Saint And Sinners (8 page)

“How will we handle events and meetings?” another Knight asked.

“Great question.” Saint pulled out his chair and finally took a seat. He fastened
his hands together, and looked briefly down at the table. “Depending on the importance
level of the assembly, we will determine if it requires flight plans. If so, then
the New York or L.A. location will be chosen for said meeting based on factors that
pertain to its specific purpose. However, most meetings will be conducted via teleconference.
That way, we can all still see each other and communicate as we normally would. Now,
at the beginning of this, I brought up Jagger and Lawrence, and I did so for a reason.
I’m taking them with me.”

Lawrence’s eyes bulged while Jagger slumped in his chair, threw his head back and
murmured, “Jesus Christ…” as he slapped the table in front of him with both hands.

“I’m sorry that you two had to find out this way, but with your specialized expertise,”
Saint gave them a knowing nod, “it
has
to happen. So, I retract, well,
retract
isn’t the right word…” He tossed the two men a slight grin. “I
rephrase
what I said previously. Everyone has a choice in staying or going, with the exception
of Jagger and Lawrence.” There was a light chuckle. Jagger glared around the room
angrily, trying to find the source of it as he sat straight as a fireplace poker,
muscling up with anxiety and anger.

“Alright.” Saint placed his hands flat on the table. “I have nothing further to share
at this time. If any of you have any additional questions, feel free to stop by my
office or email or call me. Lawrence and Jagger, please stay seated. The rest of you
are free to go.”

As if a school bell had rung, the shuffling of chairs and grumbling voices ensued.
After a minute or two, the room was cleared…minus Jagger whose chest huffed and puffed
as if a blood pressure band was wrapped around his waist. And Lawrence, who looked
as if he wanted to psychically slap the taste buds off Saint’s mouth.

“What…the…fuck…is going
on
!” Jagger roared once the coast was clear.

“I told you.” Saint’s eyes hooded as he leaned far back in his seat and folded his
hands atop his head, clearly not giving a flying fuck at the hostility being cast
his way. “I already explained that, man. Weren’t you paying attention?”

“Don’t play with me, goddamn it! You’re messing with my life.” Jagger slammed his
large fist onto the table, causing the water pitchers to shake, rattle and almost
roll. “I asked you two days ago what this damn meeting was about and you blocked my
ass. I couldn’t read you. You told me to wait, just sit tight and not worry. I should’ve
known you were up to something. What am I going to tell Traci, huh?”

“Alright Jagger, you don’t have to come with me,” Saint uttered, not having the heart
to argue right then and there. For some strange reason, he thought maybe Jagger would
have been eager for such a venture. The man clung to his New York tales with bated
breath, and the man said he’d enjoyed his trip with him and his family, when they
travelled for the healing of his father. Since Jagger had a strong taste for fucking
up shit, New York could be his virtual playground. But he rejected the notion before
the words were even fully formed.

“That’s crap, and you know it!” Jagger pointed at him, growing angrier the calmer
Saint became. “You know if you need me, I won’t let you down, I won’t stay here. If
it were just me, I’d pack my shit, no questions asked, but I have a wife now, man!
Jesus!” Jagger ran his hands down his face then keeled over, his head hitting the
table in psychological defeat.

Lawrence took a quiet sip of his water then caught Saint’s eye. Saint didn’t like
his expression. A slow, smoldering anger was building. Lawrence was like a silent
viper. You never saw him coming, but once he was upon you, it would be too late. He’d
wrap his psychic wares around your temple and squeeze your guts out until he had his
fill… The quiet ones…gotta watch them….

“What is it? Just spit it out, Lawrence,” Saint demanded, growing weary of the daggers
being tossed in his general direction.

“I do not appreciate how you handled this.” Lawrence briefly looked away from him
and lazily circled the rim of his drinking glass with the tip of his right index finger.
“You could have told us
before
this meeting.”

“No, I couldn’t have, Lawrence. I know how you two are, and I know how it would have
gone down…and you both are just pissed that I didn’t give you the opportunity to talk
me out of it.” No one responded. The two men simply stared at him.

“You and Jagger would have tried to change my mind, and not given me the chance to
even explain what the hell is going on.”

