Sasha: The Awakening (The Wallflower Series Book 2)

Sasha: The Awakening

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©
2016 by R.J. Fletcher

Book editing/formatting by R.J. Fletcher

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping, or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, names, incidents, organizations, and dialogue in this novel are either the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Epilogue

Adaline: The Silent

It was difficult to breathe through the panic rising in her tiny chest, she remembered that much. She had been in there for hours as the screaming continued from the living room. The place was foreign and she didn’t want to be there anymore. Her cries of anguish, calling out for her mother, fell upon deaf ears as the two strangers continued to verbally assault one another. Their words were daggers, tearing at flesh and old wounds to watch gleefully as their victim bled tears or shuddered in pain at the elusive blow.

It was all too familiar to Sasha. Her home before had been no different when her mother brought one man after the other into their tiny apartment. But at least there had been a certain comfort in being surrounded by a familiar face. Not this time. Because this time, she didn’t know if the loud voices would suddenly become screams. If the anger these two displayed would somehow turn upon her with interest in joining a vicious game. Her little body shuddered in the dark and damp closet; her bottom becoming sore from the hard wood. But she refused to step outside what little haven she had finally discovered. Her heart skipped a beat as the voices neared; there were heavy footsteps that passed by but luckily they seemed to not know that she existed. They never seemed to remember her.

But today was different from most. Because today, the closet door swung open and Sasha was able to look up into the hard eyes of the woman she had been left with. With straggly hair and tired wrinkles upon her face, she reached down and grasped Sasha by her forearm, yanking the young girl from the closet.

“What are you doing in there?” she demanded of her. “You should have been in bed hours ago.”

Instead of responding to the woman’s question, Sasha stated simply, “I want to go home. I want my Mommy.”

From behind the woman’s shoulder, Sasha heard a rough scoff with a grumbled, “Ungrateful bitch.”

The woman sent a glare behind her shoulder. “What the hell is your problem? She’s got no one!”

“Exactly!” The loud man shoved the woman over to look down upon Sasha. With his large meaty hands, he pointed to her. “Listen, you stop the ‘I want my Mommy’ bullshit now. Because obviously, your
mommy
didn’t fucking want you. Get over it!”

“Paul!” the woman gasped in horror. “Don’t talk to her like that. You are such an evil asshole! I can’t stand you!” Her screams were soon disrupted by the loud smack of his hand across her cheek. As she fell to the floor, Sasha’s eyes widened in horror and she raced back into the closet. Her tiny hands desperately tried to close the door even as she could feel the hairs on the back of her neck rise at the sounds of heavy footsteps nearing her.

Before she could hear the grateful
click
of the door, the brass knob swung out and hit her square in her cheek. With the force, her body flew back into the wall of the closet, her head slamming against its surface. There were stars in her eyes as she tried to open them. In her mind, she heard the voice of her mother again. But when her vision cleared, in her mother’s place was a burly man, staring down at her with triumph.

“It’s time you were taught a lesson little girl.”

Her mouth opened to scream, but nothing came out. Her skin perspired heavily and her heart raced erratically in her chest at the realization, no one could hear her scream. No one could help her. As he leered over her, for a moment she froze. Time stood still as she realized what this man would do to her. Her eight years of life seemed to flash before her very eyes, and the most consistent image was that of her mother. There was despair and heartbreak associated with the woman. But it was the only home she had ever known, and she wanted to go back. Frantically, almost unknowingly, she reached out and scratched the rubber skin on his face as he bent down towards her. It was a frail fight but proved effective as her fingernail scratched the surface of his eyes.

He roared in pain and blindly stepped away from her, falling to the floor. Without a second glance, Sasha sprinted from the room to the front door and escaped into the crouching darkness of the night.

She opened her eyes frantically. Her skin was sticky with perspiration at the memory. It was one of the many from her childhood that had been haunting her in the past few weeks. She didn’t know what brought it on, but it seemed as if she was reminding herself of every painful moment of her past. But she didn’t need the reminder. She carried the weight of it on her shoulder every day without preamble.

Sasha could vividly recall that night. It had been the first home she had been placed in after her abandonment. Once again, the police had picked up an eight-year-old girl walking, waiting…it hadn’t mattered. All that mattered was that she had been alone. Thankfully, she hadn’t been returned to her first foster family; the bruises on her cheeks and arms were enough proof of the horrors that had taken place there.

But she sometimes wondered why she had felt more helpless with the families that were warm to her, that welcomed her. Maybe it was because she knew with each passing moment, her days were numbered. She didn’t belong in their families, and eventually grew to resent them pretending otherwise. At first there had been a naïve hope. As her memories of her mother became less and less vivid, her attentions centered upon other womanly figures in her stead. But after countless placements with no sign of it ending, Sasha eventually gave up hope and became angry. It only lasted so long before holding it within was too much, leaving her weak and despondent.

It was that weakness that had led her to Dmitri. She physically shuddered at the memory and cursed herself. Not allowing her mind to go down that road, Sasha tore the sheets from her body and walked into the shower. She wouldn’t let this be another night her mind secretly yearned for him. Because nothing could take the place of her last memories of him and how he screamed at her. How he had torn her apart. Just like the couple from her first foster family, there had been viciousness in his words that tore at her piece by piece until she had been nothing at his feet. Before, she had let anger of disappointed hopes and dreams of a mother, a family overwhelm her. It consumed her to the point that she had become weak, an open target for ridicule and abuse. But now she knew to hold onto her anger, to own it so that it didn’t overtake her. Instead, it lived lightly beneath the surface, ready to attack. But only on her command.  

