Read Since He Really Feels (He Feels) Online
Authors: Lisa Suzanne
“I’m a lucky woman,” I say, and my mother nods.
It’s time to get ready to walk down the aisle. Holly and Eric line up first, just like we rehearsed the night before.
Then Lucy stands beside Jake, now her fiancé.
Lex
takes her place beside Travis, and finally, Jamie and Josh, my matron of honor and Nick’s best man, line up directly in front of my father and me.
I have a quick moment of clarity as I hear the strains of music
start playing. It’s the song we chose for our bridal party to walk down the aisle to.
Travis steps out of line and grabs me by the elbow. “Can I have just one minute?” he asks me.
I nod. “Of course, Trav.”
He pulls me a short distance away so we can have a moment of privacy.
“Jules, you look like the most beautiful bride in the world today.”
I swipe at a tear that spills down my cheek, unable to speak as our entire history together flashes through my memory.
“I’m so happy for you. You’ve found a man who loves you as much as you love him, and that’s all anybody really wants out of life, right?”
I
nod, my heart swelling. He kisses my cheek, my familiar best friend’s words washing over me and finally convincing me that we have all moved on from the painful events of the past.
When Nick told me he wanted Travis to stand up in our wedding, I was floored. When Travis agreed, I was stunned.
But nothing compares to actually having him here with me on my wedding day.
There was a short time where I thought we’d never be able to have the easy friendship we’d always shared, but we
have all grown up a lot in the few short months since Sedona.
Everything
is back to how it always had been.
I
am lucky enough to have my cake and eat it too, so to speak.
“Thanks for being here, Trav.”
“I wouldn’t be anywhere else.” He smiles at me, brushes a tear away with his thumb, and takes his place back in line. He turns once more toward me, mouths, “Love you,” and then he and Lex take their turn walking down the aisle.
Soon it’s just my dad and me. “I love you, Julianne,” he says, his eyes cloudy with unshed tears. I’ve never seen my dad cry before. Even at Jamie’s wedding.
“Love you, Daddy,” I say, and he glances away before emotion overwhelms him.
I glance around me, glad we’d ultimately decided on a church wedding followed by a reception at our house.
The doors to the church open and everyone in the church stands, obstructing my view of my very soon-to-be husband. My dad leads me up the aisle, and I’m grateful for his strength as tears stream down my face just walking toward my future.
I finally see him standing at the altar. Our eyes meet, and I see a smile break out across his handsome face. He looks calm and composed while suddenly I'm a nervous wreck.
“We are gathered here today…” the priest begins, but I’ve tuned him out because I’m staring at Nick, unable to fathom that someone that gorgeous is pledging his love to me for the rest of eternity.
I hear my dad say, “Her mother and I do,” but I don’t even know what the question was because my eyes are glued to Nick’s. Everything about this moment is exactly right, exactly how it should be, and exactly how I dreamed it would be.
And I can’t wait for our future together to begin.
EPILOGUE
JULIANNE – FIVE YEARS LATER
He’s the first person I see when I walk into the restaurant.
“Hey, Jules,” he smiles, and I smile back and take my seat next to him. He drapes his arm casually across the back of my chair as I pick up a menu and glance through it.
“Hey, Trav.”
He leans in and kisses my cheek.
“Where is everyone?” I ask.
“On their way, I assume.”
“How was your day?”
“Fine.”
He pauses, and I sense that it wasn’t really fine at all. I glance over at him, and I see the man I know so well. I raise an eyebrow at him. “It’s tough being the one in charge sometimes.” His voice is soft.
I nod and place my hand on his arm. “I know it is. But you’re so good at it.”
His eyes meet mine, and I can see the sadness in his. “I had to fire someone today.”
“Oh, Trav.
I’m so sorry.”
“Thanks. It was awful. She cried.”
“She?”
“Jasmine from Events.”
I nod in understanding. I met her a few times, and I immediately know why he had to fire her. If she wasn’t wearing inappropriately short skirts, she was messing something up, and that just wasn’t okay when Miller Designs was planning events of the kind of caliber that we now cater to.
“Auntie Julie!” I hear, and then a small child is racing into my lap.
With her blonde hair and blue eyes, Hadley is my sister’s little mini-me, and I love her to pieces. “Hadders!” I smile as I squeeze her to me.
“When is baby Auntie Julie coming out?” she asks, rubbing my stomach.
“Soon, I hope,” I smile.
Travis looks over at me. “We all hope soon,” he smiles.
I roll my eyes. He – among others – has had to listen to me bitch about swollen ankles for the past eight months, and I’m sure he’s ready for it to end.
“Hey, Jules,” Jamie says, holding hands with Brady as Brandon pulls out some chairs for their adorable family of four. She winks at Travis.
“Hey, you.”
I feel hands over my eyes, and then I hear a voice next to me. “Guess who!”
“Lex?” I guess from the sound of her voice.
“You always know,” she pouts, and she takes a seat across from me.
More people pile into the restaurant: Holly and Andrew, still dating. Lucy and Jake, married with one baby and another on the way.
