Salvaged (35 page)

As if I held a piece of charcoal in my fingers ready to sketch, I
reached over and traced one of the small scars near her shoulder. I
imagined myself drawing her, battle scars and all.

The small raised lines were fascinating to me. They were a
reminder of all she'd gone through before she walked back into my
life three months before. She'd fought back and won, and added to
all of the other amazing things about her, the scars made her more
beautiful.

The more my fingers traced her skin, the faster my heart beat.
Touching her in that way was euphoric. I'd hugged her close to me
during her nightmares and held her hand briefly, but aside from earlier in the day, I'd never touched her like this. She lay there completely trusting and vulnerable.

"You better be careful, Riley Bennett," she whispered while smiling out of the corner of her mouth. Her eyes were still closed.

"What?" I teased back. "I'm sketching; leave me alone."

"Sketching?"

"In my head. I'm memorizing so I can recreate it later. If you
don't hush, I'll have to start all over again."

"Hmm."

Without thinking, I bent down and softly kissed a scar on
her shoulder. As soon as my lips touched her skin, my mind went
blank.

"Riley." She gave me a small warning. "You told me not to let
you do anything like this. You're playing with fire. "

My lips were warm. "Tell me about it."

I slowly kissed each scar while my left hand made its way to
her stomach. As soon as my fingers touched her skin, she shivered,
and feeling her respond to my touch in that way thrilled me. It was
electrifying.

The fingertip of my ring finger slowly circled her belly button,
and then, when it found the beginning of the scar, it traveled up her
body. As my fingers explored, my lips made their way to her neck.

"Riley, you better stop."

I ignored her.

My fingers left her skin and immediately felt cold but warmed
again as soon as they found the skin just below her neck. My fingers
and lips were close to concentrating on the same point on her body
as my blood inched closer to its boiling point.

"Riley," she said more sternly, "really, Riley, stop. You said yourself that we can't do this."

"Okay, I'll stop," I whispered into the curve of her neck but
didn't follow through. My fingers now followed the scar's trail south,
and just as my fingers felt like they were about to burst into flames,
my palm accidentally grazed her chest.

"Riley!" she yelled while hitting my hand away and sitting up.
"What are you doing?"

"Just playing a little, having some fun." I tried to pull her back
onto the ground.

"Don't touch me."

"What's the big deal, Attie? You need to learn how to have some
fun."

"Fun? That kind of fun?" she asked.

I grinned and rubbed her shoulder. "Why not? I was enjoying it,
and I think you were too."

She pulled her shoulder away. "I knew it!" she yelled, sounding
hurt.

"Knew what?"

"I would become another game. The true player just showed his
cards."

"Relax, Attie, it's not like I was tearing your clothes off or anything. God, lighten up! I was touching you; that's it."

"Really?" she yelled as she pulled a pair of shorts on over her
bathing suit. "If I would have let you continue, would you have, or
would you have stopped on your own?" She threw on a shirt and
glared over at me.

"I would have stopped."

"You're sure of that?" Her stare made me uncomfortable, so I
looked away. "I'm such an idiot. I allowed you to sleep next to me
for months, believing you cared about me. What? You were getting me right where you wanted me? Buttering me up, winning me
over? Conquer the virgin?" The look on her face was one of betrayal.
"Guess what? Game over, and I lost."

Her words stung.

"Charlie," I said softly.

"Don't call me that. Don't you dare call me that," she exclaimed
before crawling out of the tent.

My anger turned to grief as I realized I'd hurt her. I betrayed her
trust, and worse, I tried to make her feel bad for not letting me have
my way with her.

I looked toward the opening of the tent and saw her shoes sitting just inside the flap; she hadn't taken them with her when she
ran out. Crawling over, I grabbed them and then made my way out
of the tent after her.

Tammy, Tess, and Anne turned to look at me.

"What did you do?" Anne asked in an accusatory tone.

"We had a little disagreement; that's all."

"It didn't look little to me," Tammy said.

Just then Chase came into view. "I didn't see her. Are you sure
she ran that way?"

The girls nodded.

"She couldn't have gone far. I've got her shoes." I knew it sounded
stupid as soon as the words left my mouth.

"I doubt she was thinking about shoes," Chase said bluntly.
"Dude, she's gone."

Angry, I yelled her name and insisted that she return.

"Yeah, that's gonna draw her back," Tammy said as she walked
my direction. "I wanna know what you did."

All eyes were on me, and their knowing stares caused shame to
overtake me. I slapped my hands over my eyes. "I hurt her."

"What did you do?" Tammy yelled.

"I got a little carried away. I think I scared her."

"Riley!" Anne screamed.

I lowered my hands and looked back at Tammy. "I was mean to
her. I told her that she needed to lighten up and learn how to have
fun."

