Sex Snob (15 page)

“Can I finish?”

I remained quiet, signaling to him that he could. Though I was incredibly tempted to comment that, no, he clearly couldn’t “finish.”

“I’m going out with her tonight,” he blurted, knowing that this bit of information would tell me all that I needed to know.

“Holy shit, you really like her!”

“Yeah.
I mean, so far. I don’t know her that well. But I like what I know.”

“Wow.
Wow.
Wow
.”

“Have I rendered you speechless, Amanda?”
I could hear his smirk through the phone.

I hesitated, trying to formulate words that could properly convey what I was thinking.
“Wow.”

Kyle laughed loudly.
“I know, I know. It’s been awhile since I’ve taken anyone out on a date. I’m not sure I remember what to do.”

“Wow.”
I was going to be monosyllabic for a while.

“Jesus Christ, enough with the wows,” he said with mock exasperation.
“I have dated women before. Stop acting like I’ve just told you I saw Bigfoot.”

“I’d actually have an easier time digesting the Bigfoot thing.”

“Amanda.” Kyle’s tone was a warning. I was starting to piss him off.

God, he
really
liked her.
Kyle never got agitated with me. “Should I go rent my tux for the wedding? I
am
your best man, right?” I couldn’t resist.

“Okay, awesome.
I’m hanging up now.”

“No, no, Kyle, wait.
I’m sorry. I’ll be nice.”

He let out another sigh, but didn’t hang up.

“So where are you gonna take her?” The answer to this question would tell me a lot about Kyle’s feelings toward Kate.

“I made a reservation at Jones in the city.”

Bam! He’s totally into her.
Since we lived about forty minutes outside of the city
and
had just been there last night, I knew that Kyle must see something in Kate to drive all the way down there again. I was brimming with happiness for him. Kate was a good girl and I desperately wanted Kyle to be with someone who would treat him right. I would hate to have to kill a bitch for hurting him.

I couldn’t let him know this though.
It just wasn’t how I rolled. “You’re a bad friend.”

“Wait . . . What?”
Clearly, this was the last thing he expected me to say.

“You heard me.
You’re a bad friend,” I pouted.

“How does any of this make me a bad friend?”
Confusion rippled through his voice.

“Because I told you months ago that I wanted to go to Jones and you never took me.
I suffer through having sex with you all of the time, and what do I get for my trouble? Nothing. But Kate doesn’t even put out and she gets to go? Oh, the injustice of it all,” I wailed for dramatic effect.

“Are you done?”

“I guess,” I replied simply. “So, are you super nervous?”

“Nervous.
No, I’m not in high school.”

“Adults get nervous,” I defended.

“When was the last time you got nervous?”

“I’m a bad example. Wait, no I’m not. I was nervous today when I went rock climbing.”

“That’s because you’re a dumbass.
Who goes rock climbing when they’re scared of heights?”

It was frightening how well he knew me.

“Who did you go with anyway?” he continued curiously.

“Shane.”

“Oh really?” This piqued Kyle’s interest.

“Yes, really.
He told me last night he was going, and I told him I always wanted to try it, so we went.

“That’s it?” Kyle prodded.

“Yes, that’s it. Now, back to more important things.” I maneuvered the conversation back to him and Kate and what he had planned for the evening. He was clearly excited. I was happy for him. Just as we were saying our goodbyes and about to hang up, I needed to add one more thing. “Kyle?”

“Yeah?”

“I think this is going to be great. You and Kate. I have a good feeling about it.”

“Thanks.
I needed that.”

I knew he did.
That’s why I had said it. But that didn’t stop it from being the truth. And as I hung up the phone, I thought,
My little Kyle is all grown up.

***

The rest of the day passed without anything exciting happening. Actually, the rest of the week passed like that.

Work was significantly less interesting without Hot
Rod around to ogle. And everyone else seemed to be on auto-pilot, dragging their bones around the office like they were slowly becoming zombies. Master Bader was his usual glowing self. After calling me into his office for some lame reason and talking my ear off about his coin collection, I was ready to blow my brains out. But when he started rambling on about his yearly trip to the Poconos for a Boy Scout reunion, I began daydreaming about blowing
his
brains out. Surely, no one would miss him. Except maybe the sock next to his bed. But I’m sure even that thing would appreciate a reprieve.

