Safe Landing (13 page)

“Let me see, Tenderloin, isn’t it?” Hank’s thin lipped sneer made me want to throw my hot coffee in his face. How was I going to be able to stomach this? I smiled weakly pretending to be amused, but truthfully, I was swallowing back the bitter taste rising in my throat.

Hank glanced at the door.  “Shit, this is getting good. Here comes Dracula’s punk-ass girlfriend.”

Gina strolled into the café with the Mohawk duo. She was wearing a skin-tight green dress and enough mascara to keep Max Factor in limos for a year.

Hank leaned his inflated head next to mine. “I love chick fights.” He smelled like pot and stale beer. I held my breath and squeezed my eyes shut. Please, anyone but him.

Gina scooted into a chair and table in front of the tiny stage. Seth glanced down at her but saved his smile. I was searching desperately for another place to sit. At this point, it was standing room only and even that was scarce. I spotted a vacancy on the wall between the restrooms. The day’s rating was quickly sinking to a two. Plucking up my mug, I dashed for the empty space.

“Where you goin’ sweetheart?” Hank called to my back. Seth was singing
Knocking on Heaven’s Door
, and the idiot’s voice interrupted the music. I pressed against the cold plaster of the wall and glanced at the stage. “Don’t be like that, Tenderloin!”

Seth held up his hand and the band stopped. They stared at Hank and his friends. Then the entire audience turned around to shoot them a collective scowl. The jerks looked embarrassed.

Hank stood, obviously hoping his hulking physique would scare off some of the angry stares. “What the fuck are you all looking at?”

The patrons stayed brave and steadfast behind their steaming mugs of mocha and caramel cappuccinos. Hank had wandered into the wrong place. He kicked his chair and it toppled backward with a crash. The other goofballs followed their leader in disgrace out of the shop. Seth’s band started up again.

As I watched the whole event, I could not suppress a smile. Suddenly, I felt someone staring at me from across the room. It was Gina. She usually wore this sort of dramatically sweet look on her small face, but at the moment, she appeared tense. I smiled at her, but there was no smile in return. She ripped her gaze from me and returned her attention to Seth. I seriously contemplated calling my mom to pick me up. Somehow I did not figure that crawling into Seth’s car for a ride home was going to sit well with Gina.

Now the Mohawk twins were trying to be inconspicuous as they twisted casually in their chairs to see me. A black and pink row of spikes on one’s head made fading into the crowd a bit difficult. It was almost laughable. Here I was bracing myself against a wall, where I had the unfortunate luxury of breathing in whiffs of bathroom air from both sides, and Sid Vicious wannabes were shooting surreptitious glances at me through the crowd. I flipped open my cell phone and pressed one for Mom.

“Are you O.K, Brazil?” Mom asked anxiously.

“I’m fine. I know it’s late, Mom, but could you come pick me up at the coffee house on Benson Ave?”

“I’ll be right there, but stay inside until I get there.” Mom was a super-duper worrywart. But since I had friends whose moms never seemed to give a damn where they were, I decided I would gladly have the opposite side of the concerned mom spectrum.

After a few minutes, Seth and his band stopped for a break. He jumped off the stage and stopped at Gina’s table. It was hard to read his expression but overjoyed was not a word that came to mind. I saw some headlights that looked like Mom’s pull into the parking lot. As I scooted through the maze of tables and chairs, I waved to Seth. He seemed puzzled at first, but then he gave me a half smile and waved back. Even his half smile was to die for.

My mom was good about respecting my privacy. She trusted me for the most part and usually tried not to pry unless she thought it was necessary. “You alright?” she asked. Her face looked freshly washed as if she was already headed to bed.

“Seth’s girlfriend showed up unexpectedly. I thought it would be better if I found my own way home.”

“He has a girlfriend? Too bad. He’s cute and so nice.”

I shrugged and switched the radio to my station. “Story of my life.” 

By the time I’d washed off my make-up and brushed my teeth, my head was hurting with the memory of the night. I’d momentarily convinced myself that I had a chance with Seth, but Gina had tight reins on him and I didn’t feel like getting into the middle of that. Something told me she could be a hostile bitch if someone went after Seth. Now I had told Sebastian I would help him, but on the drive home, I’d convinced myself there was no way in hell I could cozy up to Hank.

