Severing Sanguine: A Companion Book to The Fallocaust Series Book 2 (3 page)

A lump started to rise in my throat I turned and started to run towards the boys but I suddenly stopped and turned back around, just in time to see the lizard escape into a crag of boulders and yellow bushes.

He was gone, my friend had gone back to his home; he didn’t want to play with me anymore even though I fed him.

My lips pursed and I made two fists. I whirled around and with a bellow of rage I started chasing the two boys who had ducked beside their dorm rooms.

“You made me drop him! He was my friend!” I couldn’t help the tears burning in my eyes as I chased the two older boys. I pivoted and looked around before hearing the dorm room door slam.

Nursing a sore head and an even sorer hurt in my heart, I burst into the room and looked around, my shoulders hunched and my face a blaze of anger.

“The freak is going to get us! Get your freak spray!” Gabe hollered. A moment later Pauly jumped out of a cabinet holding a Super Soaker and started spraying me with it.

And that was it for me. I burst into tears and ran from the dorm room, hiccupping and gasping as I made my way to the main house.

To my whimpering relief Nana was there, always wearing her red dress and usually holding a wooden spoon, not just for her cooking but for whacking any bad kids on the butt with.

“Oh my, what now, Sami?” Nan sighed. She kneeled down and opened her arms and with a sob I ran into them. Caringly she picked me up and rocked me back and forth as I cried on her shoulder.

In between my sobs and gasps I told Nan what happened taking special emphasis on the fact that they were solely responsible for me losing my new pet lizard. By the time I was finished I had dampened Nan’s red dress and had snot running down my face.

Eventually I let Nan put me down; she put on her cooking apron and used it to wipe my nose.

“Sami, you’re not a freak.” Nan kneeled down and started wiping the ash off of my tear-stained cheek. “Come here, now that you’ve stopped that bawling you can help me dry some more rat jerky.”

That was fun and yum too. I nodded and started helping Nan hang up the dried pieces of meat. When she wasn’t looking I snuck some. I liked the thick ones because they were the juiciest and sometimes I licked the blood at the bottom of the bucket we used. I liked doing it in front of the girls because it made them scream and run away and that was funny.

I reached a hand in and grabbed a big red piece and popped it into my mouth. I wanted more so I tried to grab a small piece Nan wouldn’t notice but with a quick hand she rapped my finger with her wooden spoon. I squawked and jumped back but because I knew I deserved it I only scrunched my face at her.

Nan gave me her warning eyes and shook her spoon at me.

“He prefers to eat the meat raw.”

I turned around and shrunk down as I saw Gill standing beside the back door of the main house. The greywaster hunter was giving me a dirty look, though I was used to it now. Gill was a bad man who sometimes kicked and yelled at me whenever Nan wasn’t looking. I had never told Nan though because Gill was a grown-up and if there was one thing I knew for truth it was that grown-ups were always right and they knew what they were doing. I knew he didn’t like me but Nan liked me, and she was my Nana and I liked her too.

“It doesn’t matter how he eats his food, Gill, as long as he’s getting food in him,” Nan said with an edge to her voice. I scurried over to her and once again started helping her hang up strips of red flesh and I didn’t eat any more of it. The entire backyard of the main house was dedicated to drying rat meat. It was an enclosed area surrounded by a fly net being held up by old wooden boards and camper van which Spooky the old grey dog lived in. He helped keep the wild animals out and he liked to eat the flies. I ate a fly once but just once.

“Yesterday he was chewing on the corpse bones like a wild animal. He’s a little monster not a–”

“Not in front of the boy!”

I jumped; I hated hearing Nana’s angry tone. I shrunk away and went to one of the black trees. I leaned against it and I watched with wide eyes as Nan angrily started hanging up the rat strips.

“Linda, we’ve had almost a hundred orphans and never once did we have one like him,” Gill snapped. I cowered down further as the hunter gave me a withering gaze. “He’s a bad seed. I watch him when no one’s…”

“Get out of here, Gill; I don’t want to hear it.” Nan’s eyes were wide with anger. If it was me making her give the scary eyes I would’ve gotten a spoon-beating. Just last week Missy spoiled a whole batch of yeast and, boy, she couldn’t sit properly yet still.

