Saving Tatum (Trace + Olivia #4) (37 page)

“Really.” Waving his hand over the top of his jeans he smirked. “I don’t want to, but I can always take care of this myself,” he then gestured with said hand to show exactly what he meant, as if I didn’t already know.

I sat up, my hair falling forward to cover my breasts, which were still covered by my bra.

I bit my lip. Taking a deep, steady breath I steeled myself to say something that made me horribly uncomfortable.

I leaned towards him and his eyes sparkled. I let my lips brush against his ear and murmured, “I want your cock inside me.”

Okay, so it
definitely
wasn’t the dirtiest thing I could say, but for me…it was pushing it. Jude smiled wickedly, seeming to like it, so maybe I’d have to get better at pushing my sexual boundaries.

In record time he unclasped my bra,
took off my panties, and removed his jeans and boxers. He maneuvered me with ease so that my head was on the pillow and my hair fanned around me. He stared at me like I was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, but there was something else I saw in his eyes, and that look could only be summed up in one word.

Love.

L. O. V. E.

Four simple letters, but when you combined them together it created the greatest emotion we ever experienced as humans.

I’d never truly known what it meant to love another human being until I met Jude.

Yes, I loved my family, but that kind of love was different. It was the love of blood and bonds.

But the love I had with Jude it was a choice.
My
choice. He gave me happiness and he pushed me to be a better person. We had our ups and downs and more would come in the future, but I’d learned that it was worth working through, because this kind of love wasn’t something you gave up on and you did have to work at it. It wasn’t easy, but it was
right
.

He took my lips between his as he guided himself inside me. My body tightened at first and then relaxed to allow him inside.

He slid out all the way and murmured, “Say it again.”

If this didn’t feel so good, I’d probably kill him for torturing me.

Instead of whispering it, this time I clasped his face between my hands and stared into his eyes. “I want your cock inside—”

Before I could finish he pushed into me and I gasped.

He moved slowly, rolling his hips against mine in a way that had my back arching and my fingers clawing at his back. Sweat dampened our skin as we moved.

He lowered his head, swirling his tongue around my nipple, and then showing attention to the other.

I whimpered from the delicious pain as he lightly bit it. Fuck, he knew what he was doing. I was going to have to get over my embarrassment and read a book or something so I could show him the same kind of attention, because he deserved it.

He quieted my cries with a kiss when I cam
e. When my body stopped shaking he pulled out and I whimpered.

He climbed off the bed and grabbed my ankles. I yelped as he pulled me down the bed and turned me over. He smacked his palm lightly against my ass and I let out a squeal. “Jude!” I gasped with surprise.

His only reply was a chuckle. Figures.

He smoothed his hand over the spot he just smacked. “I couldn’t resist.”

He grasped my hips, positioning me the way he wanted. His fingers found my folds and then I felt his…cock—maybe if I started thinking the dirty words more then they’d stop feeling so…well,
dirty
—nudge my entrance.

He slid in all the way and my gasp was so loud that he gave my ass another light smack. “Quiet, Tate.” He warned.

“Feels so good,” I hummed, turning my head so I could see him behind me. He stood so strong and powerful, but his hands touched me gently.

He leaned down so his chest covered my back. He grabbed my hair, pulling it away from my face. “You said slow, then fast, so get ready, Tate. I’m not holding back.”

Oh, the look in his eyes. It was full of mischief and excitement. I felt my groin tighten around him. “Yes,” I gasped. “Please. Hard. Fast. Now.” Apparently I could only speak in one-word sentences at the moment. Jude didn’t seem to mind, though.

He lifted up and grasped my hips.

He slid out of me and back in roughly. The headboard banged against the wall and I would’ve thought it was funny if I wasn’t too preoccupied focusing on the way his body felt joining mine.

Holy fuck, I really loved this position and wondered why we hadn’t tried it before. He was so deep and hit something inside me every time he pushed into me.

“Fuck, Tate,” he growled and his fingers dug into my hips harder. My legs began to shake. I turned my head further so I could watch him.

His head was bowed back, his eyes closed, and his mouth slightly parted. The muscles in chest and stomach flexed and rippled with every movement. Watching him like he was now, I realized he’d been holding back on me. He hadn’t wanted to push me too far, but this time he was letting go and taking what he wanted, and I fucking loved that I could give it to him.

He pulled out, stroking himself and then sticky warmth covered my back. He collapsed beside me with a grunt.

“Jesus.” He groaned.

“My name’s Tate,” I retorted with a lazy smile.

He c
racked his eyes open. “Such a wise ass,” he chuckled. He reached over, running his index finger along my lips. “You’re lucky I love this smart mouth of yours so much.”

“Is that so?” I asked, stifling a yawn. After our lovemaking I was exhausted. My lids lowered with the threat of sleep.

“Mhmm,” he nodded, looking as tired as I felt. “Don’t move,” he warned, rising from the bed. He pulled on his boxers and headed into the hall.

He returned a moment later with a damp cloth
and wiped off my back.

“There,” he murmured, leaning further up my body to kiss the back of my neck.

I rolled over to face him as he tossed the cloth in a hamper.

He opened a drawer on his
dresser and grabbed a shirt. He tossed it at me and I managed to catch it, despite the fact that my tired body didn’t want to move. I slipped the long-sleeved shirt over my head, reveling in how it smelled like him. I nearly drowned in it though. I knew when I stood the length would nearly hit my knees.

Jude climbed onto the bed beside me. He pushed the covers down and then pulled them over us. He spooned my body against his and yawned. “Nap time.”

“What about dinner with my dad?” I rolled over to face him, suddenly alert.

He lifted his head so he could see the clock that rested on the nightstand. “We have plenty of time,” he assured me. “Now roll back over,” he tickled my side, “so I can hold you.”

