been so much better if she had really been in it.
“Ummm…” She looked up at me and then covered her face with her hands. “I’m so sorry…” The apology came from out of nowhere, and I of course smirked pulling my towel away from my body. I had nothing to hide from her. In fact, I wanted her to see me, all of me.
“Don’t be sorry, I don’t have shit to hide and it’s not like you haven’t seen me in all my glory already,” I commented, watching her face, which was still covered; except now I noticed she had parted her fingers slightly, making me think maybe she did want a glimpse. I could see the bright red blush peeking out from where her hands covered her eyes. She was so naïve; so pure it was painful.
“I… I didn’t know you were showering and I just came in to talk to you about what happened in the car, and oh my god, you just pulled the towel off.” The words rushed from her mouth, and I snickered out loud.
“What about what happened in the car?” I pulled out a pair of shorts, slipping them on so that she could uncover her face. One of these days very soon she would have to get used to seeing my cock out in the open because it would be more than just sitting here idly, doing nothing. Eventually it would be throbbing deep inside of her.
“I can’t…” More rushing of words. “We can’t I mean. We can’t do this. It’s wrong. It’s bad. It’s just not going to work, and I can’t handle heartbreak. Not on top of everything else that is going on in my life.” I walked over to her, pulling her hands away from her still covered face so I could see that beautiful blush and stare into those majestic hazel orbs.
“You’re thinking far too much into this,” I assured her, smoothing a hand down the side of her face. When she finally looked up at me, I couldn’t help but feel my heart soaring through the air. It was a strange feeling, almost like flying, the lightness that fills your belly as you jump into the air, knowing that nothing but gravity is going to bring you right back down to where it all started.
That feeling alone wrapped around me, forcing me to remember that you couldn’t rush something that you wanted to last forever.
“No, Royal, I’m not. I’m not ready for this… For you. You’re so intense. So dark, and so different than I ever expected.” She stopped, a frown forming on her face.
I didn’t know what to say to that, because it was all true.
“I’m not Sasha. I’m not experienced. I can’t handle all of this at once.” Panic pierced her words. I wanted to take those emotions from her and throw them away.
“You’re ready, and believe me I know you’re nothing like Sasha.” I sat down on the bed next to her, forcing her body into my own, my hands gliding up her body, stopping at her cheeks so that I could cup them in my hands. The warmth of her skin against my palm told me just how real all of this was between us.
“Fear is something expected when you’re walking blindly in the dark,” I continued.
“I’m not scared of you, Royal. I’m scared of this. I’m scared of what I feel for you and for the pleasure you’ve showed me.” She gestured to us, her eyes casting down in the direction of my chest as if she was ashamed to have admitted her feelings out loud.
“Only because you’ve never felt something like this before. Don’t push me away. Don’t stop this before it even has a chance to start. I’m consumed by you Noelle… Completely fucking owned by you. Something about you makes my heartbeat speed up, my palms sweat, and my cock swell.”
You would think my confessions wouldn’t be seen so much as a shock anymore, but the look on her face said she was still very much shocked. Clearly she wasn’t getting the picture, and I needed to reassure her of those feelings.
I grabbed her hand placing it against my still hard cock. She tried to pull away but I gripped her hand harder pushing it down against my throbbing cock.
“This is for you, baby— all of it— every single inch. You might not be ready today, tomorrow, or even next week, but I will get a taste of that sweet pussy of yours and I will fuck you, because I’ve never felt this way about anyone, not like how I feel about you.”
“Royal…” Realization hit her straight in the chest. She knew there was no running away from this. I wouldn’t let her; couldn’t let her. There was no way I would be able to handle the pain of losing her.
Once upon a time, I might have blamed her for what happened between my mother and father, but I was starting to realize she had nothing to do with it. She was merely a speck in the giant picture.
“I want you so fucking bad, so badly that it hurts to be away from you. I feel whole when I’m with you, like the missing piece to my puzzle is you; like you won’t ever judge me for being who I am. You understand the dark pieces of me, and you get the brokenness that swirls around inside of me. You get me when no one else does or ever has.”
