Secrets Of The Heart (Book 1, The Heart Series) (26 page)

She walked to him. Standing on tip-toe, she brushed a sweet kiss across his lips. When she pulled away he longed for more. “I’ll remember that, Sarge.”

She caressed her daughter’s rosy cheek, gaining a sigh and a murmured, “Mommy.”

“How’s my little sweetpea?”

Nick gently placed Sydney on the bed, and then tucked the covers around her little shoulders. “Worn out from all the packing she’s helped me with while you were working tonight.”

Putting his arm around Bree, he pulled her close, savoring the feel of her pressed to his side. When she dropped her head to his chest and pressed a hand to his middle, he thought he’d died and gone to heaven. Standing like that, Nick stared at the little girl.

“She’s so beautiful,” Bree whispered.

“Like her mother.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Come on, let’s go have some coffee and leave her to dreamland.”

“Wine would be better.”

“You’ve got it.”

A few minutes later, Nick brought a glass of red wine to Bree as she reclined in Nana’s favorite peach armchair in the sun room. Her fingers brushed his as she took the crystal stemware. A river of warmth flooded his bloodstream at the light caress.

“Thanks, Nick.” Her voice sounded breathy. She sipped at the ruby red liquid.

A restlessness invaded his middle at the matter he longed to broach. Normally, he’d work off the antsy sensation by lifting weights. But tonight he knew he must settle this here and now.

Discarding his own glass on the nearby table, he went from one wilting hanging potted plant to another. The fragrant bunch of flowers brought a rush of memories of his grandmother lovingly nurturing them.

A pang of remorse at his lack of attention to her beauties nudged him in his gut. Maybe with Bree’s help they could work to make them flourish again, but first… “I guess without Nana’s TLC these things won’t last too much longer.”

“Why is it I have a feeling you’re really not talking about her plants?” There seemed to be an anxious quality to her question as she placed her wine beside his untouched goblet.

He stopped fiddling with the long arm of an Ivy, and then turned to her. Smiling sheepishly because he’d been so transparent, he said, “Your instincts are pretty good, sweetness. I don’t want to poison what’s good between us, killing what we have because I’ve neglected digging deep inside myself for some answers.”

“And the lack of TLC relates to us not tending to the weeds in our hearts, is that it?”

“Man, you’re good!” Sighing, he made his way to the ottoman in front of her chair. Dropping down onto it, he faced her with his hands cupped between his knees and just inches from her legs. Her inquisitive expression prompted him to explain the one thing he still wrestled with. “I can’t stop thinking about what you said last week about the adoption.”

Not a muscle moved on her face, her expression remaining curious. But he swore she flinched inwardly. He didn’t know how he knew it. He just did.

“Go on.” Those two tightly spoken words said it all.

“I don’t know why I assumed you would hand over your daughter to me so I could have legal joint custody. In your shoes, I know I wouldn’t either.”

She took a deep, shaky breath. “So you understand my position then?”

Nodding, he said, “You’re not the only one holding back in this relationship, Bree. Based on my experiences with Dorthea I can’t trust any woman completely.”

She sat forward, clearly anxious to hear more. “Completely?”

Mere inches separated her from him now. He noted the change in her eye color form hazel to gray, telling him how concerned she was about the subject matter.

Raking a hand over his face, he measured his words. “Admittedly, on a fundamental level, there’s a thin element of mutual trust running between us.” At her skeptical look, he continued, “For you, you allow me, even welcome it on occasion, to influence the direction of Sydney’s life with my values, principles, and whatever else you see in me that you wish your daughter to learn.”

“You’re a good, decent man, Nick, of course I want you to teach her what you know, the difference between right and wrong, love…and everything else that makes you you.” She paused.

He held his breath.

“If I didn’t admire you as a man then why, on our honeymoon, would I have even brought up the subject of my wanting to have your baby, to give us both that precious gift?”

Shaken at her candor at her undying faith in him, Nick just stared at her for long, drawn out moments. “Wow! You sure know how to take me by surprise.”

