Rushed (The Rushed Series) (28 page)

When it was over, we leaned our foreheads together and panted, trying to catch our breath as its white mist gave us away in the dark.

"Wow! Just wow." I unlocked my legs from his waist and dropped my feet toward the ground.

"'Wow' doesn't even come close." He slid out of me and set me down, letting my T-shirt and jacket slide back into place.
 

As we zipped our jeans, I noticed the raw back of his hand. "You're bleeding!" I took it in mine. "The bricks scraped you up. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't even notice." He stared at his hand, where the blood looked black in the dark. "I didn't feel a thing." He grinned. "Until you mentioned it. Now it stings. Thanks a lot, pledge." He sucked on the back of it and wiped it on his jeans. "Totally worth it. Best way to get scraped hands ever."

I took his hand in mine. "You shouldn't have done that. Blood doesn't come out."

"Maybe I don't want it to." His voice was husky. "Maybe I want permanent proof I bled for you."
 

When he released me, I pulled a tissue from my jacket pocket and pressed it against the scratches. "Up against the rough grain of a brick wall—think that will ever make it in a porn movie?"

"In an alley behind a frat house? Probably not." He kissed me and took my hand as we walked out of the alley.

Out on the sidewalk, where we could be seen, he let it go and shoved his hands in his sweatshirt pockets.

"Why did you stop?" I had to know. "Did I say the right thing?"

"You made all the right points. That's not why. I couldn't walk away from you." His voice broke with emotion. "I'm a fool for you, pledge. It's going to kill me watching you pretend to be Dakota's."

I hesitated, but I had to ask. "If you ever want to talk about…the accident, or your sister, I'm here. I won't judge."

He was silent a moment, like he was thinking. "Dak told you I was three? That they found me in the driver's seat pulling the handbrake?" he said.

I nodded. "Yeah. Trying to save her."

He took a deep breath. "And all I remember are sirens and being in big trouble?"

I nodded again.

"Then you know everything I do. My memories of it are like snatches of a nightmare. Disjointed and unreal. With too many gaps to fill in. If I hadn't seen my sister's grave and lived with the fallout it did to our family, I might have gotten away with thinking I'd imagined the whole thing. I might have even forgotten it altogether. How many things do you remember from when you were three?"

I frowned, thinking. "Not much."

"Neither do I." His fists bulged in his sweatshirt pockets, like he wanted to punch something. "But my parents have never forgotten. Or forgiven."
 

"That's really why you almost killed yourself that day in the woods, isn't it?" I blinked back tears. The whole thing was so tragic. How could his parents not love him? Why didn't they hurt for him the way I did? The story would have made me cry even if I didn't know and love Zach.

He looked at me without blinking. "I was tired of fighting with my parents and hoping they would eventually give a shit about me. I wanted to give up."

"They don't matter." I felt fierce. "You have me now." I grabbed his arm. "You promised, remember? You won't ever try that again."

He looked off into the distance. "I promised I would fight the urge. Sometimes, though, I think if I sacrificed my life for someone else's it would make everything right."
 

I stared at him, terrified.

He grinned. "Don't worry. Life doesn't give many people a chance to be a hero. Let's go home."

Em got back late, glowing. I was at my desk, studying for a lab exam.
 

"Whoa!" she said. "Aren't you the studious one! The girl who screwed the frat president in wall-pounding fury heads back early to study? Weird. You were like Cinderella ditching the party so early." She tossed me my water bottle. "You even left this behind. What's the scoop with you?"

"I'm trying to make the dean's list." I grinned, but I was glowing, too, with the memory of Zach. The sex had been hot, but the intimacy we shared went deeper. He trusted me with his secrets now.

"Shut up!" She studied me. "Are you and Dakota an item now?"

"Maybe," I said. "You and Carter?"

She flashed me a sly grin, looking like I'd convinced her. "Definitely. I want all the details."

"You already heard all the details." I closed the notes I was studying. "Tell me about Carter."

Zach

I spent Thursday morning when I wasn't in class or working looking for a new job and place to live. Anything to get Alexis out of this decoy relationship. There was nothing. Probably would be nothing until semester. I would keep looking and hope to get lucky.

Thursday afternoon was lingerie football practice. The first day Dak and Alexis would be full out faking their relationship. There were two things I couldn't stay away from—Alexis and football. Combining them would have been like making a peanut butter cup out of chocolate and peanut butter. Great on their own. Combined, best thing ever. Except for Dak. Throw him into the mix hitting on Alexis, real or faked, and the whole sweet thing went sour. There was no way I was missing that practice.

Since last night, I'd been thinking about what Alexis had said about forgiving Dak. She was right. How did I expect to be forgiven if I refused to forgive someone else? Holding on to anger and blame had destroyed my family and the best friendship I'd ever had. The problem was me. I was going to have to forgive myself and come clean.
 

Alexis' love made it seem worth the effort. My life was coming into focus, becoming more and more worth living. Letting go of an old grudge was another step forward.

I walked with a group of girls from the house to the practice field, happy and tormented at the same time. I couldn't get last night in the alley out of my mind. My story about how I scratched my hand was lame. But no one had seen through it yet.

It was hell acting like Alexis was nothing special to me. Leaving her to walk in the middle of her group of friends and not come up beside her and put my arm around her like she was mine. She sparkled and laughed, totally gorgeous. I fought to keep my eyes off her.

