Settling Ashes: A New Adult/College Romance (The Ashes Series Book 2) (12 page)

More than that though, I just wanted to spend time in the same space where she thrived, healthy and happy. She made the air around her shimmer with a warm glow. I was lucky to be in her orbit at all, and I needed all of that glimmer back full-time. I was lost without it.

But now Gillian wanted us to meet to talk about some conspiracy theory she was having. I was concerned about Paige, but I had a hard time believing someone wanted to hurt her, much less because of me. It just seemed far-fetched. I’d much rather believe that this was an accident, a completely isolated incident.

“Well,” Gillian answered. “The usual crew. Me, you, Rob here, Paige. And Drew is coming, of course. And Tima.”

Her gaze slid to the floor as she busied herself with pushing the carpet fibers back and forth with her toe. “And Beau.”

I stifled a groan. Barely. Suddenly, now that I had Paige back in my life, it seemed I had to have Beau, too. His obnoxious face was peeking out from around every corner. He wanted my girl, and was brazen as hell about it. And I was not okay with that.

Paige squeezed my hand in hers, reading my thoughts.

“Hey, Gill?” she asked suddenly.

“Yeah?” Gillian replied, looking wary.

“Can you, uh, stay at Tima’s tonight? Me and Clay need some alone time.”

“Ugh,” she said. “I suppose. I don’t want to be here for
that
.”

“No,” Paige said, smiling wickedly at me. “You definitely don’t.”

My chest clenched with adoration for her; her words and the indication behind them made me want to yank her up and carry her to her room right then, throw her on her bed, and tear all of her clothes off with my teeth. I took a deep breath, trying to control my emotions and my manhood. Epic fail on both accounts.

Paige felt the tightening in the crotch of my jeans under her calves, and she chuckled quietly. She leaned down to whisper in my ear.

“Oh, I have the cure for that; later, my love.”

“You just got home from the hospital,” I grumbled. “You might not be up for it, Paige.”

“I was released from the hospital because I’m
okay
,” she insisted. “I’m up for it, Forbes.”

“Anyway,” Gillian was saying. “Everyone will be here around five. We’ll cook, and then we’ll talk. Got it?”

Rob agreed and made a quick exit. Gillian went into the kitchen to start cutting up vegetables and preparing meat. I leaned my head back on the couch and tried to get ahold of my desires, and Paige closed her eyes and fell asleep, a small smile spread across her lips.

~**~

We sprawled out around the living room after dinner, everyone glancing at everyone else with curiosity and apprehension.

“Well,” I said to Gillian impatiently. “You called this meeting. Get on with it.”

I was in a hurry for her to move the meeting along, because I was in a hurry to have Paige to myself. I’d been bristling all night because of Beau’s irritating presence. As soon as he walked in the door, he glanced at me where I sat next to Paige, her head on my shoulder and her broken arm huddled against her chest encased in it’s big blue cast. Then he’d leaned over and kissed her forehead in greeting.

If he kept touching her with his damn lips, I was going to have two murder charges to defend, instead of just one.

“Yeah,” Paige said sleepily. “What’s up, Gill?”

Gillian glanced at Beau, who nodded at her encouragingly.

“Okay, so,” she began. “I’m worried about you, Paige. Like, seriously, pooping my pants worried. I think someone wants to kill you. And I think”—she looked at me apologetically—“ it’s because of Clay.”

My arm tightened involuntarily against Paige as I stared at Gillian.

“Are you serious right now?” I asked her, my jaw dropping wide open.

“Yes,” she said firmly. “Beau agrees with me.”

“Oh, well if he agrees,” I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

“Look,” Beau said, in that country-boy drawl that made me want to kick his Southern ass across the room.

“I haven’t been around this situation that long, but it just seems to me that someone doesn’t want you with Paige, Clay. They got rid of her when Hannah was killed, and then she came back. As soon as she did, she was a marked woman again.”

“Do you think this is connected to Hannah’s murder, too?”  Tima asked with wide eyes.

“Yeah, we do,” Gillian answered.

I shook my head in disbelief. “Who wouldn’t want me with Paige?”

“That’s exactly the question we should be asking!” Gillian exclaimed, clapping her hands together like Nancy Drew. “Do you have any idea? I mean…I know that Hannah didn’t want you together. But she obviously isn’t an issue anymore. It seems someone else didn’t want you with her, either. I think seeing you two together that night may have been what got her killed.”