I dove under my covers hoping ridiculously that Sebastian hadn’t realized I was home yet. I didn’t feel like talking to him tonight. I still had to work up the courage to tell him that I was a selfish chicken shit.

From the foot of my bed, I grabbed the stuffed hippopotamus Dad had given me on my tenth birthday and hugged it to me. Moonlight filtered through my window panes, and the entire room was cast in long shadows. Sebastian was there sitting on my computer desk reading his own letter.

“I remember painting these black roses. The pain in my head that day had been overwhelming, as if someone had driven a railroad stake through my skull.”

I clutched the hippo tighter. It smelled faintly of dust and menthol. The toy had always comforted me when I was sick in bed and Mom had rubbed that greasy stuff on my chest. “I- I don’t think I can help you, Sebastian.” The stillness in the house muffled the sound of my voice. “Warner is a horrible puke of a guy. I don’t want anything to do with him.”

The letter floated to the ground like a leaf from a tree. “I understand. Perhaps it’s better that I don’t know anyhow. What if Emily had truly not loved me anymore? I don’t think I could bear knowing that.”

I sat up but held tightly to the hippo. “She loved you, Sebastian. How could she not? What girl does not dream about having a guy hopelessly in love with her?”

“I was not good enough for her. I didn’t deserve her.”

“Baloney.” Suddenly I was playing psychologist to a ghost. “She didn’t deserve you.”

My mom poked her head in. Sebastian faded out of view. “I thought I heard you talking to someone?”

“I was on the phone to Jenny,” I lied.

She nodded. “I’m glad you two are talking again.” The door closed and Sebastian reappeared in front of it.

“I’m going to find that diary and prove to you she loved you,” I whispered so Mom wouldn’t hear. I don’t know if my sudden resolve was to help Sebastian or to prove to myself that true love really did exist, but I was going to swallow back the puke that kept oozing into my throat and flirt with Hank.

Chapter 12

I chose a low-cut, pink tank top and skinny jeans for my Operation get Emily’s Diary scheme. My mind had played and replayed scenarios the rest of the weekend. I would smile and be nice to Hank, all the while trying not to throw up my breakfast on his shoes. I just needed one invitation to his house. Sebastian had told me about the loose floor board in the closet beneath the stairs where Emily had hidden her diary. Of course if the floor had been removed or replaced then the diary was most likely gone. Sebastian knew that Emily had left town suddenly. Still she may very well have taken it with her. But as least I would have tried and maybe that would be enough to put Sebastian’s soul to rest. Of course this would completely destroy any chance I might ever have had with Seth, but I’d convinced myself that Gina was never going to let him go anyhow. Couldn’t really blame her. I don’t think I’d give up a guy like Seth without putting up a serious fight.

Mom was listening to her political talk radio show in the car while I went over the steps of the plan in my mind. My phone vibrated. “Who would call me so early? I need a new phone, Mom. One without teeth marks. I can’t even text anymore.”

She smiled. “We’ll get a new one with my next check.”

“Hello.”

“Hey Zilly, it’s Dad.”

I glanced at my mom’s profile. “Hi, Dad. What’s up? Did you have a nice visit with Cynthia’s parents?” Mom knew I was watching her. She froze her face into a noncommittal half grin like she had no interest in our conversation, but her head inched a tiny bit closer to me.

“It was very nice.”

That was a terrifically bland answer.

“I was thinking we could go car shopping next weekend. I could pick you up on Saturday. I have no flights , so my calendar is clear.”

“I don’t know, Dad. I’ve got this junior year party to go to Saturday.” I hadn’t planned to go since I barely knew anyone, but I figured it was my best opportunity to make nice-nice with Hank.

“I’ll pick you up Sunday morning then. We can shop around Pelican Bay.”

He must have been feeling extra guilty to give up his Sunday with Cynthia. A car would be great though. “Sounds good, Dad. See you Sunday. Safe landing.” Mom’s eyes hadn’t strayed from the road but her ears were nearly twitching to hear everything.

I snapped the phone shut. “We’re going car shopping this Sunday.”

Mom nodded. “Glad he’s not breaking
that
promise.”