Soon our table is full except for three vacant seats.
“Did I beat them here?” I hear a voice behind me.
I turn and grin at the girl who I once mistakenly misjudged, the girl whose ultimate forgiveness allowed all of us to move on,
the girl who was married to my best friend and who had become one of my own best friends, too.
“Hey, Lindsay,” I smile. She’s holding the beautiful six-month-old Travis Junior – better known as TJ, a nickname given to him by his mother – in her arms, and Travis stands and kisses Lindsay and then his baby. I can physically see the love he has for his family as he gazes first at his wife and then at his child, and it warms my heart to know how everything has a way of working out the way it’s supposed to.
I think about how differently this all could have turned out. Travis and I could have ended up together, which would have been a complete and utter mistake. Instead, Travis found Lindsay and fell in love with her, the same kind of forever love that I share with my husband of nearly five years. The man of the hour.
I look around at the faces glowing around the table and can’t help but feel the love. Everyone has gathered here to celebrate Nick’s birthday, and I know that he will love this surprise party much more than the little family get together I had planned several years before.
I spot Josh first, my brother-in-law who is like a brother to me. I know that Nick is behind him, and my heart skips a beat just knowing that he’s in the same room as me even after all of these years.
Our love has grown exponentially in the five years we have been together, and the baby boy growing inside of me is living proof of that.
“Surprise!” We all yell when we spot him, and a grin spreads across his handsome face. Five years older, and maybe five years sexier. I realize every single day how blessed I am. I have a job that I love where I get to work side by side with my husband and our best friends, Travis and Lindsay. I have a loving husband and a baby on the way. I have a tight circle of friends and family who would do anything for me.
Nick winks at me, and I melt, transported back to the day I first met him in the conference room at McMillan Marketing and marveling at all that has changed for us through the years.
Through the pain and the secrets and the misunderstandings, life always seems to align just as it should, and it is no different with us.
I am where I am meant to be, with the man who was made for me, and I know that this is just exactly as it should
be.
The End
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
When I published the first book in this trilogy, I had no idea what was in store over the next year of my life. I didn’t know any bloggers. I didn’t know any authors. I was just a girl who liked to write and dreamed of publishing. My network has grown leaps and bounds over the past
year, and I have met a lot of people who I now call friends.
My husband always gets the first THANK YOU because of his support and encouragement. He’s the one who has to deal with me talking about these people in my head, forgetting to do the laundry, making something quick for dinner, and the constant dinging of my phone. That goes for Sadie, the world’s best dog, too.
I also want to thank my family and friends outside of my writing world. I finally broke down and gave copies of my book to my mom, and I am pleased to announce that after reading
How He Really Feels
, she is totally Team Nick, but now that she has started
What He Really Feels,
she’s falling for Travis, too.
Thank you to my awesome street team, Team LSD. The eye candy pics are always motivational, but I love that we have a group of ladies who can count on each other. It was Sheri who called the ladies on the team her “sisters,” and that really made me pause and realize that this group of women has become family both to me and each other. Thanks for the hardcore pimping, ladies!
Karen Marks, my PA who has also become a good friend, I appreciate all you do to help make my life easier when I know how busy you are. Jennifer Dotson, you are always there for me when I need you, and I appreciate you so much.
To the countless blogs and author friends who have promoted my books: THANK YOU! There are literally hundreds and too many to name here, but just know that I appreciate all that you do for indie authors like me. I need to give a special thank you to Jen and Karen from Just One More Page for putting together the cover reveal for this book, to Christine Stanley at The Hype PR for the release day blitz, and to Lydia from HEA Bookshelf for the Separation Anxiety blitz right before the release of this book.
To my readers… without you, this would all still just be a dream. Instead, I’m living my dream every day. Thank you for purchasing my books, for supporting me, and for dropping me messages. And thank you especially for leaving reviews. Authors depend on your reviews to get their names out, so please leave a review when you’re finished reading! XOXOXO
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Lisa Suzanne started handwriting her books on yellow legal pads after she took a creative writing class in high school. She still has those legal pads full of stories, but now one of them is published under the title How He Really Feels. She currently works as a full time high school English teacher, and her favorite part of the year is summer. She has been blessed with the world’s best dog, a supportive family, and a husband who encouraged her to publish after reading one of her novels. She likes the advice of Ernest Hemingway’s famous quote, “Write drunk. Edit sober.”
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ALSO BY LISA SUZANNE
HOW HE REALLY FEELS (HE FEELS, BOOK 1)
Julianne Becker is desperately in love with her boss, Nick Matthews. She has daydreamed about him since the day she first met him a year earlier, but she is firmly stuck in the friend-zone until New Year’s Eve, when the game completely changes and she finds out how Nick really feels about her. They embark on a sexy affair that’s everything Julianne ever dreamed of... except she can’t tell anyone about it. What will happen if anyone finds out about their secret relationship? And how will her lifelong best friend, Travis Miller, react when Julianne begins a relationship with someone who isn’t him?
How He Really Feels is a novel that explores relationships and love between coworkers and friends. It contains some adult situations and is intended for mature readers.