“What?”
“Are you making dinner?”
“One sec!”
Daphne reaches back and grabs the detergent I was reaching for. “This the right one?”
“Yeah.” I gulp as I step back. “Uh, sorry.”
“Don’t be.” She hops off the dryer and disappears into the kitchen.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Keira’s laugh grates on me even after a week of distance. Hearing her muffled cackle though my floor makes me want to punch something.
I played you,
it says.
And I got away with it.
I want to get revenge. Too bad I can’t.
“Russell Arnold Pearson!” Izzy yells. “Get down here and watch this with us!”
I turn up my iPod so loud it hurts my ears, but it’s better than hearing that laugh one more time. Jim Croce starts in on “Operator,” and I have to laugh at myself. It’s about a guy whose girl left him for his “best old ex-friend Ray.” And here he is, trying to be the bigger person to show them it doesn’t matter. But it does. In the end he can’t make the call, because it hurts too much. How fitting.
Sing it, Jim. Sing it.
Izzy’s voice still registers over my music, but I ignore it. I am not going to that couple-fest again. Garret and Keira on one side, Izzy and Colin on the other. Trent has vanished since Halloween—probably due to Izzy having a boyfriend—so it’s just me and Daphne gagging at the random kissing sounds.
My math homework is kicking my ass, though. It’s only slightly less painful than going downstairs. I always let it sit too long, and then I forget what my teacher said in class and screw it all up.
A hand comes down on my shoulder mid-problem, and I about fall over from surprise. Hope it’s not my mom, because she’d ream me for swearing like I just did. I rip my earbuds out and hear Daphne. She’s bent over, laughing so hard she’s gasping for breath. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so scared in my life.”
“I wasn’t scared.” I pause my music. “You just surprised the hell out of me.”
She wipes at her eyes. “That was freaking hilarious.”
“So glad I could give you a laugh at my expense.” I go back to my homework, not in the mood to do whatever it is we’ve been doing lately. She keeps flirting with me, and I shouldn’t like it, but I do. It’s too much of a risk. Daphne isn’t just some girl I can avoid if things go bad. Izzy would kill me if I messed it up. Not exaggerating. And I’m really good at messing things up.
“Hey.” The tone of her voice has changed from teasing to concerned. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“Sure…” She comes closer. I can feel her right behind me.
I sigh. “I’m stressed, okay? I am way behind in math, and the Championship is tomorrow. There’s just so much on my mind.”
She puts a hand on my desk, leaning over to get a look at my homework. “Do you need help? You could come downstairs and we could work on it while we watch. Izzy got this Japanese drama with samurai and ninjas and stuff.”
Ninjas? You can never go wrong with ninjas. Either they’re awesome or so lame they’re funny. I like both. But then Keira’s laugh echoes through the house again.
I shake my head. “I really have to concentrate on this.”
“Well, here.” She looks around my room for a second and then grabs the empty hamper. She turns it over to make a chair, sitting next to me. “I’ll help you. Then you’ll be done faster, and you can relax and watch some sword fighting.”
I try not to smile. “Do you know how embarrassing it is to have a sophomore teach you math?”
She shrugs. “I don’t see what the big deal is. I’ve always been ahead in math. I was subtracting when I was three, for heaven’s sake. Did you know those Academic Decathlon dorks found out I was hiding in normal classes and begged me to join? Apparently, I have higher scores than 98% of the school, but there’s no way I’d compete in math. Ugh. I hate people who show off their intellect, like it makes them better.”
My shoulders slump. “Was that supposed to make me feel better? Because now I feel even stupider.”
She rolls her eyes. “You’re not stupid.”
“Don’t tell me lies just to cheer me up.”
“Why not? You do that to me all the time. And I’m not lying.”
I look at her, surprised to find her serious. “I don’t do that.”
She gives me that look, the one that says she won’t be fooled. “What about when we went to the health department? Or when you danced with me on Halloween? You always lie to cheer me up.”
“I wasn’t lying,” I say before I think better of it.
She freezes. “You weren’t?”
“No.”
“Oh.” She gives me a funny look and then pulls my homework closer. “Um, we better work on this.”
“Yeah.”
