Secrets of the Tudor Court (11 page)

I am starting to think it is not so great a thing to be Anne Boleyn.

It pains me to admit that the days my father is up north visiting the queen—I mean, the princess dowager—are my most peaceful. I pack my things for our trip to France. I break from the norm and write some frivolous verse, which I share with some of my friends who are writing their own. We decide we will make a little compilation of our work. I vow not to write anything in “O Happy Dames” for Cedric Dane. I will not write a thing for him ever. Indeed, I hope not to have any future run-ins with the presumptuous lad again.

My peace is short-lived, for Norfolk returns, somber and unsuccessful in his attempt. Her Highness said she would not relinquish her jewels without a direct order from King Henry.

“No matter what I told her, she would not hear,” he sighs. “Strange. Was a time not too long past when she heeded my advice. Yet she clings to these ideals that are foolish and false. She lives in another time, or a time that never existed at all. Damn romantic fool.” His face twists in a sort of agony. Is it the agony Cedric described to me that day—the agony a lover feels? “If she’d give in, her life and that of her daughter would be so much easier. Doesn’t she want peace? She tries to avoid bloodshed, yet by remaining so obstinate she will cause it just the same,” Norfolk grumbles that evening as I sit before him, giving an update.

“She loves him,” I venture.

He flinches. “It is a matter of pride for the both of them. Love doesn’t enter into it at all. It is about religion and power and being right. That’s all it’s ever about with anyone. When will you see that?” He removes his cap and runs his hand through his thick black hair. “She’s not only obstinate, she’s fanatical, a martyr. Nothing is more pathetic than a martyr, Mary. See to it you don’t become one.”

I nod, then bow my head. I don’t want to discuss poor Catherine with him, so try another course. I raise my head and offer my sweetest smile. “I’m so excited to go to France, my lord.”

“I suppose you are,” he says idly, then meets my gaze with his impenetrable black eyes. “I expect you to conduct yourself like a lady. I know how it gets when traveling. Don’t get caught up in any foolishness. You think just because you’re abroad your actions have no consequences here, but they do. You have a reputation to maintain and I won’t have it sullied by girlish fancies.”

“Yes, my lord,” I say in a small voice, shrinking in my chair.

He rises. I do the same. He has not removed his eyes from me and I shift, uncomfortable under the raptorlike gaze.

“You will be watched, Mary—don’t think you won’t. There is not one thing that happens at this court that escapes me.” He lays a hand on my shoulder. I tremble, wondering if he knows about the time I spent with Cedric Dane. At the thought of the musician my heart bounds in an involuntary leap. Norfolk applies such pressure to my shoulder; dots of light appear before my eyes. The pain drives out any thoughts I’d been indulging in. He continues. “If I learn of any unseemly behavior on your part I will beat you within an inch of your life. Do you understand?”

I begin to tremble. Tears fill my eyes. It is the first time Norfolk has threatened me with physical violence. I know it is within his rights to discipline me as he sees fit, but I am not eager for such a demonstration.

I reach out, daring to take the hand that squeezes my shoulder with such force. “My lord…Father.” I swallow hard. “Don’t you think I’m a good girl?”

He withdraws his hand. “That remains to be seen.” He nods toward the door. “Dismissed.”

I curtsy, choking down tears, wondering how I can prove my worth to this formidable man.

His Majesty didn’t waste any time with soft words and negotiations. He ordered from Catherine the very jewels he had bestowed upon her in the years he claimed she was his only love. Catherine relinquished them.

Anne’s black eyes shine with triumph. She unpacks the diadem inlaid with sapphires and diamonds, the necklaces and eardrops, running her fingers sensually over each item as though they were the flesh of a lover.

“See?” she cries over and over. “See what my king does for
me
whom he loves?” She tips back her head and laughs that edgy laugh, her throat as long and graceful as a swan’s. “There is nothing he will not do to please me.”

“Unless you don’t get an heir in that belly of yours,” her sister teases.

