Sand Glass (4 page)

‘Your friend
here is in need of something only I can provide.’ Alex indicated
Jules, ‘So when you’ve finished being astounded by the company I
keep, you can thank me for getting you off the hook with respect to
the boss and his visitors that did issue forth out of Ye Olde Golf
Clubee!’

‘What?’

‘He does that a
lot.’ Alex said to Dr Rhodes, ‘I think his brain is shorting
out.’

‘But… but you
are friends?’

‘That is the
general meaning of this get together. To establish that we are all,
in fact, friends.’ He mixed something for Jules, ‘That is the
intention of the meet is it not. Oh! And Davey… I do have to be at
work this morning. So while you are swanning around saving the
world, I’ll be fending off any unfavourable comments from the cube
of gammon. So think of me at four o’clock. Only an hour to go
without murder being committed.’

‘So let me get
this straight? Dr Violette Rhodes is poetry girl?’

‘Finally. The
circuit is rerouted. I’ll just run and get some daily slave robes
on. Then I will have to scoot. Feel free to stay and help yourself…
just don’t smoke anything in here that you find… it’s not all quite
ripe yet.'

Dr Rhodes
pursed her lips but didn’t say anything.

‘The Golf club
thing. I thought that wasn’t yet?’

‘It’s not. They
were just looking around. Guided tour. The art department got their
crayons out in full sets for a change.’ He left the room and was
heard bounding up the stairs. We all went back into the hall.

Alex wearing a
tie was truly a weird and wonderful sight. It would be removed
almost as soon as he got to the work station, and then it sat in a
drawer until it was time to go home. As long as you looked right on
entering and leaving.

‘And we’re
supposed to be creative.’ Alex sighed and then grinned making a
pretend strangling motion with his left hand.

We all parted
company on the side street. Alex drove away in a Land Rover that
mysteriously wasn’t blocked in. I marvelled at the complexity of
connections in all our lives as we set off for Janey’s new
place.

I was just
beginning to think that today would be straight forward, when Dr
Rhodes slammed the brakes on. There was a car in front of us. For
some reason it had suddenly stopped, and was trying to do a
parallel park straddling the entire width of the available space on
the street.

‘Hold tight.’
Dr Rhodes smoothly slammed it into reverse gear. We were sliding
backwards like a roller skate. I wasn’t sure what was wrong with
the black car in front, but they quickly stopped the manoeuvre and
were catapulting towards us down the road.

‘I am
displeased.’ muttered Dr Rhodes. She braked again, swiftly reversed
round and sharply turned the car into the traffic on the main road.
The other cars were forced let her in. She floored it and overtook
five vehicles, driving down the wrong side of the road. The black
car was somewhere behind dipping in and out of the traffic.

‘Left here.’
said Jules.

Violette cut
across in front of the nearside car and missed by a few inches.
There was a screech of brakes as we shot down the short road and
then out into another main street. She took a left and then pulled
into a garage.

‘Get down.’ She
ordered us. She quickly hopped out of the car and went into the
small shop that was attached. I saw her get her mobile out. The
black car cruised past slowly. I saw it reflected in the glass on
the petrol pumps. We kept our heads down. Five minutes later she
came back.

‘Mints.’ She
handed them to Jules. Then with a snort of icy annoyance, ‘This is
becoming most annoying!’

‘The car is too
recognisable.’ I said, ‘perhaps we better take public
transport?’

‘Yes. Perhaps.
But I have a better Idea.’

‘Which is?’

‘Perhaps we
should abandon this course of action for today.’ She tapped on the
steering wheel with the tips of her nails.

‘I will go and
see her on my own then.’ I said. ‘perhaps you and Jules need a
little time together.’

‘It is very
true.’ Dr Rhodes seemed to be making a calm assessment of the
facts; ‘yes, alright. I’ll drop you at the station. If you take the
nine thirty-two, you can make it to Wood Green. It’s a good twenty
minute walk from there, but that is the safest option. If you are
followed go into the shopping centre. I think there is one
there.’

‘Well there
will be shops!’ I joked.

‘Indeed.’ she
said.