“Wow, Gill,” Paige said quietly. “You’ve really been thinking about this haven’t you?”

Gillian nodded.

“I don’t know,” I said dubiously, shaking my head slowly. “This just seems crazy to me. I don’t know anyone who wouldn’t want me with Paige. I have no other exes, other than Hannah.”

“Maybe not ‘official’ exes,” Gillian said, cutting her eyes at me. “But you’ve gotten around, Clay. You know there are a lot of jealous girls on this campus.”

“Gill!” Paige accused in a scandalized tone.

“Well, I’m just being honest,” muttered Gillian.

“She has a point, dude,” Drew piped up. He was still chewing on a mouthful of steak and potatoes. Everyone else was finished eating.

Everyone’s eyes riveted to Drew and didn’t leave him immediately.

“What?” he mumbled through his mouthful. “You bagged like, a ton of girls before you met--”

“Okay,” I interrupted him loudly, leaning forward and unwinding my arm from around Paige so I could focus on Gillian. “What do you propose we do about this? I’m obviously not taking any chances with Paige’s safety until we figure this out. I’m actually going to ask my lawyer to put his investigators on it right away.”

“I’m glad you said that, Clay,” Beau said, also leaning forward from his spot in the armchair. “Because I know a way we can keep Paige safe.”

Gillian bit her nails nervously. I looked at her in suspicion. She clearly knew where Beau was going with this.

“What do you suggest, Beau?” I asked, each word succinct and wary.

“I’m not suggesting it. I’m insisting that Paige move back to Haygood with me, at least until this gets sorted out.”

“
What?”
Paige and I exclaimed simultaneously.

I jumped to my feet, wincing at the pain in my ribs as I did so.

“Dude,” I said through clenched teeth. “I don’t give a
fuck
about the fact that my arm in in a sling. I will kick your
ass
if you suggest again that my girlfriend goes to live with you.”

He stood as well, moving to stand across from me, the coffee table squatting between us. Rob stood up silently in the corner where he had been lounging on a beanbag. I didn’t need to look at him to know he had my back; he’d either help me kick Beau’s ass if needed or he’d hold me back from killing him. Whichever one I needed the most in the moment.

“I’m serious,” Beau spat. “Don’t you care about her safety at all? She’s not okay here with you!”

Gillian and Tima looked back and forth between us warily.

“Guys,” Tima said quietly.

“No,” I nearly shouted. “No! She’s not going anywhere. Especially not with you. You got her for a month, man. That’s only because
I didn’t know where she was.
”

“Yeah, and when you did know where she was, she was being used as a battering ram in your damn car.”

Beau’s hands were fisted at his sides, and his face was growing redder as our conflict ensued.

“Stop,” Paige said, placing a hand on my good wrist. “Both of you. I can speak for myself you know. I say where I’m going to be, and I’m not going anywhere.”

I sighed with relief at her words and her touch. Because truthfully, I knew that if she wanted to go with Beau I couldn’t stop her. I just didn’t want her to go anywhere.

“I’m staying,” she said flatly, looking at Beau, and then at Gillian. “I now you guys want to protect me, but this could be all for nothing. We have no proof that someone is trying to hurt me. I think that car accident was just that…an accident. So Clay’s lawyer will look into it, but until we have something concrete to go on, I’m not running away from
anything.
”

She looked up at me and smiled slightly. “Plus, I’ve been away from you long enough.”

Beau rolled his eyes and blew out a puff of air in frustration. “Paige, you’ve always been stubborn as a--”

“Hey!” I growled. “Don’t talk to her like that. She told you how she felt. The end. And don’t ever suggest anything like that again. She’s
mine
to protect.”

He came around the table to stand next to Paige, and my arms twitched with the desire to put her behind me and not to let her talk to him. I held back, only because I knew she was safe.

“Paige,” he said quietly, reaching out for her non-injured hand. “Will you promise me that if we find out you’re not safe here, you’ll come to Haygood with me? This is about you being okay, not about anything else.”

The meaningful gaze he aimed at her made my stomach clench and my skin crawl. The dude was in love with her. It was written all over his face.

She tilted her head, giving him one of the saddest looks I’d ever seen on her face. She glanced at me, and I was staring at her, too.