Anne draws a hand back and brings it across Mary Carey’s cheek in a resounding slap. Tears light Mary’s eyes as she stares at her sister, scowling. As I regard her I realize, as if for the first time, how much Anne has taken from Mary; her lover, her place of high favor, and even her son. Anne has been given wardship of little Henry Carey, who is said to be another bastard of the king’s, because Anne supposedly feared for the boy’s moral development under Mary’s care. The court gossip is that in truth Anne adopted him in case she does not produce a male heir of her own. The likelihood that Henry would name the boy his heir is very slim, and everyone knows it to be a desperate move on Anne’s part. In any event, hopefully that is a plan she will not have to resort to. After all the trouble and heartache she and the king have wrought upon so many, the least they could do is produce a prince for the realm!

Mary brings her hand to her cheek and I am reminded of Mother doing the same whenever Norfolk spoke to her. Yes, there is a great deal of Howard in Anne.

For a moment the ladies are silent, until Anne adopts her lovely courtier’s smile. “I’m certain that is an area my”—she cocks a sweeping black brow in mischief—“virile king and I will have very little trouble in,” she says, causing many a speculative glance to be exchanged.

She has succeeded in lightening the mood, and soon everyone is back to discussing the voyage.

But Mary Carey stands in a corner, head bowed, staring at Catherine’s jewels—more things that Anne has stolen.

After we ogle the jewels some more, Madge Shelton and I extricate ourselves from Anne’s apartments and return to the maidens’ chamber to pick out our favorite gowns for the trip.

“She’s a wench, isn’t she?” Madge asks as she helps me unlace my sleeves to get ready for supper.

I am surprised she offers such open criticism of our mutual relation and want to agree, but guard my tongue. One never knows from one moment to the next when another’s loyalties will shift.

“I know I wouldn’t have wanted Princess Catherine’s jewels if I were her,” Madge goes on. “I’d want my own. Really, Mary, it’d be like wanting the wedding ring of your husband’s dead wife. It’s sort of…well, rather like a circling vulture, don’t you think?”

I can’t help but nod at that.

As she helps ease my sleeve off she brushes against the shoulder my father had squeezed with such enthusiasm some time ago. I try to stifle a groan, but it has escaped and Madge grabs my arm, examining the bruise that has faded from onyx black to a deep purple.

“God’s blood, Mary, who did this to you?” she asks, raising concerned blue eyes to me.

I withdraw my arm, smiling. “It was so silly,” I tell her. “I ran into a doorway. I’m so clumsy sometimes.”

Her lips twist. “Did the doorway resemble a man’s hand?”

I cover my shoulder with my sleeve. I have no words. I want to defend myself, to contradict her implications, but cannot. I bow my head, blinking back tears.

“It’s him, isn’t it? The duke?” she wants to know. Her voice is gentle but bears an edge, the same edge Anne adopts when angry. When I say nothing she continues. “Everyone knows about him, Mary. How he treats your mother. Tales have circulated…”

“It isn’t true,” I say, knowing I must stop her. “Whatever you’ve heard, put it out of your head. Please, if you have any love for me, stop this and do not take part in spreading any false rumors about my honored father.”

Madge’s eyes fill with tears as she finishes helping me dress. “You are very loyal, Mary. May it serve you well.”

I say nothing in my panic, wondering what the court whispers about my father, about my mother, about dark secrets that should never be aired.

That night I cannot contain my misery as I report to Norfolk. I tell him of Anne’s triumphant exclamations when her jewels were delivered, of her slapping her sister, of her provocative comment, which he makes me recite over and over. He tilts his head this way and that as he analyzes the statement.

“She’s far too confident in her own abilities,” he says after a while. “Her arrogance will destroy her if she isn’t careful. Damn!” He slams his fist on the desk. “If she’d heed my advice—what’s the matter with you?”

He has noted my tears, which I do not keep hidden as I stand before him.

“People are talking about you,” I tell him.

He offers what I describe as his almost laugh. A sound lacking in sincerity and warmth. “That’s nothing new. People talk about everyone; I daresay gossip could sustain the court should our foodstuffs run out.”

“They say you are cruel,” I go on.

“Not the worst reputation a man can have,” he says. “Better to be cruel than soft. Soft people don’t get ahead in life, do they?”

He then continues about Anne, airing his complaints as though my interposition has not affected him at all, as I am sure it has not. I close my ears to his words. There is nothing that pertains to me anyway.

My hopes for the conversation die. Hopes that he would be moved to repent of his ways and perhaps offer kindness and…softness.

