Scandal (Tainted #1) (8 page)

‘Why?’ Sebastian looked more like she’d just told him she didn’t like ice cream than she didn’t want a vibrator.

‘Because it’s … it’s …’ She couldn’t hold eye contact as a wave of mortification washed through her. ‘Inappropriate.’

‘To who? There’s nothing wrong with having this. It’s kinda hot, actually. Don’t all women have one?’

Her mouth opened but no words came. Maybe if she squeezed her eyes shut and wished really hard, time would go back and she could pick out a pair of decent shoes so Sebastian wouldn’t have to come in here and find … that.

Alicia tried again. ‘Not women like me.’

Watching Alicia kneel in front of him, unable to meet his eyes, made Sebastian wish he’d toned down the teasing. Her parents had obviously been way too uptight, making their daughter too embarrassed to even want something as basic as pleasure. It pissed him off that someone as fiery as Alicia could be was forced to stifle all that passion.

Though he suspected there was more to it. Growing up in the home of an earl with a reputation as clean as a whistle meant he either had deep enough pockets to buy silence, or was ruthlessly strict with his family. Part of him wished it was the former. The thought of a younger Alicia having to deal with her father’s wrath didn’t sit right with him.

‘Come on.’ He got to his feet and held out his hand.

She frowned at him. ‘Sebastian, I don’t feel like going out.’

‘How about some Dutch courage and a takeaway instead?’ Her eyes widened and some of the pink seeped out of her face. ‘We can work on the press release. What you have is great, but you don’t have all the details of how we met hammered out. I can help with dates.’

‘Um …’

He took her arms and pulled her up. Alicia stumbled closer and he wrapped his arms around her for support. Not the wisest move, considering her hips now pressed flush to his, spiking his blood flow with a shot of arousal.

‘It’s fine. You don’t have to be embarrassed. I’m the one who’s slept with half the female population, remember?’

A smile twitched up the corners of her lips. ‘In your dreams, maybe.’

Stepping back to regain a little control, he slapped a hand over his heart. ‘You wound me.’

‘I’ve a feeling it would take more than that to put a dent in your ego,’ she said, her grin widening and her shoulders relaxing.

Sebastian didn’t mind letting his ego be the focus of teasing if it helped her get over him finding the unwanted gift. ‘You’ve caught me.’

He pulled his mobile out, then tugged her close to his side.

‘What are you doing?’ she asked.

Loading up the camera, he said, ‘We need to let the world get used to us together, don’t we?
I
know we’re staying home but no one else has to know. Instagram will fix that.’

She frowned as the front camera came on and captured their heads. ‘But –’

‘Say cheese,’ he said, then snapped the photo.

He entered the caption:
Finally get to take my stunning girlfriend, @AliciaSimpson out for dinner. #GoodTimes,
then hit send.

‘Sebastian, I wasn’t ready,’ she protested.

He showed her the picture and said, ‘You’re beautiful, don’t worry. Now where do you keep the takeaway menus?’

Mai flicked through the pages of her diary from the previous year. What started so great, so beautiful, had ended so cruelly that she sometimes wished Sebastian would come down with something awful – like malaria.

Other times, like tonight, she just felt sad and unloved.

Skipping to February, she remembered her birthday. Sebastian had trained so hard for almost a month. She’d barely seen him. He’d taken the fourteenth off, arranged for them to fly to Paris that morning, and they’d had a very romantic dinner with the Eiffel Tower in full view. The champagne flowed all night and when dessert came, she found the seven-carat diamond ring that had given her hope that things would get better between them.

She’d realised then that she was adored, cared for. He’d shown her just how much, telling her how beautiful she was, but she knew he was just being nice – the winter had taken her up a dress size and she hadn’t been feeling great about her new size ten figure.

But that night in Paris, she’d forgotten her worries as he’d made her feel sexy, loved, and like the only person in his world.

A tear dripped onto the paper and she wiped her eyes, not wanting to ruin the ink that described her last perfect day. After all, she’d only agreed to marry him for financial security – something she’d never had growing up in different foster homes around the UK. Plus, she had liked the attention, the way he treated her like she was precious. She couldn’t remember a time she’d felt that cared for. Maybe if her mother hadn’t been a smackhead she would have been cherished growing up, and would have seen Sebastian’s bullshit for what it was sooner. A scheme used by men who thought they could stick their dick in anything that moved, no matter who was at home waiting for them to return.