She nodded at him. “Okay. If I’m not safe here, I’ll come back.”

My mouth dropped open, and I whirled her around to face me.

“You
will
be safe here,” I admonished. “I swear, I will never let anything happen to you.”

She glanced between Beau and I, and then she sat back on the couch with a weary sigh. My jaw was clenching and unclenching with the strain of hearing her tell Beau “yes.” To anything.

“Fine, fine,” Gillian said with a sweep of her hand. “I made my feelings known. Can we all at least keep our eyes open? Please?”

“We’ve got you,” Drew said to her seriously. “And Paige.”

“Good,” Gillian nodded briskly. “Meeting adjourned. Now, I guess I need to pack a bag. Paige kicked me out tonight so she and Clay can have
alone time.
”

I watched Beau’s face fall, and he took a step backward. “Can I talk to you for a second?” he asked Paige.

“No,” I said rudely, putting my arm around her protectively.

“Clay,” she said, turning to me. “You don’t have to protect me from
Beau.
” She leaned up on her toes to whisper in my ear. “Do you trust me?”

I looked down into her eyes, reaching out to brush the strand of her dark hair away from her left eye. A pang of sadness stabbed me when I though about how far she’d come with her self-consciousness; she never worried about strategically placing that patch of hair over her barely-there scar from the fire anymore. And now she had a large bandage in almost the same spot from that stupid accident.

“Yeah,” I whispered back. “I do.”

She smiled and leaned up to brush her lips across mine. “Love you.”

I squeezed her hand tightly before I let her go, and watched her walk out the front door with him.

I was so tired of watching her walk away from me.

Twelve

Paige

“You are really starting to tick Clay off,” I warned Beau as we walked out the front door to stand against the brick wall across the walkway.

“I don’t give a rat’s hindparts,” he retorted. “I’m worried about you, not him.”

“I’m fine, Beau,” I said, looking up into his eyes. “You don’t have to worry about me.”

“I know he loves you, Paige,” he said grudgingly. “But I love you, too. And you’d be safer with me.”

“We don’t know that,” I pointed out.

“I do.”

I sighed. Then I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck, squeezing him in a hug. “I’m grateful I have a watchdog like you, Beau.”

“You’d better get used to it,” he said in a voice as fierce as hurricane winds. “I’m going home, because I have to work in the morning. But you know my number, and I want you to promise you won’t hesitate to use it if you need anything.”

“I promise,” I said. “Goodnight, Beau.”

“Goodnight, beautiful,” he answered, watching me as I walked back inside the apartment.

I closed the door quietly behind me and noticed Drew, Rob, and Tima putting on their coats in preparation to leave. Clay hadn’t returned to his seat on the couch when I’d left; he remained standing. I caught him mid-pace when I walked in the door. He visibly sighed with relief when I approached him.

“We’re out,” Rob announced, dropping a kiss on my cheek as he scooted by me. “See ya, Paige. We’ll always have your back, alright?”

“I know,” I said, smiling at him. “I mean, I’ve got to be the safest girl in Rutherford, with y’all watching out for me.”

“Damn right,” Drew agreed, kissing my other cheek.

“Hey!” Clay exclaimed, holding out his good arm. “Why the hell can’t everyone keep their lips off my girl?”

“Because she’s so darn cute,” Tima answered, hugging me tightly.

Her black curls bobbed around her face; she’d pulled her hair up into a large pile of curliness on the crown of her head tonight. She looked gorgeous and exotic, as always, with her light brown skin and slanted eyes. “Love you, girl.”

“Love you harder,” I smiled at her. “Goodnight, y’all.”

I left the door open when I saw Gillian coming down the hall, towing her duffle bag. “Call me if you need me, chick.”

“I will.”

I was almost sick of the request; I wondered if the day would ever come that I was no longer the person who needed everyone to watch out for her. Ever since the fire, I’d been a burden: a burden on Gillian, a burden on Clay, and now a burden on Beau and the rest of my friends. I needed, for my own sanity, to reach a place where everyone was confident in my abilities to look out for myself first and foremost.

I closed the door behind her and turned to Clay, aiming a sly smile at him.

“Alone at last,” I remarked, leaning against the door.

I saw his eyes immediately pique with interest. “Yeah. What are we gonna do with ourselves?”

I faked a wide yawn. “I’m exhausted. I think I’ll just head on to bed.”

