Shelley the Lifeboat Labrador (14 page)

On the subject of jazz they referred to the time Bud stayed for a couple of days and showing me a photo album full of images of that great event.  Their love of cars and jazz could be seen by the images on the wall and huge jazz collection of LPs that graced the living room which joined the bar.   We were to get to know each other well and over the next few years I spent many a happy hour listening to jazz and consuming vast quantities of wine. Being a B and B also had its advantages on the odd occasion. They loved dogs and had about 6 themselves.

Beside the Inn was a weir which joined a river where boats could be hired to go up to the falls about two miles away.  Whilst we were in the bar having a drink I could see Shelley wanted a walk so leaving Gordon and Maggie I took her out.  What a mistake it was going to be!                                            

Just before the start of the river was a small bridge which crossed into fields where there were lots of cattle to the other side of the actual weir which was surrounded by high grass banks.  Before I knew it Shelley had reached the edge by one of the grass banks and with a massive aerial leap tried to jump it to get to the cattle – she had not seen the small bridge to the side of her.

There was a terrific splash and Shelley was in the water swimming around but getting nearer to the actual weir gates.  There was no real danger as she would not have been swept through them. However; the real problem would be trying to get her out of the water due to the high banks and muddy grass covered sides.  I ran along the bank calling her to follow me which she did but the stagnant water was very murky and contained lots of water lilies and other debris.  It was becoming an effort for her and I could see that she was getting tired due to having problems swimming.  I called out to the area where the boats were moored and one of the students who helped there came along with a long boat hook and some rope.   I got down to the bank whilst at the same time getting covered in mud and cow dung and managed to throw the rope out towards Shelley whilst holding onto the long boat hook.  It seemed a long time but I did manage to get to her grabbing her collar where I put the rope though.  Both of us pulled her slowly in making sure the collar was safe and holding the rope.  At the foot of the bank I pushed her up and then grabbed hold of the boat hook to get myself back to solid ground.

It was a hose down for both of us.  Luckily I carried clothes in my car boot (a lesson learnt from lifeboat duties). The weather was warm so it did not take her too long to dry out giving me the opportunity to have a few more pints.

Being a glutton for punishment we returned several times to the Anchor.  Having not learnt my lesson I decided to take her up the river to the waterfall. We put Shelley in the boat and thought that would be fine. However; the dreaded cows appeared again and before we knew it she had jumped over the side nearly taking us both with her swimming in their direction.  This time the water was clear and the banks not so steep – she managed to get to the cattle but after a while got bored trying to impress them as much as they did with her. Shelley was never an animal worrier just an attention seeker. It reminded of that wonderful scene in Ken Russels film ‘Women in Love’ when Glenda Jackson danced in front of some cows by a river bank. I digress!

We were in a ‘Catch 22’ do we carry on without her knowing that we could loose her up river due to the woods (which I was not keen on) or try and get her back into the boat by going to the bank, which again I was not keen on knowing that the temptation for a swim would no doubt take over again!  The third option was for me to row to the bank and walk her back about half a mile to the moorings and ask one of the students to look after her.

Once done we carried on up to the falls – which were not that spectacular and then returned back the two miles to the Anchor.  Memories were to last for several days due to being bitten from head to toe by the many insects attracted to the cow pats that were in abundance along the river either side.  From then on every visit to the Anchor was limited to the bar or garden with Shelley under control much to her disapproval!

I always kept Shelley away from gardens that had ponds as experience had proven that she had a good track record of self destruct mode when near them.  The first time I called to see Brenda at her house in Hove she offered me a drink and suggested Shelley went into the back garden.  I totally forgot to ask about there being a pond.  We both soon found out when she appeared covered once again in mud leaving a trail of water lilies and sundry across Brenda’s pristine lawn.  Needless to say we were not the flavour of the month nor would we be with her gardener who was due to call the next day.  I tried to clear it up as best I could whilst putting the odd Goldfish back into the pond at the same time without Brenda noticing. Sadly a couple floated to the surface very quickly along with one poor frog that got in the way.  

The other problem with water was that Shelley had no consideration for any one’s property in the process.  Not that she was a disobedient dog.  To her water and mud was a part of everyday life and if it was there or to be found; why not make the most of it.

