Secrets of the Heart (28 page)

“Well, hello,” she said with a smile. “It isn’t every lady who has
two
handsome men come to take her to supper.”

Tom grinned and looked down at Caleb. “Did you hear that, son? She thinks we’re both handsome.”

“Yeah, but I’m handsomer than you, Dad!”

Kathleen winked at Tom and said to the boy, “You’re just a smidgen handsomer than your father.”

Caleb laughed. “See there, Dad? I told you!” He turned back to Kathleen. “Ma’am?”

“Yes, Caleb?”

“What’s a smidgen?”

“A smidgen is a little bit.”

“Kathleen,” Tom said, “before we go to supper, there’s a young man here who would like to talk to you in private…at his request.”

Kathleen looked down at the fair-haired boy and said, “Come in, Caleb, and we’ll talk.”

“I’ll wait down in the lobby,” Tom said, turning to leave.

Kathleen gestured toward one of two overstuffed chairs. “Would you like to sit down, Caleb?”

“I would rather stand, ma’am, but I would like for you to sit down.”

“All right,” she said, easing into the chair. She looked him in the eye and smiled. “What did you want to talk to me about?”

“I owe you an apology, ma’am. I wasn’t very nice to you yesterday, and I’m sorry. I asked Dad to explain it to you, and I hope you understand about…about how I felt Mommy might feel if I showed love to you.”

“I understand completely, Caleb. I know you loved your mommy very much, and that’s what a boy
should do.
Please understand that I will never try to take her place in your heart. But if I could have my own place in your heart, it would make me very happy.”

Caleb nodded. “Ma’am, do you forgive me for not being nice to you yesterday?”

“Yes, I forgive you.”

A sunny smile broke across the little boy’s face. “Thank you, ma’am.”

“You’re a very good boy, Caleb. It took courage for you to talk to me like this—to say you were wrong and to ask forgiveness.”

His blue eyes watched her face closely as he said, “Ma’am?”

“Yes?”

“I didn’t hug you very good yesterday. Could I hug you good right now?”

Kathleen’s heart seemed to swell, and tears surfaced. “You sure can.”

This time Caleb hugged her with feeling. When they let go of each other, a shy but serious look settled in the child’s deep blue eyes. “Ma’am, you do have your very own place in my heart. I love you.”

Kathleen barely managed to speak past the lump in her throat. “Thank you, Caleb. Thank you! And you know what? You have a very special place in my heart, and I love you, too.”

When they embraced again, Kathleen thought of her little Meggie and how very much she missed her.

Tom took Kathleen to Maude’s Café for supper. It wasn’t a fancy place, but the food was excellent.

While they waited for their food, Kathleen said, “Tell me about mining, Tom. I know virtually nothing about it.”

It took about ten minutes for Tom to explain the functioning of a silver mine, which was quite similar to mining for gold, he pointed out.

When he had finished with the mechanics of it all she said, “How deep are you working in the mountain?”

“Oh…about three hundred feet.”

“Isn’t that dangerous?”

“Well, I can’t say there isn’t an element of danger, but it’s nothing for you to worry about. Mr. Comstock insists on a careful setup of the wooden beams that support the tunnels. Besides, when you and I get married, I’m going to start looking for a spot to stake a gold claim. Maybe when I work my own mine, I won’t have to work so deep in the ground.”

Kathleen thought of Peter and how quickly his life had been snuffed out. Becoming a widow the second time would be more than she could stand.

It was a glorious autumn day, with the sun slanting against the high Sierras to the west as Kathleen left the hotel and walked toward the Harned house on the east side of town.

This was her first day to meet Caleb at the house after school,
and she was excited. Not only had their talk the evening before removed the wall between them, but she knew she had this little boy’s love, and she would try her best not to disappoint him.

She basked in the golden sunshine beneath a clear and brilliant cobalt blue sky The deep green of pine trees accentuated the yellow of the shimmering aspen arid the red and russet of the maple and poplar trees. Scrub oak on the surrounding hillsides were yet a different shade of red-orange, and even the soft green of the sagebrush blended into the eye-catching palette of color.

