Searching For Captain Wentworth (40 page)

I couldn’t
listen any longer. ‘Forgive me, Mr Glanville, but it
would not be seemly for me to remain under such
circumstances. I
cannot be detained
by you for a moment longer!’

Pushing the sofa
back with all my force I leapt to my feet
running towards the door before he could reach me.
Catching a
glimpse of his
shocked expression, as I closed the door on him, I
knew I’d had a lucky escape though I was sure it
would only be a
matter of time
before he declared his “intentions” again. And if he
applied to Mr Elliot or Mrs Randall for their
assistance, I knew all
my
efforts would be in vain. What was I to do? I could only hope
that I’d put him off and prayed that the weather
might improve
giving us all an
opportunity to get out of the house and be occupied
with other things. In the meantime, I should make
sure I was never
alone again.
Knowing that he would not repeat such behaviour if
Emma was within earshot, I stuck close by her
whenever I could.
Occasionally, I
found him staring at me in the way he had when
we’d first arrived, but by glaring at him I managed
to keep control
of the
situation.

Daily life at
Lyme followed a regular pattern of days out if the
weather was fine and days of imprisonment in the
house when it
was wet. Time
passed surprisingly quickly and June was heralded
in with a blast of heat, fine weather and dips in
the sea to cool off.
Despite
the annoyance of spending almost every moment avoiding
Mr Glanville and the illicit pleasure of dreaming
of Charles, for the
most part I was
finding that the days passed pleasantly enough.

Excursions,
which didn’t include the men in our party, were my
escape. Miss Rockingham came along on some of these
outings
and we enjoyed
rides in her donkey cart to Colyton and Charmouth,
taking long walks to Pinny where I thought of Jane.
I couldn’t help
but wonder if
she’d spoken so fondly of the area because she
herself had walked amongst its dramatic landscape
with someone
very dear to her
heart. I could see how easily you might fall in love
in such a place and I found myself hoping that Jane
and her young
man had been
able to see more of one another in Bath. I pictured
them strolling along the Gravel Walk, but decided
this was
probably a scene
that could only exist in one’s imagination, as I was
sure it had taken root in Jane’s. We’d exchanged a
few letters, but
there was no
mention of any gentleman, let alone secret trysts. She
hardly even mentioned Charles and I began to worry
that he had
forgotten all
about me. It was hard not to feel quite miserable at
times and I realized that the longer time went on;
my heart grew
fonder of him
than I ever thought possible. Telling myself I
shouldn’t feel that way was utterly hopeless. I’d
been in love with
him the first
time I’d ever set eyes on him and in a way it was a
relief to admit it to myself.

I was always the
first volunteer to go to the post office to
collect the letters and so it was in the third week
of June that
Marianne and I
escaped into town. I had a feeling there might be a
letter waiting for me and was excited to see I was
right. Waiting
until I had an
opportunity to read it by myself was going to take all
my patience, but the thought of news from Jane and
the possibility
of even the
smallest remark about Charles kept me going.

As we hurried
along Coombe Street, the wind picked up to
catch at our skirts and snatch at our bonnets. The
sky was turning
ominously grey.

‘Oh, do let us
find shelter,’cried Marianne, ‘or I shall get wet
through and catch another cold.’

We’d just turned
onto Broad Street when the first spots of
water were felt. The rain was nothing and I wanted
to get home as
quickly as we
could, but Marianne insisted on entering a coffee
shop, taking a table by the window and ordering for
us both.

I turned to my
letter as we waited for our refreshments to
arrive. The date on the top had been written a week
ago, but I
guessed the
postal service in this remote part of the country was not
as frequent as in the bigger towns. Jane’s letter
was full of news,
describing all
she’d seen and heard at the Pump Rooms and the
Assembly Rooms in humorous detail, as she always
did so well. I
couldn’t help
laughing out loud, until the next paragraph wiped the
smile off my face.

Charles is away
visiting friends for a few days and in his usual
style has sent no word of
his return. My mother is anxious that he
will change his mind about
accompanying us to Dorset, but I know
Charles will not let us
down. As you know, he’s always bubbling
with enthusiasm for all he
does and I know he will not want to miss
his trip to the coast. He’s
visiting some fellow sailors and I’m sure
they’re talking over past
times like old salts.

Well, dear
friend, I hope this letter finds you well.

Yours ever,

Jane.

Although Jane
had tried to be reassuring, the thought that
Charles might decide to stay with his friends and
not come to
Dorset after all
really bothered me. I wondered where in the
country he might be and imagined him being caught
up in the
entertainments
of private parties and balls, most likely at a country
house. Perhaps his friends were brothers to a bevy
of beautiful
sisters and
maybe Charles was looking forward to dancing with
them. I knew I was getting carried away, but I
couldn’t help myself.

I was gazing at
the bustling scene outside feeling as miserable
as the weather looked. The rain was really coming
down now
bouncing off the
cobbles and dripping from the eaves of the shops
and houses. Dashing figures hoisting umbrellas
tried fruitlessly to
dodge the
rain and rushed for cover. And then I saw him. As I
stared, I was suddenly fixated by one particular
figure.