Gill made a frustrated noise and threw down the rag he had been holding. He stomped inside and slammed the screen door so hard a tile fell off of the roof and made Spooky jump from his nap.

That night I lay in my bed, a small plastic car bed that I had gotten after Josh got typhoid and died, now it was my bed which was high up in a loft room that was all mine. I liked it because I was high above in the heights and I liked that. I also could hear people coming because of the creaking stairs and I liked knowing when people were coming in case I was doing something bad.

Nana came to kiss me good night; she walked around and did an inspection of my room.

“What’s that damn smell?”

I shifted around on my bed and shrugged.

“It smells like rotting meat, have you been hiding food again?”

I shook my head back and forth.

“Sami.”

I stared at her.

“Sami
.”

My face flushed with embarrassment. I thought she wouldn’t notice. I buried my head into my Power Rangers pillow and pointed to behind my dresser.

I heard rustling so I put the pillow over my head and closed my eyes. I heard Nan sigh and the smell get worse.

“Sami, I know this winter we were short on food but you don’t need to… to steal bones. You couldn’t even eat these bones they’ll break your teeth. They’re all green now too – oh Sami, they have worms on them.” Nan didn’t sound angry but she sounded sad and that was worse. I kept my head buried.

“No more hiding bones. I told you this when you hid that rat’s entrails… no hiding meat you’ll get trideath. Do you want trideath?” Nan lifted up the pillow from my face but I didn’t look at her.

I shook my head and stared at my hands. She leaned in and kissed my cheek and I heard her throw the bones out of the window. Out the window meant that Spooky could eat them and that was okay.

Then I perked up when she grabbed Barry, my bear. She wound the dial on his butt and put him beside my dresser. He could play music and it was my favourite song.

Daisy, Daisy

Give me your heart to do.

I’m half-crazy, all for the love of you.

It won’t be a stylish marriage,

I can’t afford a carriage,

But you’ll look so sweet,

Upon a seat,

Of a bicycle built for two.

But I sang it different in my head because marriage was gross and so were girls, and we didn’t have bikes here, only in magazines.

“Not like you even deserve that bear’s music with those bones I found,” Nan said sternly. I shrunk down on my bed and picked up my pillow again.

Nan turned to leave; I watched her go.

“Nana… am I a monster?”

Nan paused and turned around. “I told you not to listen to Gill or the other kids.”

I shrugged and grabbed onto my feet; I started pulling on my toes. “Why do they all hate me?”

She was quiet for a moment; I pulled on my big toe and pressed the nail until it hurt.

“Because you look different and sometimes people like picking on different people,” Nan explained. She walked over to me and sat down on my car bed; she brushed back my messy black hair. Barry’s song was still playing behind us.

“Why do I look different?” I asked.

“That’s just how you were born. Just like Pauly and Gabe have green eyes and Missy has blond hair, like me and Richard have black skin but you all have white skin. We’re all greywasters and arian humans and that’s all that matters, doesn’t it?” Nan thought for a second. “All humans taste the same don’t they?”

I nodded.

“Then if we all taste the same and inside we’re all the same… then why do differences matter? Why does eye colour matter? You’ll taste just like the rest of us.” As she said this she pinched my side which made me laugh. Nan smiled at this and kissed my cheek.

“You’re not a monster, my Sami, and don’t let anyone ever tell you that you are. You’re a good boy, okay?”

I smiled and nodded and jumped under my covers.

Nana tucked me in but I had something else to ask her.

“Nan, my mom said my name was Sami, right?”

Nan nodded. “That’s right, she got sick and passed away and put you in a little green milk crate.”

I twisted under my covers; I didn’t know why but I felt embarrassed saying it so I hid my head under the covers. “I think my name is Sanguine. I call me Sanguine in my head.”