Kathleen had left the hotel plenty early and took her time enjoying the beauty of her new hometown and its surroundings. The only mar on the landscape were the mines dug deep into the sides of the hills.

It was almost 3:05 when she arrived at the Harned house and stepped onto the porch. Tom had told her he never locked the house, and she was welcome to go inside and wait for Caleb. Though the air was crisp, it was invigorating. She decided to wait on the porch. She was also a little hesitant about going inside the house when Tom and Caleb weren’t there, though she knew when the cold weather came, she would have to do so. Of course, maybe they would be married by then.

There were two rocking chairs on the porch. Kathleen sat down in the one closest to the porch steps and let her eyes roam up and down the street. It was a nice neighborhood, and very quiet.

Movement caught her eye. Across the street and down the block a funeral coach pulled up in front of a house, and a man dressed in black slid from the driver’s seat. He hurried around the coach as people started coming out of the house. There were three women and two men. The women were weeping and dabbing at their eyes beneath black veils.

When the coach pulled away, Kathleen wondered who had died. The thought of death took her mind to Dwight Moody’s sermons. She recalled vividly how the evangelist had wept as he’d pleaded with lost people to come to Christ and be saved. She tried to shake the
Scriptures from her mind that Moody had used, but they seemed to be indelibly written on her memory. And then there were those haunting words from that unforgettable song, “What Thou my Lord hath suffered was all for sinner’s gain….”

Kathleen pressed fingertips to her temples and shook her head as if to dislodge the words, but they remained fixed in place. She had done her best to live a decent life. Why wasn’t that enough? Why did Moody and people like the Killanins have such a fixation for this business about Calvary and the crucifixion of Christ?

Caleb Harned was eager to get home today. As he walked with his school chums, they laughed and skipped along the street, taking their time. Usually Caleb was satisfied to be part of it, but today was the first day his new mother would meet him at the house.

One by one, the boys and girls peeled off when they reached their houses or had to turn a corner and head down another street. Two blocks from home, Caleb said to his remaining pals that he would see them tomorrow, then broke into a run.

When he reached the corner of his block, he looked up the street and saw someone sitting in the rocking chair. For a brief instant, Caleb envisioned his real mother there. She had always sat in that same chair while waiting for him to come home from school.

His heart skipped a beat, and he blinked against the glare of the afternoon sun, then got a clear view of Kathleen and started running again.

When Caleb stopped at the corner and peered at her, Kathleen instinctively knew what must be going on in his mind, and she left the chair.

As he bounded up the steps, she opened her arms and said in a quiet voice, “Hello, Caleb.” She held him close for a long moment, then looked down into his bright eyes and said, “How was school today?”

“Uh…fine, ma’am.”

“Do I detect that something didn’t go so well at school?”

“I…uh…I have some problems with remembering the alphabet.

And…uh…my teacher says I don’t write very good.”

“You mean your penmanship needs improving?”

“That’s exactly what Miss Wilson said. I’m supposed to work on it.”

“How about if I help you with both your problems?”

Caleb’s eyes brightened. “Would you? Would you really, ma’am?”

“I sure will. Put your lunch pail in the house, and we’ll go to the hotel. I’ll wait here for you.”

As they walked toward the business district, Kathleen matched her steps to the boy’s shorter ones.

A cold, brisk wind came down off the surrounding hills, and Caleb said, “It’s starting to feel like winter.”

Kathleen reached over and rolled up his coat collar around his ears. “Do you like winter, Caleb?”

“Oh, yes, ma’am! I really like the snow! Dad made me a sled last year. I had lots of fun with it, and I can’t wait to go sledding again!”

When they reached the hotel, Kathleen said, “I know you’re probably hungry. Did your mother let you have an afterschool snack?”

“Uh-huh.”

“They’ve got some cookies in the restaurant, and milk. Would you like some?”

“I’d really like that, ma’am!”

