Seesaw Girl (5 page)

Her mother was still speaking. "I have decided that as your punishment you will beat the family laundry for five days, by yourself. But not only with your hands—you must do it with a willing heart."

Jade nodded numbly. "Yes, Mother. It shall be so." She longed to speak to her mother of the things she had seen that morning, but it was not her place to do so unless her mother brought up the subject first.

Jade's mother looked at her daughter for a long moment. "Little Jade ... Do not think that I do not understand. I know that life in the Inner Court sometimes lacks excitement. But I wish to tell you something that you will learn for yourself when you are older." She walked to the paper door of the room and slid it open.

"Come stand here with me, Jade," she said. They stood together and looked out over the Inner Court. It was quiet now. Lanterns hung at the corners of the buildings, and the rooms beyond glowed golden behind their paper doors. Jade could hear voices and occasionally laughter.

"At the end of the day, when I am so tired from the laundry and preparing the food and caring for all the people in our household, sometimes I stand here like this. Everyone has eaten well and has clean clothes. Soon everyone will go to sleep in neat, orderly rooms. I have helped with all that. It is partly because of my work that the house of Han is at peace."

She looked down at Jade and stroked her hair. "It is a very satisfying feeling, Jade. And someday you too will feel it. This is what I wish for you."

In the touch of the gentle hand on her hair, Jade felt forgiveness. But part of her was still uneasy. She turned her head and looked up into her mother's face.

"Mother," she whispered.

"Yes?"

"This feeling that you speak of. Is it enough for your happiness?"

Jade thought her mother looked sad for just a moment, but then her face was smooth again. "Yes, Jade," she answered. "I have learned to make it enough."

Chapter Eleven

Different Rules

There was an eerie tension among the adults the next day. Jade noticed it at once. Her mother was stern and tightlipped at the morning meal, the aunts quiet and fearful. At first Jade thought it was because of her escape, but gradually she realized that it must be something more.

Her father and uncles did not speak as Jade tiptoed among them serving their food, but that in itself was not unusual. It was considered bad manners to speak while eating. It was the heaviness of their silence that worried Jade, and the way her uncles kept stealing furtive glances at her father.

The news of her escape could not have been the cause. It would have been equally poor manners for any of the men to show disapproval, for her punishment had been dealt with by her mother. It was not their business to concern themselves about her misdeed.

Later that morning she met Tiger in the garden. Jade had so many questions for him that she hardly knew where to begin. The atmosphere that lay over the house made her whisper.

"Brother, yesterday I saw some strange men being taken to the palace. They had broken the law, someone said." Jade swallowed nervously. "Who are these men? What did they do? Does it have something to do with our father?"

Tiger Heart looked almost terrified. "Sister, these are truly not matters of your concern. You must not ask such questions."

Jade was astonished. "Brother, I know it was wrong of me to leave the Inner Court. But surely you can tell me something about what I saw."

Tiger looked around the garden as if someone might be listening. "Our father has told me a little of these matters, but I do not really understand. I know only that those men come from a land far, far from here. Their ship crashed into Cheju Island during a storm several months ago, and now they have been brought here for the King to decide their fate.

"The sailors say that they were headed for Japan, but who knows if they are telling the truth. Perhaps they intended to come here all along. No such strangers have been allowed in Korea for nearly a hundred years. There are many in our King's court who are angry. They believe all such strangers should be killed.

"But our father thinks it would be far better not to show fear of these men. He tells me that they might bring new ideas to Korea, and that perhaps we could learn from them.

"Our father does not want such men to be killed. The King's court is in great disagreement now. No one knows what the King will decide."

Jade shook her head in worry and bemusement. She was about to ask more questions when Tiger changed the subject abruptly. He informed her that the servant who had been driving the cart had been dismissed by their father.

Jade looked aghast. "But Brother! It's not fair! It wasn't his fault—he didn't even know I was there!"

Tiger looked at her sternly. In some way Jade felt that he had understood why she had attempted her escape, and he had not said one word against it—until now. "Jade, it is not your place to question the actions of our father."

Jade's heart ached when she thought of how her rash plan had cost a man his job. She remembered how he had tried his best to cover her with the cloth, and realized that he must have felt doomed from the moment he laid eyes on her. She sighed, but for the moment her thoughts turned to something else.

"Brother, the next time you go to the marketplace, I need you to do me a favor. Please give my share of sweets to the child of Chang the cabbage seller. His stall is the third on the right, and the child is the age of our brother, Mountain Wind."

Tiger was exasperated. "Sister, don't you think this adventure should be behind you now?"

"It is, Brother. But I made a promise, and I must keep it."

Tiger relented. "Just this once. If I start handing out sweets, every urchin in town will be begging from me."