Nan laughed and pulled my covers down. “That’s not your name. Your name is Sami just like the note said but you can call yourself anything you want in your head. Just don’t ask Nana to call you such a funny name.”

Nan tickled my sides so I laughed too. I said good night to her after with
Daisy Daisy
playing in the background.

Sami

Age 6

I peeked my head out of the door frame and saw that Nan was spreading jam onto rat meat to make it candied. She was busy which was exactly what I wanted! I tiptoed away from the door frame and jumped off of the porch. I ran past Missy and Richard and into Gill’s small cabin that was across the street from the boys’ dorm.

Gill had left a week ago with some other hunters to make a journey to the borderlands, most particularly a town called Redrock. They were there to fuel up on supplies so we could get through the winter. I had just been walking past his window and not looking in it at all, but I found something I wanted to take a closer look at.

I put my hands on the window frame, the wood old and just waiting to give you a splinter, and the paint cracked like a lake bottom. I pulled the window open and was greeted by the smell of old newspapers and unrinsed cans. Gill always smelled the same way; his cabin smelled like him.

With one last good listen to make sure I was all alone, I crawled in through the window and into the cabin. Immediately I snatched what I wanted and in a flash I was outside of Gill’s house and home free. I stuffed the rubber cement into my jacket pocket with the matches and the spray paint and with a grin, and a giddy feeling in my chest, I headed to the outskirts of Sunshine House.

I couldn’t hide my smile; the same smile every kid got whenever they were up to no good. I knew I was being bad and that Nan would paddle my ass if she found out what I was doing but this was just too thrilling to pass up.

Today was a warm day with flies buzzing all around me and the grey sun beaming its light down on us. Yesterday I had found an honest-to-goodness sunbeam and I laid in it for an hour before the clouds came and it disappeared. Sunbeams were a rare treat, it wasn’t often the sun was strong enough to break through its cloak of dust and ash. Usually Spooky or some of the cats laid in it and when they were I let them because I think it meant a lot to them to feel sun.

There were no sunbeams today, though I had more on my mind. I sprinted towards an old shack that the kids and me used for a play fort and ran behind it.

They were still there! I wasn’t really sure where else they would go but since I had all of my tools it was important that they were where I had left them.

An ant hill! I jitterated with excitement and felt like a god as I towered over them. I put my hands on my hips and glared down at my subjects. To show them I was no merciful god I tapped the side of the hill with my boot.

A couple of the ants stuck to my boot which made me flail. I hated ants! I hated their gross sectioned bodies, their waving antennas. I hated how they walked around like slaves and I hated how they bit me. I also hated how they crunched when you stepped on them; that put my teeth on edge and made me want to scream. I had a personal vendetta against ants especially black ants and unfortunately since it was sandy ash here and lots of old buildings we got ants every summer. Everywhere!

So I was now a god to them and I was an angry god!

“I banish you to the fires of hell! For I am demon boy!” I exclaimed, though I tried to keep my voice down. I got out the rubber cement, with a faded blue label and a tip that was covered in gumminess, and sprayed it on the black ant hill. I chewed on my cheek with my back teeth, now adult and sharpy.

The subjects didn’t care at first but I think the smell started to piss them off. All at once the thousands of black ants started to move quicker around the ant hill. They were one giant swarm of black that almost dazzled my eyes on the backdrop of grey ash and pieces of yellow grass they had gathered for their hill. So tight of a cluster they were like one continuous moving ball I shuddered at the thought of accidently falling in.

I squirted some more rubber cement onto it before putting it back into my pocket, then I took out the black spray paint and the lighter. I grinned and flicked the flint of the lighter until I wielded a small yellow flame. I held it out and shook the paint a few times before aiming the lighter and the aerosol can for a practice go.

I gasped when I roar of fire erupted from the spray paint combined with the lighter. I stood there for a moment in absolute shock before a nervous giggle reached my lips. I looked around with a cold adrenaline pushing me forward and pointed it to the angry ant hill. Then, with a grin, I pressed down on the trigger and shot a spurt of pure yellow and orange flames onto the unsuspecting black ants.