After the snack, when they had gone up to Kathleen’s room, she took out pen and paper and asked Caleb to write something for her. As she observed him, his main problem was apparent. He tended to hurry when he wrote. When she got him to slow down, his penmanship improved.

Next they worked on the alphabet. Kathleen made a game of it and told him some fun ways to remember the letters and their order.

When his lessons were finished, Kathleen taught him some new games he had never heard of. They had fun laughing together as he caught on.

Time passed swiftly, and when Kathleen glanced at the clock for the first time since they had entered the room, she started. “Oh! Caleb, it’s almost time for us to go down and meet your father for supper. Hurry! Lets get washed up.”

A scrubbed-up Tom Harned stood in the hotel lobby, watching the stairs. A smile broke across his angular face when he saw Caleb and Kathleen appear at the top of the carpeted staircase. They were holding hands.

As they slowly descended the stairs, Caleb waved to his dad but returned to chatting with Kathleen, and she smiled at his youthful exuberance.

Thrilled to see them together like this, Tom said under his breath, “Loretta, I’ve done my best to find a good mother for your boy, and I have no doubt I’ve been successful.”

When Tom met them at the bottom of the stairs, Caleb said, “Dad! She helped me with my writing, and with the alphabet, and I’m gonna do better now!”

“Thank you,” Tom said to Kathleen, an expression of deep gratitude in his eyes.

“My pleasure, Tom. Caleb’s a bright boy. He just needs some guidance in his schoolwork above what the teacher is giving him. It’s hard to give much individual attention when you’ve got lots of boys and girls to teach. Caleb and I will continue to spend time on his lessons.”

“I appreciate it more than I can tell you,” Tom said.

“I’m happy to do it,” she replied softly.

The trio enjoyed a hearty supper, and the mood was light and carefree. After dessert, Tom and Kathleen lingered over coffee.

“I saw you two holding hands as you came down the stairs,” Tom said. “Does this mean I’m out, and this kid is in?”

Kathleen laughed. “It just might!”

Tom rolled his eyes and looked at his son. “So that’s it, eh, Caleb? Are you going to marry this lady and take her away from me?”

“Dad, you know I’m too young to get married!”

“Whew!” Tom said, wiping a hand over his brow. “I’m sure glad. Or I’d sure enough lose her to you.”

A peaceful bond of happiness settled around them.

As the days came and went, and the bond between Caleb and Kathleen grew stronger and closer, Tom realized it was time for him and Kathleen to spend more time alone together. He was able to get Hank and Donna Mitchell to take Caleb for supper two or three evenings a week.

Since the nights were cold, it became Tom and Kathleen’s custom to stay in the hotel lobby after supper and sit by the fire. Tom knew he was falling in love, though he didn’t voice it.

On one particular evening, they were the only ones enjoying the fire’s warmth. They had been talking about their childhoods, laughing and having a good time. When the laughter faded, Tom’s face took on a serious mien. He took hold of Kathleen’s hand and looked into her eyes, and she let her hand relax in his.

“Kathleen—”

“Yes?”

“I’ve got to come out with it. I’m falling in love with you.”

Her heart pounded. “Something’s happening within me, too.”

“It’s what we were hoping for, isn’t it?”

“Yes, Tom, and thank you for allowing me time with this, and not pushing me into marriage.”

“I only want what’s right for both of us, and for Caleb,” he said with feeling. “I’m willing to wait till you’re ready to say, ‘Tom, I’m in love with you.’”

“You’re a wonderful man, Tom. There’s everything about you to love.”

Tom raised her hand to his lips and kissed it tenderly. “Goes double for you.”

Kathleen lay in her bed that night, looking up at the ceiling and the soft illumination from the street lamps below.

“Peter,” she whispered, “I know you want Meggie and me to be together, and I know you want us to be happy. We were so violently torn apart, and there’s nothing you or I can do to change it. I don’t like keeping Meggie’s existence a secret from Tom, but once I get her back, I’m sure he’ll love her and be a good father to her.