Tammy's hand reached my face, and my cheek instantly stung.

"I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing to me?" she screamed. "You need to
apologize to Attie."

She started to say more, but Anne stopped her. "That's enough,
Tammy."

"I will, Tammy, I will apologize. I'll never treat her like that
again; I give you my word. I don't know what came over me."

"I have a few ideas," she replied, her voice still cold.

"Tammy, please," Tess said. "This isn't helping; he feels horrible.
Look at him."

Tammy didn't budge. "Oh, I am."

"I'm sorry." I wanted her to believe me. I was sorrier than she
could ever know.

Her face softened. "You better go find her. It's gonna get dark
before long." Turning, she marched toward her tent and ducked
inside before I could say another word.

Chase was packing two backpacks with water, snacks, and a
blanket. He threw Matt a walkie-talkie. "Matt, you and Curt stay
here with the girls. Radio us if she comes back. Riley, put her shoes
in this bag," he said, throwing the pack at me and then turning to
Tess. "Go get her jacket."

She ran into the tent and quickly returned with Attie's OU
sweatshirt. Chase shoved it into the pack and zipped it up. Grabbing
the compass and two flashlights, he looked at me. "Let's go."

(Attie)

My mind was void of thought. All I could do was watch my feet
as they took each step. My pace was quick and frantic, and I realized
I was trying to run, run away. I wanted to escape.

My feet froze just as my next step would have taken me off a
ledge and several feet into the river. The water flowing below me was
mesmerizing.

I spotted an insect as it fell into the water. It moved with the
current as if it understood that the force propelling it forward was
more powerful than it was. The bug had realized its fate and wasn't
trying to fight back. To fight the surge would have been useless and
exhausting, more than something its size could muster.

I felt compassion for the insignificant creature.

But as quickly as it started, the struggle was over. The current
had somehow carried the bug against a rock onto the bank of the
river, and after a small rest, as if it realized that it was on a firm foundation, it went on with its journey.

Maybe it hadn't been so insignificant after all.

Goose bumps covered my body as I felt someone walk up and
stand next to me.

(Riley)

An hour rushed by, and the more we searched, the more frantic
I became.

We called for Attie over and over again, but her voice never
called back. Each time her name left my lips, I thought of the look
on her face before she left the tent.

"Oh God," I cried out, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Please keep her
safe. Please, please keep her safe."

Of all people, I, the person she called her best friend, hurt her, and if my immaturity ended up causing her even more pain, I
wouldn't be able to forgive myself.

Chase grabbed my shoulder. "You need to calm down. It's gonna be
okay. We'll find her, you'll work it out, and everything will be fine."

"I can't believe I hurt her. I promised her that I wouldn't hurt
her again."

"I know." He turned to continue walking but then changed
direction and walked directly up to me. "I'm your friend, Riley, but
I'm telling you right now, you hurt her like that again and it won't be
Tammy hitting you. Do you understand?"

"Yes," I whispered.

"Let's go." He walked off again.

I'd been to the river dozens of times, but nothing that we passed
looked familiar. Attie had never been here, and more than likely, she was
terrified. She probably didn't even think that I was looking for her.

Another hour passed, and we still hadn't seen any sign of her.
The forest grew darker, and with no city lights to illuminate the
night sky, I realized the chances of finding her were miniscule.

"Did you hear that?" Chase whispered.

"What?"

"Shhh, listen."

I stood still and concentrated on hearing the sounds around me,
but other than grasshoppers chirping, there was no sound.

"I'm almost positive I heard a girl's voice scream `stop."'

Every hair on my body stood on end, and my bones rattled. My
stomach seized just before I vomited.

I'd never been more fearful of the unknown in my life. What if
someone was hurting her?

Chase pointed to our right. "It came from that direction."

"Charlie!" I screamed while hunching over as my stomach continued to contract. "Charlie!"

"We have to keep walking."

"I can't move, Chase. I swear to God I can't move."

"You have to." Kneeling down next to me, he squeezed my
shoulder. "She needs you. You've got to pull yourself together."

My body went numb, but I soon followed the sound of his footprints in front of me.

After several minutes, Chase stopped and grabbed me. I followed his gaze to the ground. There on a rock was a red footprint.

"Blood," he announced. "Riley, she's hurt."

The dizziness became overpowering, my vision turned spotty,
and my mouth watered. I was about to vomit again.

(Attie)

Jesus spoke from beside me. "Are we going to talk about this?"

Anger consumed my body, and I felt like being pigheaded.
"About what?"

"About what happened with Riley?"

"He was being a jerk. Period, end of story. He isn't any different
than the rest of them."

"Well, that's a mighty big statement coming from someone who
has no idea what they're talking about." Jesus's words were sharp and
crisp in my ears, but I pretended not to hear.