“What’s going on, Saint?” Lawrence asked calmly, a slight smirk on his tanned face
as he continued to trace the top of the glass, an uncomfortable arrogance in his tone.

“Fuck if I know…”

Lawrence chuckled lightly…but the man clearly wasn’t amused.

“Let me ask you something, man.” Saint glared at him as he tempered his tone, and
reclaimed his attention.

Lawrence immediately stopped what he was doing and glowered at Saint, ready to fight.

“Do you think I just woke up one day, shit, this morning even, and said, ‘Let me see
how I can mess up two out of my three best friends’ lives?’ Huh?! ‘What the
fuck
can I do, as their boss and friend’,” he pointed both index fingers at himself as
he continued to speak, “‘to make them hate my fucking guts?!’ Hmmm? ‘What can
I
do to make Donna want to take off her damn shoe and hurl it at my goddamn head?’
’Cause I
really
enjoy making trouble, yeah, that’s me! The man that goes around fuckin’ wit’ people
for the simple hell of it!” He ran his tongue over his upper teeth, sucking hard.
“Donna… of all people! Give her yet
another
reason to act a damn fool towards me? No thanks!” Now, Saint was angry, too.

“And Jagger, I love Traci, like she is my own damn sister. I meant every word I said
at your wedding. You know this shit! I know she has a good job here. I know this is
the only place she has lived in. You two are newlyweds, you have no children yet,
so the transition should be easier, or so I thought. Lawrence and I will have the
most problems, yet you are acting the angriest!”

“I have a right to feel and act however the
fuck
I want to,” Jagger retorted, the big man chewing his bottom lip like gooey taffy.
“You dropped this damn bomb on us, and all because you miss being around muggers and
criminals.”

“Muggers
are
criminals…just say criminals. Let’s not be redundant.” Saint smirked.

“Fuck you and that bullshit you rode in on…asshole.” Jagger turned away, clearly revolted.

Nevertheless, it didn’t sway Saint. He stayed the course.

“Look, I’m sorry you feel that way about New York, Jagger.” He took a deep breath.
“That isn’t what I miss.” Saint sighed, his jaw tightening as the pressure mounted.
He picked up an ink pen and twirled it around in his hand like a helicopter propeller
as he simmered in his thoughts. “I miss the whole damn vibe. I can’t get that anywhere
else. I’m admitting that, but there’s more to this. I have to do what is best for
my family, this organization and myself.” He tossed the ink pen down and pointed at
his chest. “Since I’m not happy, and I’m strugglin’, it would eventually affect my
family and this organization. Matter of fact, it already has! I am more withdrawn;
you know that’s not like me! When have you known me to be quiet?”

“I wish you’d be quiet right now.” Jagger kept his gaze averted, brooding, and his
back arched upward like a cat’s.

“Fine, Jagger. Fine, okay? Keep your ass here, seriously!” Saint rose from his seat
and snatched his water up from the table. He took a hearty sip. “And that goes for
you too, Lawrence, since you share his sentiments. I’ll just do this by my goddamn
self. I was doing
me
, before
either
of you mothafuckas entered my life, and I will find a way to continue, with or without
you! Born by myself…die by myself. Ride this shit out by my goddamn self! Have a good
fuckin’ day.”

“Saint,” Lawrence stated calmly. “You can’t be angry with us for being shocked and
concerned about this revelation.”

“I’m
not
angry and shocked. What I am, Lawrence, is disappointed! Something bigger is going
on here; what that is, I am not sure, but I can just feel it. It is time for me to
act. I don’t take this sort of thing lightly. How do you think I felt approaching
Xenia about this, huh? Donna and Traci were small potatoes compared to the concerns
I had about even broaching the topic with her. You think I enjoyed that? You think
it didn’t make me feel a bit queasy to ask this woman to uproot herself, after all
the fucking sacrifices she’s made for me? She’s married to a goddamn Angel child!
She has three Angel children because of me!” He put up three fingers.

“Three of ’em! Not one of them is just a normal civilian, notta one…not even two,
but
three
, and my eldest son is fucking just like me! Hassani is multi-tiered, so it will be
harder and more challenging with him and we still aren’t sure what the hell Isis is
doing yet! She’s been through
enough
!”

