Seasons of Fate (5 page)

  
‘I would love to meet the right person, somebody I could trust with all of me, including the broken parts, but most of all they would have to love Lily, like she was their own. I’m just not sure that it’s on the cards for me, I mean I wouldn’t have a clue where to start and I’m not sure I would want anybody to come near me and see how disgusting I am.’ His eyes bulged and his frown seemed to radiate anger.

  
‘I can’t believe you said that, is that….is that really what you think of yourself? You’re…. amazing Summer, your kind, funny, loving and very beautiful, any man would be happy to have you, can’t you see that?’

I didn
’t respond, I couldn’t, nobody had ever said anything like that to me before, and I was speechless. I don’t think he realised how happy he made me just by saying those words.  After that we finished the movie and Mason got up to leave, as usual he said goodbye by the door and again kissed my cheek, but seemed to linger, he looked at my lips, just staring at them before turning and walking away. I stood there a moment before locking up and going to bed but I was restless thinking about everything we had talked about, my mind just churned everything around and around and it wasn’t until hours later that I finally drifted off, only to have the most incredible dream I had ever experienced, unfortunately when I woke up most of it was a blur, they only thing I truly remember was a feeling of being hot and horny. For the first time in my life I felt dizzy with a feeling I had never experienced before, Lust.

   After breakfast I decided to get ready so we could go out, I had recovered nicely but was now ready to finally take a walk and rekindle my love of everything New York, before leaving however the hotel phone rang, John answered it and seemed surprised at the caller.

  
‘Its Mason, he wants to talk to you sweetie.’ I wondered why he hadn’t just dropped by, I assumed it was something about our talk last night but couldn’t be sure.

  
‘Hello, Mason, is everything alright?’

  
‘Hi Summer, I’m really sorry, I had hoped to see you in person. I’ve been called away for work so I’m afraid I won’t see you for a few days.’

Oh I thought, ok, I hope it isn
’t me.

  
‘I hope it’s nothing serious? Never mind it can’t be helped, I mean you’ve been here for weeks, I’m sure you need to get back to work. Thank you for calling, but don’t worry. We’ll just see you when you return, I hope that’s before we leave for the UK.’ My stomach was in knots, I felt like somebody had crawled inside and taken a chunk of me, it was a horrible feeling and I couldn’t understand it. What the hell was happening to me?

  
‘I won’t be gone long, its nothing serious, its just I have to be there in person to handle it, I’m sorry I really don’t want to leave you like this but I have no choice.’

Ok so at this point I thought I may burst into tears but held back because my best friends and daughter were sitting right behind me, so I just said

   ‘It’s fine really, no big deal. Take care, bye….bye Mason.’ And with those final words I hung up. I let everybody know we would be leaving soon and walked to my room. Lys came into my bedroom and closed the door, I knew she would want to know what was happening but I wasn’t sure I could explain without giving way to some of the feelings that I was holding back,

  
‘What’s wrong? What did Mason say?’ Here goes, I thought.

  
‘He’s been called away for work and wanted to apologise for not telling me in person, that’s all.’

  
‘That’s all huh, so why do you look like somebody just ran you over, yea right, that’s all. When will you admit that you have feelings for Mason and he feels something for you too.’ What, no way

  
’That’s absurd, he’s just a friend, he wouldn’t want me, who would. I have a ton of baggage and a four year old child. Nobody would want to get involved with that, its not exactly desirable, plus I have no clue what to do with a guy, especially somebody who looks like him. He would be very disappointed and trust me, seeing me naked is not a good idea’

  
‘What the hell hun, the right person won’t care about that shit, he will want you for you, regardless of baggage. You need to have faith, what’s the point in this life if we have no faith that something better is out there for each of us.’ She had a good point but I would need to really think about this before I made a huge mistake.

  
‘I get it ok, I just need some time to really sort all this crap going through my head.’

  
‘Ok but next time you have an amazing sex dream you need to tell me all about it.’ She laughed at the look on my face but I was stunned

  
‘You heard me, Oh my God, I can’t believe you heard me, did John hear?’

  
‘No don’t worry just me and I have to say, I’m so jealous right now. I wish I could dream about that stuff, but it’s just the usual shit. So what was the dream about and what dirty things were you doing with Mason?’

  
‘How do you know I was dreaming about him?’ Lys had an ‘are you kidding me look’ on her face so I just gave up trying. ‘I think it was him but its not clear, all I remember for sure was feeling like I couldn’t get enough and I woke up feeling, uh…feeling horny, which I can guarantee has never happened to me before. Hello, I mean twenty five and no orgasms for me, so I feel a bit odd even thinking about this stuff so soon after everything that’s happened.’

  
‘Oh come on, its not weird, you’re a young woman with wants and desires, your past hasn’t hindered that, your just in the position now to do something about it.‘

She laughed and I laughed along with her. It was a nice feeling to have a normal talk with my best friend about guys and sex, even though neither of us was experienced with either in a normal sense, being forced kind of turns off the impulse to feel sexy, so I guess if and when I decide to have sex it will be like the first time, how it should have been I suppose.

   The next couple of days went by, and my mood went down a dark hole, John and Lys did their best to cheer me up and also make sure Lily was happy but I couldn
’t seem to lift myself from the strange funk I was in.