Clearing the haze of heady emotion her words evoked, he went on trying to make his point. “Even when we were at out lowest points after Vinnie died, you still turned to me. When Sydney had to undergo a tonsillectomy last year I was the first one you called. And I know how much it cost you to ask me.”

“Beg you, is more like it,” she corrected, blinking back the moisture gathering at the corners of her now bluish gray eyes.

He allowed her that, sending her a lop-sided grin. “All right, when you begged me to come be with her the day she had to go into the hospital.”

Gently, she caressed his cheek with her silky soft palm. “You were so sweet, Nick. You insisted on picking us up and driving us there. You spent all morning holding her hand and talking through her fears. Then you stayed with me waiting anxiously for word. You don’t know how much that meant to me.”

Scowling at her, he asked, “What, did you think I’d just let you go through that silent torture by yourself?”

She shook her head vehemently. “Never! I guess I never doubted you’d be there even when she had to be admitted for observation after she threw up all that blood.”

Grabbing her hands in his, he absorbed the shiver of revulsion racking her at the horrible memory. Trying to release the fierce grip the past held, he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, “Hey, technically, that was the first night we ever spent together.”

Her chuckle warmed the cold regions that had gathered in his center. Sobering, she picked up on something he’d said a short time ago. “Between us? You mean you do trust me on some level?”

Withdrawing from her, he rubbed the back of his neck, trying to work out the knotted muscles. “This is going to be hard to explain. I’m not even sure I understand it fully myself.”

“Try.”

Sucking in a breath, he gathered his courage. “Part of trusting someone is if they keep their word. You do that. Call it honor or integrity, I don’t know, but a promise means something to you.”

“Thank you.”

He sucked in a deep, cleansing breath.

Stumbling over the swiftly forming thoughts tumbling through his head, Nick pressed on. “In my own way I depend on you, your presence in my life, believing that you won’t let me down.”

She swallowed hard. “I’m doing the best I can in that department.”

Was that a trace of fear he detected in her quivering voice? Sweeping it aside, he continued, “When Nana broke her hip, I automatically called you. All I had to say was, ‘I need your help’, and you dropped everything, rearranged your hours and appointments, and you were right by my side nursing Nana.”

“I loved her, too, Nick.” Tears clogged her voice and she sniffed them away.

Taking her hands in his once again, he raised them to his lips, depositing a kiss on the back of each one. “I know, sweetness. But you could have just come by to visit when time allowed instead of living through the worst of it: bathing her, helping her to the bathroom when she had too much dignity to use a bedpan, holding her as the pneumonia robbed her of breath, the way her body stopped working in slow degrees and you never waived, you never quit on her, talking to her into the wee hours of the morning when she had trouble sleeping, respecting her and Sydney enough to let them both come to terms with Nana’s impending death…”

This time when he looked at her, he watched the tears fall. His middle clenched. Gingerly, he wiped the trail of moisture away. “And after Nana died, you stepped in to help with the details of her funeral, alleviating the terrible burden of all the duties from my shoulders. I’d known, with an unshakable certainty, you would guide me through, and that I could depend on you.” He stopped, too filled with emotion to finish all that he’d hoped to share with her.

“You give me too much credit. I only did what I could to help her and you.” She locked gazes with him, a strong determination shone bright among the brilliant sparkle of tears. “You can depend on me, Nick. Whatever I do for you is strictly out of love. Trust me.”

Can I?
A small nugget of distrust still lingered. The repeated mysterious phone calls still unsettled him. He had the impression she knew more than she was letting on.

Last week her explanation had made perfect sense. But he’d held onto his lingering reservations, hoping Bree would exonerate herself.

Had she even contacted that woman yet?

A niggling doubt poked its way through his scrambling thoughts. If he asked her, would she be able to pass his final test? Or would she lie once again? “The phone calls still bother me, Bree.”

She dragged her hands away from his, sat back and hugged herself tightly. “Has there been more that I don’t know about?”

“None.” He swore the tension seeped out of her in one long, slow sigh. “Have you called the woman on the alumni committee?”