I held it there and watched the anthill start to burn underneath the searing chemical heat. The ants all running around in every direction, some I could see melting from the flames. They were in a desperate panic, slowly and painfully roasting alive under my own hand. I was a god and I had condemned them to death for doing nothing more than existing when I had decided they were not worthy of it.

Though as I held the spray paint, a hiss of black coming from the can before becoming the equivalent to a flamethrower, I felt something different. A light inside of me that I didn’t understand but felt compelled to foster. There was something about these flames that was giving me a rush of pleasure; it was tickling parts of my body and mind that nothing else did. I didn’t know what it was or why it was happening, but I felt an almost inhuman compulsion to make it happen to me again and again.

So I didn’t stop. I embraced this electricity illuminating my body and continued to make the flames.

Then a sharp pain. I stopped abruptly and dropped the spray paint can. I shook my hand and looked at it, it was covered in spray paint and my fingers were smoking. I rubbed the aching hand against my jeans before stuffing them in my jacket.

I turned back to my anthill and admired what I had destroyed. I even stepped back as I saw some half-melted ants try to flee their burning home. They were doomed to die a slow death so I didn’t squish them myself. The lizards in the rocks or the animals here could eat them, so in a way I was a generous god because I was feeding the other animals too.

I bet I killed thousands today,
I said to myself with a smile, squinting under the sting of the smoke and heavy chemicals.

I stuffed both hands into my pockets and enjoyed the charred, burning anthill sending smoke up into the sky. The ants were still churning like little black candles and moving pieces of coal.

Then I looked behind the smoking anthill and realized the wall that the anthill was up against was charred black. I picked up the paint can again and shook it. I tried to spray it onto the wall but the can was only blowing out chemically air now, so I put it in my pocket, made sure I had the lighter, and turned to run away.

“What the fuck are you doing, mutant?”

I froze and looked up with wide eyes.

Pauly and Gabe were both there. Now in their early teens they were big and tall, much bigger than me. I looked at both of them before turning to run away.

Pauly grabbed my arm and I tried to pull it away but Gabe grabbed my other. They took my spray paint and my rubber cement and threw it onto the ground.

“That’s Gill’s shit; you fucking stole from Gill? He already wants your ass for a feast, dumb shit. He’s going to beat you to death,” Pauly snapped. He shook my arm making my eyes rattle in my head. I tried to pull back but their grips were as tight as Nana’s.

“Let me go!” I hollered. “I’ll scream for Nan!”

“Ohhh, Nan’s pet demon-monkey is going to call for his saviour? And then what?” Gabe walked over to the still smoking anthill and clucked his tongue. “What will Nan say when she hears you almost burned down the shack? You won’t be her little Samikins after that, huh?”

This got me. I felt a lump in my throat as I thought of Nan and what she would do to me. Nan would be disappointed and that was the worst feeling. Everyone here hated me because I was a bad kid but that didn’t mean I liked proving to everyone I was bad.

No! They were just stupid ants I wasn’t bad and Gill was an asshole and he was mean to me so he deserved it!

Gabe and Pauly started pulling me towards the anthill laughing. I tried to pull my arms away and even wiggle out of my jacket but they had me good.

“Eat one and we won’t tell Nan. Go on!” They pushed my face into the anthill and held it near. This scared me, I hated ants. I didn’t want to be this close to them. I turned my face to the side but they only pushed me further towards the smoking ant hill.

“No!” I coughed, the chemicals were making my eyes sting and my nose burn. I coughed again but that only made the now blackened yellow grass blow ash into my face.

“Eat it, mutant!” Gabe taunted. “You shouldn’t kill animals and not eat them that’s a waste. Go on, demon-monkey, have a bite!”

“Fuck off!” I screamed even though that was a bad word. I yelled as I felt something brush against my cheek before a spasm of desperation and anxiety rippled through me. The thing was moving; there were ants right under my cheek. They were crawling they were going to bite me!