He made quick work of the space between us, and gently took me in his arms. “Nice try, woman.”

He bent his head and grabbed my earlobe between his teeth, eliciting a gasp from my throat.

“You’re right,” I gasped. “I’m not the least bit sleepy.”

“That’s good,” he murmured, his breath blowing hot against my neck. “Because I wasn’t going to let you sleep.”

“No?” I asked, tilting my head to give him better access.

His good hand came around me, pressing me to him with his palm flat on my stomach.

“Yeah,” his lips found the sweet spot on my neck and I sucked in a breath as he tasted my skin. I breathed out again, leaning my weight against him in surrender.

His hand moved beneath my shirt, snaking up my abdomen to pinch the front clasp of my bra. It opened, and he cupped me greedily, kneading my soft skin with his fingers. A true moan escaped my lips.

“See, baby,” he said, allowing his lips to leave my neck.

The absence of them was cold, and I squirmed, wanting to feel his lips against me again. “You have to stay with me. So every night can be this sweet.”

“So sweet,” I agreed, turning in his arms. 

I stared up at him, his bright blue eyes blazing with protectiveness and need. I reached for the hem of his shirt. Taking it off of him was much more difficult with my arm in a cast and his in a sling, but we made it work slowly but surely, and when he was shirtless I hummed with pleasure. I could live for a thousand years, and I’d never get sick of seeing Clay Forbes without his clothes on.

He saw me eyeing his chest and his lips turned up in a crooked smile. “Are you done? Or should I stand here a little longer while you ogle?”

“Not done ogling yet,” I said, a smirk playing on my own lips.

He chuckled, and then carefully pulled my shirt up over my head. “Well, I want to ogle, too.”

But he took one look at me and then took my hand, towing me toward the bedroom.

“Clay,” I said, resisting his pull.

He turned, raising an eyebrow in question.

“We’re alone,” I pointed out, my smile growing. “We don’t necessarily have to be in my room.”

He paused mid-stride, and turned around to walk back to where I’d stopped. He stared at me.

“Damn arm,” he growled. “I just want to pick you up right now and put you on the fucking kitchen counter.”

“Oh, well,” I smiled. “We’ll improvise.”

He bent down and captured my lips, covering them with his and tasting me with his tongue. He backed me up until I was standing against the refrigerator, and then braced his good hand next to my head. He kissed me openly, and I was weak in the knees by the time he moved his mouth back to my neck. He caught me around the waist when my legs betrayed me, and we slowly sank to the kitchen floor.

His lips were famished, and they moved from my neck to my collarbone as his hand slowly slid beneath the waistband of my leggings. His fingers curled around the waistband and he tugged. I reached down to help him remove them completely.

He took his time crawling slowly back up the length of my body, giving generous attention to the imperfect skin on my legs. The remnants of my burns were still visible there, as they probably always would be. Clay had fallen in love with me and wanted me in spite of the mottled skin, the impure shell of my body. I loved him so much for that, it hurt.

He paused on his way back up to my face, kissing the parts of my skin that were once a special kind of torture for me. I no longer hurt, and each touch of his lips sent a shiver of pleasure radiating through my body. He looked up at me after one of the shudders.

“You’re so gorgeous, Paige. I wouldn’t trade any part of you, because all of this makes you who you are. And who you are is a woman who was created perfectly for me.”

I sighed, closing my eyes with the emotion his words invoked. I told myself I wouldn’t cry, because tonight was about melding my body to his again.

“Come here,” I whispered, tugging on his neck so I could have him beside me again. He hovered over me, staring down into my eyes.

“I love you, baby,” he whispered. “So much.”

“Show me,” I ordered gently.

“Gladly.” He bent down and kissed me so slowly and deeply that everything else in the room just melted away into the background. Clay and I could have been on a mountaintop somewhere, or floating on a cloud in the sky. It didn’t matter. As long as I was with him, I felt safe and loved and wanted. Clay had an ability to make me feel that way in the midst of a storm, or in the total quiet of a moonlit night.

I ran my hands over his stomach again, savoring the harness of his muscles and the way they tensed under my hands. I sat up on my elbow in order to lean forward and kiss him there. I placed my lips on his skin, and then I froze.

“Clay?” I asked, my voice barely audible.

“Yeah?” His voice was just as soft as mine.