Mai slammed the diary shut with a shriek. Jack was the man she needed. Someone who loved her for who she was and always would. She should start appreciating him more. After all, who took her back after she left him when Sebastian seduced her into false security?

Jack wouldn’t have led her on, made her care about him, and then dropped her so hard the bones in her legs shattered. Jack wouldn’t do that at all.

She heard the front door of the house open and glanced at the clock. It wasn’t anywhere near his local pub’s closing time, but he was back, and she was going to show him exactly how much she appreciated him.

After hiding her diary in the cabinet next to the bed, she stripped, letting her clothes fall to the floor. He was in the doorway before she’d taken a step and the gleam in his blue eyes along with the way he swayed a little told her he’d had a good few drinks, but not too much to not make love to her.

Mai sat down on the bed with her legs open, her gaze never leaving his.

‘You gonna let me fuck you hard, babe?’ he asked, his words a little slurred.

Anticipation throbbed in her pulse points. Passion was uncontrolled, and that’s exactly how a man who was crazy about her should make love to her. None of that slow, sensual shit she got with Sebastian.

‘Hard as you like. If it’s not rough it isn’t fun, right?’ So said Lady Gaga, anyway.

Jack pulled off his coat then unzipped his jeans. He didn’t take them off, just pulled his cock through the zip. She frowned, seeing she had her work cut out for her. It was always like this to start with. She’d have to blow him first just to get it hard enough to enjoy.

When he came closer though, she tipped her chin and let him shove it into her mouth. With impatience making her clit throb harder, Mai went to work like a Dyson, bobbing her head and moaning like having his dick in her mouth was the most erotic thing she’d ever experienced. It worked: in minutes he grew enough that he was thrusting into her throat, past her protesting gag reflex.

When her eyes started to stream, she pushed at his hips until he pulled out. ‘I want you to make love to me now.’

He pulled her off the bed, turned her around, and wrapped an arm around her lower stomach. She bent over to give him better access, propping herself up on the bed and made a strangled noise when he pounded into her like he couldn’t wait another second.

That was just the beginning. Jack swung his hips wildly, screwing into her over and over again. She could feel the pressure building at her core, the delicious swirl of heat gathering between her legs. The sting on her ass from where his skin slapped into hers only heightened the sensations.

Fisting his hands in the hair at her nape so hard her eyes watered again, he pulled her back onto his cock over and over again. She loved it when he got all ferocious and powerful in bed. Sure, she’d hurt for days but the orgasm steadily building would keep her going for longer.

Since he was holding most of her weight she reached a hand toward her clit, but he slapped it away.

‘You’ll come on my cock with
just my cock.
’ His growl was what did it.

She tumbled over the edge as a full-blown orgasm pulsed through her. It was so epic she barely felt him withdraw, but she
did
feel it when his dick breached her anus.

Mai couldn’t help it. She acted on reaction and tensed her muscles. That only made the discomfort at being penetrated hurt more, but Jack pounded away, seemingly oblivious to her pain. She gritted her teeth, resolved to do this for him after what he’d given her. After everything he’d done for her, how could she not?

But silent tears streamed down her face as his thrusts became harder and harder. The way he was holding her hair hurt instead of heightening her pleasure. A moan escaped her throat but Jack mistook the reason.

‘You love this, babe, don’t you? You love me in your arse.’

She couldn’t reply, not without releasing a sob. Instead she tried to relax. When his thrusts got so fast and the agony so severe she thought he might have ripped her insides, she was about to scream.

But one last jerk of hips was all it took for him to go over the edge. The shudder that racked through him told her he’d found his pleasure, then he pulled out. Collapsing onto the bed, she kept her face away so he wouldn’t see the dampness on her cheeks.

She heard him undress, then he was in bed beside her. Normally she’d curl up next to him, but there seemed to be a canyon between their bodies and she was raw, physically and emotionally.