I did as he said, not because he was being bossy, but because I wanted to. I’d become used to Jude wrapping his body around mine as we drifted off to sleep.

In fact, it was getting more difficult to go to sleep without him.

Since we’d worked things out he’d brought up living together a few more times, but I always shot him down. It wouldn’t take much more convincing on his part for me to give in.

The fact of the matter was, I wasn’t scared anymore.

Jude told me he wanted it all with me—a future filled with marriage and babies.

I used to never imagine my future, but now I did, and it included Jude as my husband and a dark haired baby boy.

One day.

One day soon.



I sat straight up, staring around the dark room.

Wait…

Dark. Room.

“Oh, shit.”

My eyes darted to the clock and widened at the time.

“Jude,” I groaned, pushing his shoulder.

“Hmmm?” He hummed in his sleep. He cracked one eye open. “What?”

“We were supposed to be having dinner with my dad an hour ago!” I slid from the bed, frantically searching for my clothes. “We slept too long!”

“Fuck,” he growled hotly, rubbing the heels of his hands against his eyes. “I’m sorry, Tate.”

“Don’t say you’re sorry!” I cried, grabbing my shorts off the floor. “Just get out of bed and get dressed. I have to call him and tell him we’re coming.”

“Oh, we came alright,” he smirked.

“Jude!” I picked his shirt up and threw it at his head, where he sat on the edge, deliciously rumpled.

He laughed as he put his shirt on. “It’s true,” he shrugged.

Once we were dressed we did our best to fix our rumpled appearance, but it was futile. It would take my dad two seconds to figure out what we’d been up to. I only hoped he didn’t comment on it. I wasn’t sure I could handle the embarrassment right now.

Since I’d driven here by myself we had to take separate cars to my house.

I used the time to try to calm down. I told myself repeatedly that everything would be okay, but so far I didn’t believe my own words.

It might’ve been better if Jude and I could’ve ridden together. I was sure he’d have done a far better job at making me feel better, because my self-imposed pep talk wasn’t working.

When we got to my house
I was shaking like a leaf.

“Everything’s going to be fine, Tatum,” I told myself one last time before pushing my stiff body out of the car.

Jude met me and took my hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Everything is going to be fine.” They were the same words I’d just told myself but they sounded more believable coming from his mouth. 

Jude paused at the front door
and gave me time to catch my breath.

When I knew I was okay—well, as okay I could be—I nodded and he opened the door.

The house was so eerily quiet that I almost believed he hadn’t arrived home yet, but when we entered the kitchen it was lit up, and he sat at the same spot at the kitchen table where he’d been the last time. Only now, he looked very different. His eyes weren’t angry and tired; instead they were full of trepidation and worry. He’d put on a little weight and his smile wasn’t grim like it was before. He wasn’t quite normal—or the smiling, loving dad I remembered from
most
of my childhood—but it was an improvement. So, I’d take it.

“Hi, Tatum,” he nodded at me, clasping his hands, with a sad smile on his lips. “Jude.” He nodded at him too. “Sit, please,” he waved his hands at the free chairs. “I got your message
that you were running late so I just ordered the pizzas. They should be here shortly.”

“How are you?” I asked. I wasn’t sure what the customary thing to say in a situation like this was, so I settled on that. It seemed harmless and safe enough.

“Better,” he replied, his shoulders lifting slightly in a barely-there shrug. “I have a long way to go.” He cleared his throat and looked between Jude and I. “I want to apologize about the horrible things I said to you both. I wasn’t…well.” He flinched. “I hope you can both forgive me.” I nodded and Jude did as well. Speaking solely to Jude, he said, “I’m so sorry for the hurtful things I said and that you witnessed. You are good enough for my daughter.” Lowering his head, he mumbled, “You’re a far better man than I am.” He lifted his head gradually and when he looked at me tears shimmered in his eyes. “I was horrible to you, Tatum. I can’t believe the things I did and said to you. To your brother. Your mom,” he bit down on his fist and shook his head. Regaining his composure, he continued, “I will spend the rest of my life regretting everything I’ve done. I wasn’t a good husband or father.”

“You weren’t always horrible, dad,” I interjected. “There were good times. Remember those too, they shouldn’t be forgotten just because there’s bad.
” I slid out of my seat and walked over to him. He startled when I reached out to hug him. “I love you, dad.” Pulling away, I looked into his eyes, “But you have to understand that I need to protect myself and if…” I closed my eyes, taking a steadying breath so I could say what I needed to say. “If things go back to the way they were before, I will leave.”

He nodded his head. “I understand. I’m trying my hardest to be better.”

“I know,” I kissed the top of his head. “I’m putting the past behind me and we’re starting new.” I stared into his eyes so he’d know I was serious. “It’s up to you to decide where we go from here. Understand?”

His eyes closed and he let out a shaky breath. “I understand.”

“Good,” I stood up straight as the doorbell rang. Jude left to get the door and came back carrying the pizzas.

“Let’s go to the family room and watch TV.” I pointed and Jude immediately turned on his heel, heading out of the kitchen. I turned to look at my dad over my shoulder. “Come on, dad. Let’s put a movie on and eat. Like the good time
s.”

“Like the good times,” he mimed, pushing his hands against the table as he stood. He grabbed my arm, halting me in the doorway so I couldn’t leave. My heart sped up and my throat closed with fear, but I forced myself to relax. My dad was better now, but that didn’t stop me from fearing him. It would take time for me to completely be okay around him again, but I was going to do my best, because I wasn’t lying when I told him I wanted us to move forward. He was my dad after all. “When did you get so grown up?” He asked me, his mouth tilted down sadly. “Where’d my little girl go?”