Shadows of the Emerald City (20 page)

Detrita’s head shook and she moaned. Archetta came over and took my arm. She winked at me and whispered in my ear.

“
Must need a little relaxing after that long ride.” Archetta said. She moved in closer and whispered in my ear. “’Sides, honey. I think Detrita needs a little alone time with her man, you dig?”

“
I dig.” I said.

“
Take me in, Captain Flyboy. Buy me a drink?”

“
Make you a deal,” I said. I held open the door. “I give you something, you give me something.”

“
That’s the plan.”

“
I’m giving you the wrong impression. What I need is information.”

“
You Flyboys are all business, aren’t you?”

“
Not at all.” I said and slipped my hand under the black leather straps and belts covering her round green ass. I cupped the fleshy area between her legs, a little taken back by the coolness of it. I wiggled a finger up into her and pulled her closer to me. Her hands were up behind my neck and our lips fell against each other.

“
We going in for a room or ain’t we?”

“
What’s wrong with right here? Detrita is enjoying it.”

“
I ain’t an exhibitionist like Detrita is. Come on.”

“
All right.” We went inside
Dorothy’s
.

It was pretty much how I imagined it would be. Dark. Smoky. Blue and white and ruby and green lights cut through the haze, pulsed to the disharmony of the pipe music. A Green-Skin in a Dorothy costume clutched a crystal pole and raised her self up on it, her legs extended and spread apart, revealing a tangle of black hair between them. She swung out over the heads of some Half-as-Tallers and a couple of sailors. As she passed by, a puff of green-gray juice sprayed out at the men. At first they grimaced, then laughed, then seemed to settle into some weird sexual funk.

“
Can you do that?” I asked Archetta.

She laughed, nowhere near a cackle.

“
Takes some practice. But we can certainly give it a try.” Archetta slid her hand along the outside of my coat. Her fingers tried to undo the buttons. I took her wrist and pressed her hand against my erection.

“
You want in somewhere,” I said. “Get in here.”

Archetta licked my lips and smiled at me, her dark eyes sliding almost closed.

“
We ain’t talked price yet.”

“
I think I’ve got something you can use,” I said. I reached into my pocket and pulled out a small pink ball. I held my palm open. Archetta put her finger on it and rolled it along my skin. Little shocks poked at my palm as she did it.

“
What is it?” She asked.

“
It’s called a
Pearl of Protection
. Protects you from danger. Loaded with ten charges. When the tenth one is used, the pearl crumbles into dust.”

“
What I gotta do for that?”

“
Just tell me something.”

“
I’d rather blow you, Flyboy.”

I laughed. “You might get to yet.”

“
Whatcha wanta know?”

“
Did the Impertinent Imp come in here tonight?”

“
Imp?” Archetta lifted the pearl between her long green finger and her narrow thumb. She rolled it between the two. “It tingles.”

I took the pearl back.

“
The
Imp
,” I said again. Archetta looked at me, but clutched the pearl. “Short guy. Ugly, narrow eyes a kind of piss yellow. Razor sharp teeth. Big nose like a tulip bulb. Dirty fingers he can pop claws out of.” Archetta gave me a blank look. “Oh. And he has wings on his back like a dragon fly’s.”

“
Oh.
Him?
He’s the guy outside with Detrita.”

I stuck my fist into my jacket pocket and dropped the pearl inside it. I went back outside the club, stepping into a puddle that hadn’t been there when we went in. Detrita’s body was face-first against the black bricks of
Dorothy’s
, the apparent source of the oily green-black blood covering my boots.

The Imp hadn’t been feisty; it had been hungry, and it ate Detrita from the outside in.

The wails and cries of the Imp made my skin ripple with gooseflesh. A heavy wet thud struck the black bricks behind my head. Sliding down along them was the green mush that had once been Detrita’s heart. I looked up and saw it, silhouetted against the near full moon. The Imp hovered, its wings buzzing, while it chewed on some other internals taken from Detrita.

I shook out the carpet and jumped on it, taking off after the Imp. The little demon thought it was a joke. Its laugh a death rattle and it trailed over the night sky above the Oogaboo. The Imp flew higher, its double set of insect wings humming and buzzing and helping it to dart in sharp angles.

“
Imp!
’ I yelled. “
Hold up!
” I knelt on the carpet, clutched my two favorite corners and held the front half of the rug up in front of me. This maneuver severely shrank the area beneath me. I clutched it tighter and rose higher. The carpet knew my every thought; it knew I wanted to overtake the Imp so it pushed itself further and faster, to the point where I could hear the unsettling rip of the fabric. “
Imp! I command you to halt!
”

“
Not on that dead tramp’s life.” The Imp darted past me on his way back down, winked a narrow yellow eye at me. I could see the gristle between its fangs. “You want to turn me into that lead button again!”

The carpet dipped to follow.

“
No!
” I yelled. “I just want to ask you some questions.” The carpet tipped sideways, wrapped around my ankles to keep me on. It followed the Imp through a series of the narrow alleys. I ducked my head before it got bashed and scraped along a wall.

“
Rotten apples!” The Imp cursed. “I don’t want to go back!” The Imp’s voice trailed as it once again shot forward.

The carpet kept with it
.

“
You won’t!
”

“
Not even for killing the Green Skin tramp?”

“
That’s up to the Oogaboo,
” I yelled into the wind. “
It’s their jurisdiction.
”

“
Yippie!” The Imp yelled, spiraling into a barrel roll. The Imp knew as well as I did that the only thing that brought out one of the two Oogaboo police guards was money or booze. “It feels so good to be free!”

“
I’ll bet.” I pulled up next to the Imp. It sat cross-legged in the night sky, its wings humming to keep it in place. I looked below. The moon felt too large from this spot, the people too small below me. I kept my eyes on the Imp.