The only thing I looked forward to was going to CrossFit.
And though I tried to tell myself it was because I felt so good after the workouts, I knew that was a bunch of shit. I looked forward to seeing Shane more than I would have ever admitted to anyone. Why
did he have to be so
hot
?

Though, at this point, my attraction to him was beyond just the physical.
I was drawn to every aspect of him. The way he walked, talked, laughed, fucked (granted, this attraction was based solely off my dreams), the list was endless. I definitely had a crush on Shane, but it was nothing more than that. I reminded myself of this as I sat in my car before classes that week, taking deep breaths and giving myself mental pep talks to refrain from throwing him to the floor and sitting on his face.
Definitely just a crush.

Tuesday’s class was disappointing though.
I arrived only two minutes before my class began, (well, five, but the deep breathing ate away three minutes) so I didn’t get to banter with Shane before class. And he made the workout so difficult, I didn't have any extra air to insult him during class either. Then, after class ended, he was assaulted by the bimbo brigade as they asked him to feel their muscles for tightness.
Pathetic.
All I got was a quick wave as I clomped out the door.

Wednesday’s class was even worse because Shane wasn’t there at all.
Brock was running class. I hated Brock. And not fake hated, like I did Shane. This was real bone-crushing, voodoo doll-making hate. He was a pompous little smidge of a man who thought he was cool shit with his Paleo brownies and veiny arms. He looked like he was covered in blue worms. He normally ran the afternoon classes so I didn’t have to deal with him much, even though he hung around the gym a lot.

“Where’s Shane,” I asked in disgust.
I’ve never been good at hiding my feelings. I’d work on it if I cared more. I didn’t.

“He needed the night off.
That okay with you?”

I just rolled my eyes in response, not wanting to speak to him any longer than was necessary.
The class passed slowly, with Brock barely watching us perform the movements. I could’ve spent class standing on my head spitting wooden nickels, and he wouldn’t have noticed anything out of the ordinary.

About midway through class, I saw Kate walk out of the office and begin to circulate among us.

“Why didn’t you run class?” I whispered as she walked past me.

“I had to get the billing sorted out.” She made a face that let me know she had enjoyed doing that about as much as I enjoyed being near Brock. I didn’t ask her where Shane was. I thought that would look suspicious. God knows I didn’t want Shane knowing I
actually
missed him. And I wouldn't put it past Kate to tell him.

When class ended, I walked past Brock. “Are you going to be here tomorrow?” I uttered with contempt.

“No, your precious Shane will be back,” he said mockingly.

“Thank God.
I’d rather be trained by Richard Simmons than deal with you again.”

“Ha, training?
Is that what you call it? I thought you were just here to pick up guys.”

His comment riled me.
I had never picked up a guy at CrossFit Force. Well, there had been that one guy, but that wasn’t important now. I went through a phase of going after anyone with dimples and who sported a clear outline of their dick in workout shorts. I wasn't proud of it. I put on my best come-hither smile and batted my lashes, “Jealous?”

“Of what,” he scoffed.

I leaned in close, “Of the fact that I wouldn’t even
fuck you with someone else’s pussy.” And with Brock speechless, I turned and left.

***

I fared markedly better on Thursday. I arrived ten minutes early, just as the previous class was finishing up. As Kate recorded how many rounds they had completed, Shane wandered over to me.

“Bishop,” he nodded his hello.

“Where the hell were you yesterday?” I was so tactful sometimes.

“Uh, at my brother's.
It was his birthday."

Relief spread through me. In my mind, he had run off to a deserted island to elope with a Victoria's Secret model. But I covered my true feelings in the best way I knew how: with sarcasm. “Well, in the future, could you possibly get an axe-murderer to cover your classes instead of Brock?
He’s a total douche.”

“Nah, he’s a good guy.”

I shot Shane an icy glare.

“Or not,” he laughed.

“So what have you been up to?” I asked, feigning disinterest as I stretched.

“Nothing much.
Just being here, like always.” His words would’ve suggested that he was bored with his routine, but his tone didn’t. It was clear that he loved being here, doing what he did. “What about you?”

