Shadows Book 1 in the World of Shadows (8 page)

“
You’re wrong,” I whispered
softly.

Axon turned my face again and stared at me
as though he had so many things to say, but didn’t know how to say
them. Then, without warning, he bent and kissed me softly on the
lips. I froze at his touch, my muscles screaming for me to fight
while my soul whispered for me to fly. But I didn’t have wings and
my body wouldn’t listen to me anymore. I merely felt, for one
second, like there was someone else in the world who cared whether
I lived or died. And for that one brief moment, I realized what it
felt like to be truly alive.

Axon backed up with wide eyes and an apology
on his lips, but before he could say it, his knees gave out and he
would have hit the white fur carpet if I hadn’t caught his arm and
braced him against me.

“
The sun,” he said quietly
as though the words took the rest of the strength he
had.

I nodded, glancing out the window at the
shadows that blanketed the city. “You should be sleeping.”

He allowed me to help him to his room across
the great hall from my own. I helped him lay gently onto the bed,
then pulled off his boots and set them in a corner by the door.
“You know better than to be up and about when the sun’s down.
You’re lucky I’m not some crazy Duskie who’d be better off without
more Luminos in her life.” I laughed at my words and a hint of
amusement touched his eyes at my scolding. I turned away, but
paused at the door. “Goodnight, Prince Axon.”

“
No.” I looked back at his
tone. Axon shook his head, his eyelids heavy and words soft. “Never
prince to you. Just Axon. Promise me, Nexa.”

I didn’t want to promise him anything, but I
could tell he wouldn’t sleep unless I agreed. “I promise,” I said
softly.

“
Promise what?” he pressed
in his persistent, princely way.

I bit back a smile. “Promise to never call
you prince, Axon.”

He nodded and closed his eyes. I shut the
door with prohibited thoughts in my head and allowed myself to feel
them for the brief walk from the great hall to my room before I
shut the door and returned to the confusion that had become my real
life.

Chapter 9

“
Nexa?”

I awoke to the sound of my name and the door
to my room brushing open. I sat up dazed and disoriented, then
picked up the soft blanket that smelled of birds and the sky and
scrambled toward the bed, but the square of light from the door
caught me on my way. I stopped and smiled sheepishly.

“
Sleeping on the floor?”
Jatha asked with a raised eyebrow.

I nodded. “The bed’s too soft.”

“
The couches are nice,”
Staden pointed out.

“
He just knows that because
he couldn’t sleep on the bed either,” Jatha said, nudging Staden
with his elbow.

Staden grinned and shrugged. “Too many days
on the road, I guess.”

I smiled, liking them even more.

“
You know, there are robes
and sleeping gowns in the dressers if you want to sleep more
comfortably,” Jatha pointed out.

I peered at the giant closet along the far
wall. “It’d feel weird to wear someone else’s clothes.”

Jatha gestured for me to sit on the chair by
the mirror. I obeyed, but avoided looking at my reflection.
“They’re not anyone else’s clothes. They were made for our party,
we just arrived later than expected.” He frowned in thought.
“Though I don’t know if they expected any women in the party.
That’s kind of the point of our journey.”

Staden made me turn so that he could lift up
my shirt to look at my back. “We should have checked this yesterday
before you went to bed. I hold myself responsible if it’s
infected.”

I shook my head. “Everyone was exhausted.
It’ll be fine.” Jatha gently unwrapped my right hand. I watched his
steady fingers work. “What do you mean that’s the point of the
journey?”

Staden glanced at Jatha over my shoulder,
but I couldn’t read the look they exchanged. He pursed his lips.
“Prince Axon is here to meet Princess Tiseria and see if a suitable
arrangement can be made.”

I frowned. “An arrangement?”

Staden gently removed the bandages on my
neck. “For possible marriage. A betrothal between Lysus and Lumini
would be beneficial to both empires.” He said it in a
matter-of-fact tone as though it was as easy as trading meat for
grain.

I tried to see it impartially as well, but I
couldn’t explain why the thought caused my heart to tighten so that
each beat hurt a little. I shouldn’t care what Axon did with his
life. Duskies at Firen Caves never married. I had known all my life
I would never fall in love, marry, or have children. So why was it
harder to breathe all of the sudden?

