Second Time Around (24 page)

Unlike Friday, Quinn rode beside her with Zack’s pony on his other side. While the two chatted away, she unabashedly admired her husband, aware of the change in attitude she’d undergone since yesterday. When she’d told him last night that it was time she trusted him, she’d meant it. And the relief that had come with her decision had been too enormous for words.

Part of her wondered if she were only seeing what she wanted to see, fooling herself into believing he’d stay. But he had promised her, and she couldn’t stop herself from thinking he meant it this time. As soon as she got back from Jared’s, she’d tell Quinn that she wanted to make their trial marriage a real one.

The thought of Jared made her nibble her bottom lip, and tension edged its way back into her muscles. She dreaded the meeting with him, telling him it was over between them. Hurting him was the last thing she wanted, yet there was no way around it. Maybe he didn’t have her love, but he deserved her honesty.

“What’s the frown for?”

She glanced at Quinn then made herself smile. “Thinking about things I shouldn’t be thinking about on a beautiful day like today.”

It was true, in a way, she decided. There was one painful chore to get through, and then she and Quinn could start a new life together. They would finally be a real family.

Happiness welled inside her. Never again would she doubt Quinn. He was really going to stay on the ranch with her and Zack. And maybe there would be another baby soon. She went all soft thinking about it.

“If you don’t stop that, I’m going to be forced to drag you off the horse and make love to you right here in front of everyone.”

“Stop what?” Lanie blinked at him innocently.

“Looking like that.”

A laugh erupted from her lips. “That would sure give them their money’s worth.”

She shook her head. “As much as I normally love these trial rides, I’d like to get this one over with. Think we could coax them into a gallop?”

14“Unless they want to get left behind. After you.”

With a brief warning to those following her, Lanie urged her horse into a slow canter. There were a few squeals, but everyone seemed to be hanging on.

What was that saying? Today is the first day of the rest of your life. In her case, she felt it really was true.

14Chapter Twenty

Quinn slid from the horse with a feeling of relief when they reached the stable.

While his leg had improved amazingly, it was a little stiff after sleeping on the ground for two nights, and two long rides. He flexed it a bit, and saw Lanie watching him as she undid the girth on her saddle.

“Is it bothering you?”

“Not really. Just some tight muscles.”

“That’s bad enough. Why don’t you go take care of it? I’ll have one of the kids unsaddle your horse.”

His jaw clenched. “I’m not a damned invalid. I can handle my own horse.”

“I didn’t mean. . .” Her gaze clouded over. “I’m sorry. Of course you can. I was only worried about you.” She glanced at the people surrounding them. “We need to talk, Quinn. There’s something I have to tell you.”

A feeling of dread washed over him, leaving a hollow ache in his stomach.

Suddenly, he wasn’t too sure he wanted to hear what she had to say. What if she’d lied about trusting him, loving him? What if she’d made her choice and it was Harper?

He took a deep breath and nodded. “Now?”

“No, I’ve got too much to do this afternoon and I don’t want us to be interrupted.

How about tonight, after supper?”

“Okay.” His nervousness increased. He felt like a Thanksgiving turkey waiting for the axe to fall across his neck, and he knew the feeling would grow stronger before tonight.

Trying to remain calm, he finished unsaddling the horse and turned it out to the pasture. On his way back through the stable he stopped beside Lanie.

“Anything you need me to do?”

“Thanks, but it’s under control.” She smiled at him. “All that’s left is making sure everyone leaves with the right luggage.”

“Then I guess I’ll head for the house.”

“Okay.” To his surprise, she stood on her tiptoes and gave him a quick kiss. “I’ll see you later.”

Maybe he’d been wrong about why she wanted to talk to him. She certainly wasn’t acting like a woman about to dump her husband for another man.

His emotions wavered as he crossed the yard. He had to believe this would all turn out right. If he didn’t, if he didn’t trust that she loved him, he wouldn’t make it through the day.

14Duncan was standing at the kitchen counter slapping together some ham and cheese sandwiches when Quinn came through the door. “Want one?” He arched an eyebrow in question.

