Sex, Marriage and Family in World Religions (66 page)

Of course, in thinking about how stacks of variously defined families develop and forge working relations with one another, we should not overlook a theme that Hegel and Freud developed: More complex and universal forms of social arrangement, such as “a people” or a nation, seem to grow out of the more basic family structure and mimic family structures, even as they seek to place themselves above that primary family structure, both as its caretaker and gov-ernor. If we take this supposition as a starting place, then we may have good reason to see that once patriarchal claims to own truth and the right to legislate identity have been complicated by reproducing
themselves
in this sequence of ever more rarefied versions of patriarchy that move away from the at-home template, it shouldn’t surprise us that there is an equally prominent discourse explaining something close to “the sin of life” in which truth, purity, and legit-imate identity are defined as masculine and ethereal and certainly far from the zones of materiality, women, and sensuality that are inevitably a part of at-home patriarchy. Buddhism, in short, takes its place among many religions that both cares deeply about the family but denigrates it in its effort to establish itself as the site of ultimate authority and value.

THE BEGINNING OF THE WORLD

Though it is widely said, and correctly so, that Buddhism lacks a definitive creation story, it is also true that the following selection is a widely known 310

account of how our world came to be. This story, apparently already present in rather early strata of Buddhist literature, perhaps as early as the second century b c e, explains that within the wider cycles of the creation and destruction of our universe, the particularities of human existence derive from altogether du-bious actions. In particular, this narrative of the genesis of our world shows, in a gnostic sort of way, that humans descended from beings made of light that only slowly took physical form as the result of desire and greed. In depicting this gradual “fall of man,” the narrative offers an etiology of the major problem-atic elements of human life, including the body, family, sexuality, ownership, and political order. Above all, the story offers the reader the viewpoint that though s/he may currently be rather involved in the material world, it is still the case that all humans have their true origins in a more ethereal, noncorporeal condition, thereby implying that life as we know it is but an ad hoc condition that can be overcome in favor of the ease and finality of nirvana.

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O monks, eventually there comes a time when, after a long period, this world starts to wind down. And as the world is winding down, beings for the most part are reborn out of it, in the Realm of the Radiant Gods. Eventually, after another long period, it happens that this world that has ended begins to reevolve. And as it is reevolving, settling, and becoming established, certain beings, in order to work out their karma, fall from the Realm of the Radiant Gods and come to be once again in this world. These beings by nature are self-luminescent and move through the air. They are made of mind, feed on joy, dwell in bliss, and go where they will.

When at first they reappear, there is no knowledge in the world of the sun and the moon. And likewise there is no knowledge of the forms of the stars, of the paths of the constellations, of night and day, month and fortnight, seasons and years. . . .

Eventually, this Great Earth appears; it is like a pool of water. It is pretty and savory and tastes just like pure sweet honey, and in physical appearance it is like the scum on milk or ghee.

Now, monks, it happens that a certain being, fickle and greedy by nature, tastes some of this earth-essence with his finger. He enjoys its color, its smell, and its savor. Then other beings, seeing what he has done, imitate him. They also taste some of the earth-essence with their fingers, and they too take pleasure in its color, its smell, its savor.

Then, on another occasion, that being takes a morsel of earth-essence and eats it, and the other beings too, seeing what he has done, imitate him. . . . And because they take morsels of earth-essence and eat them, in due course their
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bodies become heavy, solid, and hard, and their former qualities—of being self-luminescent, of moving through the air, being made of mind, feeding on joy, dwelling in bliss, and going where they will—disappear. And when this happens, the sun and the moon and likewise the forms of the stars, the paths of the constellations, night and day, month and fortnight, seasons and years come to be known in the world.

Now, monks, for a very long time these beings continue to consume this earth-essence. It is their food, what they eat, and it shapes them. Those who eat a lot of it take on an ugly appearance, whereas those who consume only a little of it become good looking. And the ones who are good looking become contemptuous of those who are ugly. “We are handsome,” they declare, “and you look bad.” While they go on in this way, convinced of their own superior beauty, proud and arrogant, the earth-essence disappears. And there appear instead “earth-puffs,” which are like mushrooms. They are pretty and sweet smelling and taste just like pure honey. . . .

Now, monks, for a very long time, these beings continue to consume this creeper. . . . And those who eat a lot of it take on an ugly appearance, whereas those who consume only a little of it become good looking. And the ones who are good looking become contemptuous of those who are ugly. “We are handsome,” they declare, “and you look bad.” While they go on in this way, convinced of their own superior beauty, proud and arrogant, the creeper disappears.

And there appears instead a rice that is huskless, polished, and sweet smelling.

If it is reaped in the evening, by daybreak it has grown back, sprouted, and ripened, as though it had never been cut. If it is reaped in the morning, by evening it has grown back, sprouted, and ripened, as though it had never been cut. [ . . . ]

Now monks, when those beings eat the rice that is huskless, polished, and sweet smelling, bodily features of femininity appear in those who are women, and bodily features of masculinity appear in those who are men. Then, overflowing thoughts of passion for each other arise in their minds; they are pleased with each other, consumed by passion for each other, and have illicit sex together.

Then, other beings see them having illicit sex together and throw sticks and clods of dirt and dust at them. . . . Nowadays, when a girl is carried off to be married, people throw sticks and clods of dirt. In this way, they repeat an ancient primeval custom without realizing the meaning of it. In former times, it was thought to be immoral, profane, and undisciplined, but nowadays it is deemed moral, sacred, and disciplined. . . .Then, it occurs to a certain being who has gone out to gather rice that he is needlessly wearying himself.