“I…” She licked her lips. “I feel the same things. All of it, word for word. I just know there isn’t any real way this can work between us. I know when something is too good to be true. I know when to give up on the happily ever after, Royal.” It pained me to hear her say those words. She was ready to give up on her happily ever after, having just discovered everything I felt for her.
I placed a soft kiss against her forehead. I would do whatever I could to make sure this was okay for her. Even if we couldn’t have forever, we could have now, and that would just have to be enough for right now.
It would have to be.
“I’ll make sure it’s all okay…” I soothed her with a hand down her back. She buried her face in the crook of my neck, taking in deep breaths. She shuddered against me as she released the breath she had just taken in. We both jumped at the slamming of the front door, and it sounded as if the whole house shook with the force of it. I think we both knew right then and there that things were about change.
“NOELLE!!!” Her mother’s voice boomed up the stairs. You could hear the furious rage that lingered behind her words.
Yeah, shit was about to hit the fucking fan.
Chapter Eighteen
-Noelle
I cringed the moment her furious voice met my ears. I pulled away from Royal’s warm body, our eyes colliding and our bodies sagging against one another. We both knew what was coming. It was inevitable, like a twister barreling down the countryside. You couldn’t escape the mayhem it would cause.
“Don’t let her break you down, Noelle. Promise me you will give it right back to her, the same way you did to Sasha today. Promise me!” His voice was deeper, angrier, and darker than it had been previously.
I stood from the bed, straightening my shoulders. I could do this. I could face her down. There was nothing else left that she could say that would or could break me. She may be my mother, but that didn’t mean I had to let her scream at me or try and bring me down every chance that she got.
“If I have to come up there and get you, it won’t be good for you.” I could see the fire shooting from her mouth as she yelled up the stairway. I slipped an emotionless mask onto my face. I couldn’t let her beat me down to nothing, not again.
Not ever.
“I’m coming,” I shouted down the stairs making sure she could hear me. “However, I refuse to talk to you if you’re going to do nothing but scream at me or talk down to me,” I spoke trying to mask the slight twinge of fear that filled my belly as I descended the stairs, rounding the corner and taking notice of her displeased expression.
I could feel Royal right behind me, his front almost brushing against my back. His presence calmed me, saved me from the wicked witch below.
“Good, you brought the trouble maker with you as well.” Her eyes penetrated through him. The look of disgust for Royal was clear on her face.
“If by trouble maker you mean me, then yeah.” I could hear the humor in Royal’s words, my eyes not missing the wolfish grin he gave her. I needed to remind her just of who this conversation was about. She was always putting blame on others, blame where it didn’t deserve to be put.
“Royal has nothing to do with this. The fight was all me. I’m the one that didn’t just walk about. He only tried to stop me. You should be thanking him if anything.” I was certain she was blinded by her own personal rage toward him. She probably didn’t even hear a word I just said because she was too busy thinking about all the ways she could pin something on Royal, or find another reason I wasn’t good enough. My mother wanted me to be something that I wasn’t, and all I wanted was to be me. To be free like a sparrow soaring through the night sky.
“Royal has everything to do with this, and I don’t believe for a single damn second that he was trying to put an end to any fight. Fighting is all the punk knows how to do.” Pure hatred dripped from her words. The hate she had for Royal pissed me off more than the way she looked, acted, and treated me.
“No…” I pushed further in front of him, stepping into my mother’s face, and blocking his view of her, or what I could of it.
I couldn’t listen to her put blame on him anymore, not when her beef was with me. I was no longer the perfect child she wanted, and that had nothing to do with Royal. It had everything to do with me.
“Yes, Noelle. You’re blinded by his charm, but no worries, sweetie, because I can see him for the worthless piece of shit he is…” She was like a snake slithering through the grass, waiting to strike her victim blindly. “It’s really no wonder Mark left his mother for me.” There it was, the strike, the venom sinking into Royal’s body. I couldn’t do anything to stop him as he pushed past me and got straight into my mother’s face.
“You don’t get to talk about me or my mother.” The Royal I grew to know was gone, and in his place was a much meaner, darker man. His fists were clenched so tightly at his sides that the veins in his arms bulged. He was holding himself back, but why?