“No thanks. I’m still full from breakfast.” He got a cup from the cabinet and filled it with coffee before sitting at the table. “So, how’s it going with you and Sherry? You seemed pretty cozy last night.”

Duncan shrugged. “She’s nice.”

Quinn studied his back. “Why do I hear a ‘but’ in there?”

His friend slid the sandwiches onto a plate and carried them to the table, straddling the chair across from Quinn. For a moment he toyed with the food. “I don’t know, Quinn. I’m not sure I’m capable of having a real relationship anymore. Sherry is a friend, but that’s all she is.”

“Dunc, it’s been five years since Tracy died. You have to get on with your life.

Sherry may not be the woman you want to spend forever with, but that doesn’t mean you won’t find someone someday. At least, you will if you start looking.”

Duncan grimaced. “You make it sound like buying a new truck.”

Quinn laughed. “Well, you sure wouldn’t wait until the truck came to you, now would you?”

“I guess not.” He took a bite of sandwich then spoke around the food. “How’s it going with Lanie?”

Quinn’s smile turned into a frown. “I don’t know. One minute I think everything is wonderful, and the next I’m convinced it’s all but over. She said she wants to talk tonight and there’s only one reason I can come up with as to why.”

Before Duncan could respond, the door flew open and Zack carried a squirming pup inside.

“Dad, can I bring Spot in to play for a while?”

Daisy had finally weaned the pups and, with a steady diet of puppy chow, they had doubled in size the last few weeks. Even Spot, the runt of the litter, now sported long gangly legs that nearly touched the ground when Zack held him.

“What does your mom say?”

“She’s not here. She went to see Jared and she told me to stay with you until she gets back, so can I bring him inside?”

Quinn’s heart twisted, but he tried not to let it show. “If you promise to keep an eye on him and take him outside if he needs to go to the bathroom.”

“Yippee!” Zack dropped the pup to the floor and ran across the kitchen, Spot at his heels.

“Don’t jump to conclusions.”

14Quinn looked up at Duncan’s quiet words. “It’s hard not to. She’s obviously made up her mind. Her going to see Harper first doesn’t look good. Right now she’s probably telling him that by tomorrow I’ll be out of her life.”

“Or she could feel like she’s not free to make a life with you until she’s called it off with Harper. Give her a chance, Quinn.”

Tiredly, he ran a hand through his hair. “You’re right. But that doesn’t make the waiting any easier.”

The shrill ring of the phone interrupted him, and he waved Duncan back into his seat. “I’ll get it. You’re eating.”

* * * * *

Lanie pulled the truck to a stop at the end of Jared’s drive and shut off the motor. In spite of the bright sunlight, the scene was eerily similar to the last time she’d been here.

The only thing missing was Sara’s car.

Her feet felt like lead as she climbed out and started up the walk, and her palms were sweating. She’d made it up the stairs to the porch when she realized Jared was standing in the open doorway watching her.

“Come on in.”

Nervously, she stuck her hands in her pockets. Under the circumstances, the thought of being alone with him in the house made her uncomfortable. “If you don’t mind, could we take a walk instead?”

“If that’s what you want.” The smile he gave her was edged in sadness, but his voice was calm.

He knew, she realized. But that didn’t let her off the hook. She had to tell him herself.

They walked toward the grove of trees at the far side of the yard and Lanie cleared her throat. “How was your vacation?”

“Fine. I stayed on my brother’s boat and did a lot of thinking.”

“The one in Florida?”

“Yes.”

She nodded, then fell silent. God help her, she didn’t know how to do this. They reached the shady area, and she still couldn’t force the words out.

Almost as if he sensed her difficulty, Jared stopped. “Why don’t I go first?”

“Okay.” She leaned her back against a tree trunk and faced him.

“When I decided to become a vet, I knew it wasn’t going to be easy. My family couldn’t afford to help me pay for it, so I had to survive on loans and part-time jobs. By the time I finished I was up to my ears in debt. There was no way I could open my own clinic. So, for a year I worked with another vet. Almost every cent I made went toward 14the loans, and there wasn’t much left for rent or food. I knew that at the rate I was going I’d never get it all paid off.”

