Silence 4.5 (9 page)

He stood up. "How am I doing so far?" None of them would look at him, which made him want to laugh again. He snapped his fingers. "What did they call themselves again?" He looked up in thought, even though he knew.

"Archers," Red said softly.

"What was that?"

She clenched her fists. "The Archers."

Bingo. "Ah yes, the Archers. The weapon of the people.” He knew she’d have too much pride not to answer the question. People like her wanted others to know just who they were, so that those people would realize all they had accomplished. It didn’t surprise him in the least that he’d gotten the truth out of these people. “How does the fight go?" he asked, wanting to laugh.

Red narrowed her eyes at him. God she was feisty, he thought. "I wouldn't know, I've been stuck in this fucking place."

"How irritating for you. Tell me, Red-"

"It's Phoenix."

He stopped, surprised. "Tell me, Phoenix, how can you expect to liberate the people of

New Berlin if you can't even manage to take care of yourself?"

She moved as though she planned to attack him, but was stopped by the big guy. Not that

he was worried. Just because Bastian ran the fights and didn’t take part in them himself, didn’t mean he wasn’t a damn good fighter. He’d been the best growing up, which was why he’d gravitated toward this life in the first place. Fighting was what kept you alive in the streets of the New World. Especially in the Outlands, where rules didn’t apply.

His mind went to his sister who he’d lost years ago. Still to this day he didn’t know what had happened to her. "Tell me," he said, forcing old memories and thoughts to the back of his mind where they belonged, "where do you men fit in? I was under the impression the Archers were all women."

"We used to be part of the rebels under the General," Garrett answered.

Bastian let out a low whistle. "Used to be?"

"Let's just say we didn't see eye to eye," the Scotsman said.

"We don't belong here," the big guy added. "Just return Pixie to us and we'll all leave you to your business, and us to ours."

Return Pixie? His body went cold at the thought. If he let them leave, which part of him was inclined to do for some strange reason, he’d have to let Pixie leave too. The thought was revolting to him. Could he go back to his life before she’d entered it? There would be no one soft and gentle waiting for him. No one to lose himself in.

But could he keep them all here? While he didn’t like that they’d come here under false pretenses, and had planned on taking two of his fighters and escaping, there was some humane part of him that recognized they were trying to do good in the world.

Hadn’t his sister always hoped for the same when their parents had been taken away? Hadn’t she always prayed, begging God to make the world whole again? It had made Bastian sick to hear his little sister pray like that, knowing that no god was going to come down and make everything right.

And then he’d gone and left her, walking out into the world to try and figure out a way to make their lives better. But he hadn’t. He’d left and spiraled down a dark hole that was common for those who ventured into the Outlands. Taking up with different groups of thieves. Lying, cheating, killing, anything and everything just to stay alive.

He’d done what he’d had to do, and now look at him. How could he have gotten so off track that he hadn’t once, in all the years that he’d been building his business, thought about Maggie and her damn prayers? What did that say about him? Was there any part of that Bastian even left inside him?

If there was anyone that could possibly find him and bring him back to life, it would be Pixie, he thought. How could he force her to stay when she obviously didn’t belong here with him? Anger and denial ran through his body as he looked up at the men and women watching him.

"No one is going anywhere," he gritted out. Turning, he ripped open the door and walked out, slamming it behind him.

CHAPTER NINE

"Importing."

Pixie looked up in surprise. Bastian stood inside the doorway looking at her. She'd sat on the bed, waiting, for what had felt like hours. At any moment she had expected someone to come and drag her back to the cells. But as more time slipped by, no one came. Not until now.

She furrowed her brows in confusion. "What?"

He seemed to steady himself, as though preparing for some kind of attack. He looked - nervous, and she had no idea why.

Walking further into the room, he stood before her. "You asked about the oranges. I import them from the States. That's how I get my hands on a lot of things I have here."

She stood up slowly, not sure she was hearing him properly. "The States?" she repeated slowly, questioning him just to be certain she'd not imagined it.

He jerked his head.

"That's impossible."

"Not for everyone," he said.

Could he be telling the truth? They’d only found out that the US army. and the United States itself, still existed from Roman a short while ago. It wasn't common knowledge. So how did Bastian know? And Roman had said it was impossible to get reinforcements in from there because the security around them was too tight.

Anything that came close, by sea or air, was reportedly shot down. At least, that's was Roman had told them. And even though he had once been Ludwig's right-hand man, Pixie believed him. There was an honest way about Roman, and she knew he would never do anything to harm, or lie, to Bridgette. So if Bastian was telling the truth, that meant he had figured out a way to have planes or boats land without being detected.

This was huge. It was no wonder he hadn't wanted to answer her questions before. That also explained why he was so suspicious of her. Which begged the question...

She looked up at him. "Why are you telling me this?"

He shrugged, suddenly looking uncomfortable. Like a little boy who had done something nice and was now embarrassed because of it.

"I figured that sort of thing could help you," he said finally.

She tilted her head. "Help me with what?"

"Help all of you...the Archers," he said, shocking her. "I imagine if you really want to put a dent in the New World Order, you're going to need a little back-up."

Fear and relief mixed, knowing that he knew the truth about who she really was. Obviously one of the others had told him. She just hoped that they weren’t hurt in the process. She didn’t think he’d be standing here saying these things to her if he had though. There was no more reason to lie, she thought thankfully. And now he was suggesting he wanted to help them. Her chest tightened. She took a hesitant step forward. "You'd do that?"

