Seductive Reasoning (24 page)

They could be friends. They would
only be friends, friends who occasionally shared a bed, friends who covered
each other with ice cream and then licked it off one drop at the time. Friends
who told each other their deepest fears in the darkest part of the night.
Friends who held each other while they slept.

Time to cut her losses. Kate didn’t
want him to see how much he hurt her, how much she loved him. “Well, I like you
too, Seth.” Misery clawed its way to the center of her heart. She forced a smile
and looked at her watch. “I’ve got five minutes before the shop opens. Oh, I
almost forgot. Ms. McFadden stopped by with the results of her experiment with
her boyfriend. It went very well. She even made another purchase. I gave her
some of my business cards, and she said she would pass them around to her
friends. I added her information to our graph. Everything is complete now. I’ll
bring it with me to the show, and we can talk about it then.”

His gaze skimmed her face and
concern darkened his eyes. Seth brushed the tip of his finger over her cheek.
“You okay?”

Kate did her best to settle her
face into a happy expression to hide her pain. “I’m fine.”

“You sure?”

Kate nodded.

“Well, I’ve got some work to do at
home. You left a few things in the bathroom. I’ll bring them to you later. Will
I see you tonight on the show?”

Her things. The show. Of course.
“I’ll be there.”

Seth smiled, turned on his heels,
and left the shop. She watched him walk down the front steps and out to his
truck. Pain speared into her heart.

Friendship.

He wanted friendship. Nothing more.
Thank God, she hadn’t admitted she was in love with him.

Chapter
Thirteen

Seth hadn’t been gone five minutes
before the door of the shop flew open and Aunt Pandora breezed in. She was
dressed in an eye-popping red skirt and matching blouse. Black mules covered
her feet and large gold hoops dangled from her ears. At her side, she swung a
shopping bag from Nordstrom.

“Darling girl, I found the most
divine dress to wear to a little soirée my friend Grace is throwing next week,
but I haven’t a thing to wear under it. You know even the best dress doesn’t
show off quite as well without the right undergarments.”

She threw Kate a brilliant smile
before it faded. Her eyes darkened with worry, and her mouth pulled into a
frown. “Oh, baby. What’s happened?”

Kate purposely ignored her question
and slit open a new shipment of panties and bras specifically designed for
Leos. Carefully, she removed each item from the box. The garments were a deep
bronze color with sunbursts scattered over the surface.

The Sun was Leo’s ruler, and the
source of life and strength. She could use every bit of that strength herself
right now. Kate fought against the tears burning at the back of her eyes and
the hurt clawing at her heart. She jerked a bunch of bras from the box and
slapped them down on the counter. This was the first time in her life she’d
ever not been glad to see her aunt.

She leaned down, reached under the
check-out counter, and rummaged through a large box of loose hangars. She found
the right ones for the bras and tossed them next to the cash register. She
wanted to be alone for just a little while to collect her thoughts, to try to
ease the ache in her heart.

Okay, maybe it would take more than
just a while, but she had to pull herself together enough to appear on the show
with some measure of dignity. Kate couldn’t remember the last time she’d let
loose with a good old-fashioned crying jag, but she was dangerously close to
it.

She didn’t want to be seen under
the glare of all those lights with a swollen nose and red eyes. Not to mention
the viewing audience. It wouldn’t do for the queen of lingerie to appear
looking wretched instead of energized and confident from her win.

A hard knot of misery pressed
against her windpipe. She swallowed, then heaved a deep breath. A small box of
white price tags with strings attached sat next to the cash register. Kate
plucked one out, hastily marked down the price, and then attached it to the
strap of one bra.

Aunt Pandora tossed her shopping
bag on the sofa under the window and strolled to her side with her heels
clicking on the floor. She said nothing, only helped Kate unpack the new
designs and stack them neatly until they could be tagged.

After a moment, Pandora stroked a
hand over Kate’s hair. “Want to talk about it?”

The knot in her throat eased enough
for her to speak. “Friendship. All he wants is friendship,” she snapped out and
threw one of the pairs of panties back into the box. “After everything we’ve
shared. I bared my heart and soul to that man. How could anybody be that
stubborn?”