Lanie’s brow furrowed. Why was he telling her this? She’d expected him to talk about them.

Jared saw her puzzlement and smiled. “Bear with me a bit and you’ll understand.”

He lifted his gaze to the horizon and continued.

“One day, I got a phone call. This man told me he owned a clinic in a small town in Wyoming and they were desperate for a vet. He said he’d checked with the school I went to and they’d told him about me. And then he offered to pay off all my loans if I’d be willing to relocate and take over this clinic. He even knew of a house I could rent, a small ranch where I could treat larger animals if I wanted.”

He closed his eyes briefly. “It sounded like a dream come true, but I told him I had to think about it. For the next few days I found out everything I could about this man, and he seemed legitimate. Not only was he rich, he owned a drug company that was listed in the Fortune Five Hundred.”

Horror curled through her as she stared at him. “Oh, my God,” she whispered.

“Edward.”

“Exactly.” His expression was grim. “I managed to convince myself that what he wanted was no different than the programs offered to medical doctors. The ones that forgive their loans if they work in small towns for a few years. That’s why I accepted. It wasn’t until the day I left that I found out he wanted more than a vet.”

He rubbed his forehead with one hand. “He said his ex-daughter-in-law and grandson lived in the area and he wanted me to keep an eye on them, to make sure they were okay and didn’t need anything. He said his son was pretty much a bastard who had gotten you pregnant then abandoned you. But I wasn’t supposed to let you know what I was doing because you wouldn’t accept help from him. Even then, I didn’t see anything wrong with his request. He just sounded like a lonely old man who wanted to make up for what his son had done, make sure his grandson was all right.”

His tone lowered and he touched her cheek. “What I didn’t count on was falling in love with you the first time I saw you. I thought I could check on this daughter-in-law occasionally and get on with my life. But you became my life, you and Zack.”

He shook his head as though to clear it and his hand sank to his side. “Over the last four years, I’ve sent him dozens of pictures of Zack, and even a video or two. When you decided to take a shot at a riding stable, Edward was the one who contacted the travel agency and had them call you. He’s even been paying their advertising fee for the ranch.”

She couldn’t believe what he was telling her. Shock after shock rippled across her mind. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I was in love with you, and scared to death you’d hate me if you found out. I knew you’d think I’d only been pretending so I could get closer to you. Besides, it all seemed perfectly natural. Until Quinn showed up.”

14He sighed. “That’s when Edward’s calls increased, and he started making more demands on me. He wanted to know every move you both made. There hasn’t been a day gone by that he hasn’t called wanting information. Until last Sunday, he was driving me out of my mind.”

If she hadn’t been leaning against the tree, Lanie was pretty sure she would have fallen. Her knees were too shaky to support her weight. “What happened last Sunday?”

she whispered.

“I called Edward and told him it was over, that he could find himself a new spy.

And I told him what he could do with the clinic. If it takes the rest of my life, I’m going to pay him back every cent of my loans.”

Her head was spinning, but there was one more thing she had to know. “That Saturday at the food court when you said McAllister warned you, you were talking about Edward, not Quinn.”

“Yes. He kept telling me if I didn’t want to lose you, I’d better not leave you alone with Quinn.” The sadness was back in his smile. “But I lost you the minute he came back, didn’t I, Lanie? I think I knew it the first time I met him. He was nothing like Edward had led me to believe.”

Tears filled her eyes as she gazed at him. He was so handsome, so dear. And she was going to hurt him so badly. “I’m sorry, Jared. This is all my fault. I know now that I never loved you the way I should have, and you deserve so much more from the woman you marry. You deserve to be the center of her world. Even if Quinn hadn’t come back, it would have been a mistake for us to get married.”

He used his thumb to brush away the moisture that spilled onto her cheek. “I’ve always known you still loved him, Lanie. I guess I thought if we were married I could make up for whatever was missing. But I was wrong. If we’d stayed married for a hundred years I still wouldn’t have been him. I finally realized that last week. And I love you too much to stand in your way.”

“Oh, Jared. You’ll find someone else to love, I promise.”

He shook his head and stepped away from her. “There will never be another woman for me, sweetheart.”