Sanctuary Bay (24 page)

“And Ethan? What's your part in this?” Dr. Diaz asked.

“I slept until about noon and woke up to find my girlfriend gone.
Maybe dead,
right, Sarah?”

She sighed. There was no way to keep her Wolfpack vow and keep her sanity too. And she needed help. “Karina and I—and Izzy—are part of a secret society. I was initiated last month. They made me promise not to tell anyone.”

Ethan snorted. “The Wolfpack?”

Sarah gaped at him. “How do you know about that?”

“They asked me to join last year. I laughed in their faces,” Ethan said. “Can't say I knew Karina was in it, though.”

“She is. Was.” Sarah frowned. “The pack does a bunch of missions. Some of them are stupid—”

“Like kissing your roommate's boyfriend?” Ethan interrupted edgily.

“Yeah.” She blushed. “And some of them are kind of dangerous. Last night, for Halloween, we were supposed to commit a murder together. It was going to be a way to bond us all for life. We had to sacrifice one of our own.”

“Excuse me?” Ethan cried. “Murder?”

“It was just a joke,” Sarah said quickly. “At least I thought so. Karina got picked to be the victim and we took her out to the woods and tied her to a tree. I figured that was it—we'd just scare her and let her go. But then Izzy…”

“Izzy shot her,” Dr. Diaz finished for her. “That's what Sarah remembered.”

She shot a glance at Ethan. His body had gone rigid, and his jaw was tight. “But we went back and there was no body,” she told him in a rush. “Dr. Diaz came with me. There was no body! No sign of anything!”

“No. There wasn't,” Dr. Diaz agreed.

“And today everyone else in the pack acted like none of it ever happened. Even Izzy! Nate said we all just watched a movie. The other people I talked to said the same thing.” Frustrated, Sarah kicked at the leg of her chair. “It's making me crazy. They all had the same details—which movie, how Nate and I … I mean, nobody could answer me when I asked where Karina was. They all just said she was watching the movie too, but no one actually remembered talking to her.”

“So you're the only one who remembers the murder.” Ethan's hands were clenched on the arms of the chair.

“
If
it was a murder. Maybe it was a prank. Maybe they're all messing with me. I don't know,” Sarah told him. “I've always trusted my memory. But today I keep getting these weird little flashes of what they described, us all down in the den watching a movie. And there's no proof of anything else. But I remember seeing Izzy shoot Karina last night. Maybe it was faked, but I saw it.”

“Sarah, last night I thought you had too much to drink and that you were confused,” Dr. Diaz said. “But the fact that Karina is still gone troubles me.”

“Can't you find out where she is? If a student is missing, the school has to search for her, right?” Sarah asked.

“Tell that to my brother,” Ethan muttered.

“I'm going to call Dean Farrell about it right now,” Dr. Diaz promised.

She nodded, standing up to go with Ethan. Dr. Diaz sounded perfectly calm. But she saw his expression as she pulled the office door shut behind her. He was afraid.

“We have to keep looking, but I don't know where else to try,” Sarah said. “I already checked the den where we meet.”

“That's fine with me, Sarah. I'm done with you anyway,” Ethan snapped, walking off at a fast pace.

She watched him for a moment, then ran to catch up. “Why? You want to find Karina as much as I do. You have to keep helping me. There has to be something else we can do.”

“Were you ever going to tell me the truth?” Ethan demanded, whirling around so quickly that Sarah stumbled backward as he got right up in her face. “You thought you could just lie about what happened, and I'd go along with it like an idiot?”

“No! I didn't want to betray my friends,” she protested weakly. “I took a vow.”

“Your friends think killing someone, or pretending to, is some game, but you're still willing to lie for them,” he said, disgusted. “Screw you.”

“Ethan, wait. I wasn't lying. Well, not really,” she said. “I lied about us being in the library and Izzy and Karina fighting. But I'm not sure that anything happened. The rest of the pack says we were in the den watching a horror movie, and that we didn't go out anywhere or do any kind of crazy murder ritual. Doesn't that sound more plausible than what I remember?”