The scent of Aunt Pandora’s perfume
drifted over her, and a cool draft of air-conditioned air wafted down, blowing
over her face in a soothing breeze.

Kate closed her eyes for a moment
and willed her emotions to settle. She could really use a dose of Seth’s logic
right now. The only problem was that in the past week a little of his
practicality had rubbed off on her--but not nearly enough. She still ran full
bore on emotions.

Aunt Pandora placed her arm around
Kate’s shoulders and squeezed. “I find that hard to believe. The other evening
when I stopped by, the two of you had been extremely cozy on that swing in the
backyard. That’s not usually something people who plan to be
just friends
do. Now why don’t we lock up the shop a bit early, go into the kitchen, and
talk about it. My feet are killing me, and I’d kill for a cup of tea.”

Once in the kitchen, Kate set the
kettle to boil and reached into the cabinet for the teapot. She set it on the
counter, then grabbed a box of loose tea, and poured several spoonfuls into the
pot. The man was impossible. He was nitpicky, fussy, judgmental. And she loved
him so much the thought of not having him in her life terrified her.

Kate whirled about and leaned on the
edge of the counter. Her aunt sat on one of the kitchen stools, her dressed
hiked up over her thighs, her shoes tossed carelessly onto the floor. She
massaged the instep of one foot and groaned. “So what exactly did the man say?”

Kate crossed her arms over her
chest. “He said he liked me.” She spit the words out like little bullets. “He
said that in a few days we’d not only become lovers, but friends as well. Then
he couldn’t wait to scurry out the door.”

Pandora let go of her foot and
rested it on a rung of the stool. She looked at Kate with sympathy in her eyes
and a faint smile on her lips. “You’re in love with him.”

Kate blinked, shrugged her
shoulders, and exhaled. “Yes. Completely and totally. I don’t know what
happened. One minute I was trying to win a bet and the next I’d fallen over a
cliff.”

At the sound of the whistling
kettle, she turned and poured boiling water into the pot. Kate slid on the top
and retrieved cups from another cabinet. How had she managed to let herself
love him when she wasn’t even sure if he accepted her?

Acceptance had to come first,
didn’t it? “I love him with all my heart. But I should have waited, waited
until I was sure.”

Aunt Pandora crinkled her brow.
“Sure of what, Katydid?”

Kate pulled open a drawer and
grabbed two infusers. She placed them over the lip of the cups, set them on a
tray along with the teapot, and brought everything to the center island.

Pandora retrieved the carton of
milk from the fridge and set it next to the sugar dish. Kate eased onto one of
the stools and poured out. “Sure that he accepted me.”

Pandora spooned in a generous
amount of sugar and milk, then stirred her cup quietly. She gave the spoon a
slight shake, then laid it carefully on the counter next to her cup. “Do you
have to be sure of someone’s acceptance before you can love him?”

Kate looked out of the kitchen
window. Sunlight trickled down and sparkled over the leaves of the trees, but
in the distance she saw dark purple clouds. Her gaze fell on the swing. She
remembered every touch, every kiss and softly whispered word. Her body
responded instinctively, wanting to feel Seth’s caress. “No ... I mean ... I
don’t know.”

Pandora propped her elbows on the
counter, held her cup between her fingers, and sipped some of her tea. She
sighed. “You love me, don’t you?”

Kate laid a hand on her shoulder.
“You know I do, but you’ve always accepted me.”

Pandora set her cup down on the
counter. “I’m glad to know it. What about your mother and father? Your sister
and brother? You love them?”

Kate poured some cream into her tea
and stirred. “Yes, of course. They’re my family.” She paused for a moment and
gathered her thoughts. “The thing I’m not sure about is if
they
love
me.” She’d never admitted that to anyone.

Her aunt plopped her hand down on
the counter with a thump. She turned to Kate and gripped her shoulders. Kate
jerked around and faced her aunt. Fury sparked in her eyes. She realized that
this was the first time she’d ever seen her aunt really angry.