I am diverted by our departure for France. The mood is gay and there is happiness even in our frantic, last-minute preparations. When we board the ship I am delighted to learn my brother and the Duke of Richmond are also joining us.

My brother Surrey clasps me to him when he sees me. “Look at you! Aren’t you the little lady?” he cries when he sees me standing at the railing on deck. I am relishing the feeling of the crisp wind, salty with sea spray, whipping against my face, the roll of the waves beneath my feet. In its uncertainty the sea feels wonderful and dangerous and exciting.

“Oh, Henry!” I am so thrilled at his affectionate display I wrap my arms tight about his neck. “It is so wonderful to see you! These glimpses at court I have been afforded are never enough!”

He laughs his easy laugh and holds me at arm’s length. “My God, you are a beauty. Has Father spoken to you about your marriage, then?”

I shake my head. I know it is inevitable and a slight thrill causes me to shiver as I entertain the thought. “Not since the plans for Bulbeck were tossed aside,” I answer. It is just as well, too. Imagine how much I’d miss if I were some country lord’s wife!

“Well, soon enough…” he says. “Lady Anne has plans for you. She and Father and—”

“Mistress Mary!”

I curtsy to the Duke of Richmond, who is running toward me, hands outstretched. I place mine in them and he rights me. At once the ship lurches forward, carried on a wave, and to my extreme embarrassment I topple over onto Fitzroy, knocking him to the ground. My brother helps us up, laughing.

My cheeks are burning. “I’m deeply sorry, my lord.”

“It’s Harry!” he grumbles in perfect imitation of his father. He offers a sideways grin. “That’s a greeting I’ll well remember!”

I bow my head, hoping my display doesn’t get back to Norfolk or the king, especially the king. I don’t want him to think I behaved wantonly in front of his son, illegitimate or not.

“A merry voyage this will be!” he continues. “We are invited to stay among the princes, Surrey and I, so a jolly time we shall spend with the naughty court of France!”

“How wonderful!” I cry, envying the lack of supervision at the famed French court where Lady Anne spent her own youth. “Henry, I have so much to show you! I’ve written verse. I write all the time. Will you look at it?”

“Of course!” he cries, and I run to retrieve my little casket of poems, eager to show my brother, so adept at poetry himself that I am at once intimidated and thrilled that he’d deign to look at my humble works.

We find an unobtrusive little corner where I allowed my brother full access to my compositions, save the unfinished “O Happy Dames.”

My brother looks them over. I am surprised at how fast he can read, for he flips through the pages almost carelessly. I am a little annoyed. I had hoped he would take his time with each phrase and offer helpful criticisms.

“You write a lot about God,” he says. “About your desire to be closer to Him and understand Him more through His own Word. Do you think this is wise?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?” I ask, defensive. “Who doesn’t want to learn more about God?”

Surrey’s face is stony. “I just think it echoes a lot of the New Learning. Steer clear of it, Mary.”

At once I remember my mother’s advice:
Believe what they want you to believe
. “No worries, brother. I follow my king,” I say with a sweet smile.

“That’s my girl,” he says, chucking me under the chin. He hands my poetry to Harry Fitzroy without my permission.

“What did you think, Henry?” I ask, nodding to the poems now in the young duke’s hands. He is reading them slowly. He does not flip through the pages as my brother did. I wonder what this portends. Perhaps he, too, finds some of it verging on heretical?

My brother shrugs. “Very pretty attempts, Mary. Adorable, even.”

My heart sinks. I did not want my poetry to be described the way one would an endearing puppy or child.

“We must go to the king now,” Surrey tells me. “We cannot be seen dallying with you too long. Come, Harry.”

Harry waves my brother off. Surrey starts ahead and Harry returns my poems. “I think they’re quite good—so much feeling,” he tells me. He nods toward my brother, adding
sotto voce,
“Don’t mind him. He’s jealous of anyone who tries their hand with any success at poetry or anything else.”

I smile. “Thank you, Harry.”

“We’ll have fun in France together, Mistress Mary,” he says, tossing me a bright smile that reflects in his blue eyes as he follows my brother to join the other gentlemen.

My heart is light. Harry managed to assuage my brother’s slight with his kind words.