She dives right into explaining the assignment, and I might as well put my earbuds back in because I don’t hear a word she says. I keep watching her lips move, how they purse when she concentrates, filling out again when she smiles. She’s had the nose ring so long I barely notice it, but today she’s wearing a stud with a blue gem in it. As she runs her fingers through her silky black hair, I catch the scent of vanilla and spice. I have no idea what she just asked me. I nod anyway, and she goes back to explaining.
When did she get so sexy? All I can think about is kissing her, what it would be like to slip my hand under her shirt and undo her bra, how badly I want to throw her on my bed and…
What the hell am I
thinking
?
I take in a sharp breath. Concentrate on the math. Square roots. Cosine. Nope, not working.
Oh! Got it.
I picture her wearing that nasty green lipstick again. That helps a little. Why did I have to tell her to stop wearing it? It was like the plastic seal on a bottle, and I pulled it off not realizing how much I’d want what was inside.
Okay,
that
train of thought is not helping.
I stand up quickly, knocking over my chair.
“Russ?”
“I can’t concentrate,” I breathe out. “Too stressed. It’s just not happening. Maybe the movie will help me calm down.”
Her brow pinches. “Okay.”
So we go downstairs, and I’m surprised by who’s missing. “Where’s Garr?”
“He’s got some group project for AP physics,” Keira says. “I had no idea I’d be dating such a nerd. A hot nerd. But still.”
I sit in the recliner, determined to ignore her. I have no idea what’s happening in the movie, but it doesn’t matter. They’re mid-swordfight. Nothing like a good samurai beheading to cool you right off.
“You know,” Keira says, “they film most of these in Kyoto, since it’s so old school and there’s a bunch of castles around. I saw people dressed like that all the time, but the tourists would get all hyped about it. So annoying.”
Izzy sighs. “I’m so jealous. Why can’t I live in Japan?”
“I wish I could say it sucks, but other than my asshole step-dad it was awesome. I’d go back in a second if I could.”
She goes off about visiting her step-dad’s family in the country, and then regales us with tales of all the skater boys who were after her. Most of whom she probably slept with. I’m starting to put that together and noticing how she never mentions this stuff when Garret’s around. It’s incredible how much she annoys me now.
Izzy soaks it up. “You have to take me.”
“Sure. Someday we’ll tear up Japan, Iz.” Keira laughs.
The laugh. I can’t take it. How can she act like everything is normal? All I can hear every time she opens her mouth is “Lie lying lie lie lie.” I’m so wound up after half an hour I get up and head for the door.
“Where are you going?” Izzy calls.
“Out.”
“Stick around for another fifteen minutes and you can take me home,” Keira says, like she’d be doing me a favor instead of the other way around.
Without bothering to answer, I slam the door I slam it behind me and take off running.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
At first I jog toward the school, wanting to lift. But then I realize it’s past dinnertime and there’s no way Coach will still be there. So I take a detour and end up at an old, familiar park. There’s a baseball field where Garr and I used to play T-ball, and a playground where I used to push Izzy so high on the swing she’d scream. The trees are old and tall, providing necessary shade in the scorching summer. We used to buy popsicles and sit under them, planning what game to play next.
But on this November day it’s cool even in the sun. I sit on the park bench anyway, exhausted. When did my life get so out of control? My senior year was supposed to be smooth sailing, and it’s been nothing but trouble.
Out of nowhere Daphne pops back into my head. A pit forms in my stomach every time this happens, and it’s been happening more and more often. I don’t get it. I remember when she had braces and wore her hair in two long braids. She used to tell me I had cooties, that my shoes smelled, that my zits looked like alien pods waiting to burst. She’s practically a second sister.
Except she’s not my sister, and we’re not little kids anymore.
I put my head in my hands.
Stop. Think about anything else. The championship is tomorrow. Run through your plays.
The sound of a skateboard fills my ears, which automatically throws me back into Keira land. I wish Izzy and crew would go somewhere else to hang out, because that way I’d at least have some peace and quiet. The skateboard stops right by me and my stomach flips. I look up, letting out a relieved sigh because it’s not her.
“Long time no see,” I say.