“You actually think because your
parents and siblings don’t approve of or accept what you’ve chosen to do with
your life that they don’t love you? Is that it? Is that what you truly
believe?”

In a nutshell. “Yes. I always felt
that they didn’t really love me because they never accepted me. They’ve always
been disappointed in me and kept expecting me to change directions, to see that
they were right and I was wrong.”

Pandora sighed, drew her into her
arms, and gave her a tight squeeze. She pulled back and looked at Kate. “I have
a story to tell you. I want you to listen. Carefully.”

“No, let me do it.”

Kate jerked her head around to find
her mother standing in the doorway of the kitchen. A myriad of emotions washed
over her mother’s face in a few seconds. The first was hurt followed by a brief
flash of sadness. Then the emotions were gone as if blown away by some elusive
wind. She found a cup for herself and settled next to Kate. With practiced
ease, she prepared her tea and sipped delicately. “Pandora, would you mind
terribly if I talked to Katherine alone?”

“Not at all.” Pandora touched two
fingers to her lips and blew Kate a kiss before she slipped from the kitchen.

“Kate.” Her mother’s voice was soft
and gentle. Something stirred deep within Kate’s heart, like a little chick
awakening in its nest to find its mother nestled close by.

Her mother never called her
anything but Katherine.

“After your brother and sister were
born, we didn’t plan to have more children. The practice was beginning to take
off, and we’d managed to survive teething and potty training. We figured two
children were enough to make our family complete. But life tends to throw you
curves, some bad, some good, and some fantastic.” She smiled vaguely and sipped
her tea.

A bubble of hope swelled in Kate’s
heart. Was she saying that she was fantastic?

“The day your brother turned six, I
found out I was pregnant with you. I had all the usual symptoms but had chalked
them up to stress and overwork with young children thrown into the mix. When I
told your father, he looked so appallingly shocked for a moment, I thought he
might faint. Then after the initial shock had passed he burst into laughter,
gathered me up in his arms and confessed he’d always wanted three children.”

She turned to Kate and grasped her
hand. “You were a special gift to us, Kate. God knows you’ve never been easy,
but we couldn’t imagine our life without you in it. We accepted you from the
moment we knew you were on the way. And we have certainly
always, always
loved you. Don’t ever doubt that.”

The hope Kate felt in her heart
blossomed into a shiny burst of pure joy. Tears streamed down Kate’s face. She
threw her arms around her mother, closed her eyes, and clung. “You mean that,
don’t you?”

“With all my heart.”

All the doubts, the aching need
that had nagged and hounded her spirit for most of her life, dissolved on a
surge of happiness within her soul. Everything in her life would be nearly
perfect right now, if it weren’t for Seth.

Feeling empowered, she pulled from
her mother’s arms and swiped away her tears. “I need to fix my face and get to
the studio. I have a man to catch.”

Kate slid off the stool and headed
upstairs. She’d be damned if she was going to be just friends with Seth Fallon
for the rest of her life.

Hot studio lights brightened center
stage of Channel Four and beamed over Kate. She occupied the sofa next to Ms.
Landers who sat in her signature wingback chair and took her cues from a man
off camera wearing headphones. The show was about to begin, and her biggest
fear had come to pass.

Seth wasn’t going to appear.

She couldn’t believe it. A dull
ache throbbed in her heart. Disappointment spread through her veins. She
smoothed her hands over the bright green fabric of the dress that covered her
from neck to toes except for her arms, which were bare. A gold bracelet winked
in the intense light, and nervously Kate turned it around and around her wrist.
Slim columns of green dangled from her ears.

Seth had lost the bet and blown her
off. Just like that.

Friendship. He didn’t even want
that.

A camera perched to her left, and
one to her right, plus two more on the other side, with thick cables curling
over the glossy tile floor. The studio audience packed the rows of available
seats. People stood in clusters directly behind the bank of chairs and along
the sides of the studio. They jammed themselves in up to the border of the
stage where more people huddled on the floor.

She was always so cheerful, so
optimistic, but not today. Her nerves fired sporadically, and a hot ball of
tension burned through her gut. How could he do this to her?