I pushed past my emotions. “How would it be
beneficial?”

Jatha wadded up the bandages from my hand.
“This is healed enough for fresh air.” He shoved the bandages in
his pocket and his brow creased. “Well, being on opposite sides of
the Madric Ocean means it will open the channels for trade. Both
empires have different resources as far as crops, animals, fabrics,
and other goods are concerned. It will be an economic boost for
both. It will also heal any rifts left from the last war.”

“
The last war?” I had heard
quiet whisperings of the war at Firen Caves, but they spoke of
lands so far away it was almost like listening to a
story.

Jatha nodded. “It was actually a
continuation of the previous war, the one in which the Sathen were
freed; but they’re considered separate because the first war was
under Prince Axon’s grandfather’s rule, and this one is under his
father’s.”

“
Let’s just hope the trend
doesn’t continue,” Staden said as though repeating something he had
said many times before. He put new, thinner bandages on my neck and
wrapped it up again, then made me turn so he could reach my back
while Jatha checked on my side. “You really should change this
shirt. If anything, it’ll be the cause of infection.”

I touched the hem, suddenly partial to the
coarse fabric in a way I had never been at the Caves; but it was
tattered and worn, barely even resembling a shirt after all it had
been through. I felt like the shirt.

I winced when one of the bandages pulled on
the deep claw marks.

“
Sorry,” Staden said
quietly. He worked more gently, freeing the final bandages with
care. “What do you think, Jatha?”

Jatha stood from putting new bandages on my
side and walked around to join him. They both stood silent for so
long I began to feel uncomfortable.

I was about to ask them what they were
staring at when Jatha spoke, his words soft as though tightly
controlled. “How could anyone do this to another person?”

I glanced back at him. “I’m a Duskie,
remember? Not a person.”

But when I met his light green eyes, I could
see he didn’t appreciate the joke. He studied my back as if an
answer to a pressing question was written in the lash scars. I
turned away and clenched my hands.

Jatha touched my shoulder. “I’m sorry, Nexa.
I just forgot how bad it was.” His words were so apologetic I
instantly forgave him. “I just don’t get it, that’s all.”

Staden sighed and began cleaning the wounds
with ointment he had brought with him. “We’re doctors, remember? We
heal, not harm. Don’t lower yourself to the mind of someone who
could take out their frustrations on another person’s back.”

I let out a grim laugh. “I earned the
lashes.”

Staden and Jatha both fell silent and I
wondered what look they shared behind my back. I waited in silence
for them to finish the bandaging, and heard the door to one of the
dressers open.

“
All done,” Staden
said.

I lowered what was left of my shirt and
turned around. “Thank you both. You’ve done so-“

Jatha stood in front of me with a dark blue
dress edged with black lace in his hands. “You should take
advantage of the clothes here.”

I shook my head. I couldn’t even picture
myself in clothing so fine, let alone a dress, which was something
I had never even worn before. “I can’t.”

Jatha frowned in thought and surveyed me
with a frank gaze I found unnerving. He then turned back to the
closet. When he returned this time, he held a pair of simple light
brown pants and a white shirt with ruffles at the front and on the
sleeves. “Is this a little better?”

I was about to protest again that I couldn’t
wear the clothes, but the thought of the soft fabric against the
many wounds along my body made me hesitate. My clothes also carried
a certain odor from the trek that didn’t belong in the castle.
“You’re wearing clothes from the closets in your rooms?” I
asked.

Staden and Jatha exchanged looks of triumph
and I realized they must have been trying to be polite about my
attire. “We changed the second we reached our rooms yesterday,”
Staden said. “It’s nice to wear something clean after a long
journey.”

Jatha waved the clothes at me. “If you don’t
wear them, they’ll just go to waste.”

I doubted it, but allowed myself to be
persuaded. Jatha grinned and handed me the clothes on his way
out.

Staden paused by the door. “There’s scented
water in the bowl by your mirror. It wouldn’t hurt to scrub a
little.”