“Same old.”
My tone didn’t carry the same enthusiasm.

“Any plans for the weekend?”

“Yeah, a group of us are going to the pool hall Saturday night. I think Kate’s going. You wanna come?”
Yeah, Shane, do you wanna “come”?

“What time?”

“I don’t know. I don’t really excel with details. I rely on Lily to get me places on time. Kate,” I called, “did Kyle say what time everybody was meeting Saturday?”

“He said around eight.”

“Around eight,” I said trying to pretend that I was the source of the information.

“I don’t know,” he hawed. "I was invited out with some other friends."

“What? Are you scared,” I asked, casting a sideways look at him. I couldn't let him choose other "friends" over me. What if there were going to be girls there?

“Of what?
A pool hall?”

“That I’ll embarrass you with my mad pool skills.”

“Your mad pool skills, huh? Why, Amanda, it kind of sounds like you’re challenging me."

“Oh, I’m definitely challenging.
”

“Yeah, you sure are.
In every way imaginable.” He laughed at his little joke as I narrowed my eyes at him.

“What’s it going to be, Reed?
You up for an ass kicking or what?”

“In your dreams.”

Well, he hit the nail on the head with that one.
He and his ass had made numerous appearances in my dreams lately.

He continued, “I’ll be there.
I can’t resist schooling you in front of all your friends. I’ll get the name of the place from Kate, since you clearly don’t know anything,”
he said over his shoulder as he walked away.

And as he got class underway, all I could think about was how wrong he was.
I definitely knew something: I was going to beat Shane Reed’s ass in pool.

Seven

“Who are you all dressed up for, Lil?” I pulled myself away from the bathroom mirror to see her emerge from her bedroom. “We’re just goin’ to the pool hall.”

“Nobody,” she said with a sly grin as she put in her other earring.
“Can’t a girl just look nice?”

“Nobody, my ass.
You look
hot
.”

“Do I?” she spun around like a girl on prom night.

The truth was
, Lily
did
look great. And it wasn’t just the fact that her fitted white ankle pants and small heels made her legs look even longer than they already were. She emitted an inner radiance that I hadn’t seen in her in months. Her hazel eyes glowed when she smiled. She truly looked beautiful, inside and out. Of course, I’d never actually
say
any of that, so I went with, “Yeah, you totally do. If I were a guy, I’d fuck you.”

She laughed loudly and put her hands over her heart as she batted her long lashes and spoke with a sweet southern accent.
“Aww, you really know how to make a girl feel special.”

“So is the new mystery man comin’ tonight or what?
I’m dying to meet the guy who can put a smile like that on Lily Hamilton’s face. He must be
damn
good in bed.”

“No, I might go out with him afterward, though.
And who said I was sleeping with him?”

“Who said you
weren’t
?”

She was eager to change the subject.
“Let’s talk about who
you
may or may not be sleeping with, shall we? A certain Shane Reed will be there tonight, right?”

“Shane?”
I laughed out loud. Though I wasn’t laughing internally. I had actually imagined sleeping with Shane quite a few times lately, and none of those times involved me laughing. “Nothing’s going on between us. He’s just a friend.” My eyes returned to the bathroom mirror as I straightened another section of my blonde hair. I was afraid if Lily saw my face, my expression might reveal something I didn’t want her to see. Something
I
didn’t want to see either. But as I stared at my reflection, I had no choice but to see it.

“Yeah, a friend you’d like to fuck.”
She entered the bathroom and nudged me with her elbow, causing me to just miss burning the side of my forehead with the straightener. Wouldn’t have been the first time.

“That’s what I have Kyle for,” I said simply.
“Now how do I look?” I said as I finished off my make-up with a little tinted lip-gloss. I had tried to dress simply: jeans and a loose pastel pink and white striped shirt that hung off my shoulder. I was going for cute but casual.

She took a step back and put a finger to her lips,
squinting her eyes and studying me closely for a few moments before answering. “If I were a guy, I’d fuck you.”

***

When we arrived at the pool hall a little after 8:30, everyone else was already there. They occupied a few tables near the back corner, and by Steph and Danielle’s poor rendition of
You and Tequila
by Kenny Chesney, it looked like they were already a few pitchers of beer deep.
I really need to work on my time management skills.