“
You have no idea,” the Imp said. It smiled at the moon, then wiped the rest of Detrita’s blood off its chin with the back of its stubby hand.

“
So you apologized to Queen Ozma?”

The Imp looked at me with mirthful eyes.

“
Not.”

“
Then how did you get released?”

“
How do you think, Captain Jo Guard?” He leaned in towards me. “Only two people have the power to release me. One of them sucked your shaft. Oh, don’t act so surprised. All of Oz knows you were poking her with your mighty emerald dick.”

“
All right, all right,” The Imp could be so crass. “So who is the other one besides the Queen?”

“
Good
is a relative term,” the Imp said.

I hated when the Imp spoke in riddles
almost
as much as when it was crass.

“
Imp,” I pleaded. “I don’t have time for this. Someone or something is killing the Half-as-Talls and it’s driving them out of Munchkinland.”

“
Oh that. I know about that. I’m one of them.”

“
You’re eating Half-as-Talls?”

“
They’re not so bad with a little green salt.” The Imp let loose with its death-rattling giggle.

“
You said you’re one of them? There’s more?”

“
Plenty more.” The Imp opened its narrow eyes and smiled revealing its cracked and crooked teeth, its fangs, and its bifurcated tongue.

“
Why eat the Half-as-Talls? There’s food all over Oz.”

“
You want answers, Jo Guard?’

“
I wouldn’t be hovering over the fucking Oogaboo if I didn’t.”

“
Then follow the Yellow Brick Road.” The Imp straightened itself out, getting ready to fly away home. It opened its mouth to say something when we both noticed the wisps of smoke floating out. An orange circle began to glow in the center of its grey chest. The Imp clawed at the spot with his stubby fingers. It began to tremble.

“
No! No!
You just let me out! I didn’t tell him anything! I didn’t speak about you!”

The carpet pulled me backwards, wrapping itself around me in an attempt to keep me away from the impending explosion. I could still feel the shock and heat as the Imp disintegrated behind me. The concussion sent the carpet twirling. Unable to unfurl, it plummeted with me wrapped inside it. I kicked and pushed at the fabric, squirming to open it up before smashing to a pulp below. I had no idea of how close I was to that very event.

Smoldering fabric filled my nose. In addition to smashing on the streets of the Oogaboo I now had to worry about burning away like the black tree bark inside Detrita’s smoker. I started rocking side to side until I felt the carpet unroll. That got it open and I crawled around slapping at the flames. The rug spun in flat circles, dropping faster and faster.

I tried to keep the panic out of my thoughts so the carpet could read my peace and straighten itself. The flames were engulfing it. I was dropping down along side of buildings and watching the pavement rising at me when I felt a heavy tug on my back. I was lifted into the air as the carpet flamed out, becoming little tendrils of red-hot glowing threads flittering to the ground.

It took me a few seconds to realize I was dangling beneath the hairy toes of the flying monkey I’d seen earlier. My nose actually cued me in before I looked up; flying monkeys weren’t known for their hygiene. When I did, I found the monkey reaching down with a paw to hoist me up into a more secure position. I crawled around and got on its back, folding my arms around his neck. I had no idea where the monkey was taking me and it wouldn’t have done any good to ask it.

Monkeys don’t talk. They fly.

He carried me far away from the Oogaboo. I was thankful for that but would be even more thankful when my feet touched solid ground. He banked in a long, effortless glide. Ahead of us was a dark valley. Atop a precipice I could pick out two flickering pinpoints of firelight. The monkey took us in that direction and soon was landing along the cliff. At the end of the ride I clapped him on the back, showing him my approval and my respect for his gallantry. The monkey turned and hooted his appreciation. He turned and ran at the edge of the cliff and floated off into the night.

For a while I thought I was alone. It didn’t take me long to realize I wasn’t. Even though I couldn’t see anyone, I had the impression there was somebody else there.

The high-pitched nasal drone of the invisible voice told me it was Mayor Gerrld of Munchkinland City.

“
She sent you, I see.”

I turned in the direction of the voice and looked at a shadow under the left hand torch. Slowly the Half-as-Tall mayor’s head appeared. It was followed by his hand.

“
So
that’s
where the Teleporting Cloak of Invisibility went,” I said. “Hiding out, Mr. Mayor?”

“
For the moment. It won’t be long before she finds me.”

“
Who?” I asked.

“
Your whore of a queen.” He said. There was a tone of anger I didn’t know Half-as-Talls possessed.

“
She sent me to find you.”

“
Of course she did. She wants you to bring me back so she can kill me.”

“
Why would she do that? She thought the Imp was going to get you.”

The Mayor looked around at the shadows. He pulled his hands back into the cloak.

“
The Imp? What would the Imp want with me?”

“
He said he was part of an army sent to kill Half-as-excuse me. Munchkins,”

The Mayor shook his head. “Glinda let the Imp loose to go after Ozma, not me.”

“
Yeah, well, that isn’t going to happen now.”

“
Why is that, Jo Guard?”

“
The Imp is dead. Vaporized. Besides, Glinda knew the Imp could only kill Ozma once the charm she placed around her is broken. Why would she release the Imp if she’s protecting her? Doesn’t make sense.”

“
It does if you understand the royal lineage.”

“
Maybe you should map it out for me.”

The Mayor pulled the hood up over his head and disappeared. The wind made the torches dance. I looked around at shadows. When the Mayor spoke again, he was behind me.

“
Sorry. I had to jump away and jump back. Glinda has spies. She knows where I am.”

“
How?”

“
Crystal ball. She’s been watching you. Certain. She probably vaporized the Imp.”

I looked around. Glinda could have seen the Imp with me. And now the Mayor? And if so, why hadn’t she zapped him like she had the Imp? I asked the Mayor.