He was instantly
recognizable. Charles Austen was walking down
the street! My first instinct was to completely
disbelieve what I was
seeing;
thinking that I’d seen the man from the Cobb again, but
there was no doubt. It was Charles; this time I
wasn’t wrong. My
reaction was
overwhelming, my heart began to pound and a million
butterflies flitted inside. It was such a shock. I
felt overpowered
with love. For a
few moments I saw nothing; I was lost until I
scolded myself into being sensible once more,
suddenly aware that
Marianne was
talking to me. But, I couldn’t think about anyone
else, I really wanted to go to the door. It seemed
desperately
important to
check if the rain was stopping. Why was I to suspect
myself of any other motive? Surely Charles must be
out of sight by
now.

I left my seat
and told myself that my reasons for doing so
were perfectly innocent and justifiable. After all,
we’d soon be
making our way
home. But, just as I got to the door, Charles was
there; he practically walked into me. He was
obviously really
surprised to see
me, more than I expected, for he looked quite conscious and his cheeks were
pink. For the first time since I’d met
him, I felt that I was showing less emotion. I’d had the advantage
of seeing him first; I’d been able to prepare
myself. Still, I felt such
a
desperate mixture of anxiety and pleasure, something between
joy and anguish.

‘Miss Elliot, it
is a pleasure to see you.’ Charles didn’t seem
able to look at me and yet, I sensed that his words
were heartfelt.

‘It is my
delight, Lieutenant Austen, that you are here in
Lyme. Are you with your family?’

‘No, that is,
they are expected in a day or two. I’ve been
visiting friends and as my mother was becoming
anxious that I
might never
rejoin them, I thought I’d restore her faith by riding on
ahead to secure accommodation for us all. My mother
wishes to be
at Dawlish this
year for part of her summer tour. I came on to look
around the area to find a suitable house and had a
fancy to stop in
Lyme on the
way.’

‘Oh, I see. Then
you will not be staying long.’

I couldn’t stop
smiling, nor could I take my eyes from his
face. I didn’t want to think about the short time
we would have
together, or the
fact that this might be the only chance I would have
to speak to him. I just wanted to drink in the
image of his handsome
face and
lose myself in those hazel eyes, which now turned to look
into mine. I was suddenly conscious that Marianne
was watching
us closely.

‘Lieutenant
Austen, may I present my sister, Miss Marianne
Elliot.’

‘How do you do,
Miss Marianne? How are you enjoying your
visit?’

‘It is as I
expected, Lieutenant Austen. The weather is too dull
for words and my sister is only intent on making me
sketch or
climb steps.
Lyme has too many inclinations for my liking and too
much wind to make any sitting outdoors
pleasurable.’

‘Oh dear, I am
sorry to hear that,’ said Charles, barely able to
disguise a smile. ‘We shall have to find something
to improve on
your experiences
thus far. I wonder; do you care for violet drops,
Miss Marianne? For myself, I always find sweet
treats a most
agreeable
diversion.’

Charles took a
small black and white striped box from his
pocket and proffered the contents to Marianne. She
was unable to
resist the
sweets and when she’d sampled one and declared it to her
liking, Charles made her a present of the rest.

‘I think the
rain is stopping,’ Marianne called, ‘we should be
going home now, Sophia.’

‘There is to be
a dance at the Assembly Rooms this evening,’
said Charles urgently. ‘I will be attending, I do
hope you and your
party will be
there.’

‘I do not yet
know of our plans, but I hope we will be in
attendance.’

‘I hope very
much to see you there, Miss Elliot.’

‘Well, I think
we should be leaving now.’

‘But, it is
raining.’

‘Oh, very
little, it’s just a shower.’

‘I have an
umbrella, I wish you would make use of it, if you
are determined to walk.’

As I hesitated,
a carriage drew up outside; the servant came in
to announce Mr Glanville before he made an
appearance. It was
beginning to
rain again, though no one inside took any notice of the
weather being far too interested in watching what
was going on.

William
Glanville was talking as loudly as he could, making sure
that everyone in the shop knew that he was calling
to take the Miss
Elliots home. He
had stopped in every shop along Broad Street, he
said, in order to find us. Charles Austen clearly
recognized him as
the man he’d
seen in our party at Bath. Mr Glanville ignored him
and made much of me, anxious to get us away. In
another moment
he had taken my
arm. I flashed an embarrassed look at Charles but
only managed to whisper goodbye as we passed away
through the
door and into
the carriage.

Going over our
meeting in my mind on the way home, I felt
myself analyze every gesture, every word that
Charles had said. I
hardly heard
anything that Mr Glanville was saying until he
announced that after an early dinner we should be
attending the ball at the Assembly Rooms, and it was almost impossible not to
give
him the impression that my
enthusiasm arose from this information
alone. I knew my face had lit up at the very mention of going to the
ball, but all I could see in my mind’s eye was
Charles. And, as
much as I would
have liked to keep my feelings hidden, it was
impossible. Mr Glanville’s hints about wanting to
open the ball
with the Elliot
sisters at his side gave me several minutes of
anxiety. All I could pray was that he would ask
Emma to dance
first. I knew
that he would be asked by local dignitaries to lead the
dancers out onto the floor and that if I was chosen
to be his first
partner, this
would signify a certain preference for my company. I
didn’t want this to happen above everything else.