To protect you.
“It’s the truth, Royal. Have you ever asked your father why he is with me and not your mother?” My mother baited him. Did I want Royal to lay her out?
“That’s enough, Viviana, he doesn’t know the whole truth yet and you have no fucking right speaking to my son the way you are. You are doing nothing but trying to instigate a fight.” Mark’s voice forced all of us to swing our attention to him, still Royal didn’t care if his father heard what he had to say.
“I don’t give a fuck what you think you have that my mother doesn’t, didn’t, or whatever...” he seethed. Viviana knew exactly what wounds were fresh on him, and she did whatever she could to sink her teeth into them. Maybe that very thought was what made me stop her from her assault against him or maybe I finally realized that I actually cared about Royal on a deeper level than I previously thought.
“You got what you wanted seventeen years ago, Viv. I’m here with you and Noelle, but the next time I hear you speak to either of my children the way you just did I will take them both and leave you here.” It was Mark’s turn to lose his temper now, and in all the years I knew him I couldn’t think of one time I have ever seen him so angry over something, and especially not toward my mother.
Despite the fact that my mom deserved all the anger directed at her I knew I had to get Royal out of here before the shit storm got deeper.
“Enough!” I screamed at all three of them, feeling as deflated as a balloon. Royal didn’t even glance at me as I pulled him away from my mother and his father. The look of pure satisfaction that lingered on my mother’s face said she thought won this argument, even though Royal’s father came in and forced her to shut her yap.
“Hitting him where it hurts most isn’t okay, for fuck’s sakes he’s your stepson. Your husband’s child, and all you can seem to think about is throwing him under the bus and degrading him until he loses his shit with you. I mean, what kind of grown-ass woman treats a person that way?” I had to question her, because the question itself was burning a hole in my head. The fire that Royal sparked months ago was threatening to overtake me.
“Do you not see that this isn’t about him, but about the fact that you’re so fucking hard on me? You want me to be someone I’m not, and Royal being here threatens that precious hold you have on me.” I ran a hand through my hair in frustration and continued on with what I was saying. I needed to get it all out in the open and finally say everything that I have been holding in for the past couple of years.
“If you want to be mad at someone, make it me. If you want to hurt someone, lash out at me. But do not hurt Royal for bringing something to the surface that was already there. I’ve hated you for a very long time, he just helped me become more aware of it.” I could feel a shift in the air as I spoke. If you lit a match, everything within ten feet would blow up. I focused my attention on my mother, watching as her face contorted in anger, her cheeks growing red with embarrassment.
“You’re an ungrateful little bitch!” she growled, her hand reaching out and yanking on a few loose strands of my hair. I didn’t even have a chance to react because Mark stepped in.
“Let go of her right now!” Mark shouted, his large hand wrapping around her body in a firm grip, forcing her to release her hold on my hair. Royal took that moment to grab me, forcing my body behind his so he could get in my mother’s face.
“It’s you, that’s ungrateful,” Royal spat. My chest ached as I watched the raging inferno that was his emotions take hold.
“It’s you that will pay for hurting all those that I love.” The bleak look in his eyes scared me. “It’s you that’s wrong,” he growled, a rumbling forming in his chest.
My mother’s expression morphed into fear. She was afraid of him, and for some reason that made me happy.
“You will be going back to your whore of a mother. I refuse to allow a pathetic criminal like you to continue to stay in this house and around my daughter!” I couldn’t move, the air in my chest stilled as I waited for Royal’s response. Mark rolled his eyes, as if he was done with her shit a long time ago.
It was then that the words Mark spoke just minutes ago hit me.
You got what you wanted seventeen years ago…
It all made sense now, the reason why Royal hated me in the beginning had nothing to do with me as a person but more so what he thought I had caused. He thought I was the reason his parents were no longer married. The reason his dad left and he never had a father figure in his life.
“Good! Do it, because mark my words, Viviana, I will find a way back here. You’re nothing to my father. I’m his son, and I can easily have you replaced. In fact, I will have you replaced.” I’ve heard so much hate being spoken by a person. The anger and rage that was fueling inside of him terrified me. He didn’t just hate my mom, he completely despised her.