A walk along the beach always meant a swim come high or low tide or summer or winter. I had got used to taking a towel in the car and a bottle of water to wash her down, but this did not overcome the problem of the back car seat.  It caused me many problems with my employers over the years.  I tried everything from plastic seat covers to old lifeboat jackets. A battery hairdryer which plugged into the car was money not well spent being a total disaster.  The car cleaning bill became a regular monthly item that I had to live with.  Staying in hotels could sometimes cause a few problems.  I often overcame this by using a back door to the hotel through the car park, or smuggling her in a little later when not so many staff were around.

Having a bath was also fun but after a while I found that locking her out of the bathroom was the best option.  In her early days she came into the bathroom and persisted in putting her head over the baths side into the water. As she got bigger the second option was to try to get into the bath with me which for a male could have been very dangerous.  Hotels with showers also attracted her interest so they like the bath were on her no go list.

Most hotels accepted dogs!  I recall at one exhibition I was attending at Harrogate (I did several exhibitions a year) that the company I worked for had invited some special customers to a dinner with a guest speaker.  In those days in the medical sales world a lot of money was spent on looking after their customers.                                                                                             

The guest speaker was ‘Blaster Bates’ who had a wonderful reputation for blowing up chimneys and drinking a lot of Yorkshire ale whilst being very entertaining as an after dinner speaker.  He arrived having been driven by his daughter and joined us for pre dinner drinks. This was followed by dinner and lots of wine.  He then commenced his talk having asked one of the waiters to keep his beer jug topped up which seemed to happen almost every five minutes.

I have never laughed so much in many a year and for well over an hour he kept everyone enthralled with his adventures and stories. To conclude the evening he asked for one more jug of beer and then produced from his pocket

a stick of Gelignite and lit the fuse wire dropping it into the jug.

There was dead silence as the fuse burnt down with all of us thinking about our obituaries and how they would read in the following day’s papers.  Suddenly he picked up the stick and with his fingers stopped it burning about half an inch before the fuse went into the brown roll of gunpowder.  “Ah!” He said as he threw it into a nearby fireplace adding, “A few weeks ago I did this same trick and threw it into the fireplace at a hotel up yonder and dam fuse had not gone out properly. You should have seen all the guests covered from head to toe in soot. The hotel was delighted as it didn’t’ have to get it’s chimney cleaned for years but their dry cleaning bill was a little high,” he said with a loud laugh.

In talking to him later that evening – he stayed over as our guest I mentioned I had my Labrador with me and he asked me to go and get her.  He loved dogs and had many a tale to tell about his relationships with them. Shelley came down and he made such a fuss of her. Several of us stayed up late listening to his stories and enjoying an evening that remains etched on my mind to this day.

Blaster then asked if he could take Shelley for a little walk in the grounds of the hotel before retiring to bed. I had no objections as I still had a drink to finish.  About ten minutes later in walked Blaster with a soaked Shelley who had a stick of Gelignite in her mouth, “Look what dog has found,” he said in his Yorkshire accent as we all roared with laughter adding, ”No one told me about her love of water and before I knew it she was in the hotel swimming pool.”                                                                                    

I saw him the next morning when his daughter collected him and he asked me if I had a picture of Shelley – I hadn’t but agreed to send him one.  A Couple of weeks later it was returned signed ‘To My Wet Pal Shelley a Truly Wonderful Dog – Your Pal - Blaster Bates’ – I still have it.  Perhaps Shelley did have endearing powers when it came to other people – it made me feel very proud of her!

One evening I stayed in Great Yarmouth and went to the television room at the hotel. Shelley nestled down between my seat and another where a rather tall gentleman sat drinking a large scotch. He was watching a play on BBC and kept talking to himself saying rubbish - not good enough - could have done better. From time to time he patted Shelley which she loved. Once the play was over he turned to me and said “Well what did you think?” To my surprise it was the actor John Le Mesurier and he had been watching a drama which he had starred it. It was an odd feeling to be sitting with an actor looking at himself on TV at the same time.

Our discussion developed and we realised we had connections with Broadstairs where he lived with Hattie Jacques and Thetford where they filmed Dad’s Army and I had met many of the cast before at The Bell Hotel where I often stayed.

A move to the bar was called for with Shelley in tow and we spent an enjoyable couple of hours chatting giving Shelley several opportunities to show John her crisp opening trick.  What a nice man!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

End of Chapter Nineteen

AN EARLY MORNING WAKE UP CALL – CHAPTER 20

The Shoreham Harbour coastguard station was situated on Shoreham Beach.