It was not a compromise that satisfied Jade; she had planned to ask Tiger to give the child her share of sweets on a regular basis. She had had time to reflect on their encounter, and recalled how the child had made three sweets sound like a king's treasure.... Tiger brought her at least a dozen sweets at a time. The memory of the child's lively eyes and friendly manner had become one of the few highlights of her forlorn adventure. But Jade had still more questions.

"Brother, when I was out on the road, I saw many women and girls. Are they always there? How is it that they leave their Inner Courts?"

Tiger looked puzzled, then uncomfortable. "Their families are different," he mumbled.

"Different? What do you mean? Don't they care that strange men see them all the time?"

Tiger considered for a moment. "You know our servants. They live with us, and earn money, and once a year they go home to visit their own families."

Jade sat still, trying hard to understand. She knew that the servants left once a year, at different times, depending on when they could most easily be spared from their work. The gardener left for several days during the winter. The cook left in the spring, during a stretch of time when there were no feast days. But Jade had never thought to wonder where they went when they left.

"What does that have to do with the girls out there on the road?"

"Jade, not everyone lives as we do. Those women and girls, their families are poor—even poorer than our servants. Everyone in their families has to work—"

"Everyone? Even the girls?"

"They live in a different way—they don't have the same rules—" Tiger stumbled over his words as he tried to explain.

Jade thought some more about the people she had seen. She had not thought much of it then, but now she could remember their rough clothing, unkempt hair, and bare feet. And in her mind she had an image of Willow in her silk robes, carried aloft in her sedan chair, while behind her the little Chang child scrabbled for sweets in the dirt.

Chapter Twelve

A Humble Request

Jade paused before the door of the finest room in the men's quarters. But she hesitated for only a moment, for she knew if she stood there any longer, she would lose her courage. She cleared her throat and called quietly.

"
Abu-ji?
" Hoping from the outset to communicate her respect, Jade used the most formal word for "father," not the more affectionate
Ah-pa.

The paper door slid open. Jade's father, head of the Han household, stood in the doorway. Although, as always, his face showed no emotion, Jade thought that he looked very tired.

"Good evening, Daughter. Have you eaten well?" He returned her greeting with equal formality.

In truth, Jade did not know her father very well. It was the custom in noble families for the father to attend to his work and the family's financial matters, the mother to deal with the children and the household affairs. In recent years Tiger had seen a great deal of their father, as he was being groomed to become head of the household himself one day. But the other children—Jade and little Mountain Wind, her younger brother—were entrusted to their mother's care. On feast days and at other family celebrations their father might honor them with a small gift or perhaps tell them stories of the wonders of the King's court. Otherwise, the children left him to his business, and he left them to theirs.

So it was with great trepidation that Jade had approached him that evening. She knew that what she had to say would not please him, and it would serve to remind him of her recent dishonorable behavior. But after two days and as many sleepless nights, she knew she no longer had a choice in the matter. She had to speak.

"Yes, thank you, Father."

"Please come in." Jade stepped into the room, and her father closed the door behind her.

It was a beautiful room. The walls were hung with precious scrolls by the most famous of the country's writers and artists. A rare tiger-skin rug covered part of the floor. And in a specially made niche stood the wondrous ivory ball.

She looked at it now, as she sat on the floor before her father's low table, and its familiar puzzle comforted her. Her own ivory ball was in her pocket, as a reminder of her father's rarely shown affection. She took a deep breath and bowed her head.

"Honorable Father, I am sorry to disturb you this evening. But I have something to ask of you."

Her father did not reply. He merely gestured with his hand for her to continue.

"When I behaved so dishonorably the other day"—Jade kept her head bowed and did not look at her father—"I did so with no one else's knowledge. Servant Cho did not know that I was in the cart when he left the house."

Jade paused. She had rehearsed her words many times in her head, but now she was coming to the most delicate part of her speech.

Her father waited.

"I do not question my honorable father's wisdom in his actions. But I humbly request that he allow Servant Cho back into our household. With your permission, I would like to explain why."

Jade's father was silent. Unsure of what to do, Jade finally decided to take his silence as permission.

"When Servant Cho saw me at the marketplace, he showed great concern for our family's honor. He ran into the marketplace at once and bought cloth to cover me. He made sure that I was hidden from the eyes of strange men all the way home. In every way he acted as a loyal servant to our family. I do not wish him to be punished for my mistake."

That was all. It had taken Jade so long to find the words, and only a few seconds to say them. She could do nothing now but wait.

After what felt like an eternity, her father spoke.

"Right behavior is indeed important, Daughter. It is one of the Five Virtues. Your brother has been learning much about them. Right behavior, good form, wisdom, faith, and love. They are small words, but they hold all that is good about men."

He rose to his feet. He fetched the ivory ball from its place on the shelf, seated himself again, and began turning the ball slowly in his hands as if studying it closely. But Jade could see that his thoughts were elsewhere.

He started to speak, then hesitated. At last he seemed to make up his mind about something, and spoke. "You saw the men on the road the other day? The strangers?"