He nodded once. "I will. For you. And this place is the perfect location to mobilize an opposition. Ludwig hasn't paid attention to the Outlands since the day he put up those fences around New Berlin. We'd be safe here."

Words were hard to formulate. Was this some sort of cruel joke? From all appearances, he looked like he was being sincere, but part of her was hesitant.

"Why?" she asked finally.

Confusion passed over his face as he glanced around, as though the answer would be lying somewhere in the room.

"Because I know what you're doing is right. Because I've stood back and done nothing for too long." He pushed a hand through his hair. "Fuck, I've even done shit to basically make things worse, never mind better. I've screwed up. And because I owe people more than that. People that I haven't thought about for a long time. I've disappointed a lot of them."

Pixie didn't know what to say to that. All she knew was that hope - real, true hope, blossomed in her. This could be the turning point, she thought. With Bastian's help, they could get a real army in to help them, and make a difference. They wouldn't have to struggle anymore, or live in fear.

It also meant she and her friends were safe now. They could even bring the rest of them here, out of Ludwig's reach, and start to put concrete plans together.

She remembered then what he had said when she’d first asked if he was serious about helping them. His reply had been, "for you".

Another kind of hope started to unfurl inside her. The kind she wouldn't have normally considered. The kind she had never imagined for herself. But it was there. And looking into Bastian's eyes, she thought, perhaps, he also felt something akin to it.

Pixie took a nervous step forward, watching him closely. "You said you'd do it for me. Why?" The last word came out as a whisper. She was terrified to even ask, afraid he might laugh it off and it really not meaning anything.

But he didn't laugh.

His breathing turned heavy, his eyes darkening, as he appeared just as afraid as she was. "Because," he said.

She waited as he seemed to search for more words. Closing the remaining space between them, Bastian reached out to cup her face gently.

"Because if I help, then you can stay here. With me. I don't want to let you go, Pixie. I'm afraid of what I'll turn into if you do, and I’ll keep living this life. You make things better. You make life worth exploring again. I want to see what it would be like if we stayed together."

Pixie swallowed against the lump in her throat. "Why me? You don't even know me."

"I want to know you," he replied. "There's something between us that I know will only get better as we learn more about each other. I want that. I want you."

"I want you too," she said, finally allowing herself to smile.

He sucked in a breath, moving his hand to brush the pad of his thumb along her bottom lip. "Good," he said, matching her smile. "Now I think I should go tell your friends all this. I think they believe I'm going to kill them all."

She chuckled. Wrapping her arms around his neck, Pixie pulled herself against him, bringing their lips close enough that she could feel his breath against hers. "They can wait."

And then she kissed him.

Nothing felt better than having Pixie in his arms. Her mouth fit perfectly with his, robbing him of any coherent thought. All he knew at that moment was that this was right. Whatever he’d done to lead up to this moment, all the lying and cheating, all the bullshit – none of that mattered anymore. He might have fallen far, but he was rectifying that now.

When he’d finally come to the decision to help them, he’d known immediately that it was the right thing to do. Yes, it also meant he could stay with Pixie, which was one of the main reasons it appealed so much to him, but he also knew it was simply the humane thing to do.

Having the connections he did, and knowing he could arrange to speak with someone from the armed forces across the ocean, and possibly get a considerable amount of people here, was what made his past all worth it. If he hadn’t lost himself in the Outlands, and all the shit that came along with it, he wouldn’t have made the connections he had.

Now that would help. And not just him, but all the people of the country he loved – used to love, when it was still full of life and possibilities. Pixie was his possibility. She represented a chance at love and happiness, and he’d been miserable for too long to pass it up.

His sister Maggie always said he deserved to be happy. He hadn’t believed it then. Christ, he hadn’t believed it for all the years since. But he did now. And he would make Pixie happy in return. If there was anything he’d do now, it would be to bring that smile to her face. The one that lit up every line of her beauty; the one that took his breath away every time.

Grabbing the back of her legs, he hoisted her up into his arms, carrying her to the bed. Before he knew it, they were skin to skin, and he felt like he could breathe again. That’s what she was for him – air. Sinking inside her, he held himself above her so he could watch every expression that filled those big, blue eyes as he moved.

She made him feel weak and strong all at the same time. It was confusing and new, but he wasn’t going to let it scare him. He would embrace these new feelings, because at least he was finally feeling something. Before Pixie, everything had been black and white. The same thing day in and day out. She added colour, made things seem brighter and better.

He had no idea why. He could only assume they were just meant to meet, and meant to be together. Maggie always said there was such thing as soulmates. He hadn’t believed her, but he thought perhaps she had been wiser than he gave her credit for.

They had a lot of work ahead of them, but at least they’d be together to face it all. As they lay together afterward, he stroked her hair, loving the feeling of the strands against his fingers. The scent of her was all around him. Nothing had ever been better.

“I really should get back to your friends,” he said.

It must be after midnight by now. He could only imagine how peeved Red – Phoenix – was. It made him smile to think of it. Pixie and she were a lot alike. Except Pixie was just quieter about her anger. Phoenix would tear your head off with just her words. But Pixie didn’t need words to accomplish the same thing. His girl was the strong, silent type, and he liked that about her.

“Which one of them finally cracked?” she asked, her breath warming his naked chest where she lay against him.