He didn't answer. He also didn't walk away again. “You said you remember everything. You said you trust your memory.”

“My memory is perfect, but it's really weird. It's not just that I can remember everything,” she said. “Sometimes I get these, I don't know, visions from the past—like, I remember things in such detail, with smells and sounds and feelings, that when the memory comes it seems more real than what's happening right now. It used to be hard for me to tell which was real, until I learned to recognize it. That's what happened when I freaked out in the asylum.”

“Okay…,” Ethan said doubtfully.

“Diaz told me that my memory means my brain processes input differently than other people's do. He said my brain might not even recognize the difference between the memory of a dream or a hallucination and a real memory. I never felt like I couldn't tell the difference between a dream and reality, but if my brain can't recognize the difference … maybe my memory isn't as perfect as I always thought.” Her voice broke, the realization making her feel like the earth was crumbling out from under her feet.

“So maybe this memory you have about killing Karina was a bad dream, but you keep remembering it as if it was true,” Ethan said. “Got it.”

“Maybe. Maybe my brain is in meltdown. What I'm saying is that I wasn't lying to you,” she replied. “I'm just not sure what happened. I have something that feels like a memory, but everyone else who was there has a different story. All I know for sure is I'm worried about Karina, and I don't know where she is, and I don't really trust the Wolfpack anymore, and I need some help.” Sarah drew in a shuddering breath. “I keep seeing her eyes. Karina's dead eyes,” she whispered.

Ethan's face paled.

“I don't want it to be true,” Sarah said, a sob escaping her. “Oh, god, I just want it to be a bad dream, but she's gone. She's gone.”

“Okay. It's okay.” Ethan reached out and pulled her into his arms, holding her tight. The last of Sarah's resolve broke, and she burst into tears, clinging to him.

“I'm sorry,” she mumbled against his chest.

“No worries. I'm scared too,” he said.

Sarah took in several deep breaths, willing herself to stop crying. The tears still came, but she managed to get control of the sobbing. “It hasn't always been this bad. I think maybe the Blutgrog screws with my memory.” It definitely screwed with the intensity of her sensations. It could be screwing with her brain in other ways too. “It's this drink we start the Wolfpack meetings with. It's supposed to be made with the old blood of the POWs, but it's basically grain alcohol.”

“Nice.” Ethan shook his head. “No wonder you're hallucinating.” Ethan's arms loosened slightly, and Sarah suddenly became very aware of the fact that he was holding her, her chest pressed tightly against him, their bodies entwined. She pulled away so fast that she almost fell over.

“Okay. I'm done with the freakout,” she said, wiping her cheeks. “So will you help me?”

“Yeah.” He smiled, a real, genuine smile. Sarah wasn't sure she'd ever seen one on his face before. “And then after we find Karina, we can work on figuring out what happened to my brother,” Ethan said. “You're the only one I've ever told about him.”

“Oh?” She wasn't sure why she felt surprised, but she did. Why would he tell her something he hadn't even confided to Karina? As far as she knew, Ethan didn't even like her, let alone trust her enough to share such a painful family secret.

“I tried, when I first got here,” Ethan went on. “I didn't say he never came home, I just asked all the seniors if they remembered him, but they didn't.”

“Most of his friends probably graduated with him,” Sarah guessed. “What about the teachers?”

Ethan sighed. “They just talked about how brilliant he was. Nobody had a clue he was missing.”

“If he fell off the ferry—”

“If he really fell off, the school should've had a huge memorial for him,” Ethan cut her off. “Everyone here should've known about it whether they were friends with him or not.”

Sarah blinked in disbelief. “You're right,” she said.

“Instead I'm supposed to believe that they told us he disappeared but didn't bother to mention it to the teachers who'd just handed him his diploma right before he got on the boat?”

“No. That doesn't make sense.” Sarah frowned.

“The truth is here. Somewhere. I just have to find it.” Ethan's gaze bounced around the marble hallway as if it were a cage.

“I'll help you.” Sarah reached for his hand and squeezed. “We'll help each other.”