She let me out
in the street next to the station car park; ‘Good luck. Or
something you find appealing,’ she said.

I pushed the
yellow door to. She slid down the electric window and leaned across
Jules. He had fallen asleep in the passenger seat.

She smiled at
him with a different look in her eyes. Then looking back at me
said: ‘We will go to the park. I’ve got a rug and some flasks in
the back.’

She gave me a
slip of paper. ‘Ring my mobile later, after you’ve talked to Janey.
I’ll bring Jules if she wants to have a word with him.’

‘Do you think
he’ll still be hung-over then?’

She smiled very
sweetly, ‘He’ll be much better later. Trust me. I’m going to get
him a little fresh air. We’ll ring you at four o’clock whatever
happens. I think we need to move as fast as possible on this. In
the mean time I’ll get in touch with George. And see if there is
anything that can be used.’

‘What about
everyone getting together?’

‘Alex has
offered his place. He isn’t connected except by an accident of
poetry and other things… so that is where we will meet. Bring milk.
He never seems to have it in the house.’

‘Ok. Err, Dr
Rhodes.’

‘I think it’s
about time you called me by my first name. I’m not the adult to a
class of crazy kids anymore. No job in that area. If I say
anything, it’s strictly as a friend. Oh and Davey… to stop
embarrassing you. I will warn you next time. So you can look away.’
She looked at the sleeping Jules with a softened expression.

‘I’m happy for
you.’ I stuttered.

‘I think that
you ought to know that Jules has been my aim for a very long time.
I hadn’t to cross the line. Ironic isn’t it? That losing my job
with the Project might actually be the best think that has happened
this week.’

‘But you are
still Psyche girl.’

She smiled.
‘Yes Davey. I still am. You can depend on my services for the
foreseeable future. I very much want the bad stuff to stop. Just as
you do.’

‘Thanks
Violette. I’ll see you later.’

She roared off
down the street and I got a one way ticket to the stop one further
on than she had suggested. I decided to get off a stop later as it
was about equidistant to Janey’s house.

As the train
rattled its way along the tracks I ached inside for her touch. The
fact that she wasn’t my Janey, made that ache all the more acute. I
would have to be content with the simple fact of her being there.
Something caught my eye. I watched as someone got on at Wood Green.
I thought they were familiar. The next stop I got off. So much for
coincidence. It was Mrs Cardell! Horrible woman. But she hadn’t
seen me, as she had her nose stuck in a woman’s magazine.

I threaded
through the early morning crowds. Twenty minutes later on a brick
path, I was without any coherent thought. She had me. All reason.
All judgement. In one kiss she had stolen my soul. I wanted it
back. If this Janey could show me that the mad dream I had lived
was over… then I would fall on my sword without complaint. Broken
hearts are easy things to ignore if the world is falling apart
around you.

I was still
trying to find the impulse to ring the doorbell, when it sprung
open and Marcia grabbed me by my arm and yanked me inside. I yelped
in pain. It was the right one. She slid bolts and dragged me into a
back room full of paper models. My confused mind was reeling with
searing nerve signals that would take a full ten minutes to fade.
Janey stood by a window. I blinked. Marcia pushed me forward.

‘There’s no
need to be so rough!’ I said sharply. Pain came back. And doubt. No
reason to explain the fear though, gnawing into a wooden bit of the
mind: a bottom drawer; out of which reason fell like sand when the
whole thing is shaken about.

‘She said that
you know my brother?’ This wasn’t what I had expected.

‘Yes.’ I rubbed
my arm leaning forward slightly as I did so. I squeezed my eyes
shut partly from the double hurt of the physical, and humiliation
of the ego. Also because suddenly I didn’t want to see her. Then I
saw that shielded as she was in a halo of backlight her face was
kept from my mind.

‘Why won’t you
look at me?’ her voice was very calm, a quietude that barely
inflected with the admonition.

‘I don’t know
you,’ I opened my eyes towards the floor.

Her voice
travelled round to the left. There was now a table between us.