   While we were watching TV the following week, a knock at the door made my heart jump in my chest, but it sank just as quickly when the person stood there wasn
’t a tall dark sexy guy with blue eyes but, the hotels concierge handing me a package.

  
’This just came in Ms Clarke, with strict instructions to hand it to you personally, oh and here’s the accompanying note. Sorry to have disturbed you.’

  
‘Not at all, thank you.’ What the hell, nobody knew where we were so who was sending me a package, I opened the note, and read

Summer,

      I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch sooner but, I have been bombarded with work. I really want to talk to you but thought it would be easier to keep in touch if I could get a hold of you at any time, so your gift should help with that. Sorry if it’s presumptuous but I kind of hoped you would want to talk. Its all ready for you, you just need to turn it on, and feel free to use it whenever you want. I’m hoping to be back by the weekend, it’s longer than I had planned but I’m hoping to spend more time in New York, so it was necessary. Say hi to John, and Lys, and give Lily a big hug from me. See you soon.

Mason.

P.S

I miss you.

   Wow, I had to re read his note over and over before I could open the package which as suspected was a brand new phone, with everything included. Lys gushed over his gift, John just had an ‘I told you so’ look on his face and Lily just thought it was awesome, I gave her a big hug from Mason and decided to see what else was on the phone. Mason seemed to know me too well already, making sure the phone included contacts for the local hospital, chemist, Cab Company, and the best take away restaurants in the local area. He had also loaded his cell number, his office number and numbers for his home in LA, and here in New York. He had thought about me this whole time, how sweet. I really needed to do something for him but what? John showed me how to use the apps and also how to send an e mail and text, so I decided a text was in order.

Mason

I cant believe you got me such an expensive gift it
’s too much, but thank you, and yea I would love to talk to you, I’m missing our time together. Please text me back or call whenever, it will be nice to hear your voice. The guys say hi, and Lily sends hugs your way. Take care.  Summer xx

I sent the text and waited for a response, which came so quickly I didn’t get time to put the phone down.

Summer

You don
’t need to thank me, it was for me as much as for you, I’m sat in a meeting bored out of my mind and the only thing keeping me going is the thought of talking to you. If you’re not busy tonight I’ll call so you can keep me up to date with

everything you
’ve been up to. Until then, Mason xxxx

Wow he’s texting me while he’s in a meeting, he must be bored, laughing out loud I walked into the other room where Lily was playing with a puzzle John had bought her, she said

  
’Mummy when is Mason coming back?’ Strange what she picks up on

  
‘He’s hoping to come back by this weekend, why sweetie?’

  
‘I miss him, he’s fun and he’s always nice to me, do you like him mummy? Is he our new friend?’ Oh God, what do I say to that, the truth I suppose?

  
‘Yeah he’s our new friend, do you like him baby?’ She looked up at me and gave me the most honest answer she could

  
‘Yeah, I love him, he loves me too, I can tell, and I know that he loves you because I heard Auntie Lys and Uncle John talking about it.’

What.The.Fuck, were the only words that came to mind, how could they talk about this stuff in Lily
’s listening range. I think a talk was required so I sent Lily to wash up and walked back into the lounge.

  
‘What have you guys been saying in front of Lily? She has it in her mind that Mason loves me, what were you both thinking? We don’t even know him, please don’t give her that hope, its wrong.’

My eyesight started to blur without my consent before I walked away. What did my friends see that I couldn
’t, was I really not seeing him, or was I just afraid to give way to my feelings and not have them returned, fuck knows. We didn’t talk about it again, I think Lys understood that I was confused by my feelings and worried about Mason’s impact on our lives.

   That night while I was in my room, my phone rang and I quickly picked it up and answered ‘Hello’

  
‘Hey it’s me, told you I would call. Wow it’s so nice to hear your voice, how are you doing?’ Oh God, just hearing his voice made me smile

  
‘I’m good, just a bit tired but I didn’t want to miss your call. How was your meeting?’

  
‘As expected, the usual stuff, negotiations, etc, if you’re tired I can call back tomorrow?’

  
‘No…. I’m fine really. To tell you the truth, I’m kind of glad to hear your voice, it seems like an age since you left. I miss our movie nights.’ Laughing I felt a sigh of relief.

  
‘Yeah me too. I can’t wait to get back. Actually I wanted to ask you something. My family has been bugging me to visit so I wondered whether you and Lily would like to come with me. They wanted to meet the lady who saved me. No pressure or anything I just thought I would ask.’ He went quiet then.

  
‘Can I think about it and decide when you get back?’

  
‘Of course, thank you. To tell you the truth they are dying to meet you and of course my mom cant wait to meet Lily, I kind of told them all about you guys,’ My intake of breath must have been louder that I thought because he was quick to continue

  
‘Not everything, that’s private and I would never betray your trust like that. What you decide to share is your business, but I would very much like you to meet my family.’

  
‘Thanks, I will think about it.’

Mason seemed to hear my reluctance but didn
’t voice it, we talked for a while longer before my yawn sounded loud and clear over the line and Mason decided to let me go.

  
‘Goodnight Summer, sweet dreams.’

  
‘Goodnight Mason.’

   The next couple of nights we went to bed early, exhausted from our longs days of walking around the city, but once again my dreams were filled with all things Mason, it was exciting and erotic, at least that’s what I imagined it to be like, not even my inexperienced mind could stop these amazing feelings from penetrating my subconscious. I knew one thing for sure, I was so screwed.