It was good her dreams (really, nightmares) had awoken her. Today she was starting fresh. Reaching into the closet with a smile, she took out the iconic robes. As soon as she walked across that stage, there would be no looking back, she promised herself. The nightmare would have to stop because she couldn’t allow herself to live in the past. The yearning for him would end because she would make sure the day he shoved her away was the day he lost something great.

Dmitri had never felt more helpless as he watched Nadia’s sobs become louder. She was frantically apologizing to him, hoping that her pleas would make him change his mind. But he knew this was what was best for her. Dmitri placed his hands on her shaking shoulders and looked into her eyes.

“Nadia, you need to be here…just give it a shot.”

She shook her head, “Don’t leave me here! I’ll try harder, I promise. Just give me another chance.”

Dmitri wanted to believe her. He wanted to think that he was capable of healing her. But even if he allowed himself to believe her for just one moment, all it took was looking down at her thin, frail body to make him realize he wasn’t capable of it. It seemed that in just the blink of an eye, Nadia had gotten worse. All her clothes hung loosely from her body. Her strength was like that of a child. He refused to sit back and watch as she disintegrated right in front of him.

Dmitri embraced her, careful of how fragile she now was. He breathed in her familiar scent and found himself close to tears. He couldn’t lose his sister! He could almost feel the panic beginning to surface in his chest at the thought of seeing her in the same hospital bed that had taken his mother. Now, it would be different he promised himself. He would do everything in his power to save her from herself. Even if it meant he lost her love and adoration in the end and, with it, the last vestige of a family he had.

A nurse cleared her throat as she entered the room Nadia would be sharing with another patient. Reluctantly, Dmitri released his younger sister and turned to the intruder.

“I’m sorry to interrupt but visitor hours will be ending soon.” The young woman gave a friendly smile, her eyes lingering on Dmitri. He recognized that look but ignored it.

“Thank you. I’ll be leaving soon.”

With one last flirtatious glance, she sashayed out of the room, closing the door behind her.

“Okay, Nadia. I want you to call me whenever you need me. I’m not leaving you here. I’m not abandoning you. But you need more help than simply I can give you. Okay?”

There was no response. The young woman had her head bowed. He could tell from the tension in her shoulders that she had transferred her sadness and fear into anger. In that moment, he could do nothing about it, however. The psychologist had warned him that she may see him as the enemy now, and though it killed him to have Nadia group him with his parents, it was for her own good.

On the ride home, Dmitri felt almost frozen in time. There were dark circles around his eyes, and he had lost some weight. He could never have imagined how difficult things could become in just a matter of weeks. But after Nadia had been released from the hospital, his life had taken a significant spiral. His thoughts had been continually overcome with worry and anxieties about her health while still trying to maintain the other aspects of his life, like work. The company was expanding- it was both good and bad news for him. He had been promoted but with that promotion came new responsibilities that seemed to take over his life- time he needed to care for Nadia.

After many sleepless nights, his options had dwindled. Afraid that Nikolai and Natalia would receive word about their daughter and intervene, Dmitri had been forced to seek a treatment center. Even though he had known about the seriousness of her condition, nothing could have prepared him for actually witnessing the severe effects of the eating disorder. No amount of research could have emotionally prepared him. Watching his sister experience fainting spells and hair loss was nothing compared to the sheer frustration of having her not eat. He could never understand it! It was as his worry came to anger and he began to yell and scream at her that he knew he had reached his limits. He hadn’t been helping her by placing blame and trivializing what amounted to a distorted frame of mind.

And he didn’t want to admit that a part of his anger was misdirected. There were moments in which he remembered seeing Sasha in his home. It was the first time he had ever experienced such intense longing for a woman. The moment she had stepped into his office, he had still been in denial of it. Seeing her move on, however, had brought it back tenfold because it made salient his inability to do so. For a man so used to being alone and proud in his solitude, Dmitri had never been so overwhelmed by both the fear of loss and the mournful regret that followed.

He knew it was his own fault, but in those moments of frustration he wondered if the only family he had ever cherished had cost him something more. It was his devotion to his sister that came between them, wasn’t it? Or had it been his cowardice?

Whatever it was, it didn’t stop him from attending her graduation. He soon found himself bypassing his home to witness one of the pivotal moments in Sasha’s life. They had hardly spoken about her graduation; he remembered that she had shyly asked him to attend. Though then he had been less enthusiastic about going to the ceremony, he now waited anxiously for her name to be called and couldn’t help the smile that spread across his handsome features as her small frame came into his view. Her skin practically glowed as she received her degree. Despite the large robes covering her, he had a masculine appreciation for the distinct sway in her hips as she walked off the stage. She became lost in the sea of the crowd after that. But he stayed, hoping to catch at least one more glimpse.

As he waited, a flash of red caught the corner of his eye. And before he knew it, Teagan stood in front of him with her hands on her hips and a hard scowl spread across her features. Caught, Dmitri could only give her a sheepish grin.

“Hello, Teagan. It’s good to see you. Congratulations are in order.”

She responded to his warm greeting with almost a snarl. “What the hell are you doing here? I can’t believe you have the nerve to even show your face!”

He couldn’t be surprised or upset at the hostility she directed his way. Teagan was fiercely protective of Sasha- a fact he had learned pretty early on. And, while he liked that there would always be someone to have her back, he resented being at the opposite end of it.

“I know, you don’t need to preach to me about the inappropriate nature of my visit. I just had to see her again. I have no intention of approaching her or even letting her know that I’m here.”

As he spoke, Teagan’s eyes looked closely at him, taking in his appearance. A wicked smile soon replaced the unwavering frown, “You look horrible!”

Dmitri rolled his eyes and said nothing.

Her smile soon became a laugh of triumph. “It serves you right!” she exclaimed. But soon she seemed to have lost the humor she found in the situation. “In all seriousness though…how could you do that to her?”