Ethan nodded. “We know one thing for sure: Karina hasn't been around all day. Locate Karina,” he told his cell. “Just in case,” he added to Sarah.

“Student offline,” the cell responded.

“The cells don't work in the den,” Sarah said. “But I checked down there.”

“They don't work in the asylum either, but we checked there too.” Ethan was silent for a moment then said, “I want you to take me there, to the tree. You said you tied her to a tree.”

“Dr. Diaz and I already went back to—”

Ethan interrupted her. “I don't care. I need to see it.”

*   *   *

“So they all had exactly the same details?” Ethan asked as they walked through the woods.

“Yeah.”

“And you think they might all lie?” Ethan probed.

“They might,” Sarah admitted. “The Wolfpack values loyalty to the group above everything else. You put the other members above yourself. You do what you're told. You protect the group. I even thought maybe Nate came up with a story to give the Wolfpack an alibi for Karina's murder.”

Ethan raised one eyebrow.

“I know, I sound paranoid,” Sarah said. “But covering up a murder is a good reason to come up with a mass lie. And there was something rehearsed about what they all said—everybody kept using the same words, about me and Nate being … distracted.”

“But you don't remember this … distraction?” he asked.

“No. And I really believe I would if it were true.” She felt her cheeks grow warm. “Unless the Blutgrog has started eating my brain or something.” She rubbed her face with her fingertips, as if that would help her think more clearly. “But even if the pack is lying, it might not be to cover something up. Like I said, they love playing games, giving out missions. They could all be screwing with me.”

“And people do this voluntarily?” Ethan sounded disgusted.

“At least it would mean Karina is okay,” Sarah replied. She stopped, trying to get her bearings. The forest looked different in the daylight, and navigating it wasn't something she had a lot of experience in. “I know the clearing is close. There's an incredibly tall pine tree, and the clearing is underneath it.”

“There.” Ethan pointed to the left. “I know the Pine Tree. It's massive.” He led the way through the underbrush, holding branches so they wouldn't snap back and hit Sarah in the face.

“Ethan … I'm sorry,” she said.

“For what?”

“For being a bitch to you all this time. I thought you were an ass.”

“Don't go getting mushy on me,” Ethan replied. “I'm still an ass.”

She smiled.

“Here we are.” He surveyed the clearing. “Looks the same as always.”

It did. The thick carpet of orange-brown pine needles was smooth, as if no one had been here in weeks. Sarah's pulse sped up as she tried to ignore the memory trying to overtake her. The shot ringing out, echoing through the trees. Karina's head snapping back, then slumping forward, her eyes dead. Her eyes …

“This ring in the trunk. Did you guys do that?” Ethan's voice brought Sarah back to the present.

“The iron ring? Yeah. I mean, we used it to tie Karina's hands to the tree. I don't know who put it there.” They moved closer to the huge pine.

“It's been there as long as I've been here. I always wondered what it was for,” Ethan said grimly. “So Karina was here, with her arms up over her head.” He ran a finger along the circumference of the ring.

Sarah nodded. “At least in my memory.” And deep down in her gut, she felt it was true, the way her memories always were.

“I don't see any blood on the ring, or the tree, or the ground. Wait—” He knelt suddenly, staring at the base of the huge trunk. “What is this?”

Sarah bent down next to him and examined the weird little lump of yellowish gunk stuck to the wood. It was tiny—maybe half an inch long—and rounded as if it were a cylinder. “Part of a candle?” she guessed. “Or is it some kind of sap from the tree?”

“I think it's a bullet,” Ethan said slowly. “It's made of wax.”

“Okaaaay…” Sarah frowned. “How is it a bullet if it's wax?”

“I used to go on these crazy vacations with my family when I was little, and one time we were at a resort where they had lessons for the kids all day—you know, to keep them out of their parents' hair?”

Sarah nodded. There was no point in explaining that she hadn't even known kids were allowed at resorts and she wasn't entirely sure what a resort was anyway. She'd assumed it was a beach and sunsets and massages, based purely on the ads they put on city buses. But if there were children and lessons, well, she obviously hadn't gotten the whole thing right.