Authors: Susan Crandall
June, sixteen years ago
One week after Laura was attacked
It had been seven days, and Laura had shown no signs of waking up. Ellis’s parents were keeping her locked up like a princess in a tower. She worried she might never have a drop of freedom again. Her mother cried almost as much as Aunt Jodi. Her dad had that expression, the one where his mouth was all hard and looked like it had parentheses around it, the one that said he was about to go batshit about something.
The only place they went was to the hospital. Which wouldn’t be so bad if they’d let Ellis sit alone with Laura. She’d gotten over her shock of seeing her cousin with a respirator tube in her throat and needles in her arms.
The nurse said Laura could probably hear them, that they should keep talking to her. Ellis wanted to tell Laura not to pay attention to all the negative crap everyone kept saying; if they thought she could hear, why did they talk like that in her room?
After a full week of living like that, and more of the same to come according to the doctors, Ellis was as jittery as a bird with clipped wings.
She needed to be alone. She needed to
move.
At five a.m., long before her momma and daddy were up, Ellis stepped out into the misty morning.
She could see only a short way down the beach. Mr. Coon and his dog were just shadows in the fog. Mr. Coon tossed a stick into the low surf, and Calliope chased after it. Ellis watched Calliope bring the stick back twice before she moved on. Something about it made her feel more normal.
The shell driveway crunched under her feet. The sound seemed loud in the early morning quiet. She glanced toward her parents’ window but saw no movement. Then she looked at Laura’s house. The curtains were drawn. Ellis knew no one was home, because both Aunt Jodi and Uncle Greg were sleeping at the hospital in Charleston.
Ellis felt as if she’d swallowed a sock, but no tears came. She’d already cried herself dry. Maybe today would be the day Laura woke up. She filled herself with that thought, that prayer, as she began walking toward town.
Even before she started running, her heart beat fast. She knew everyone thought it was dangerous for her to be alone. But Ellis wasn’t beautiful like Laura; the guy hadn’t taken Ellis when she’d been sleeping in the same room. Besides, she was careful. She wasn’t stupid enough to run on back roads. She stuck to where there were plenty of houses, just in case she needed to call for help.
And on top of that, she’d smell that man long before he was close enough to touch her. She’d recognize him. Even though it had been dark when she’d seen him, she’d never forget those vampire eyes as they’d caught the moonlight. Yes, she would recognize him, and then . . . then she’d scream and they’d catch him. They’d catch him and punish him for what he did to Laura.
Her anger burned hotter. She
wished
he’d come after her. She wanted him to. Then all of the ridiculous talk about Nate would go away, and the man who hurt Laura would go to jail forever.
It grew lighter as she ran; a depressing gray light because of the fog. As she passed Blue Heron Park, she saw someone sitting on top of a picnic table about twenty yards from the street.
She slowed, looking carefully. She sniffed; humidity carried scent better than dry air.
The figure moved and she froze.
Then she heard the soft whinny and looked beyond the picnic table. A horse was tied near the edge of the woods that led to the marsh.
Her momentary fear disappeared.
Nate raised his hand in a half-wave.
Ellis climbed over the knee-high chain-to-post fence that separated the park from the street, her heart lifting for the first time in a week.
Reaching the table, she climbed up and sat next to him. They sat shoulder to shoulder with their feet on the bench seat. Nate’s hair was damp from the mist, making it look darker than normal.
He gave her a tired, sad smile. “Paco said to tell you hello.”
Ellis smiled back, feeling just as tired as Nate looked. “Tell him I miss him.” She’d bite off her tongue before she told Nate one of the reasons she hadn’t been to the stables was because her parents had forbidden her to be around him.
They sat in silence for several minutes, staring toward woods swathed in gray haze. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him swipe his wrist across his face.
“They won’t let me see Laura.” He sounded so alone, she wanted to take his hand. But they were folded tightly in front of him.
“This will get straightened out,” she said. “And they’ll have to let you see her.”
He turned away and made a sound that could have been a scoff or a muffled sob.
“The police don’t think it was you,” she said. The entire town, on the other hand . . .
“They’ve had me to the station
three
times for questioning. They tried to get me to make a confession.”
“That’s ridiculous! I told them what I saw. They had me looking at mug shots!” She realized how loud she was being and lowered her voice. “How can they think it was you?”
“There are things you don’t know, are too young to understand.” He scrubbed his hands over his face.
“I’m not too young!” She was so tired of everyone saying that. “What? What don’t I know?”
He shook his head. Then he looked at her. His gray eyes reminded her of mercury. “How is she?”
Ellis looked away. She couldn’t lie while looking into his eyes. “I think maybe she’s a little better.”
He sat up straighter and grabbed her arm. “She’s awake?”
“No,” she admitted. Then she added, “But her eye isn’t swollen completely closed any—”
He slammed his fist on the picnic table. It was so unexpected that she jumped a little and looked at him. His eyes were closed, and he looked like he might throw up.
He took a deep breath, then opened his eyes. They didn’t look like mercury anymore. They looked dark, like storm clouds.
“What are your parents doing, letting you run around alone at this hour?” His voice was as angry as she’d ever heard it.
“They don’t know,” she said in a small voice.
“You snuck out? Ellis!”
She raised her hands. “I know. I know. But I just couldn’t stand it. They’re suffocating me!” She paused, then added lamely, “I left a note.”
He got off the picnic table and stood in front of her. He put his hands on her shoulders. “Listen to me. Whoever did this is still out there somewhere. You have to be careful.”