I blushed, but thanked him. When they shut
the door, I sat on the bed and stared at the clothes in my hands.
The white shirt was made of a soft fabric I had never felt before.
It was silky but breathed well, a shirt perfect for the hot desert
sun. The pants were of animal skin, but worked so soft that my
fingers made little whorls on the hide. I held them to my nose and
could detect a very faint rawhide smell, but it was hidden under
the soaps and creams used to tan the hide and probably undetectable
to the less sensitive Luminos nose.

I ignored the shoes entirely. I had never
worn shoes and didn't know how Axon and his men could bear to wear
such uncomfortable looking things everywhere they went.

I found some underclothes in a drawer on the
right of the dresser, and was grateful Jatha had refrained from
mentioning them to let me save some pride. I piled my old clothes
in a corner of the room, dismayed at how dirty they were compared
to the beautiful white rug and cream upholstery around me. I went
to the bowl by the mirror and used the rag to wash myself.

When I smelled thoroughly of the unknown
flowers in the bowl and nothing of the hot desert sand and baking
sun, I slipped into the soft underclothes, relishing the way they
felt against my damaged skin. I stepped into the pants and fastened
them using the braided belt of the same hide that they came with,
then pulled on the white shirt. The fabric rested softly on my
shoulders as though I wore a breeze that soothed my skin instead of
scratching against it like my shirt from the Caves. I sighed and
turned to the mirror.

The features of the Duskie girl that stared
back at me had softened somewhat as though a night without fearing
for her life had taken away a few rough years. I touched my face to
convince myself she was really me. I had never been so clean, nor
worn such fine clothing. I didn't feel like myself.

A knock sounded at the door and I turned.
When the door didn’t open and the knock sounded again, I hurried to
open it.

Axon stood dressed in a regal gold doublet
edged in black, with matching black pants and a gold cape that hung
from his shoulders. His shoulder-length light hair was washed and
combed back, and he smelled of the outdoors in a way that said the
scent was bottled instead of obtained by true wandering. He looked
me up and down as though he couldn’t help himself and his eyes
widened. “Hello, Nexa?”

I smiled at the question in his voice and
couldn’t help the color that rose to my cheeks. “Good morning,
Axon. How did you sleep?” I applauded myself for regurgitating the
niceties I had heard the upper class at the Caves speak, though it
always seemed strange to me that the quality of someone’s sleep was
a topic of conversation.

A soft smile touched Axon's lips. “Very
well; I didn’t have to worry about waking up to an attack.”

I laughed. “That’s how I felt.”

His shoulders relaxed and he nodded at the
room. “Feeling a little more comfortable here?”

I looked behind me at the waded up blanket
on the rug and the untidy pile of clothes in the corner and felt
suddenly guilty. “I should clean it up. I’m sorry, I-“

Axon caught my arm before I could turn away.
“I’m glad that you’re comfortable,” he said pointedly. “You’re a
guest here and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want
to.”

I shrugged out of his grasp. “It’s not even
my room. I shouldn’t be so cavalier about it. It’s just that Jatha
and Staden came early to check on how I was healing and Jatha
picked out some clothes for me to wear.” I stopped at the look on
Axon’s face. Red touched my cheeks again and I couldn’t explain why
I had blushed more in the last hundred heartbeats than I had my
entire life. “What?”

A smile started at his eyes and echoed on
his lips. “I’m just trying to picture Jatha picking out
clothes.”

A laugh escaped me. “He wanted me to wear a
dress.”

“
That I really would have
liked to see.” He lowered his eyes before I could tell if he was
joking or not, and the emotions of the night before along with the
memory of the kiss made my heart flutter. I could still taste his
lips, soft and fleeting.

Axon cleared his throat and met my eyes
again, speaking rapidly. “I just came to say that I’ll be at a
council all day and you will probably be more comfortable here
instead of chained to a seat like me.”

I stared at him and he laughed.
“Metaphorically speaking, of course.” He sighed and brushed the
hair out of his eyes in the first self-conscious gesture I had seen
him make. “Please relax here and recuperate from our journey. You
deserve the rest.”