‘Davey…’ a
whisper. I peeked sideways slowly, not heeding the arm for now.
Eyes moved near to her eyes then back. Slowly I stared and blinked,
and blinked and stared. She didn’t move at all. Something burned
inside me. A flame licking its way over paper and destroying the
words printed on it. Yet like a magician, I unfolded them from my
palm again unharmed. This was the ultimate strangeness. To feel my
own mind fracture and break in to two alternate versions of myself.
I thought it was the symbol that had given me control and power
over this from within.

‘Just look
now.’ said Marcia from somewhere behind me.

I looked. And
the whole world began to splinter and fracture into as many
different versions as there were grains of sand on a beach. I could
see them… I was them; every possible me. Did I just see this? Or
could the two women see it too?

I tried to
close my eyes but this just made it worse. The earth colours would
help me find balance in this place, but now it didn’t seem to be
working.

‘Davey!’ I was
not one voice but many. Janey. Many copies of her, or perhaps my
many experiences of her.

I ended up on
my knees. The riot of colours around me swirled faster and faster.
I could see it now. It was pouring backwards, away from the moment
I was in to before I had arrived, yet here I was. Janey and Marcia
talking for a long time; darkness, Marcia arriving the previous
night. The girls’ night in sat on the carpet with Martinis drowning
too many olives and the TV on in the background.

I found myself
still kneeling on the carpet. I was sweating and trembling
violently. Marcia knelt beside me. ‘I’m sorry for doing that,’ she
said, ‘but trust me, it was better than going through it
twice.’

‘What just
happened?’ I felt sick and lightheaded. Someone handed Marcia a
glass of water, she gave it to me. Sitting on the carpet I knew a
peculiar thing, it really was possible to be alone with yourself. I
wasn’t sure if I liked the company or not.

‘It is where
the truth of experiments I have just authorised become a reality
that is only resisted by you two.' said Janey's voice, 'Everyone
else…. All of them. They went crazy.’ She came and sat on the floor
with us, ‘All of the experiments, and we never thought we could be
the carriers of this wave.’

‘Are you really
Janey?’

‘Yes.’

‘I know your
brother.’ I said still trembling and chilled.

'Yes. Tell me
what happened. That strand of one possible world.'

I drank again
before replying. Marcia put her arms round my shoulders in a
reassuring way.

‘I watched him
die....' I squeezed my eyes shut and then opened then again, 'and
in all my life I never want to see that happen to any of us. And
especially not you.’ I looked at her fully then. She was all there;
the brightest gleam of intelligence, the humour, the sadness, the
thoughtfulness, every bit of it. And her hair rolled like a glossy
tide over her right shoulder and touched my knees as she leaned in,
lips parted and breathed in this knowledge.

‘Thank you.’
she said. She stood then and came round beside me just by my left
elbow.

‘Come now.’ She
helped my confused body to untangle to a standing position. We all
went into a little conservatory.

In the cool
morning light in a cane padded chair I knew what I had so lately
denied. I would go back.

Marcia went out
for a moment, while Janey spoke to me, ‘Here. In this place, I have
taken the temporary name of “Harriet Edison”. Marcia has told me
everything after what happened last night. So I will spare you the
show and tell. She had “got in there first” as it is said, and I
hope you don’t mind if I don’t actually kiss you just yet. Because
I’m still in a really strange place with Jared being alive in some
fashion in one of the alternative places….’ She stopped talking and
seemed to zone out for a moment; then shaking herself she
continued: ‘I found the equation to prove that the alternate space
and time are really viable… but this… it is too well attached…’ she
trailed off. I looked at her fully again. The tattoo was burning;
as I was assimilating the version I had chosen. But the other
versions were still there ready to move in again. Without the
overcoming power of my strange immunity to the paradox of it all, I
would not have been able to make her even vaguely aware of my
connection. Marcia had done it too. She came back in then, sat down
next to Janey, and explained to me about the hours before and what
it had been like. An experiment had worked. But this was beyond
all.

‘I just got my
letter.’ said Janey as Marcia handed her an envelope, ‘they want me
to go and join them for some test runs of the Sand Glass
trials.’

I looked at the
A4 paper as she unfolded it in front of me. It was exactly like
mine.