“If that were the case your father wouldn’t have left you or your mother all those years ago. Truthfully he doesn’t give a shit about you, or haven’t you realized that yet,” my mother mocked.
“Viv, that’s uncalled for. You know for certain that I tried for many years to contact him.” I could see the anxiety in Mark’s features, but it was too late. Viviana landed the last and final blow to Royal. I couldn’t blame him for wanting to walk away forever.
Royal looked as if he could murder someone as he whipped around, his body shoving past me. My mother’s words caused even more rage to radiate from him; his shoulder slammed into mine, allowing a spark of energy to transfer between us. It was a shock of heat, and flames of fire flickered in his darkened eyes.
“Is this what you wanted, Noelle?” my mother questioned me as the sound of Royal walking away echoed loudly in my ears. I had to remind myself that it wasn’t me he was walking away from, but my mother.
“What I wanted and what you got are two very different things. Hurting Royal, me, even Mark won’t make you feel any better in the long run, and I know you might be pretty on the outside but you’re nothing but a cold, desolate, heartless person on the inside. You’ll end up completely alone and miserable if you keep carrying on with your life like this.”
The fight that was in me was fading. I couldn’t keep going on and on with her about these things. It was pointless. All she ever spoke of was lies. Lies she told just to make herself feel better and tear other people down. All she was good at was spewing hate and demanding perfection from everyone around her. The person she expected me to be and the person I wanted to be were just not the same people, and I was done trying to please her, trying to be what she wanted.
“He will do nothing but hurt you. Break you down, Noelle. I know the type of person he is. He’s violent,” she cried as Mark held her in place. There was a change to her voice, almost a sound of utter defeat.
I shook my head laughing as I started to walk away.
“Are you insane, Mom? That is all you have done to me my entire life. It isn’t Royal that hurts me or tries to break me down; it’s you!” I yelled but kept going.
“Royal makes me feel accepted, like the person I am is all I ever need to be. He makes me feel whole for the first time in my life,” I said and for the first time I realize how absolutely true those words were.
Royal makes me whole.
“You’re making the biggest mistake of your life following that boy. Look at what he just did to me?” She was playing the victim, and it didn’t sit well with me.
“That’s just it. You’re delusional if you think it was Royal that was in the wrong here. All Royal did was give back exactly what you dished out! Just because you think you’re better than him, or better than even me doesn’t mean that it’s more right for you to do something. Look at yourself! Take a long look in the mirror before you start passing judgement around like it’s a dish to be served at dinner.” I turned on her, taking notice of the pity tears that started to fall from her eyes. I couldn’t look or feel an ounce of pity for her. Not when she brought all of this on herself.
“Everything would be better off without you around, since none of us live up to your expectations anyway. Why don’t you just leave? Forget about all of us and go find that perfect life you so badly want.”
She sniffled, pretending even further that she was hurt by the things we said.
“I should have aborted you like your father had told me to. My life would have been so much better if I hadn’t been stuck with your ungrateful ass.” I realized as soon as she spoke such hateful things to me that I should’ve been reeling with anger. That I should have been hurting. Crying even.
Her words should have stung at the very fucking least, but they didn’t. I knew that if a mother could feel that way about their child then they didn’t deserve to have them.
“Maybe you should have then.” I swallowed around the lump that had formed in my throat and the achiness that consumed the muscles in my chest. I wasn’t so much hurt at the thought of losing Viviana as I was with the realization that she never actually cared about me. She never actually loved me.
I just lost my mother. To me she would always be dead. From this point on I was an orphan. Sure I had Mark who I always thought of as a father, but in reality he didn’t owe me anything. He could up and leave me at any point and time and then I truly would be all alone.
I needed space away from it all, away from my mother and Mark. Away from the lies that seemed to be mounting. Each step I took away from them and up the stairs was a reminder that things had now changed. There was nothing else that needed to be said.
It was in these moments I realized what it must have been like for Royal growing up, and how that pain molded him into the man he was today.