She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, a tiny droplet escaped to roll down her pale cheek. When she focused on him, a bleakness seemed to have taken up residence in her eyes, turning them dark and unfathomable. "I guess I’ve been avoiding telling you this since I came home. She returned my call tonight at the shop.”

The tension filled silence hung between them, stretching Nick’s nerves to unbearable lengths. The lack of Bree’s quick acknowledgment that this woman, or someone on her committee, had been the one making inquiries gave him two very opposite deductions and reactions. On one hand, the mystery still continued, making him more concerned. On the other hand, Bree wasn’t going to feed him lies; he could read it in her troubled expression. This last observation allowed hope to stir in his chest.

Softly, he asked, “She didn’t make them, right?”

Pressing her lips together, she shook her head. “In fact, some people on the committee have been subjected to the calls, too.”

Gently, he probed deeper. “Who do you suppose is trying to find you, sweetness?”

She buried her face in her hands for a long moment. When she finally dragged them to her mouth, cupping them there in a prayer like fashion, she searched his steady gaze. He ached for her tormented, frantic look. Fear crowded his gut.

Was someone trying to harm her?

The hairs on the back of Nick’s neck stood on end as he waited for her to respond. A ribbon of common sense slithered its way through his reeling mind. “You’ve suspected someone all along, haven’t you?”

“Yes,” she choked out.

All his muscles tightened involuntarily, ready to burst. “Who the hell is it, Bree?”

She took a ragged breath. “I think it could be an old…boyfriend.”

A knot formed in his gut, part jealousy, part disquiet. “Has he done this before? Is that why you think it’s him?”

With a trembling hand, she reached for her wine glass, and then drank deeply. After lowering the goblet, she swallowed hard several times before she looked at him. “I’m sorry, Nick. I know I should have told you before now but I’d hoped it was my high school trying to get in touch with me.”

“Tell me about this guy.”

She replaced the glass on the table, avoiding his stare and his demand. A shiver racked her body. “I can’t. It was so horrible. I don’t want to talk about him or anything else. Please, Nick, just hold me.”

Her woeful plea tore a hole through his heart. Standing, he pulled her into his arms. Gathering her close, he stroked her back as she trembled uncontrollably. Closing his eyes, he whispered into her hair, “It’s all right, sweetness, I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”

Dear God, what had this bastard done to her? I’m going to find out and keep him away from my wife
.

Her hot tears seeped through his shirt as she buried her face in his chest. “I feel so safe in your arms.”

“Because that’s where you belong. We’re a family, Bree, don’t ever forget that.”

And I finally know you’ll tell me the truth
.

Inwardly, Nick sensed a fracture shafting through the hard core of distrust he’d held onto for so long, cracking it wide open.

The broken shards ripped away, leaving him exposed and vulnerable.

He felt as if he’d just catapulted from a plane, free falling through air. A mixture of excitement and trepidation tingled in his veins.

He’d just taken the biggest risk of his entire life. Nick hoped he’d never regret it.

***

Bree plopped down onto the chair at the reception desk in the beauty salon. For days now, she lived in dread of Nick discovering her secret.

Longing for his trust, for an honest relationship with him, she’d nearly spilled everything last week, coming so damn close it wasn’t funny. She had to keep the rest bottled up inside her, even if she invented excuses just to keep Nick off the track.

Tessa shoved a can of soda at her. “Here, you look like you could use this. I’m afraid Jewel and I went through all the coffee we brewed this morning or else that’s what you’d get instead.”

Gratefully, Bree accepted, drinking the cold, refreshing bubbly cola. “Thanks, buddy, ol’ pal of mine.”

“Don’t mention it. I know when you come in here on your day off that something’s the matter. Is it Sydney being in kindergarten? You know, you haven’t been the same since her first day of school.”

Something tugged behind Bree’s heart. She missed her daughter, missed the time they spent together. The morning hours seemed to drag by without her smile, giggle, or even her funny little sayings.

Placing the metal can on the wooden desk produced a slight ping. “I suppose that’s why I’m a little down,” she admitted, refusing to go into details on her worries about Nick and her.