Since Shane didn’t know either of the other two girls or Steph’s boyfriend Dan, he had probably spent most of his time there as a third wheel to Kate and Kyle, who were already all over each other.
Clearly, Kate didn’t share my same need for Rule Number 3. Shane’s face lit up when he saw me. And though I tried my hardest to conceal it, I was sure my expression mirrored his.

“It’s about time you showed up, Bishop.
I was worried you might’ve chickened out.”

“Ha!” I laughed loudly.
“You
should
be worried. But not about me chickening out. About me kicking your ass and emasculating you in front of all these gorgeous women.” I gestured my arms toward Kate, Lily, Danielle, and Steph.

“Okay then,” Shane said as he handed me a beer.
“Let’s get to it. Best of three. And I highly doubt I’ll be emasculated.”

I actually highly doubted that too.
Shane’s pecs strained against his snug, dark gray V-neck T-shirt. He stood, relaxed and confident, with one arm leaning against the worn wooden shelf that ran around the perimeter of the room and the other holding the cue parallel to his body. Before I could stop myself, I found my gaze wandering from the bottoms of his perfectly fitted dark jeans all the way up to the tips of his golden hair, which I noticed was a little more tousled than usual. I paused briefly at the fly of his pants to imagine what might be underneath.
Yup, still not laughing
. I eventually forced my attention to his face and the rugged stubble that had grown since I’d seen him last. Even if I beat Shane in every game we played, nothing could take his manliness away from him. It was an intrinsic quality that manifested itself physically.

“I’m competitive,” I said, forcing myself from my indecent daydreams.
“What are the stakes?”

“Hmm,” Shane thought for a minute.
“Let’s make it interesting. If I win, you have to kiss me in public.”

I raised my eyebrows at him.

“Relax, Bishop, I don’t wanna be your boyfriend or anything. We’re not at a middle school dance. I just want the satisfaction of making you break one of your rules,” Shane said quietly so only I could hear.

“And if I win?” I looked back at Shane, intrigued.

“You get to kiss me in private,” he said matter-of-factly.

“Is that supposed to be a
reward
for me? I guess the only positive would be that I could deny it ever happened because there wouldn't be any witnesses.” I remained silent for a few moments pretending to consider his offer, but I knew I would agree to it the moment he’d suggested it. I was confident that there was no way I would have to break one of my rules, and the thought of kissing Shane in private was just too enticing to pass up. “Fine,” I said, feigning my disgust. I couldn’t help but notice Lily’s I-told-you-so grin. “Not a word,” I warned her.

Steph and Danielle were already too drunk to notice what was going on, so they continued rolling the balls into each other on the table next to ours while Dan tried to calm them down and get a real game going.

“You break. I’m not good at it.” I grabbed the triangle and placed it at one end of the table. “Does it matter which balls go where?” I asked as I placed them inside the triangle. The laughter of those around me was the only response I received, so I put the balls in randomly.

As I leaned over to pull the triangle up delicately, I heard, “Nice rack.”
I looked up to see Shane staring at me from the opposite end of the table. ‘What?” he said with a shrug. “I’ve always wanted to say that.” Then he leaned down, eyeing up his shot. With one smooth movement, he slid the cue between his fingers, and the balls scattered across the table. He sank one stripe and one solid on the break. Then he walked around the table carefully deliberating his possible shots before declaring that he would be playing stripes.

He made two of the next three shots, and then motioned that it was my turn.
I studied the table and moved toward the orange ball near the side pocket. The cue ball was nearly against it. I hit it in easily, but missed the next one when the tip of the stick slid up over the cue ball upon impact.

“Put some chalk on that,” Shane said, as he tossed it to me.
“You don’t want the tip to be too slick. You need a little friction.”

Did he know how dirty that sounded?
Had he said it intentionally to get a reaction out of me, or was it just that my mind was in the gutter? Again. Shane shot me a devilish grin.
Yup, definitely intentional.

Kyle, Kate, and Lily were clearly entertained by our exchange.
The three of them laughed at Shane’s comment and cheered him on when he sank three consecutive shots. “Lily, you’re supposed to be rooting for
me
. What the hell?” I asked, only half joking.