There was a million ways I could interpret that but I chose not to. I already had a million other thoughts running through my head.

I strutted through the doors to the school. My pink tank top got more attention than I’d expected. But my apelike target was nowhere in sight. Neither was Seth. I hadn’t talked to him since the coffee shop disaster.

It seemed I really did need to start a weirdness rating for my days because this day was going to need it. As I neared my locker, my well-thought out plans were obliterated.

Gina was leaning against the lockers talking with none other than Hank. She kept smiling up at him and pushing her boobs out. He was totally into her. I glanced around but didn’t see Seth. A girl would have to be an idiot to give up someone like Seth for Hank.  And to flirt with Seth’s biggest enemy, she was either a major witch or an imbecile. In Gina’s case, I decided it was some of both. Their nearly intertwined legs blocked my locker. I cleared my throat loudly, but they ignored me.

“Excuse me, but I need to get into my locker,” I said.

Hank glanced down at me over his shoulder. “I guess you’ll have to wait then, bitch.”

That was all I needed to hear. My scheme to attract him melted beneath my fury. “Listen, you brainless lump of shit, move, so I can get into my locker.” His face bloated up into a big red balloon. I took a step back and smacked into someone standing behind me. Gina’s eyes widened but it didn’t seem to have anything to do with me being close to having my head ripped off.

“What the hell is going on?” Seth’s voice was low.

I turned and our eyes locked for a minute. Then I remembered I was sandwiched between him and a huge caveman with a red face and balled fists who I had just referred to as a lump of shit. I squeezed out of my spot and stepped back. Seth’s chest heaved up and down as he glared at Gina. She sort of shrank down beneath all her heavy make-up. Seth looked totally pissed, which meant that he was really jealous, which meant that he really liked Gina, which actually made a heavy lump form in my stomach. Perfect.

Seth and Hank were doing that blown-up chest, arms out to the side kind of dance that guys do when they’re waiting for the first fist to fly.

Seth brought his face up to Hank’s. A crowd began to form around us. The only good thing about a crowd was that it was a sure way to alert teachers. Either I didn’t want to see Seth get hurt or I didn’t want to see him fight over Gina. I looked around past the bobbing heads of the spectators. The teachers were apparently still hovering around the microwave in the lounge waiting for their coffees to heat because no adults surfaced. 

Gina had this twinkle in her eyes as if she’d plotted all this, and it was turning out just the way she’d wanted. Hank’s massive arm shot out and his fist plowed into Seth’s stomach. Seth stumbled backward into some onlookers. They caught him and propped him back onto his feet. He flew forward and threw his fist into Hank’s smirking face just as the vice principal blew his whistle. “Warner, Dallas, to my office!”

Gina reached for Seth’s arm but he wrenched it away. There was a twinkle of evil under all her makeup. Seth spun around and walked toward me. Roughly, he grabbed hold of my arms and pulled me toward him. His mouth slammed over mine. He kissed me hard then released me.

Confusion must have shown in my face as if WTF had been etched into my forehead. His dark, angry gaze held mine for a minute, then he stalked off toward the vice principal’s office.

Everyone was staring at me, especially Gina. It was not exactly what I had dreamt about when I imagined Seth kissing me. The last thing I wanted was to be used as a stooge to make Gina jealous. Did I just happen to be the closest pair of available lips or had he really wanted to kiss me? The whole thing was a shitty deal, and I wanted no part of the little drama. I turned to leave and my knees wobbled. Stupid fucking kiss.

I didn’t know too many people yet, which was sort of the social life I’d been striving for, but I heard enough from my few acquaintances to know that Seth and Hank were suspended for the rest of the week. Big rumors began about how Seth was so crazy about Gina he’d punched a guy just for looking at her and then turned around and used some girl to make Gina jealous. The story grew closer and closer to a teen movie script with each retell. I was ready to slam my head against the nearest wall when, during Chemistry, Julie whispered to me that she’d heard Seth was ready to kill himself if Gina left him. That’s when I decided Gina must have been circulating her own fictitious version of the story. The way Seth had wrenched his arm from her grasp did not really jive with that desperately in love scenario. Anyone with half a brain could see that Gina was messing with Seth’s head. Why—I couldn’t say but then nothing seemed too secure or logical about Gina.