“Why,” he reflects, “should I go on tiring myself by getting rice for supper in the evening and rice for breakfast in the morning, when I could be gathering it for both evening and morning meals just once a day?” And that is what he begins to do.

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Then, one evening, some other being says to him: “Come, my friend, let’s go get some rice.”

But the first being replies: “You go, friend. I already brought back rice for both evening and morning meals.”

Then it occurs to that second being: “This is a wonderful way of doing things!

Why, I could be gathering rice all at once for two or three days!” And that is what he begins to do.

Then, monks, it happens that a third being says to him: “Come, my friend, let’s go get some rice.”

And he replies: “You go, my friend. I already brought back rice for two or three days.”

Then it occurs to that third being: “Now this is a wonderful way of doing things! Why, I could be gathering rice all at once for four or five days!” And that is what he begins to do.

But because these beings are now hoarding and consuming that rice that is huskless, polished, and sweet smelling, husks and reddish coatings begin to appear on it. And if it is reaped in the evening, by daybreak it has not sprouted, ripened, or grown back, and it is clear that it has been cut.

Then, those beings quickly assemble together and take counsel with one another: . . . “Now what if we were to divide the rice fields and draw boundaries between them?”

And that, monks, is what those beings do, declaring, “This field is yours, and this field is mine.”

Then it occurs to one of those beings who has gone to gather rice: “How will I get my livelihood if my allotment of rice is destroyed? Why don’t I now go and steal someone else’s rice?”

And so that being, while guarding his own share of rice, goes and steals somebody else’s portion. But another being happens to see him stealing that other person’s portion, and he goes up to him and says, “Ho, my friend, you have taken someone else’s rice!”

To which he replies: “Yes, my friend, but it will not happen again.” Nonetheless, it occurs a second time . . . and a third time. He goes and steals somebody else’s portion, and another being sees him. But this time, that other being goes up to him and beats him with a stick, and says: “This is the third time, friend, that you have taken someone else’s rice!”

Then that being holds up his arms, wails, and cries out: “Friends, immorality has appeared in the world! Irreligion has appeared in the world, for the taking up of sticks is now known!” But, the first being throws his stick on the ground, holds up his arms, wails, and cries out: “Friends, immorality and ir-religion have appeared in the world, because stealing and lying are now known!”

In this way, monks, these three evil and demeritorious things first come to be known in the world: theft, lying, and violence. . . .

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[The myth then goes on to recount the origins of kingship and the taxation system. The beings get together and decide they need to elect someone to maintain order in their world and mete out punishment where punishment is due. That person becomes the first “king,” known as the Great Elected One (Maha¯sammata), and is compensated for his role by being assigned a share of the crops of each of the beings in the world.]

[Translated in John S. Strong,
The Experience of Buddhism
(Belmont, CA: Wadsworth, 1995) , pp. 101–104]

THE JOYS OF ASCETICISM

In this short description of the wandering ascetic, often considered to belong to one of the oldest, if not the oldest, strata of Buddhist discourse, we see a stripped-down eulogy of the life of renunciation. The wandering mendicant is portrayed as one who has cast aside all attachments, including his family, friends, and his belongings. Equally important, he has cast away desire for these items, and instead delights in the free and easy life of the wanderer, totally released from social obligations and the searing pain of desire and longing.

Nonetheless, the narrative seems to speak knowingly of the charms of family life, though these pleasures are quickly denounced as truly threatening distrac-tions from the life of the lone ascetic who is glamorized as elephantlike in his presumably regal and important travels. Presumably the metaphor of the rhinoceros horn is to evoke the solitude, firmness, and force of the mendicant.

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Laying aside violence in respect of all beings, not harming even one of them, one should not wish for a son, let alone a companion. One should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn. Affection comes into being for one who has associations; following on affection, this misery arises. Seeing the peril (which is) born from affection, one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn. Sym-pathising with friends (and) companions [one misses one’s goal, being shackled in mind. Seeing the danger in acquaintance (with friends),] one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

[The consideration which (exists) for sons and wives is like a very wide-spreading bamboo tree entangled (with others). Like a (young) bamboo shoot not caught up (with others)], one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

As a deer which is not tied up goes wherever it wishes in the forest for pasture, an understanding man, having regard for his independence, should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

In the midst of companions, whether one is resting, standing, going (or) wandering, there are requests (from others). Having regard for the indepen-314

dence (which is) not coveted (by others), one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

In the midst of companions there are sport, enjoyment, and great love for sons. (Although) loathing separation from what is dear, one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

One is a man of the four quarters and not hostile, being pleased with whatever comes one’s way. A fearless bearer of dangers, one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

[Even some wanderers are not kindly disposed], and also (some) householders dwelling in a house. Having little concern for the children of others, one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

Having removed the marks of a householder, like a Kovil.a¯ra tree whose leaves have fallen, a hero, having cut the householder’s bonds, should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

If one can obtain a zealous companion, an associate of good disposition, (who is) resolute, overcoming all [dangers] one should wander with him, with elated mind, mindful. If one cannot obtain a zealous companion, an associate of good disposition, (who is) resolute, (then) like a king quitting the kingdom (which he has) conquered, one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

Assuredly let us praise the good fortune of (having) a companion; [friends better (than oneself) or equal (to oneself) are to be associated with. If one does not obtain these, (then) enjoying (only) blameless things], one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.

Seeing shining (bracelets) of gold, well-made by a smith, clashing together (when) two are on (one) arm, one should wander solitary as a rhinoceros horn.