Authors: Ruth Ann Nordin
where they had a good time as a family. Tomorrow, would
they go back to the way it usual y was in the house? Stiff,
awkward, depressing. The place he lived at now was such
a sharp contrast from where he grew up. While he was
growing up, no one locked bedroom doors, ate in silence,
or shot each other looks as if they were afraid of something
al the time. Fear. That was the prevailing mood in April and
Sep’s house, and that fear led to the depressing sensation
he couldn’t shake off.
So what April and Sep needed wasn’t him coming into their
house in a foul mood. Granted, he didn’t ask to be married,
but he was and the situation wasn’t going to get better if he
kept acting like the world had come to an end. Deciding it
was time to turn over a new leaf, he glanced at April, who
was holding a contented Nora, and Sep who sat beside
her. This was his family now, and he had a responsibility to
set the tone. And one place they’d have to tackle was the
locked bedroom. That room needed to be unlocked so
April and Sep could confront whatever aspect of the past
they desperately wanted to ignore. Once they confronted it,
they could deal with it and move on.
Joel didn’t see how they could have any joy in that house
until they took care of that bedroom. Soon. He’d approach
April about it soon. He needed to go to her about it first
because she was his wife and he had to settle matters with
her before he could talk to Sep about it. Steering the
horses to the front of the house, he cleared his throat.
April and Sep looked in his direction, so he took that as his
cue to speak. “I realize we didn’t get started off on the right
foot, but I think it’s time we changed al of that. I’m the head
of this family, and I’l do my part to make this work.” His
gaze went from April to Nora and then to Sep. “There’s
bound to be some adjustments. We al pretty much got
thrown together because of this Lou person. Sooner or later
the rat’s got to come out of his hole, and when he does, I’l
be ready for him. Until then, we don’t take any chances. No
one stays here alone.”
The relief on April’s face tugged at his heart. He knew
she’d been scared, but it didn’t register just how scared
she’d been until then, and judging by the worried
expression on Sep’s face, he shared in her fear. Yes, they
were afraid. And for al he knew, it was more than one thing
that worried them. Today wasn’t the day to ask them about
it. That could wait.
Today, they’d start building a foundation with the same
things his parents had when they married: trust, respect,
and ultimately love. He caught himself sighing and stopped.
Glancing at April, he caught the exasperated look on her
face, but this time when they made eye contact, there was a
hint of a smile on her lips.
Rol ing his eyes, he said, “Habits are hard to break, alright?
I’m afraid you’l have to deal with it.”
Tipping her head to the side, she said, “I suppose I don’t
mind it al that much as long as I know you’re not upset.”
“I can’t promise I’l never sigh when I’m upset.”
“Then if you’re not upset with me, Nora, or Sep, we should
be alright.”
“But when people live in the same house, they’re bound to
get on each other’s nerves. What if I sigh then?”
“Then I’l have to dump more cold water on you.”
At that, he laughed. She probably would, too. “You know,
you’re a real spitfire when you want to be.” And he had to
admit, he didn’t mind that so much. Setting the brake, he
said, “I’l put the sleigh and horses away.” He got down and
held his hands out to help April down so she could keep
Nora in her arms. “Sep, wil you take in the presents?”
Sep nodded and grabbed the stack of gifts.
As April and Sep went into the house, he hopped into the
sleigh. After he took care of the horses and sleigh, he went
into the house and noticed the smel of hot chocolate in the
kitchen. He hung up his coat and hat, put away his gloves,
and took off his boots before he went to the kitchen table
and sat next to Sep.
“Would you like a cup?” April asked.
“Sure would,” he replied. “Where’d you put the gifts, Sep?”
“In the parlor,” Sep said before he finished his cup of hot
chocolate.
“Good.” He took the cup April offered him and glanced at
Nora who snacked on a cookie. “I hope no one minds if I
take that large blanket my ma made.”
April poured her own cup of coffee and shrugged. “I figured
you’d want it since it fits the bed.”
Since Sep was in the room, he decided not to mention
what he wanted to do with it. For the moment, April could
assume he meant to put it on the bed. When he warmed up
and finished his drink, he took the blanket, along with a
couple of other items he found around the house, and made
a divider in his and April’s bedroom. By the time he was
done, April brought Nora in to get her ready for bed.
“What is this?” she asked, holding Nora and staring at the
blanket that acted as a wal between the crib and their bed.
“This is Nora’s temporary room,” he replied, motioning to
the space where the crib sat. “She’l stil end up in the third
bedroom, but we won’t rush it. I understand it’s going to
take some time before you’re ready to put her in there, so
for the time being, this wil offer us some privacy.”
He waited to see if she would argue that the arrangement
wasn’t to her liking, but she nodded and turned to take care
of Nora. Satisfied, he left the room to help Sep finish up the
remaining chores for the day.
An hour later, he returned to the room and placed the gifts
specifical y for April on the dresser. His sisters and sisters-
in-law sure went out of their way to lavish feminine items on
her. He had no idea what half the gifts were for, and he
didn’t care to either. The kerosene lamp was turned low in
the room, but he could tel April was already asleep by the
gentle rise and fal of her back which was turned toward
him.