“I
am
careful.” She was getting her bristles up, as her momma called it.
“No, you’re not. No one knows where you are. And you shouldn’t be out alone.”
“I’m not,” she said smartly. “I’m with you.”
He ran a hand through his hair. It stood straight up in spikes, like a rock star. “Okay,” he said. “Get up.”
She stood and crossed her arms over her chest. She wasn’t going home. Not yet.
“If you’re gonna be so damn belligerent, I’m gonna teach you a couple of ways to defend yourself.”
“If you know some, why didn’t you teach Laura?” she asked before she really thought about what she was saying.
He stood there, looking like she’d just punched him in the gut. She felt terrible. “I’m sorry—”
He shook his head. “You’re right. I should have.”
“No,” she said. “None of us knew this could happen.”
Something flashed in his eye, the same look as when he’d said she was too young to understand some things. Then he took her by the shoulders and squared her in front of him. “Well, it’s not going to happen again—not to you.”
He showed her what to do if someone grabbed her from behind. He made her do it over and over. She got closer to getting away each time.
When they took a break, he told her this was just the first move he was going to teach her. He wanted her to be prepared.
Ellis sat next to him again, wondering at the feelings swirling inside her, at the little sparkles rushing through her blood. Even though he was just teaching her to protect herself, when he touched her, it was like . . . magic. When he touched her, she felt safe.
She realized Nate was still talking. “ . . . been learning jujitsu and Grav Maga; with that one you can really hurt somebody.”
“You want to hurt somebody?”
He stared at her for a minute, then said, “I want to kill whoever did that to Laura.”
A little chill danced over her skin; something in his voice scared her just a little.
He blew out a long breath. “Back to work.”
She shook out her cramped muscles and said, “Okay, this time I’m gonna do it.”
He came at her from behind again. Just as his arms encircled her, she heard someone shouting from the street. “Hey! You! Stop!”
When Ellis looked up, she saw a woman running toward them. Her car sat on the street with the driver’s door hanging open.
Nate let Ellis go.
She raised her hands. “It’s okay! I’m okay!”
As the woman got closer, Ellis saw it was Dr. Kreag, her family physician.
“He was just teaching me how to defend myself,” Ellis said.
Dr. Kreag didn’t look convinced. “What are you two doing out here so early?” She looked past Ellis, giving Nate a nasty glare. “Aren’t you a little old to be—”
“It’s not like that!” Ellis said. “I was running, and Nate told me I shouldn’t be out alone. He’s showing me some martial arts stuff.”
“Do your parents know you’re out here . . . with
him
?”
Ellis glanced at Nate. Why wasn’t he saying anything?
“No. They were sleeping when I left. I didn’t want to wake them.”
Dr. Kreag extended her arm and motioned Ellis forward with a flip of her fingers. “I think I should take you home.”
“I’d rather run back.”
“I
insist.
” Dr. Kreag shot Nate another hateful look.
“She’s right,” Nate said. “You should go.”
As she got in the doctor’s car, Ellis saw Nate walking to his horse. He didn’t look back.
Ellis listened as the last of the rain dripped in the downspout, missing Nate more than she had in years. He couldn’t have imagined, as he’d suffered scrapes and bruises from her attempts to thwart his mock attacks, how those lessons would change her life. Teaching teenage girls how to protect themselves had become a very important part of who she was.
And during her secret meetings with Nate, she’d discovered something new, something adult. His intimate closeness had awakened feelings inside her that she’d only read about in novels and seen in movies. A deep yearning that she had had no idea how to quell.
She wondered, Did he ever draw on fond memories of the time they’d spent together? Could he recall the feel of her against him as acutely as she recalled his touch? Or had she faded completely from his memory?
Foolish, foolish thoughts.
Ellis closed her eyes, and snippets of her life flashed, changing quickly from one to another, endless in their progression, relentless in their emotional toll.
The quiet, steady hum of the air conditioner usually cultivated a feeling of being safely cocooned, lulling her gently to sleep. Tonight it annoyed her like a dripping faucet.
With a frustrated sigh, she threw off the covers and got out of bed.
The moon had come out, casting shadows of furniture and houseplants, making it easy to make her way to the kitchen. She left the lights off as she poured herself a glass of milk. Then she went into the living room, her head pounding from all her overthinking.
There was an air-conditioning vent directly in front of her sliding door, making the glass cool to the touch. She leaned her forehead against it; not quite an ice pack, but much less trouble.
Rolling her forehead from temple to temple across the cool surface, she stopped when a tiny red-orange light caught her eye. There, below, beneath the old oak, just behind a curtain of Spanish moss.
She looked more carefully. It disappeared. She set the glass of milk on the table and stepped back from the door, glad she’d left her lights off.
Keeping her gaze fixed on the place where she’d seen the glow, she waited. In a few moments, it shone again. Then faded.
A cigarette. Why would someone be standing out there smoking at this hour . . . or any hour, for that matter? The humidity after that rain was heavy enough to make a cigarette nearly too damp to burn.
Thoughts of Alexander’s threat bounced around in her mind. Her heart sped up.
She was overreacting. There was a guard on the gate. No one got in who shouldn’t.
Rory? Security knew him; he was on an automatic approval list. And he’d seemed adamant in his conviction to protect her.
But Rory didn’t smoke.
So what if someone was out there smoking.
At three a.m.? Under a dripping tree?
Maybe she should call and have security check it. Yes, that’s what a rational person would do.
A rational person would just go back to bed.