I stroked a finger over the inky mark on his skin that I knew had never been there before. It was located just below his ribcage, on the left side.

“How did I not notice before that you have a tattoo?”

He sat back, looking down at the mark and then back up at me. The corner of his mouth turned up in a rueful grin.

“Because I didn’t have it before. This is a recent addition.”

I peered closer. “Why did you get it?”

“Can you read it?”

I could. It was a picture of a large, detailed bird that I’d never seen before. The Old English script underneath had two sets of initials: ours. I gasped.

“What kind of bird is this?” I asked in disbelief.

He had my initials tattooed on his body. I struggled to catch my breath.

“It’s a Phoenix.” He put a finger under my chin in order to tilt my face up to look at him. “Because the love we share will rise again and again. No matter what happens to get in our way. I will always love you, and I will always pursue you. So it doesn’t matter what the world throws at us. We’ll rise again. Just like a phoenix.”

I gaped at him. When a lone tear rolled down my cheek, he brushed it away with his thumb.  “That’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard.”

He claimed my lips again, easing me back onto the floor. And then, in the midst of our heated kiss, he rose, grabbing me with him, wrapping my legs around his waist as he stood.

“Your arm,” I mumbled against his mouth.

“I got you,” he murmured, holding me up with one arm. “I’ve always got you.”

He walked, still kissing me, to the couch, where he laid me gently against the cushions. He dashed back across the room, reaching into his discarded jeans pocket and pulling out a square of foil. Ripping it open, he approached me again. Rolling the condom on, he then lowered himself above me. He hovered there for a full minute, just taking me in with his eyes.

“Beautiful,” he said quietly, to himself more than to me. Then he plunged inside me with one swift movement, and we both cried out at the pleasure of it.

He paused, closing his eyes tightly, and I squeezed his hardness gently with unseen muscles to urge him to move. His eyes flew open again, and he drew a ragged breath.

“Again, baby,” he said. “Do that again.”

So I squeezed my interior muscles together again, and he groaned in response.

“Jesus,” he said, his voice strained. “You are going to kill me.”

We rocked together slowly, slowly, our eyes locked so that we could read the other’s emotions like the open books we both were. And as the pressure inside both of us grew and grew, I began to whimper Clay’s name. The moment of ecstasy washed over me like a wave I was riding, and I closed my eyes against it, just as I heard Clay cry out and felt him begin to tremble.

When he collapsed on top of me, kissing my neck and my collarbone softly, I squeezed him so tightly I know it must have hurt his ribs.

This man was mine again. And I couldn’t let him go. Not ever.

Clay

I basked in the sweetness that was Paige that entire night. I slept, and then I would wake up and squeeze her to me or kiss her shoulder or hand, whatever was closest. Then I would doze off again, only to wake later to repeat the ritual. She was too much for me. She was too good for me. She was everything I would ever need.

When she finally stirred next to me, the sun’s rays glowing softly across her face as the morning stood upon us, my eyes were already locked on hers.

“Good morning, my little phoenix,” I greeted her.

“Hey,” she smiled and stretched her good arm into the air. “It is a good morning, isn’t it?”

I brushed her cheek with my fingertips. “Very.”

“Do you want to get up and have some breakfast?”

“No,” I answered nonchalantly.

“No?”

“I want to stay in bed all day with you.”

Her smile grew, and she opened her mouth to speak. Just as she did, my cell phone jangled.

I puffed a sigh, grabbing it off of the nightstand. “Hello.”

“Clay,” my mother’s voice greeted me.

“What is it, Mom?”

“I hope you’re well this morning. Your father and I would like to take you out to dinner this evening. We have your car to give you. And we’d like to talk to you about some things as well.”

“Alright,” I sighed. “Just tell me where. Paige and I can meet you around six.”

“Actually, we’d prefer if you came alone. Paige would just be bored with all this business we’ll be discussing.”

“Mom, you’ve lost your mind if you think I’m leaving Paige--”

A tug on my arm gave me pause. Paige was sitting up in bed watching me. She shook her head slightly and pointed to the phone.

I took it away from my ear. “What? I’m not leaving you to go have dinner with them. You can come too.”

She shook her head again. “Don’t fight with her over me, Clay. I don’t want that. I have some things I need to do around here today, anyway.”

I eyed her suspiciously for a minute, and then I put the phone back to my ear.