“Xenia puts up with all of my travelling and my busy schedule at times, me dealing
with people that won’t hesitate to blow my damn head off if they got a chance, my
craziness that I can’t fucking help, and my need for sex all the time! I am a lot
to handle, and yet, she is still there for me.”

“Okay…we could have done without that last detail.” Lawrence raised his hand and smirked.

“Well, it’s true! She didn’t sign up for this shit. All she did was fall in love,
and this is the thanks she gets. I’m a sex addict.” He placed his hand over his chest
as if pledging to the flag of the United States of America. “I’ve got some issues.
I can get real fucking angry at times, I’m a hot head, I know all of this shit about
myself… I am quite aware of my goddamn self and the woman is still fuckin’ wit’ me!
She
still
loves me to death! She is still on my team; she is still my number one cheerleader!

“She has my back and the one time she didn’t, anyone could see why she’d be confused
after seeing such a thing… and she has made up for that, tenfold. You two were the
least of my concerns, because
you
are what
I
am! You understand what it is like to be me and this is what you do to me?! Turn
your backs on me when I need you most?!” His entire body grew warm from head to toe,
and a purple swirl of smoke escaped his mouth. The burn in his eyes intensified… He
could feel them changing colors as his anger soared out of control. The men remained
quiet, but shot one another a glance, as if communicating telepathically, without
Saint’s inclusion.

“I’m sick over this. I have to do it though, I have to!” Saint was coming undone.
He needed his boys, but he wouldn’t beg them and besides, they had valid points. How
would he like it if the shoe were on the other foot? He grabbed his half-consumed
water and marched to the door. He left the men still sitting there as he prepared
to exit, left them literally in his smoking dust. As he reached the door, Jagger called
out.

“I fucking hate you for this…but I
trust
you. If you say you can feel it is the right thing to do, then…I’ll need to accept
that. Besides, if it wasn’t for you, I would’ve never met Traci.”

Saint stopped in his tracks but kept his back turned.

“Don’t do it because you think you owe me, Jagger.”

“I’m not. Just stating a fact.”

“The fact of the matter is, I believe that when someone is designed for us, our souls
find a way to meet that person.” Saint looked at him from over his shoulder. “I was
simply used as a middleman to possibly move the situation a bit faster in your favor.
But you…no, you need to do it because you’d like to, because we’re brothers. Because
this isn’t just me having some fit, you know. Shit, I do want to go home, for all
the selfish reasons you can think of and then some, but this isn’t
just
for me and I will keep saying that until it is crystal fucking clear!!!”

Saint’s body vibrated uncontrollably as he squeezed the cold metal of the knob. Something
was happening, something he couldn’t explain…

“No one has to suffer with me. If it would truly bring you misery, please, don’t come.
I want you to thrive
with
me!” He gritted his teeth and turned away from them. “Something is about to happen,
man and…I just wanted the two men I trust most, besides Raphael, by my side. That’s
it…nothing more. I don’t want you two upset… I really don’t.”

“Saint,” Lawrence called out. “Look at me.”

Saint slowly turned in the men’s direction. Lawrence was leisurely tossing his cell
phone between his hands like a small tennis ball. “I am going to call my wife and
explain to her the situation. I’m going to…” Lawrence paused and delicately set the
phone down before him, as if needing a moment. “I know you’d not lead me, my wife
or my son into a situation that we couldn’t get out of. I’m following you wherever
you go, and I’m doing it from the heart.”

“Now that you’ve explained it a bit better,” Jagger huffed, “and I can see how important
this is to you, I’m on board, too. Traci actually has spoken of moving out of California
before. She never mentioned New York, but I know the desire to eventually go somewhere
else is something she’s tossed around a time or two. I know she still wants to work
with the disabled, so,” he shrugged, “maybe she can find something there. We’ll see.”

“Gentlemen.” Saint smiled wide, no doubt showing all of his teeth. “I guarantee you
that I will help your spouses find new jobs if that is their desire. I know a lot
of people in the therapy field, Jagger, and I’m sure I can get some referrals. Lawrence,
Donna works in consumer resources, and I have no expertise in that, nor do I know
many people in that arena, but Xenia may, and I can certainly ask. She knows people
all over the country and can probably call in some favors. I will also pay all of
your relocation fees. I want to make this as easy for you as possible.”