I'd had a lifetime of practice holding my emotions in, but this was the hardest it had ever been. I nodded to her and her roommate Emily. They walked in a clump with the other live-in pledges, Laurel, Sarah, and Katie. They were dressed nearly identically in sports bras, Double Deltsie T-shirts, and short running shorts. It was a muggy afternoon. Rain threatened, but nothing could dampen my spirits. Not after last night. Some of the girls grumbled, not wanting to get messed up. Alexis shone with the excitement of going to play.

Walking in the middle of the hottest sorority girls on campus made me the envy of every guy we passed. If only they knew. The hottest one was my girl and I couldn't admit to it.

Morgan fell in step with me. She was just as blond, thin, and put together as the others. So much so, she was what I called a sorority clone. Where was the real Morgan? She would have been as pretty as the rest of the girls if she would let go of her pettiness and insecurity. "Guess you heard about the big function at the Tau Psis last night?"
 

I shrugged. "Think so? Why? I don't give a damn what the frat guys do."

"But you hear the gossip." Her perfect pink, glossed lips twisted into a smug smile. She was enjoying this way too much.

I wished I could tell her how unattractive it made her. I caught a whiff of her perfume on the breeze, and an image of Alexis with her legs locked around me came out of nowhere. Crap. Morgan was wearing Alexis' brand of perfume. On purpose. Real subtle. Was she trying to kill my desire for it or entice me with it?

"Why don't you just tell me what you want me to know?" I said, knowing what it was and wishing Morgan would get over this misguided crush she'd had on me since freshman year.

"You're baiting me!" She laughed too brightly, like she was trying too hard. "Don't tell me you haven't heard the rumors about Dakota Bradley banging Alexis so hard they broke his bed. The little freshman is getting a real reputation." She shot a sideways look at Alexis's group, speaking loud enough for Alexis to overhear her condescending tone. "Someone should warn her that reaching too high could come back to bite her."

"Sounds like the job for a big," I said, trying not to clench my teeth.

Morgan ignored my comment. "No wonder Dakota made her captain. I knew right away he was playing favorites. He wanted in her pants." Though Morgan acted nonchalant, she was studying me for my reaction to this salacious news.

I knew what she was looking for and was damned if I would give it to her. I shrugged like that shit didn't matter to me. "Rough sex is his business. Does it surprise you? You saw him tackle her last practice. He likes it hard." I paused for a beat. "But making her QB was just smart game. He'd have been an idiot not to. She's the best player in the house."

I hoped that would shut Morgan up. Most of the girls in the house, including Morgan, knew about the rivalry and past friendship between Dakota and me. She was the main threat in the house to Alexis and me. I let Morgan have this victory, hoping it threw her off our scent. She'd been suspicious and jealous of us since recruitment week. Why Morgan thought putting Alexis out of reach would make me suddenly turn to her after she'd had a two-year head start and hadn't caught me yet, I had no idea.
 

Morgan was undaunted by my rebuff. "She changed her social media status to 'in a relationship.'" Morgan sounded so happy she might as well have sung the announcement. "She pinned a selfie of her and Dakota at the top of her page."

"Hope she's not heartbroken when she realizes it was a one-night stand and she's just another notch on his bedpost," I said. "We all know QB2 likes to play the field."

Morgan passed from happy to downright ebullient. I saw myself mirrored in her, the ugly glee I felt when bad shit happened to Dak. My gut turned over. I made myself sick. This had to end.

Sarah came up beside us. I didn't know if she'd had enough and was coming to the rescue or not. I didn't care. I was happy to have her there.

"Hey, Zach! Are you going to stay and give us pointers this practice? We could use your help. You know more about football than all the Tau Psis put together.
Including
Dakota." Sarah's smile was deceptively sunny and innocent. I had no doubt she knew what she was doing.

Ah, shit
, I thought. Interfering with Dak's gig was the last thing I wanted to do.

Sarah's suggestion caught Kelly's attention. "That's right! You played high school football, didn't you?"
 

Sarah answered for me. "Played football? Are you kidding? He was the starting quarterback the year our high school team took 4A state! Dakota was just his backup."

I tried not to wince. Dak would hate being called "just backup."

"I had no idea you were so good, Zach." Kelly looked at me with new admiration. Sometimes the girls didn't see past the houseboy image unless pushed to remember I had another life outside the house. "You didn't get recruited and get an athletic scholarship?"

I shrugged. "Not to one of the big schools I wanted to go to. To little schools in the lower divisions." That didn't offer scholarships big enough that allowed me to even come close to paying for tuition and board.

"You gave up football to come be our houseboy! Awesome. We love you, Zach." From anyone but Kelly, that would have sounded snarky and snotty. But she was genuine.

"So?" Sarah said. "Are you going to coach? Houseboys can coach, can't they? There's no rule against it. You're one of us."

Beside her, Alexis remained quiet. But she shot me an encouraging glance on the sly.

I appreciated the girls thinking I was one of them. Not a girl. A member of the family. But this wasn't my gig.
 

"Please, Zach!" Sarah said.

A chorus of girls joined her. "Please, Zach! Please, please!"

"It's Dakota's team," I said, evading them. "His call."

"It's our team, too," Kelly said. "I'm house president, just like he is. I can tell him we want you as part of our team."

Crap. I could imagine how being commanded to let me coach was going to go over with Dak. "Let me handle it, okay?"