Trent Parker sits next to me, his hair long enough that is covers his eyes now. “I think my dad wants to adopt you.”
I can’t suppress the smile. “Whatever.”
“Seriously, dude.” He pushes his hair out of his eyes. “He’s been in mourning all week.”
I scoff.
Trent sits up straighter, scrunching his face into a freakishly good impression of Old Man Parker. “D’you think Russ’ll call today? It just ain’t the same without him. Maybe I should call and see how he’s doin’. Nah, he’s got that game on Friday. Must be busy.”
I laugh. “He’d slap you upside the head for that.”
“I know.” He leans back, looking me in the eye. “Seriously, though, please take my job. You’d be doing me a huge favor.”
I shrug. “I’ll think about it.”
“Cool.”
We sit there in that awkward guy silence for a while. I don’t mind Trent, but it’s not like we have a lot to talk about. I don’t really feel like talking anyway.
“So…,” he finally starts. “Looks like our little deal didn’t help you much.”
I glare at him.
He holds up his hands. “Hey, you’re not the one who lost to a skinny nerd obsessed with World War II. I know a thing or two about rejection.”
I wince. “Okay, you win that one.”
He smirks. “What’s my prize? Eternal humiliation?”
I laugh, but it dies out pretty quickly. The secret bubbles up to the point where I can’t hold it in. If anyone can understand, it’s Trent. He knew Keira was trouble to begin with. And besides, he’s basically my partner in rejection. “You were right about Keira. She was playing me
and
Garret before I found out.”
He doesn’t seem fazed. “Damn, she gets around. I’ve heard about another guy, but you, too, huh?”
“Wait. Another guy? As in not Garret?”
He nods. “My friend Chase Simmons said he saw her at a party with some older skater named Brig. Like,
way
older.”
I hold my breath, almost sad that I’m not surprised. This is my chance to out her without incriminating myself. Garret will be crushed, but it’s probably better to tell him now than wait. First I need solid proof. “What kind of party?”
“Some of the local wannabe bands and punks get together out on some dude’s property and build a bonfire, smoke some weed, get hammered.” He shrugs. “It’s kind of lame, honestly. They’re always the bands that can’t get into clubs, so they suck.”
I have a gut feeling this is why Keira is bailing on The Dork Squad so early. “When?”
“There’s one tonight.” This evil smile crosses his face. “Wanna come with me?”
“Hell, yeah.”
#
Trent wasn’t kidding when he said these parties are lame. A bunch of trucks are pulled around a blazing fire, and from what I can see no one’s really doing anything. The heavy bass from the unidentifiable music they’re playing vibrates Puke’s already shaky doors.
“Stop here,” Trent says when we’re about fifteen yards from the truck circle. “If she’s here, you don’t want her to see you.”
“True.” I put Puke in park and turn off the headlights. It’s so dark the partiers probably can’t see my car past the bonfire.
“So what are you gonna do if she is here? Take a picture or something?”
“No.” I thought about it, but taking a picture like that is dangerous. I’ve lived most of my school years in fear that someone will catch me doing something dorky and post it all over the internet. I can’t do that to another person. Not even Keira. “I just want to see for myself. I can’t tell Garret his girlfriend might be cheating on him without being one hundred percent sure she’s doing it.”
“But…she made out with you.”
I look at him like he’s stupid. “And I’m going to tell Garr that?”
“Good point.”
“I told her if I caught her doing it again I’d tell him. If she didn’t care about that, well, she doesn’t deserve him.” Garret, for all his insecurities, is a good guy. He’d never cheat. Break up with a girl to get with another one? Sure. But who doesn’t do that?
Trent nods. “Let’s go.”
A cold wind cuts through my jacket, but as we get closer to the bonfire it’s not so bad. Trent makes me stay on the edges, worried that people will recognize me. I see a few people from school, but they’re either too smashed or high to notice me. There are older people here, too. I swear some are in their thirties. Which seems sad. I hope I’m not still acting like I’m in high school at thirty.
“Chase!” Trent calls out. A tall, stringy guy in very tight jeans stops mid-stride. I don’t know him well, but I do know he’s into art and hangs out with Trent. As he comes closer, he recognizes me.