Jack built a bridge across the distance and pulled her close. She stiffened in his arms, then ran a few curses through her head. What was she doing? This was the love of her life, not some bastard stranger.

‘Babe, you OK?’ he asked.

Tears turned into sobs that racked through her. Jack gasped, pulled her around, and she could see the pleasure ebb from his expression as shock took its place.

‘I hurt you?’

She nodded. ‘I wasn’t ready … I didn’t …’

Cursing, he pulled her into a hug. She melted into him and cried into his neck, probably ruining the shirt he’d left on to sleep in. Today had been too emotional, too much to handle, but with him holding her like this – like Sebastian used to – she felt protected.

‘I’m so sorry.’ Though his words were slurred, the sincerity was there.

‘I know, babe,’ she said between sobs. ‘I’m sorry too. For everything.’

Chapter Six

Alicia sat at the opposite end of the sofa from Sebastian with a stiff spine and her chin in the air, showing what little dignity she had left. Still, with every sip of wine she had waiting for their Italian takeaway to arrive, her inhibitions were loosening and the last of the embarrassment was seeping away.

Sebastian may be right, women might own toys for their own personal pleasure, but she never had. Not until Sylvia had picked one up at a charity evening at work to give Alicia as a gift. Daria received one too, a little less gauche and scary-looking. Until now, it had been thrown in the wardrobe and forgotten about.

The new Alicia didn’t use things like that – and neither had the old Alicia.

‘Earth to Blondie, you there?’

Sebastian’s voice had her head doing a one-eighty. He’d removed the suit jacket and tie, rolled up his sleeves to reveal tanned forearms, and was lounging on her sofa with the computer in his lap, looking more at home than she felt.

‘Sorry, I spaced out.’

He didn’t comment, but she could sense the cogs working in that beautiful head of his.

‘Scoot over and have a read,’ he said.

After placing her glass on the side table, she did just that, careful to keep some space between them. Sebastian had refused a drink since he was training and now it looked like he was refusing that space she’d kept between them as he shifted so close their sides touched.

‘We don’t have much to work with since I was pictured a few weeks ago.’

She focused on his changes to the press release rather than worry about the stab of jealousy at his reminder. Still, she remembered the pictures well. One in particular. The brunette and redhead he’d spent a night with might as well have been glued to him in that bar. It was the day he’d flunked out of the Australian Open, and instead of keeping a low profile, he’d been caught up in a threesome scandal that AIG had vehemently denied.

‘Looks good to me.’ She found it hard to force enthusiasm into her voice. Her father was right. She’d look like one more notch on a bed that was probably whittled away to a toothpick.

‘Look, for what it’s worth, nothing happened.’ Sincerity shone from his dark eyes.

‘Excuse me?’

He worked his jaw, glanced at the screen then blew out a breath. ‘That night in Melbourne with those women. I got too drunk to do more than pass out on the hotel bed. No one came back to my room with me.’

Her throat dried up and she reached for the wine. That would make sense. He’d pretty much messed up his career, which would be enough incentive to drive anyone to drink to forget for a while. Wine had been her friend time and time again when she didn’t want to deal.

Worse, she believed him, and she really didn’t want to believe him. It was better when he was the womanising pig she’d thought he was. ‘Why are you telling me this?’

He shrugged. ‘I get it looks bad for you to be dating me after all that happened, but I wanted you to know that I didn’t just hop out of their bed.’

A flutter assaulted her chest as cool fear lined her stomach. She didn’t know whether he was flirting or making it clear if she gave into how she felt around him then she wouldn’t be taking the twins’ sloppy seconds. And he had to know she wanted him – the evidence almost had his eyes out earlier.

Not for the first time, she looked at his mouth. Those ever-smiling lips set at the peak of his squared jaw were relaxed now. Maybe even soft. Rule one flashed into her mind but it wasn’t enough to stop her – especially when the thought of breaking it sent a thrill through her.

Sebastian leaned closer and picked up a lock of her hair, just above her breast, and she swayed forward, unable to take her gaze off his mouth. Blood rushed through her veins, making her mind fuzzy. Or maybe that was the wine. All she knew was it had been so long since a fire had burned at her core longing to be fulfilled, and he hadn’t even touched her yet.