I burst into tears and I only cried harder when I heard them laughing. I squirmed around desperately but when I moved my head I only felt the tickling brushes of feet and antenna on my nose. I huffed out a huge breath from my nose to try and get them away but that only disturbed more smoking ash.

Then dizziness and nausea. The chemical smoke choking my breathing and my vision, and before I could stop any of it everything went black. I think I had passed out.

When I woke up Nan was sitting on one of my chairs, a wooden chair with white paint that I painted myself last year. It was the chair Nan sat on when she read me books and told me stories from when she was little. Though Nan wasn’t smiling like she usually did, when I woke up she was frowning. Nana was already the oldest person I knew and she had wrinkles and her frowns made her wrinkles worse.

My eyes were stinging awful and my face was tight whenever I moved it. I whimpered and Nan looked up and immediately gave me some water.

“Be still. You have some burns on the side of your face and neck but they’ll heal,” Nan said quietly. “Drink all the water and rest.”

I slurped the water which felt good on my lips and drank the entire glass. I gave her the glass back and lay back down on my bed. I was almost too big for my car bed but Nan said I could have it until I turned nine and then I would be too big for it.

“Sami…”

I looked up at Nan and pulled my blankets to my chin; she was using her ‘talking to’ voice with me and I knew I was in for it.

“Pauly and Gabe shouldn’t have even grabbed me! If they hadn’t followed me no one would know!” I suddenly said. I pulled the blankets over my head so she couldn’t see me. “So you shouldn’t even know. That means it never happened, and – and my name isn’t Sami, my name is Sanguine.”

Nan sighed before I felt her try and pull the covers off of my face. “Sami, it isn’t that… I had to clear the ash away from your nose and mouth and…” She paused. “Do you realize your adult teeth are growing in differently than the other boys?”

I shrugged but my tongue was running along the gaps where my baby teeth had fallen out. I had four adult teeth in the back and they were pointy and sometimes they pierced my tongue. I liked they were pointy because it made eating the jerky easier and tough meat too. I liked chewing on things with them because sometimes while they were growing in my mouth itched.

“They’re growing in… pointed.” Nan said this last part differently than the other parts. “Your two front teeth you just lost last week. They’ll…” She sighed and I felt anxious when she lowered her head. I didn’t know what I did bad; I thought I was going to get a spanking for stealing from Gill.

She put a hand on my chin and told me to open my mouth. I opened it and her face became sadder as she tilted my chin. “It looks like that’s it for you having those two front biting teeth. I can see them starting to peek through, all the same size and pointed as all hell. Oh, what am I going to do, what am I going to do…” She dropped my chin and buried her face in her hands.

“Nana, I’m sorry I stole from Gill,” I said and patted her knee. “Don’t be sad. I’ll put it back where I found it and we can say he ran out and forgot, ran out of the – the rubber cement and the spray paint.”

If it wasn’t for Gabe and Pauly being nosey and bullying me Nan wouldn’t be sad and none of this would’ve ever happened. I was going to pay them back for this – it all was their fault for making Nana sad.

And now Nan was upset with me. I hated that, it made my stomach hurt and it made me squirm and dig my fingers into my toenails again.

“No, Sami… I’ll tell Gill in secret,” Nan said quietly. She lifted up her face from her hands and gave me a smile. “I’ll think of something, just don’t tell any of the boys or the girls about your adult teeth. Can you promise this to Nan?”

I was a bit taken back by this. “Why, Nanny?”

Nan was quiet for a second. “Well, because it’s another way you’re different, Sami. And I know the older boys give you a hard enough time already. Nana doesn’t want to give them more of a reason. Just… tell me if more teeth fall out, okay? And if the boys ask questions just close your mouth and run to me even if it’s late at night.”

“When’s Gill coming back?” I asked

Nan stood, she looked tired. “Gill is going to be slow coming back. It looks like we might have another rough winter. The Ratmeal from Skyfall is delayed and we’ll be lucky to have enough food to last us the winter.”