It was a tall tower to the west of the harbour entrance with the lookout on top where both Brighton towards the east and Selsey to the west could be clearly seen.

Changes had been forecast for a long time and it was announced that the station was to close and all would then be based at Lee-on-Solent.  At the time there was a large outcry from fishermen and many local residents.  The Coastguards at the lookout had been responsible for saving a signif
icant number of lives and it also gave those on duty a good viewing point for the beaches, hidden from view, beside the entrance to the harbour where there had been several incidents over the years.

The crews got on well with the coastguards often meeting socially. When it was announced that the lookout would be closing it was agreed we would give the residents of Shoreham a send off to remember.  There was one coastguard called Mac who had a wonderful border collie taking it everywhere with him.  Both Shelley and his dog became good palls even to the extent of sharing the odd bag of crisps together.  Mac had served with the Royal Navy for many years and was very proud of being a sub mariner and kept us entertained many a time with his stories of life under water and his love of Pusers rum.

The day for the closure came and about 12 of us made our way in the dark over to the look out at about 5a.m.  When we got there we were greeted with hot tea and relevant alcoholic refreshments to go with it.  A lot of the crew liked rum (I have to say not my favourite tipple) and soon the tea was getting spliced with it.  I started on G and Ts at 5-30 as we waited for the dawn to appear over the back of Brighton.  The idea was to give Shoreham a dawn chorus it would remember.

Between us we had collected well over a dozen maroons which were all near their sell by date. It was about 6-15 when we went out on the balcony of the tower (Shelley and Macs dong included). In the distance the odd person was walking their dog on the beach and early morning workers were making their way to work.  The tide was high so some of the local fishing boats were on their way out of the harbour for another days fishing.

A phone call had been made to the local media and Mac had briefed the coastguard regional centre.  Each of us had a maroon and Mac fired the first one with us following behind every thirty seconds.  The sky lit up as the maroons went of. For those that don’t know the sound of a maroon the best way to describe it is that it is a ‘very loud bang indeed’ the object of the bang is to alert boats and people nearby that there is a problem at sea or the lifeboat is going to be launched.  This pyrotechnic display went on for about 10 minutes and one by one you could see the bedroom lights being turned on as residents came to their gardens to see what was happening.  Both dogs being used to the bangs sat there wondering what all the fuss was about.

There were some letters in the local papers over the next few days but in general the entertainment went down very well indeed with many regretting closure.  The tower is still there to this day and is manned by auxiliary coastguards after a lot of complaints were made to the governing powers that be.

We returned inside the lookout and carried on enjoying the early start to our festive day.  Later we all went to the Royal Sovereign where the landlord had prepared a hearty breakfast for us all including some nice tit bits for both dogs.  Needless to say the drinking session went on until late afternoon when we all retired wounded due to the epic over indulgence.

Mac and I often used to meet up walking our dogs on the beach and both dogs became very good pals swimming together and chasing each other along the sands at low tide.  I will always remember Mac coming into the pub one day without his dog – only to be told that he had died the day before – he was stricken with grief!                                                                        

There were some great characters on the lifeboat.  Peter Huxtable was to become coxswain later and still is as I write this book knowing the local coastal region very well.  He was also later to get an MBE for his work for the RNLI.  John (Ginger) Langdale worked for the Shoreham Port Authority and was a wonderful character with his beard and dry sense of humour.  I liked John a lot as he knew what he was doing and was always there to help. 

Geoff Tugwell was another who had joined as a young lad and stayed with the crew until he retired.  Geoff was an understanding person and was always interested in what people were doing with their lives outside the lifeboat.  Roger Grant had the most unusual laugh and loved his rum and coke.  He was a first class lifeboat man always willing to go on the deck in the worst weather conditions. He gave up with me when it came to knots though double checking every one I did, even getting me a book on the subject, which sadly still did not help.

Some crew members came and some went but the team during that period were fun and dedicated to the RNLI.  We always met up on Remembrance Day in Shoreham and joined the parade through the town in our RNLI Jumpers with Ginger carrying the RNLI Banner.  There was a church service first then the short service by the memorial watched by a lot of local residents.  Shelley always came and Bills wife Pearl had her on the lead for me.  She was always a good dog even when other people had her and just sat there taking the day in.  I put a poppy through her collar (as I did every year) and it always raised a smile from the many passers by as I walked her around.