“I kinda wanna see you kiss him,” she explained.
“Although
hearing
all about it later might be even better now that I’m thinking about it.”

I ignored her comment as Shane missed his next shot, and I lined up for my own.

“Can I show you something?”
Shane stood off to the side, slightly behind me.

“Sure,” I said curiously.

He leaned down and pulled the stick back, running it against the skin between his thumb and index finger. “Lighten your grip a little with your right hand, and don’t curl your left fingers around the stick. See? Watch me.”

So I did.
I studied him shamelessly as he pulled on the stick steadily, smoothly with his right hand. I backed away to examine his firm ass as he leaned over the table confidently. I had the urge to reach around him and feel his hard chest and stomach. I felt the same tightening in my lower core that I’d felt so many times with this man recently. Was I seriously getting turned on watching Shane play pool? I briefly hoped I would lose the first two games just so I could kiss him right here.

But my competitive nature got the better of me.
I humored Shane by using his technique for my next shot and high-fived Lily when the purple ball fell into the corner pocket with little effort. But my next shot was off-center, and I scratched.

Shane placed the cue ball close to the last striped one and tapped it in with the perfect amount of force.
“Eight ball, corner pocket,” he said, gesturing to the pocket closest to me.” He leaned down and kept his eyes on me as he pulled the stick back for his last shot. The cue ball collided with the eight and stopped in place on impact, allowing the eight ball to drop into the corner pocket. “You didn’t expect me to go easy on you, did you?” Shane asked.

“Oh, I think I know you better than
that
. Besides, I like a challenge.”

Shane’s mouth raised into a subtle grin.
“So do I.”

Huh?
He won the game easily. What the hell is he talking about?

***

The next game was much more even. Shane made a few shots, then I sank a few. Kate and Kyle decided to play Dan and Steph on the table next to us. And Danielle settled herself onto a stool and occupied herself with alcohol. I guess Shane and I were not as entertaining as we’d been the first round.

Even Lily seemed bored.
I looked over a few times to see her face buried in her phone as she anxiously checked the time. I was sure she’d been texting the new hottie. “I’m gonna get going,” she said after a few more minutes.

“But you’re my ride home,” I said.
“Eight ball, side pocket. It’s out of the way for Dan, and he's already driving Danielle." I wasn't about to ruin Kyle's time with Kate by asking him to drive me. "I thought you weren’t going out until we were done?” Allowing my instincts to take over, I lined my shot up and made it easily.

Before Lily could open her mouth to reply, Shane responded.
“I’ll drive you. It’s no big deal.”

I couldn’t argue.
I didn’t have any other way home. Plus, I had to admit that I was secretly happy to get another ride home with Shane. And something told me I wasn’t the only one trying to hide my excitement.

“Perfect,” Lily said as she grabbed her bag off the chair and turned to leave.

“It’s all tied up,” I said as I placed the balls in the triangle.

“Not for long.
I took it easy on you the last game," Shane said with a smile.

I looked over Shane’s shoulder and watched my traitorous sex fiend of a friend head toward the exit.
That’s when I saw him.
Shit, shit, shit.
I put my head down hoping he didn’t see me. But as I heard him call my name, I knew I was too late. I had no choice but to look up. “Zach?” I don’t know why I said it like it was a question. If either of us should have been surprised to see the other, it shouldn’t have been me. After all, it wasn’t
Zach
who had said he’d moved to another country.

“I can’t believe you’re here
.” Zach moved closer so he could hug me, oblivious to Shane standing a few feet behind him. "I figured you’d call when you came back to visit.” He was genuinely happy to see me, though I had no idea why. I could really be a bitch sometimes. “Wait, are you still living in Holland, or are you back for good?”

Kyle just shook his head and smiled.
At this point, nothing I did surprised him. And he knew better than to say anything. But
Shane's
face was priceless. He tilted his head to the side and raised one eyebrow before mouthing “Holland?”

“Uh . . . yeah.
I just got back, actually.”
Jesus, why am I speaking in a Dutch accent? Is this even a
Dutch
accent? I sound like Borat.
“I didn’t really like it.”

“Wow, you weren’t even there that long, and you already picked up an accent.
Did you have to learn . . . wait, what do they even speak there?”