He tiptoed to the partition and pushed the blanket aside to
check on Nora. Her eyes were closed, her lips slightly
parted, and her expression as content as a baby could get.
He went over to the crib and brought the blanket up to her
chin. She turned her head in his direction but remained
asleep. He was surprised he’d developed such an
attachment to the baby as soon as he had, but he was used
to his nephews and nieces so maybe it came natural y.
It was strange to know he walked into this house to check
on a sick child only to find himself in the role of her father a
couple days later. He shook his head at the wonder of it al .
It was easy to like Nora. She was a baby and had nothing
to do with him getting married. And today he saw a side of
April that made him think having a wife might not be so bad
after al . It certainly had been nice to hold her during the gift
exchange. He no longer felt like the odd man out as he
often felt whenever the family got together and he saw his
brothers and sisters with their families. He didn’t realize a
part of him had been incomplete until now, though he’d
rather die than admit it to anyone, especial y Tom who’d
given him grief in the past about how lonely he had to be
without a good woman to come home to.
He turned his attention back to Nora and saw part of April
in her. He had no idea what April’s first husband looked
like, but he figured some of him had to be in Nora’s face as
wel . It seemed to him, though, that with his nieces and
nephews, each child took after either their mother or father
more, and judging by the similarities between April and
Nora, he figured Nora took after April more. When April had
his children, he wondered which ones would look more like
him and which would look more like her.
He shook his head, wondering what Tom would think if he
knew Joel was actual y entertaining the notion of having
children. Patting Nora on the head, he left her section of the
room and got undressed. The thought did occur to him to
go to bed naked and see what happened in the middle of
the night, but he sensed the timing wasn’t right. He and
April had made a significant move in a positive direction,
and he wasn’t going to rush things tonight. Maybe tomorrow
night.
After he slipped into his night clothes, he settled next to her
in bed. Unlike the other nights, he didn’t turn away from her.
This time, he drew her back to his chest and wrapped his
arm around her. He knew he’d get little sleep by doing this,
but he hadn’t been sleeping that wel anyway. It’d be
pointless to tel his anxious body to calm down because
nothing was going to happen tonight. He was hard and
ready for her, and no doubt, his body would be relentless in
bothering him. Oh wel . He’d gone twenty-two years without
it, and one more night wasn’t going to kil him.
Getting as comfortable as possible, he closed his eyes and
sighed. He opened his eyes, wondering if she heard him
sigh, yet again, and if she would comment, but she didn’t.
Her breathing remained steady and slow, so perhaps she
was stil asleep and spared from what she considered to
be the agony of listening to him sigh. He fought the urge to
laugh. If he thought about it, it was funny that such a simple
thing should bother her. And for some strange reason, he
actual y thought it was cute when she imitated his sighs. He
knew she did it to make a point, but her expression was of
a person who was so flabbergasted she didn’t know how
else to respond to him.
Maybe tomorrow would turn out as wel as, if not better, than
today. He’d like it if it did. Even things with Sep hadn’t been
so bad, minus the punch to the jaw. The kid didn’t have
enough strength to do any serious damage, but he sure had
a temper. Joel needed to teach Sep how to control his
emotions so he didn’t fly off the handle. If Sep did that to the
wrong man, he might end up hurt or dead.
One thing at a time. Nothing was going to happen
overnight. Today was a step in the right direction, but it was
just one step.
Patience, Joel. Just like when recovering
from an illness, this is going to take awhile.
Content with
the reminder, he managed to doze off.
***
that someone was holding her. She’d never been held
through the night. In fact, she hadn’t been held much at al ,
not unless Harvey was having sex with her. Otherwise, he
felt no need to engage in physical contact. After they
married, al touching led to one thing.
But Joel had held her yesterday at his parents’ house and
then again through the night. She liked it. She liked being
held without having to do anything else. It was a pleasant
change, and if she could remain like this for the rest of her
life, she’d be the most content woman who ever lived.
She stayed in bed as dawn broke over the horizon. Though
she heard Sep go down the stairs to do the morning
chores, she decided to hold off on making something warm
to drink. Instead, she snuggled closer to Joel. He sighed,
something that didn’t surprise her, and tightened his hold
on her.
“Are you awake?” she whispered.
“Yes,” he replied, his voice soft enough so that he wouldn’t
wake Nora.
“How long have you been awake?”
“Long enough.” He kissed the top of her head and added,
“Yesterday was nice, wasn’t it?”
“Yes.” She wondered why he kissed her, and on the head of
al places. “Your family is big.”
He chuckled. “And getting bigger al the time.” He nudged
her to rol over, and after considering it, she did so that she
was facing him. Pul ing her into his arms, he kissed her
lightly on the lips. “My mother could have a hundred
grandkids, and she’d stil want more.”
She struggled to push down her apprehension. He was
talking about grandchildren for his mother and his erection
was pressing into her abdomen. It didn’t take much to
figure out where this was leading. She just didn’t know if
she was ready for it. Not that she had to do anything in the
act anyway except spread her legs, but after the pleasant
day yesterday and then being held al night, she was hoping
they could just enjoy more holding. However, he was a man,
and men had different needs from women. She understood